Born in Missouri

@myfanwymoi An incarcerated umbilical hernia doesn't play hide-n-seek. It hurts. You can't sit. You can't stand. You can't dance The Funky Chicken. You are in painville. I'm going to research Petersen's hernia some more. Thank you for some basic details, though. Let me guess. The incision that hurts is the furthest one on your left side.

Vent away, mckenzie. This is one of those irrational frustrations that you understand but you don't want to accept. That intermediate goal of "under-200lbs" is one most of us have dreamed about, and here you had to see your weight go above that goal. I'd look at it this way: the first time you drop below 200lbs is a happy day... and so, when you drop below 200lbs again, you get to enjoy another happy day. Two happy days are better than one happy day, right?

@macadamia Did everything work out okay? How long did you have to wait (after the procedure) before your friend's son got off work? Hope the procedure and the doctor's findings were good, too. I was impressed with the number of great suggestions you received. Something I figured out about this site from the beginning... the advice or someone's suggestion might not help the person asking, but someone else on the board is bound to benefit from the post.

I've made a conscientious effort to avoid using the word "love" when talking about food. "I love chicken wings. I love French fries. I love tacos. I love spaghetti." No more! I'm breaking off my love affair with food. We're just good friends now. But food keeps trying to win me back. "Give me another chance!" "No, Food. I'm moving on. There's someone else in my life now. Someone that I love more than I ever loved you -- myself, my health, my life." - What word will I use in place of "love"? Probably good ol' "like". "I like okra. I like shrimp. I like garden-fresh tomatoes. I like pecans." I'm also going to avoid using the word "hate". Hate gives Food more importance than it deserves. "I don't like pineapple. I dislike Brussels sprouts. I don't care for liver." - For me, it's easier to give up the word "love" rather than "hate". Not sure why.

@myfanwymoi. Thank you for posting this alert. I posted something recently (with similar warnings) and received a snippy reply from the poster. The person in question ate a big meal on day three of his post-op. He went on to justify his eating by saying that he had a stomach of steel. I hope that someone else will read my post and decide not to advance their diet. Rupturing one's suture line is serious business. I suppose some people are overly-sensitive when septicemia and death are mentioned. Then again, maybe I did come off as a tad preachy, but this post-op act wasn't something to be "proud" of. Made of steel indeed. Superman doesn't even have a stomach made of steel. I had an incarcerated umbilical hernia. It was not discovered during my surgery but it was every bit as critical to treat surgically posthaste.

Wow. I had an umbilical hernia, but it was an incarcerated umbilical hernia. I had to have surgery (a laparoscopic mesh repair) a couple of hours after I arrived in the ER. Incarcerated hernias can turn gangrenous if untreated. My husband is all about the "silent treatment". I've been married for 38 years.

Tell them that you're having metabolic surgery. They'll probably be too embarrassed to admit that they don't know what that is. And include that one of the "side effects" of your surgery is losing weight and maybe some hair loss. (The hair loss is for a little shock value). The best part is that this is all true. You are having metabolic surgery.

I'm post-op. I had my bypass on June 16, 2018. I've lost almost 44lbs so far. The rest of my stats are under my user pic.

@ GreenTealael I'm no longer able to walk or run for exercise. I've had a crippling condition for years that limits my mobility.

@insta_adventurer Yes! I cringe when I hear those words. Some people have no sense of boundaries. It's similar to women who've had a miscarriage, "Heaven wanted another angel." "Forget about it. You can try again." I applaud your academic achievement! My husband and I have spent half of our lives trying to help our children to get a good education. My husband is a university professor with a Ph.D. and two master's. Our daughter is a PharmD (Doctor of Pharmacy) and our two middle sons are both medical doctors. Our youngest son is a sophomore in college studying computer engineering. It took me 9 years to finish my bachelor of science degree because of all my pregnancies. I currently do something very, very different from what my B.S. is in. @insta_adventurer I didn't realize that you've already had your surgery. In a previous post, I asked some questions about your surgery date, etc. Kindly update your profile, your surgery status, and any other stats that you're comfortable including.

Yep, Frustr8... you're just too, too young to be anything other than an older sister to me. And you're a gem, too. Do you recall how we "met"? If I'm not mistaken, it was a post in which you brought up your memory of "syrup of figs".

@insta_adventurer It is extremely difficult to insert a bit of gentle humor into one's comment without being misunderstood. I obviously failed in sharing what I considered to be humor with you. Darn those emojis. They didn't help me out one bit. I am also obese. Actually, on all my medical records I'm classified as morbidly obese. Your profile is blank so I'll take your word for it that we are in the same group. Again, my attempt at humor did not go over well with you. I mentioned person-first language in my post because it's something that I recently encountered, so it's on my front burner. PFL is about respecting people by not labeling them with their diseases. Yes, it's just silly semantics to some, but it's also an interesting movement with heartfelt objectives. It's not my nature to be disrespectful or unkind to others. I would never be so pretentious. I'm sorry that you misread my poor, poor attempt at humorously mocking your words. Do you have a surgery date yet, insta adventurer? How far along are you in the pre-op process? Are you planning to have a sleeve done or a gastric bypass?

I don't know what to say. I have no appetite, not even for foods I once enjoyed. Why will your partner's departure tomorrow affect you so much? Are you afraid of losing control without him around? Which reminds me... if he's your support system, why did he order all of that Chinese food and eat it in front of you? Some harsher straight talk now, sir: Weren't you the least bit concerned about damaging your newly-jiggered works, specifically, your anastomosis? It could've ruptured! The anastomosis is the suture line where the stomach and the small intestine are stitched together. My surgeon told me that this is the last area to heal, and it certainly would not have been close to being healed when you ate all that Chinese food on day three. When the suture line ruptures or tears (this is called a "dehiscence of the anastomosis), your abdominal contents empties out into your peritoneal cavity. This is serious, SERIOUS stuff. After that, you risk dying within 24-48 hours. (Insert "dramatic chipmunk" music here). Your suture line was not firmly melded together and all that solid food could have done you in. I'm glad to hear that your dare-deviling ways are over and that you are back to cottage-cheesing it. I don't know if it's a macho thing to sound almost proud of doing what you did, but I'm glad that you didn't hurt yourself. You're lucky to be able to get in all of your fluids. I stink at getting enough protein, calories (less than 250), and fluid. Are you exercising?

@Frustr8 I doubt her friend would have had the strength to say all of that, Big Sister. (You're too young to be my mother.)

@insta_adventurer I think many of us can relate. The person you know you went to urgent care for urgent care was given a big dose of fat-shaming instead. I'm sure she got a prescription for antibiotics, too, but that doctor just couldn't see past her weight. And sometimes it seems that the care obese individuals receive is palliative in nature and not curative. Like the goal is to keep them comfortable because they’re basically as good as dead anyway. Brilliantly stated, insta, except for your crime of not using people-first language. My primary just retired. I adored her. She trusted me and I trusted her. Her replacement is a new, untested doctor who just finished her residency in family medicine. I have an appointment with her next week. I hope she's someone I can trust in the same way.

@nibble I can't believe that I beat the librarian at her own game. Feels good, nibble. Eat my dust. Better luck next time.

Here are several articles on the dangers of too much protein and not enough protein. Scroll down the page to read them all. Side Effects of High Protein Diets on the Skin & Eyes What Are Risks With Excessive Protein Intake? How Much Protein Is Right For You? How to Consume 100g of Protein per Day The Effects of Low Protein Intake What Happens if You Have Too Much Protein Intake? https://www.livestrong.com/article/542424-side-effects-of-high-protein-diets-on-the-skin-eyes/ Keratosis Pilaris is a very common follicular disorder characterized by the appearance of rough bumps on the skin. Primarily, it appears on the back and outer sides of the upper arms, but can also occur on thighs and buttocks. An excess of the protein known as Keratin accumulates within the hair follicles forming numerous tiny rough bumps on the skin. Sometimes, these bumps can become irritated causing the follicles to redden excessively and inflammation and irritation occur. http://askanaturopath.com/faqs/skin-rash/p/178

I can understand your reluctance to avoid making waves, but standing up for yourself is something you need to keep practicing. Apparently, this woman is too busy to do her job. Your surgery date is as important as anything else on her to-do list. You seem young. After enduring this treatment several more times (and I promise you this type of thing happens to us all), you'll realize that the courage to speak up for yourself is already inside of you... you just need to use practice using that courage. Maybe your efforts in being a self-advocate will seem clumsy at first, maybe your nerves will get the best of you and your words will fail you, but remember: YOU ARE A PERSON WHO MATTERS AND YOU SHOULD EXPECT TO BE TREATED AS A PERSON WHO MATTERS. Don't let anyone treat you differently. Speaking up for yourself doesn't mean that you need to get into a shouting match with others. Keep calm, keep your voice even but firm... and be polite. Sometimes phone conversations are taped. If that's the case, you want to appear as the person in control of your language and emotions. (A supervisor may want to review that tape.) Keep your emails. Get used to organizing a paper trail until it becomes second nature. Again, it takes practice. Some people never master self-advocacy. Perhaps your mother hasn't. Next time you're out and about, notice how others handle themselves in stressful situations. Look for hints about what you would do --or not do -- if you were in their shoes.

I found this comment on an old profile. Apparently, this person has not visited in a while. What should we infer? (Not a serious question.)

I'm glad that I buckled down and finished both knees. I was bone-on-bone with the first one, and almost there with the second. It wasn't easy, but it's behind me now. I don't regret having them done. I was placed in a live-in rehab facility for five days for my first knee. With the second, only one day in rehab. I was able to pass all of the PT's walking, bending, and stair-climbing tests and I was discharged from rehab. I then had a PT come to my home for about 6 weeks (2 days a week) to do various treatments, but I eventually "graduated" from those, too. Believe it or not, having the MTP joints in my big toes fused were the toughest surgeries because I wasn't allowed to walk or even stand for 6-8 weeks. I had to wheel around on a hotrod all-terrain scooter-- with a little wire basket in front! And because the surgeries were done separately, I had two different recovery periods of 6-8 weeks. Ah, the good ol' days...

Have you seen this study? Weight-Loss Surgery Tied to Major Benefits in RA: Disease activity improved and medication requirements fell https://www.medpagetoday.com/rheumatology/arthritis/52013 The original study: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/26018243

@Frustr8 Yep. Just another "attention-seeking, drug-seeking hypochondriac who needs to lose weight." Hey, I need to create an easier way to say my ER /doctor's office rant phrase... hm. ASDSH - who needs to lose weight Said out loud: ASDSH = "ASS-DISH who needs to lose weight." That's it, Frustr8, to doctors and other medical personnel: "We're ass-dishes who need to lose weight."

@ChaosUnlimited My problem isn't so much keeping it down or not being able to get in more at any one time, I just have no interest in eating. Appetite zero. That's not necessarily a bad thing, I suppose, especially for people who are at the opposite end of the spectrum: intense hunger. It does; however, interfere with the protein intake my body needs to do the high-intensity exercise you mentioned. I wonder if it's even possible to do high-intensity exercise without using one's legs or feet. It's always comforting to hear kind words from others. Isn't it strange how we always seem to know how to be understanding and patient with others, but rarely with ourselves? How many times on this forum have I cheered on someone else, yet when it comes to myself, I'm harsh and overly-judgmental.

Pregnancy and lactation were both incredible life-changing experiences that I treasure. I've given birth four times to four healthy children. Once you know you're pregnant, it's never too soon for your first prenatal visit. So much takes places during those early first weeks. Your vitamins sound fine, but this is really something for your obstetrician to confirm. Also, and don't be shy about asking, if s/he is knowledgeable about the special malabsorption issues associated with a bypass. You may need other medication prescribed for you during your pregnancy, so s/he'd need to know, for example, that extended-release medications no longer work for you. Azithromycin, a common antibiotic, is also out post-bypass. To make sure that you, and especially your baby, are properly nourished, be vigilant and be a strong self-advocate. Forgive my patronizing tone, but you know that what you do (or don't do) from now on, can affect that fragile precious life growing inside of you. NO PRESSURE, right? I should mention that I don't know the differences between a full gastric bypass and a mini-bypass, so I hesitate to say anymore ... other than GET THEE TO A BABY DOCTOR POSTHASTE!

My oldest daughter has ADD (no hyperactivity). We did not treat her with the conventional meds at the time. She is now a Doctor of Pharmacy... so academically she wasn't impacted. And now that she understands the pharmacology and the side effects of the meds used to treat ADHD, she's thanked us for not subjecting her to those drugs. (I'm not implying that all of the drugs used to treat ADHD are bad, but there's a big difference in treating an adult with such powerful medication vs a child. Also, it's been a while since my daughter was a young child. New drugs have been introduced, etc.) My daughter is not a binge eater either, but the correlation between untreated ADHD and binge eating certainly makes sense. Thank you for posting this info, George.