Sleeved36

Tealael is right, it could be the hormones.
This is a tough process in every way. Can make you want to change every area of your life.
Is your fiance a nice person that treats you well? If so, don't make any rash decisions.
However, if she is rude to you or others and you think you can do better . . . . Happy hunting!

As a rule, I'd probably avoid anything at starbucks, as they're probably INCREDIBLY high in sugar. I tried a thai iced tea at one point and...well....had to change my pants. Trust me, that sugar can be a really bad shock to your system, don't risk it.

Tiff, before you can get back on track, you're going to have to stop beating yourself up. The key is just to go back to "bariatric basics." Start logging again and concentrating on Protein. This is going to be a life long struggle for all of us so the key is using the tools at your disposal. Perhaps some bad foods magically crept back in. I began noticing this myself so I forced myself to go back to logging and I had the "A ha!" moment when I saw potato chips sneak back in. I think my calories also crept back up too but not to the point where I was gaining; just stagnant or plus or minus a few pounds.

Did I miss something? When did anyone say he was a dog?
OP: I just want you to think carefully before you do anything drastic. It would be terrible if you destroyed a good relationship bc you are in an emotional state postop. You might start dating again and realize she was wonderful.
But I don't know you or your fiance, maybe you guys breaking up is long overdue. Maybe she is toxic and negative person and you are better off without her.
Only you can decide . . . . We all deserve to be treated well, that goes for both you and her.

I was always shocked to see my fat pictures, 'lord am I fat or what!' 'I can't be THAT fat!'
Some of it is because I am agile, I move well and have some grace, so I 'think' I can 'fit' into that small space between things. Ha ha what an illusion that can be sometimes when that fat gut ended up with bruises from the attempt.
Oh @MIZ60, right there with you on asking the hubs to pick out the chick that I resemble weight wise lol - he squirms out of it by saying - shapes are different, your butt is not shaped like hers, you don't have arms like that, etc....BUT I seriously cannot 'see' what size I am...I hold up a shirt and think it won't fit and it does....I get amazed. I can hardly wait to see how I handle this at closer to goal weight.
And even weirder, I can shop for the teenage granddaughters at resale shops, and know what I pick up will fit them...I see their size just fine. Plus I freakin' sew garments, so why my brain can't see my body is stupifying! And mirrors are an illusion - how else could you see those 42" hips in the width of a 12" wide mirror?

I felt exactly like you did before surgery. I honestly did not think of myself as the size I actually was and it stunned me to see pictures that proved it. I avoided the camera for the last couple of years....
I did not develop weight issues until I was in my 40s--my RN job was physically active and as a nurse practitioner I did a lot of walking and occasional wrestling with kids to examine them . Once I started gaining weight I just bought bigger clothes but still did not make the mental connection.
Even now (and I have done this for years) I will ask my husband "Is that person the size I am/was" when we see an overweight woman. This aggravates him but he usually says "no she is bigger than you ever were". He told me last week to quit asking him that...
I am documenting my weight loss with monthly pictures....I still have a long way to go. All I see is a fat girl I do not really recognize. I have body dysmorphia.

Body Dysmorphia - I don't get it and yet I have it. I see many people comment after they've lost their weight that they still feel like the fat girl. That they still see a fat girl in the mirror. They wonder if people are staring at them as they shop in the regular section of the clothing stores because they still feel like they should belong in the plus section.
This baffles me. I'm not trying to be rude. Its just that as a preop sleever, I experience the total opposite. I'm a skinny girl trapped in a plus size body. I'm constantly looking in the mirror and wondering why my body looks like a bloated version of how I feel I am. I get mildly insulted when someone says something to me about being a big girl or a plus sized girl (even if they were totally being kind and not rude at all).
I joke to my friends that I'm trans-thin. I seriously CAN'T WAIT to get the body my mind thinks I belong in.
But I guess what I'm questioning now is: doesn't everyone getting the surgery feel the same as me? That was my assumption. Am I alone in feeling this way? And more importantly - a year from now is my brain going to switch to the opposite body dysmorphia in some cruel joke?

Tealael is right, it could be the hormones.
This is a tough process in every way. Can make you want to change every area of your life.
Is your fiance a nice person that treats you well? If so, don't make any rash decisions.
However, if she is rude to you or others and you think you can do better . . . . Happy hunting!

Tealael is right, it could be the hormones.
This is a tough process in every way. Can make you want to change every area of your life.
Is your fiance a nice person that treats you well? If so, don't make any rash decisions.
However, if she is rude to you or others and you think you can do better . . . . Happy hunting!

Can just be hormones ,or it can be she reminds you of the old you and you now have the urge to clean house so to speak. Sometimes we settle for who we think we deserve, then we want to move on when we think we can finally be allowed to deserve more. Really think about it before you do anything , don't rush. Think about the entire relationship then really talk to her. She deserves honesty if nothing more. Safe journey

Health promotion and maintenance is absolutely my role. More than half of my job at work is education.
It is condescending and rude of you to assume that you know my job description, nurses do all kinds of things. I have lots of other fancy letters behind my name besides RN that relate to my professional role, but that isn't the point for this forum.
I didn't think I would have to include all of my credentials to have a discussion about how people felt about weight conversations in a healthcare setting.

Woohoo....I can see a huge difference! But I agree with Sleeved 36...let’s see a smile! You have lots to smile about! 😁

I love the idea of a fecal transplant... But only for married people. Imagine the vows.
My $h!t will become your $h!t / Your $h!t will forever and always be my $h!t
Lol
VSG2017 HW 249 SW 238 CW 167

I was watching videos of live surgeries getting an idea of what my surgeon would be doing. When I had her put the band in back in 2011, I asked if she could get me photos of my insides... she looked at me like I had 12 heads. I see my outside all the time, I've never seen my actual insides, I told her.

Still didn't get my photos LOL.

Like the OP, I used to drink regularly - but not to excess. I love a drop of red, me.
However, as I think that's one of the reasons I ended up fat, I'm in no hurry to start it again.

Um, your response is incredibly rude. You don't know me AT ALL. How could you possibly get from my original post that I have an alcohol dependence problem?? I gave you ONE day of information and not even full information of what I ate, just the calories. I had white wine, on one night. Not a nightly thing at all. I've read a lot of your posts and they've always been friendly and you've always given good advice or feedback to questions. I'm truly shocked and disappointed by your judgmental response.

The issues regarding alcohol and WLS are the following:
Healing - alcohol is corrosive to the raw stomach tissues that have been exposed during surgery, so we need to keep away from it while the stomach heals. Surgeons differ in their opinion as to how long that should be, from a few weeks to a few months.
Liver health - starting out obese or worse, our livers are often in pretty poor shape (hence the "liver shrinking" pre-op diets that some surgeons impose). Further, our livers are further stressed by their role in metabolizing all that fat that we are losing, and doesn't need any further stress from ingesting a liver toxin like alcohol (that's not a moral judgement, just basic physiology.) Surgeons vary widely as to how much this bothers them depending upon their backgrounds and WLS philosophies (short term vs. long term.) In my doc's program, we are under contract to not drink as long as we are in a weight loss phase (call it a year, though ideally forever) - with his "sideline" as a liver transplant surgeon, he doesn't want any of his bariatric patients coming back onto his transplant table.
Transfer addiction - to the extent that we are/have been addicted to food (a very individual thing) that we can no longer satisfy, courtesy of our WLS, we can be prone to transferring those addictive tendencies to something else - alcohol, drugs, gambling, shopping, etc. So, a casual drinking habit pre-op can (and often does) morph into full blown alcoholism.

Hot & Spicy Cheez-Its are possibly my biggest weakness food. I could - and did more than once - empty a box in one session. Although I'm just now post-surgery, I already know they cannot be in my pantry, a "one time" snack choice or in any way part of my life.

Well, I bought a big box of 36 individual packets of Cheezits from Amazon and ate all of them in a 4 day period. Never again! I can not control myself with them.

A small experiment today that truly underscores the danger of slider foods!

Two and a half months post op and at this stage, I’m able to eat 1/3 to 1/2 of a cup of food at meal time. If I eat more, I get hiccups, start burping and feel uncomfortable. In need of an afternoon snack as I walked past the cracker aisle at the grocery store, I grabbed a box of Cheez-Its. Of course, I planned to eat half a serving at 75 calories or 14 small crackers. What a mistake! By the time I got home half the box was gone, and I didn’t feel that constricted or uncomfortable.

After seeing how much I ate of the box of crackers, I vowed to never open another box of crackers or bag of chips!

Please fill me in on your mistakes so I can avoid them in advance!

I avoided cheez-its for like, 7.5 months after surgery, but had some 2 weeks ago in an impulsive gas station buy on a road trip It was a 3 serving bag and I got through 2 servings without even realizing it! Never. Again. the cheez-its are BANNED!
I was so successful keeping them out of the house (those and other crackers are my "I will devour this whole bag/carton" type foods) and now I have to try harder to eliminate gas station stops--like packing a bag ahead of time for nutrition needs! Did that last roadtrip (after the cheez it meltdown) and was wickedly successful. Protein Shake and a yogurt if I needed one or both.
Otherwise...I don't think I've had any huge slider screw ups like that. Unless you count alcohol. there are sadly days where I drink my calories from bad things like that instead of eating real people food. #workinprogress anyone?

I wish! Pants are too big in the hips/thighs, but going down sizes isn't working bc my fat gut isn't shrinking as fast as the rest of me. 😥 Smaller sizes look great on my legs, but give me "muffin top". 😪
Remember that scene in the Nutty Professor movie when Eddie Murphy is going back and forth between fat and thin? That's how I feel.
What random part will shrink next? ?Certainly not my waist.

I have been too hungry to have Protein Shakes. I mean real hunger, not head hunger. I eat all of my Protein and the shakes are just added calories at this point.
I have one once in a while if I eat a lower protein meal (certain salads).
Sleeved may 9, down 33 lbs or so, not weighing in daily - too stressful 😬

I wish! Pants are too big in the hips/thighs, but going down sizes isn't working bc my fat gut isn't shrinking as fast as the rest of me. 😥 Smaller sizes look great on my legs, but give me "muffin top". 😪
Remember that scene in the Nutty Professor movie when Eddie Murphy is going back and forth between fat and thin? That's how I feel.
What random part will shrink next? ?Certainly not my waist.

I have been too hungry to have Protein Shakes. I mean real hunger, not head hunger. I eat all of my Protein and the shakes are just added calories at this point.
I have one once in a while if I eat a lower protein meal (certain salads).
Sleeved may 9, down 33 lbs or so, not weighing in daily - too stressful 😬