JazzyMom17

My first fill was Monday. 2.7CCs in an 11CC band. Hardly anything right??? WRONG!!!!!!! I was supposed to be on liquids until this morning. But last night I got SOO hungry, I decided to sneak a spoonfull of really SOFT Tuna Helper from my daughter's rejects. How bad could it be? I did that after surgery and didn't have ANY problems. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so glad my family was upstairs! I immediately felt INTENSE pain then the sliming started. NO NO NO!!!! I decided I was NEVER going to SLIME----remember???!!! Rushed to the kitchen sink---horrible!!! OOOOOWWWW!!!!!!! WHY did I eat that stupid bite???? I downed about 5 Papaya enzmes tablets ---but they just came back up too---and there was my blood pressure pill again. I calmed down a little and then went upstairs (with a tupperware bowl in case) and was able to sit there in hideous pain for about 5 minutes then RUSHED to the bathroom again. Whew!!! Much better now!!! I sat there on the bathroom floor wiped out, but felt a strange new hope overwhelming me. IS THIS REALLY GOING TO WORK THIS TIME!?!?!?!? I had been fully expecting to tell little to no difference this first fill...but WOW!!!! Just like that I am in the Lap Band world----and all that information packet and all the things my awesome nurse wrote down----suddenly they mean the world to me and I'm hanging on every word. This morning was supposed to be first day of "soft foods". Um...not so much. I'm chalking it up to the fact that the puking must have irritated my band....so the 1/4 cup of scrambled eggs hurt like heck. So back to liquids this morning. I even self-righteously drank a Myoplex RTD drink at the cafe in my gym. Then went upstairs and started man-sweating again on the machines. I could only go for an hour today---literally started locking up---calories please!!!!! So then I took my little girl to Boston Market and got some of their mashed sweet potatoes. I lived on that in my two weeks mushy stage. I could eat about 2 spoonfulls of that and 1 spoonful of soft rotisserie chicken (chewed 1000 times) and I was in pain and ready to GO!!!! I'll drink another protein shake again tonight to make sure I get my calories and protein in...but WOW!!! I'm still in shock that a fill can do so much. My next fill appointment is August 24th. I'm assuming it will loosen up by then!!! Oh, and get this...I HAD to weigh myself on the gym scales....and I was at an alltime LOW!!! All the pounds I had gained back in Banster Hell are dead and gone. And if you're a member of SWA---you know the travesty of what I am about to say---I had a damp towel wrapped around me!! So all-time low is even that much more something to celebrate!! I had half a mind to let that towel fall off, and check it again ...but......no.

My first fill was Monday. 2.7CCs in an 11CC band. Hardly anything right??? WRONG!!!!!!! I was supposed to be on liquids until this morning. But last night I got SOO hungry, I decided to sneak a spoonfull of really SOFT Tuna Helper from my daughter's rejects. How bad could it be? I did that after surgery and didn't have ANY problems. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so glad my family was upstairs! I immediately felt INTENSE pain then the sliming started. NO NO NO!!!! I decided I was NEVER going to SLIME----remember???!!! Rushed to the kitchen sink---horrible!!! OOOOOWWWW!!!!!!! WHY did I eat that stupid bite???? I downed about 5 Papaya enzmes tablets ---but they just came back up too---and there was my blood pressure pill again. I calmed down a little and then went upstairs (with a tupperware bowl in case) and was able to sit there in hideous pain for about 5 minutes then RUSHED to the bathroom again. Whew!!! Much better now!!! I sat there on the bathroom floor wiped out, but felt a strange new hope overwhelming me. IS THIS REALLY GOING TO WORK THIS TIME!?!?!?!? I had been fully expecting to tell little to no difference this first fill...but WOW!!!! Just like that I am in the Lap Band world----and all that information packet and all the things my awesome nurse wrote down----suddenly they mean the world to me and I'm hanging on every word. This morning was supposed to be first day of "soft foods". Um...not so much. I'm chalking it up to the fact that the puking must have irritated my band....so the 1/4 cup of scrambled eggs hurt like heck. So back to liquids this morning. I even self-righteously drank a Myoplex RTD drink at the cafe in my gym. Then went upstairs and started man-sweating again on the machines. I could only go for an hour today---literally started locking up---calories please!!!!! So then I took my little girl to Boston Market and got some of their mashed sweet potatoes. I lived on that in my two weeks mushy stage. I could eat about 2 spoonfulls of that and 1 spoonful of soft rotisserie chicken (chewed 1000 times) and I was in pain and ready to GO!!!! I'll drink another protein shake again tonight to make sure I get my calories and protein in...but WOW!!! I'm still in shock that a fill can do so much. My next fill appointment is August 24th. I'm assuming it will loosen up by then!!! Oh, and get this...I HAD to weigh myself on the gym scales....and I was at an alltime LOW!!! All the pounds I had gained back in Banster Hell are dead and gone. And if you're a member of SWA---you know the travesty of what I am about to say---I had a damp towel wrapped around me!! So all-time low is even that much more something to celebrate!! I had half a mind to let that towel fall off, and check it again ...but......no.

I could have competed in a hot-dog eating contest and won on Sunday. Monday was my first fill and WOW!!! I can't even begin to tell you the difference!!!! SERIOUSLY eat VERRY VERRY carefully!!!!

Yeay!! I'm right there with you, girl!! Just took my daughter to Boston Market--she was craving their cornbread. 2 spoonfulls of mashed sweet potatos and a spoonfull of rottisseire chicken was all I could do...and THAT hurt!!! I used to be sooooo worried that sitting there denying myself all the wonderful food would just be the worst feeling in the world....but it's SOOO not!! It doesn't feel like denying yourself---it feels like power. And PAIN AVOIDANCE!!! :thumbup:) We'll see how it feels once this fill wears off! :eek:)

I felt SOOO much the same the day that I got RE-married almost three years ago. I thought that if there WAS any motivation...it would be that Maggie Sottero dress. But even with that---I wasn't able to do it and I regret it to this day. Tomorrow will be fine. You will look back and see that day as a day that "defined" the new you. A mark in the sand that you stepped across. The best thing you ever did for yourself! I am not even two months past that day---and things haven't been easy for me. But my first fill was Monday and I can already tell a HUGE difference....suddenly I am in the lapband world! I would do it again in a heartbeat--problems and all. My only advice at this point in time is to be patient with yourself and your progress. After surgery I couldn't even tell I had anything done---but maybe you will!! But I can tell now!!!! Night and Day difference!!! Then when you're down the 30 plus the 50....get that dress back out and get some pictures taken in it again!! :thumbup:) Keep your chin up and your shoulders back. YOU will make this chance work! One day at a time!!! Good luck tomorrow!

You look 15 years younger!!!!!!!!! Way to turn back the clock!! Keep it up!

I got banded on 6/17....I had my first fill yesterday which I just blogged about. It really wasn't bad at all. I have had alot of the same experience as you. I initially lost weight after surgery, but once I got over my post op pneumonia and staph infection I gained those six or seven pounds back. I felt so depressed that I hadn't lost alot more in the six weeks AFTER surgery, but it isn't called "Bandster Hell" for nothing. I had NO restriction---could eat my arm whole with nothing stopping me!! :sneaky:) But my Dr. told me yesterday...Today is the day your weightloss journey begins. (Not June 17th)....so it begins. You will get thru this point. There are no failures---just delayed success. Take one day at a time.

Yesterday was my first fill. I was strangly more nervous about that dumb fill than I was the surgery. The great nurse at my surgeon's office told me that the guy would press around on my stomach until he found it and that sometimes there might be alot of scar tissue and that it might be really uncomfortable the first time. SO I laid down on my back and had my husband feel around if he could tell where my port is. He could feel it with ABSOLUTELY no problem---could even feel it with his palm (hand flat)....um, WHAT is this going to look like once I lose 70 pounds???? :cursing:) Oh no!!! Anyway, the surgeon found it with no problem, but the first "pinch" of the syringe didnt hit the port---It HIT it, but didn't go in...So he poked around a few more times (made me laugh at something funny) and then it was in. It really wasn't bad at all. So he and I walked over to the x-ray machine to drink the barium....syringe sticking out of my belly. Thanks to LapBandTalk..I was fully prepared for that part. The barium was not bad at all. Nothing like the cup and a half I had to drink for the upper GI before surgery. He had me take a big swallow. WHOOSH right thru without even a pause--just like EVERYTHING else, I said!! Then put several CCs in and I took another drink and refluxed a little, but it felt fine going down. So he took some out and it was perfect. You could see my new LITTLE pouch forming at the top of the band. Cute!! Full of barium. Then he had me drink water (not x-rayed) I took a gulp---I've had zero restriction until this point so I still gulp water.... I felt something "hard" at the base of my neck. He took some more out and it went thru. I drank more water...no problems. Then it was done. Easy peasy. He told me "Today is the day your weightloss journey begins". That felt SOOO good to hear that. I know I've lost a such a menial amount up till now and it has been hard as heck to get and keep that 10 pounds off since beginning of my preop diet. I've felt so bleak, b/c I really haven't lost ANYTHING since surgery and in my mind June 17th was the day my weightloss journey began...but really this is where it starts and that felt good. I was STARVING when I went in for my fill. It was at 1:00--but I had to be at the pre-op room at 12:00 stomach completely empty. Let me tell you, by 1:45 when I left I was SOOOO full and I didn't want anything to eat until 4:00. HAHAHA....nothing like barium for lunch!!! I had soup for supper---and didn't feel any restriction, but I guess I'm not supposed to for the liquid part. But when I went to bed I wasn't hungry....that is a great thing! I was up and at the gym by 5:15 this morning. Starbucks IS a liquid, BTW!!!!! That is another good thing. I did 45 minutes of cardio and then some core resistence work. By the way----I AM SWEATING LIKE A MAN!!!!!! What the heck is up with that??? I think it's because my thyroid medicine is jacked up and my Endocrinologist is trying to find the right balance for me. But, seriously, sweat DRIPPING OFF THE END OF MY NOSE!!! I used to just "glisten" and this is just embarrasing. Oh, well. I made it, thru and then wiped up the puddles. UGH!!! I have been working out ALOT lately. I'm starting to feel that addiction coming back and the high from my heart beating out of my chest and that great body exhaustion feeling. Now for the scales to start showing this effort!!

Yesterday was my first fill. I was strangly more nervous about that dumb fill than I was the surgery. The great nurse at my surgeon's office told me that the guy would press around on my stomach until he found it and that sometimes there might be alot of scar tissue and that it might be really uncomfortable the first time. SO I laid down on my back and had my husband feel around if he could tell where my port is. He could feel it with ABSOLUTELY no problem---could even feel it with his palm (hand flat)....um, WHAT is this going to look like once I lose 70 pounds???? :sneaky:) Oh no!!! Anyway, the surgeon found it with no problem, but the first "pinch" of the syringe didnt hit the port---It HIT it, but didn't go in...So he poked around a few more times (made me laugh at something funny) and then it was in. It really wasn't bad at all. So he and I walked over to the x-ray machine to drink the barium....syringe sticking out of my belly. Thanks to LapBandTalk..I was fully prepared for that part. The barium was not bad at all. Nothing like the cup and a half I had to drink for the upper GI before surgery. He had me take a big swallow. WHOOSH right thru without even a pause--just like EVERYTHING else, I said!! Then put several CCs in and I took another drink and refluxed a little, but it felt fine going down. So he took some out and it was perfect. You could see my new LITTLE pouch forming at the top of the band. Cute!! Full of barium. Then he had me drink water (not x-rayed) I took a gulp---I've had zero restriction until this point so I still gulp water.... I felt something "hard" at the base of my neck. He took some more out and it went thru. I drank more water...no problems. Then it was done. Easy peasy. He told me "Today is the day your weightloss journey begins". That felt SOOO good to hear that. I know I've lost a such a menial amount up till now and it has been hard as heck to get and keep that 10 pounds off since beginning of my preop diet. I've felt so bleak, b/c I really haven't lost ANYTHING since surgery and in my mind June 17th was the day my weightloss journey began...but really this is where it starts and that felt good. I was STARVING when I went in for my fill. It was at 1:00--but I had to be at the pre-op room at 12:00 stomach completely empty. Let me tell you, by 1:45 when I left I was SOOOO full and I didn't want anything to eat until 4:00. HAHAHA....nothing like barium for lunch!!! I had soup for supper---and didn't feel any restriction, but I guess I'm not supposed to for the liquid part. But when I went to bed I wasn't hungry....that is a great thing! I was up and at the gym by 5:15 this morning. Starbucks IS a liquid, BTW!!!!! That is another good thing. I did 45 minutes of cardio and then some core resistence work. By the way----I AM SWEATING LIKE A MAN!!!!!! What the heck is up with that??? I think it's because my thyroid medicine is jacked up and my Endocrinologist is trying to find the right balance for me. But, seriously, sweat DRIPPING OFF THE END OF MY NOSE!!! I used to just "glisten" and this is just embarrasing. Oh, well. I made it, thru and then wiped up the puddles. UGH!!! I have been working out ALOT lately. I'm starting to feel that addiction coming back and the high from my heart beating out of my chest and that great body exhaustion feeling. Now for the scales to start showing this effort!!

I was banded June 17th, and I am only down 13 pounds so far. I feel really discouraged with this---mainly because I was down to 197 and now am at 201 again. People that don't know that I've had the band have commented on how much weight I've lost--though.. and the people that DO know I had the band have gone on and on about it. I know that it's only 13 pounds though---so I feel ruled by the scale. I am thinking about weighing myself once a week and focusing more on working out and eating right.

EVERY day when I get on the scale I think "scale whore"....EVERY DAY!!! HAHAHAHA!!! I will be there! Count me in... Do I get extra points because my spreadsheet has a graph (complete with a linear prediction of where I WILL be at Christmas time based on past performance???)

So, I went on vacation last week---when I got home I had gained five pounds!!! In a week!!!! I really wasn't eating a whole lot more than I had been either!!! At least it didn't feel like it. I had my first "experience" and I'm not really sure WHAT it was. I had eaten a sandwhich for lunch (shaved turkey, swiss and white bread)....and about an hour later, I got an extremely uncomfortable feeling. Like a burp (one of my HUGE HUGE burps) was stuck under my sandwhich. Pain in my chest--like gas pains. Then I started getting nauseous. So I ran to the bathroom and started heaving. NOTHING came up. I did it about three times and then got my papaya enzymes and at 5 of those. The feeling went away shortly after that when I finally burped. I have heard it said that once you have the band it is impossible to eat like BEFORE you had a band. Um......???? Really???? It feels completely like it did BEFORE the band--NOTHING different. I went to see the DR for my second postop required BEFORE a fill. The NP said that I was doing great (even though on their scales I had gained 7 pounds back since last postop visit.) She said six weeks of healing THEN the weightloss goals should start. The PCP gave me the ok to start working out after my pneumonia and staph infection. So, this week I started and it feels so good. But, the scales just went up and up (.6 pounds/day). Finally, Wednesday on the way home from work feeling really discouraged about all of this I decided to go back on my carb restricted pre-op diet. Maxing out at 50 carbs/day....to lose 13 pounds and get back onto my goal track. I also need to feel that carb-addiction broken and my hideous hunger and cravings to go away. So, back to the old grind. I understand what the nurse was saying and I know that is "reasonable"...but I don't feel like that is good enough for me. I want more out of this, and I want to weigh 150 by Christmas. Sweet spot or not---I want to bust my butt (hopefully dieting for the last time) during these next six months or so...and then let the band do what it should do to keep it off. So, I lost 2 pounds yesterday, got the preop diet headaches---carb withdrawal and felt like death on a stick. But I was like, BRING IT!!!! I'm ready for anything but being fat the rest of my life. August 3rd....WHY SO LONG to get a first fill!?!?! But anyway, the nurse said that if after a week, I feel like I need more---call and they'll get me in right away. All I need is a week between fills and they want to get me to my "sweet spot" as soon as possible. Amen to that.

So, I went on vacation last week---when I got home I had gained five pounds!!! In a week!!!! I really wasn't eating a whole lot more than I had been either!!! At least it didn't feel like it. I had my first "experience" and I'm not really sure WHAT it was. I had eaten a sandwhich for lunch (shaved turkey, swiss and white bread)....and about an hour later, I got an extremely uncomfortable feeling. Like a burp (one of my HUGE HUGE burps) was stuck under my sandwhich. Pain in my chest--like gas pains. Then I started getting nauseous. So I ran to the bathroom and started heaving. NOTHING came up. I did it about three times and then got my papaya enzymes and at 5 of those. The feeling went away shortly after that when I finally burped. I have heard it said that once you have the band it is impossible to eat like BEFORE you had a band. Um......???? Really???? It feels completely like it did BEFORE the band--NOTHING different. I went to see the DR for my second postop required BEFORE a fill. The NP said that I was doing great (even though on their scales I had gained 7 pounds back since last postop visit.) She said six weeks of healing THEN the weightloss goals should start. The PCP gave me the ok to start working out after my pneumonia and staph infection. So, this week I started and it feels so good. But, the scales just went up and up (.6 pounds/day). Finally, Wednesday on the way home from work feeling really discouraged about all of this I decided to go back on my carb restricted pre-op diet. Maxing out at 50 carbs/day....to lose 13 pounds and get back onto my goal track. I also need to feel that carb-addiction broken and my hideous hunger and cravings to go away. So, back to the old grind. I understand what the nurse was saying and I know that is "reasonable"...but I don't feel like that is good enough for me. I want more out of this, and I want to weigh 150 by Christmas. Sweet spot or not---I want to bust my butt (hopefully dieting for the last time) during these next six months or so...and then let the band do what it should do to keep it off. So, I lost 2 pounds yesterday, got the preop diet headaches---carb withdrawal and felt like death on a stick. But I was like, BRING IT!!!! I'm ready for anything but being fat the rest of my life. August 3rd....WHY SO LONG to get a first fill!?!?! But anyway, the nurse said that if after a week, I feel like I need more---call and they'll get me in right away. All I need is a week between fills and they want to get me to my "sweet spot" as soon as possible. Amen to that.

Great job, Marie! I am hearing SO many people that are getting their first fills already and I am JEALOUS!!! They have my first one scheduled on August 3rd.

WOW!!! You look SOOO good!!! Keep up the good work!!! WOO-HOO!!!

That's Awesome!!! Congratulations!!

Ok...counting down the days....almost three weeks postop!! I haven't lost hardly ANYTHING since the surgery--but I guess that is normal--the good thing is I haven't GAINED anything yet. It's just that I'm getting a little panicky like I'm not doing enough. Like I need to get my head wrapped around what is going on--or not going on with my weightloss. I am feeling like I could eat ANYTHING right now. I haven't thrown up, PB'd, Slimed or anything yet. Thank GOD for that!! I haven't been trying to test my band really---but if it's soft then I'll eat it. And I can eat ALOT of some things!! I can drink with my meals--no problem. I can do pretty much everything I could do without the band--salad, watermelon, bread. I haven't tried rice yet...or nuts. The "hard stop" feeling that I got the first couple of weeks seems to be passing...so Bandster Hell...HERE I AM! I've set a goal for myself of 10 pounds a month. I'm RIGHT at goal now for my first month post surgery---so I am sensing urgency of NOW is the time to get a grip...and work with my band! I have my first postop appt with my dr tomorrow--I know it's WAY out from surgery, but I've been so sick with pneumonia..etc. that now is the first time I can. Sixteen pounds gone since I was there for my preop appt...which is good, because I haven't obsessed about dieting or food at all. It is changing it's place in my heart from living to eat to eating because I have to. Family vacation is next week in Tennessee...I'm really excited about it and for the first time feel this sense of FREEDOM about it all. With my family--vacations revolve around food---preparation, cleaning up, having enough desserts, more prep, food, food, food. This time I don't feel the panick that I have always felt. It's hard to explain, but the diets to prep for seeing family--then getting there and feeling the excitement and the failure of overeating the whole time. This time---totally different. THIS FEELING OF INDIFFERENCE towards food is the EXACT reason I needed the band. The chains are starting to loosen their hold. I got my hair done Saturday! It's DARK and totally different but I love the cut. The color will take some getting used to. :confused3:) But I love the new look and fresh start feeling. And I went shopping for some capris. I didn't get a smaller size yet, but I liked my reflection in the mirror. My tushi is getting smaller!! :oD

Ok...counting down the days....almost three weeks postop!! I haven't lost hardly ANYTHING since the surgery--but I guess that is normal--the good thing is I haven't GAINED anything yet. It's just that I'm getting a little panicky like I'm not doing enough. Like I need to get my head wrapped around what is going on--or not going on with my weightloss. I am feeling like I could eat ANYTHING right now. I haven't thrown up, PB'd, Slimed or anything yet. Thank GOD for that!! I haven't been trying to test my band really---but if it's soft then I'll eat it. And I can eat ALOT of some things!! I can drink with my meals--no problem. I can do pretty much everything I could do without the band--salad, watermelon, bread. I haven't tried rice yet...or nuts. The "hard stop" feeling that I got the first couple of weeks seems to be passing...so Bandster Hell...HERE I AM! I've set a goal for myself of 10 pounds a month. I'm RIGHT at goal now for my first month post surgery---so I am sensing urgency of NOW is the time to get a grip...and work with my band! I have my first postop appt with my dr tomorrow--I know it's WAY out from surgery, but I've been so sick with pneumonia..etc. that now is the first time I can. Sixteen pounds gone since I was there for my preop appt...which is good, because I haven't obsessed about dieting or food at all. It is changing it's place in my heart from living to eat to eating because I have to. Family vacation is next week in Tennessee...I'm really excited about it and for the first time feel this sense of FREEDOM about it all. With my family--vacations revolve around food---preparation, cleaning up, having enough desserts, more prep, food, food, food. This time I don't feel the panick that I have always felt. It's hard to explain, but the diets to prep for seeing family--then getting there and feeling the excitement and the failure of overeating the whole time. This time---totally different. THIS FEELING OF INDIFFERENCE towards food is the EXACT reason I needed the band. The chains are starting to loosen their hold. I got my hair done Saturday! It's DARK and totally different but I love the cut. The color will take some getting used to. ) But I love the new look and fresh start feeling. And I went shopping for some capris. I didn't get a smaller size yet, but I liked my reflection in the mirror. My tushi is getting smaller!! :oD

I'm SOOOOO with you. Feeling the carb addiction--especially SUGAR---ALOT now...I'm two weeks out from being banded. I'm taking this weekend to have a "Come to Jesus" meeting with myself to figure out WHY and HOW to break this carb fettish. I was doing SOOO good on my Pre-OP diet, but then they gave me nothing but grape juice for two days after having surgery---so after those two days HOOKED AGAIN! I get my first fill the first of August....looking forward to that!! We can do this!

I'm kindof feeling a little panick and a little obsessive about the sense of needing to make a plan. My new "lifestyle" of eating. (NOT calling it a DIET!!!) Here's the thing. I followed my PREOP Adkins--then two days preop liquid adkins---then one week postop liquid diet to a tee. When I was sitting on my hospital bed one week postop I called, and the awesome nurse at my LB Surgeon's office told me that it was ok to start introducing purees and soft foods. After I got over the initial shock from hearing THAT I did. I've only gained a pound since then, but I've found myself during the liquid postop phase especially, using sugar again---alot of it. They gave me only grape juice for two whole days after surgery. Which coming off Adkins tasted like nectar from the gods. Anyway....I am able to eat almost anything now. I am not "testing" my band--but if it is something soft (meatloaf) then I will eat it. I haven't PB'ed, Slimed, or thrown anything up yet. But I definitely feel the "hard stop" feeling and the need to march the halls after I eat something just to try to either get some gas out of my stomach or move the food thru--not sure which. Some times I can only eat a few bites and it's like "AAAAGGGH!!" I have to walk....other times--like last night I ate a whole hotdog/bun/ketchup/mustard/onions/relish and could have still kept eating. Also---I have not ever had a problem drinking when I eat. I know I shouldn't and try not to, but when I forget, it goes right thru. I was reading BandGroupie's blog yesterday about "redefining full" and that really struck a chord with me. I'm still feeling restriction, but I'm finding myself mindlessly eating or comfort eating STILL. That is what scares me---to death. Did I have this surgery without really nailing down head hunger first--the real culprit?? Can I get a grip on this NOW?? I am on the verge of "Bandster Hell" I know it--if I'm not already there, but I really want to get a grip on my mind before I'm completely in the middle of it all. There is alot going on. Next week my family is meeting in Gatlinburg, TN....can't wait. But everything has revolved around food. :crying:) I do feel a real sense of FREEDOM like never before---where before I would have been DREADING this free-for-all of food like the plague then getting there and going WAY OVERBOARD. This time I have a calm sense of "cool, food" indiference. I'll get to taste some things I haven't tasted in a long time, but it won't rule or consume me. That

I'm kindof feeling a little panick and a little obsessive about the sense of needing to make a plan. My new "lifestyle" of eating. (NOT calling it a DIET!!!) Here's the thing. I followed my PREOP Adkins--then two days preop liquid adkins---then one week postop liquid diet to a tee. When I was sitting on my hospital bed one week postop I called, and the awesome nurse at my LB Surgeon's office told me that it was ok to start introducing purees and soft foods. After I got over the initial shock from hearing THAT I did. I've only gained a pound since then, but I've found myself during the liquid postop phase especially, using sugar again---alot of it. They gave me only grape juice for two whole days after surgery. Which coming off Adkins tasted like nectar from the gods. Anyway....I am able to eat almost anything now. I am not "testing" my band--but if it is something soft (meatloaf) then I will eat it. I haven't PB'ed, Slimed, or thrown anything up yet. But I definitely feel the "hard stop" feeling and the need to march the halls after I eat something just to try to either get some gas out of my stomach or move the food thru--not sure which. Some times I can only eat a few bites and it's like "AAAAGGGH!!" I have to walk....other times--like last night I ate a whole hotdog/bun/ketchup/mustard/onions/relish and could have still kept eating. Also---I have not ever had a problem drinking when I eat. I know I shouldn't and try not to, but when I forget, it goes right thru. I was reading BandGroupie's blog yesterday about "redefining full" and that really struck a chord with me. I'm still feeling restriction, but I'm finding myself mindlessly eating or comfort eating STILL. That is what scares me---to death. Did I have this surgery without really nailing down head hunger first--the real culprit?? Can I get a grip on this NOW?? I am on the verge of "Bandster Hell" I know it--if I'm not already there, but I really want to get a grip on my mind before I'm completely in the middle of it all. There is alot going on. Next week my family is meeting in Gatlinburg, TN....can't wait. But everything has revolved around food. ) I do feel a real sense of FREEDOM like never before---where before I would have been DREADING this free-for-all of food like the plague then getting there and going WAY OVERBOARD. This time I have a calm sense of "cool, food" indiference. I'll get to taste some things I haven't tasted in a long time, but it won't rule or consume me. That

YEAY! Happy Bandiversary!

I'm feeling the freedom in your voice!!! Woo-Hoo! This is huge!! Congrats!

Hey, guys... Tomorrow is two week anniversary of getting banded!! I am down officially 16 pounds total--including my one week pre-op diet and I am THRILLED with that progress. I've had pneumonia...etc. so I have not focused at ALL on losing weight--just surviving and getting well---so seeing the scales dropped SO much is just SUCH a cool thing. I'm getting used to my new world of eating. I eat less than my six year old!!! We have gone out to restaurants as a family a few times, and I got the "is everything ok with your food, Ma'am? YOu havn't hardly eaten anything".....I'm sure there will be many more to come. This last time I just shared with my little girl -- the kid's meal. I have ULTIMATE restriction right now. But I know bandster hell is on it's way. I'm just loving being able to eat 1/2 cup of refried beans and feel completely full for hours. I haven't focused on protein, getting my water in, nothing like that. So, I am going to make a plan today of how to attack this next chapter...from now as I start feeling better to my first fill. My husband is making comments every day about how much weight I've lost--he can't believe it...and when I went to work yesterday the lady that NEVER says anything good said that she could tell I was sick, because "you have lost alot of weight". My hubby broke down and told my skinny MIL when I was so sick in the hospital the second time. (!!!!!!) So she came over and had to get the whole story. Why would I do it? What exactly did they do? She had to see all of my incisions. My incisions are almost completely healed. Thank God, that is the one part of this surgery that has been a breeze had has healed mutantly fast. My MIL could hardly find all five of them. The only one that looks like an incision is my port (when I went back into the hospital they put those hideously sticky heart monitor things smack over the top of my port incision. ????!!!! Not fun to take off, but it's ok now) I'm getting ready to walk on the treadmill for 30 minutes then make up some tuna salad for lunch. Probly be able to eat 1/2 cup of that! :redface:) I'm wasting SO much food. MIL did make me her awesome deviled eggs and those went down GREAT!!! My postop appt is July 7th at 1:00pm...I can't wait! Things are looking up! I'm SOOOO glad I have the band!

Hey, guys... Tomorrow is two week anniversary of getting banded!! I am down officially 16 pounds total--including my one week pre-op diet and I am THRILLED with that progress. I've had pneumonia...etc. so I have not focused at ALL on losing weight--just surviving and getting well---so seeing the scales dropped SO much is just SUCH a cool thing. I'm getting used to my new world of eating. I eat less than my six year old!!! We have gone out to restaurants as a family a few times, and I got the "is everything ok with your food, Ma'am? YOu havn't hardly eaten anything".....I'm sure there will be many more to come. This last time I just shared with my little girl -- the kid's meal. I have ULTIMATE restriction right now. But I know bandster hell is on it's way. I'm just loving being able to eat 1/2 cup of refried beans and feel completely full for hours. I haven't focused on protein, getting my water in, nothing like that. So, I am going to make a plan today of how to attack this next chapter...from now as I start feeling better to my first fill. My husband is making comments every day about how much weight I've lost--he can't believe it...and when I went to work yesterday the lady that NEVER says anything good said that she could tell I was sick, because "you have lost alot of weight". My hubby broke down and told my skinny MIL when I was so sick in the hospital the second time. (!!!!!!) So she came over and had to get the whole story. Why would I do it? What exactly did they do? She had to see all of my incisions. My incisions are almost completely healed. Thank God, that is the one part of this surgery that has been a breeze had has healed mutantly fast. My MIL could hardly find all five of them. The only one that looks like an incision is my port (when I went back into the hospital they put those hideously sticky heart monitor things smack over the top of my port incision. ????!!!! Not fun to take off, but it's ok now) I'm getting ready to walk on the treadmill for 30 minutes then make up some tuna salad for lunch. Probly be able to eat 1/2 cup of that! :thumbup:) I'm wasting SO much food. MIL did make me her awesome deviled eggs and those went down GREAT!!! My postop appt is July 7th at 1:00pm...I can't wait! Things are looking up! I'm SOOOO glad I have the band!