Machalo

Update: the dreaded conversation with my husband is likely to happen this weekend if I have the nerve to rock the boat. I hate confrontation and bringing up something like this feels like I'm confronting him with something he won't be happy about. But I have to let him know how his pointed disapproval and disinterest has hurt my feelings.
Wish me luck!

I'd also be interested as long as my budget could handle it.

Picked up the recommended book (it's free on Kindle Unlimited) and will order the workbook after Christmas. Really looking forward to this group.

Hi Brandy! Welcome welcome! Glad you found us. I look forward to getting to know you through the threads.

Hi Brandy! Welcome welcome! Glad you found us. I look forward to getting to know you through the threads.

My journey starts all the way back to my pre-teen years. I was a chubby little girl. At about 8-9, my Mom put me on my first diet. At 15, I took weight loss shots every week for two years. During High School I stopped eating and dropped weight and grew so that helped. By 17 and graduation, I was at a comfortable 125-130. I maintained it for the next 10 years by smoking and not eating. I didn't eat healthfully, but darn if I didn't eat slowly and chew my food to death.
Fast forward those ten years and I was 27, in one abusive relationship after the other, and became an exercise addict. I still didn't eat healthfully. but I ate so little that it didn't really matter what I ate.
Forward another two years and I was 29 and getting married to my true love. I still had very bad eating habits, and now I was faced with having to eat regular meals at regular times. ACK! I gained weight almost instantly, and it's been compounding for the last 26 years. I tried SlimFast, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Adkins, Mediterranean, and pretty much everything else. If I did lose some weight on them, I gained it all right back once I went off of them, plus more. I became a yo-yo dieter. The only thing that worked for me again was to stop eating. I could do a fast for about a day but by the second day my husband was on me to eat. Not that he didn't want a healthy wife, but I think he was afraid that I might turn out to have an eating disorder that was dangerous.
At 36 I moved to where we live now, kind of out in the country, with cities not too far away. Once I worked for the university I started to look into finishing my bachelor's degree. Which I did. In 2008, when I was 44. At that point I was so heavy that I couldn't stand myself and started looking into weight loss surgery. Husband and I both went in, listened to the seminar, got our first appointment out of the way, talked with the surgeon, talked with the insurance guy ... and never went back. Insurance was nigh unto impossible to get cleared back then. The hoops you had to jump through were prohibitive, so I dropped it. For then. I scheduled to do the seminar again in 2015 or so, and again the insurance hoops discouraged me. Plus other people discouraged me. So I stopped.
Now, I'm at my highest weight ever. I have GERD, sleep apnea, kidney problems, HBP, low thyroid, and joint pains. All from the excess weight. So I went back (3rd time's the charm, right?) and started the process over again. I've had my initial visit and labs done, I have scheduled the next 4 NUT appointments (thru Jan) and then the post-NUT assessment with the surgeon in January. Between this time and that, I need to get my psych clearance and have an ultrasound of my stomach done. Both are now scheduled. Now, I wait. It seems like it is taking forEVER, yet I only had my first appointment on the 8th. Not even 10 days yet and it feels like MONTHS have passed.
I've started cutting things from my diet -- all my bad habits. The first to go in October are candies, Cookies, fast food, and chips. i'm already down 7 pounds. Next month, I limit soda intake, and cut portions down to 2 cups per meal. November, I cut soda intake in half, cut my portions down to 1.5 cups per meal. December I go off the soda, drop my intake to 1 cup per meal and increase number of meals per day to 5. January, I'm hoping to be drinking my Water, and be at the point where I'm at 1/2 cup of food per meal and 5 meals per day. Hopefully I'll be able to have surgery in February depending on my surgeon's schedule, and my insurance to clear. They have lightened up on their requirements so I'm more hopeful that I'll be approved.
As far as who knows, my husband knows I went to my first appointment and that it is my goal to have bypass surgery. He's not super excited about it. In fact, I haven't been able to share any of my excitement or goal setting or anything with him. He is disabled and his health is frail, so he's been having his own issues. So, I bring my enthusiasm and my questions and my hyperactivity here to BariatricPal. You all have taught me so much already. Thank you.
I'd love to make some great friends here, and I think I will. If you'd like to make friends, send me a message or reply, or just feel free to add me. I'd love to start a conversation with other like minded folks, who are excited, learning a lot, questioning a lot, and are just generally addicted to this site. LOL. Seriously, though. I'd love to hear your story too.
Cheers,
Mac

I'd also be interested as long as my budget could handle it.

That is such great news! I can hear the excitement in your typing, and that is great too! My program is opposite yours. I do all the front work with the rest of the surgical team and get all my clearances before I get to meet with my surgeon. I guess it's so they can utilize the surgeon's time most effectively. Anyway, I'll get to see the surgeon at the end of January after my last weigh in for insurance.
I'm super excited for you! Keep us posted on how things are going.

Loved seeing all the before and after photos. You all are amazing! This is a great motivation and inspiration tool for when the journey seems tough. Mikeyy, keep up the great work, mate, you're looking incredible!

My plan to try to avoid some "saggage" is to increase my pectoral exercises. I have no idea whether that will help, but I figure it certainly can't hurt. I can't imagine having someone say that to me either. If she wasn't joking, and since you've not come back to say she was, I'll assume she wasn't, I have to wonder what kind of friend she really is.
Is she a work friend or a home friend? I find work friends tend to think they know me so much more than they actually do, and home friends, usually have the tact not to say something like that. Either way, I'm sorry you had to go through that hurtful statement.

So glad to hear that you are doing better. I was worried that something bad had happened, and I guess it kind of did since you had to be hospitalized for dehydration. i'm glad that your bodily functioning is getting back on track and that you feel more like yourself. Feel free to rant on here, seek advice, get motivation, etc. We're all just here trying to get through our journeys as best we can, supporting each other along the way.

Congratulations, Mike. Well done on your continued weight loss and on keeping to your plan. Your example inspires me to keep going on my pre-surgery weight loss even though it is a holiday week here in the US. I can overcome it. Blessings to you.

Congratulations, Mike. Well done on your continued weight loss and on keeping to your plan. Your example inspires me to keep going on my pre-surgery weight loss even though it is a holiday week here in the US. I can overcome it. Blessings to you.

My plan to try to avoid some "saggage" is to increase my pectoral exercises. I have no idea whether that will help, but I figure it certainly can't hurt. I can't imagine having someone say that to me either. If she wasn't joking, and since you've not come back to say she was, I'll assume she wasn't, I have to wonder what kind of friend she really is.
Is she a work friend or a home friend? I find work friends tend to think they know me so much more than they actually do, and home friends, usually have the tact not to say something like that. Either way, I'm sorry you had to go through that hurtful statement.

My plan to try to avoid some "saggage" is to increase my pectoral exercises. I have no idea whether that will help, but I figure it certainly can't hurt. I can't imagine having someone say that to me either. If she wasn't joking, and since you've not come back to say she was, I'll assume she wasn't, I have to wonder what kind of friend she really is.
Is she a work friend or a home friend? I find work friends tend to think they know me so much more than they actually do, and home friends, usually have the tact not to say something like that. Either way, I'm sorry you had to go through that hurtful statement.

Hi @Nomorepasta!
You raised an issue that I also have had with my husband. He was very concerned 1) that I could do it on my own; 2) that the surgery wasn't safe, and 3) I was too old to have it safely. So, I pussyfooted around him for a while, quietly sticking to my shakes and my plan and did some research. There is research out there that shows that people over 50 are now viable surgical candidates for WLS and that we do very well with it. The complications that my husband was concerned about don't happen much anymore. When confronted with facts, and my determination, his tune has changed.
I had to change my mindset though first. The surgery is for me, so that I can be healthy. I don't want to die of a comorbidity in the next 10 years; I'd like to see my grandchildren grow up. Most importantly, I really, truly wanted his support, but I was having the surgery anyway, regardless. That mindset was quite hard to put in place, mainly because I'm a pleaser and I go with pretty much everything he wants most of the time. I don't put my foot down very often, but I had to this time. Finally, I had to be selfish in my healthcare. I look after his health the best I can (he is disabled), but have ignored my own healthcare for a lot of years and it shows. Now is my time.
I'm happy to report that he has finally come around and is supporting my decision, even though he still has some reservations. All the best to you. Keep on reading the threads here, they were very encouraging when my spouse was not. ((Hugs))

Thanks for the referral, @sidvicious, I will take a look at the book. Maybe it will help both me and hubby. Right now I'm working through Bariatric Mindset Success, which is fabulous.

Congratulations on your super progress! Keep up the great work and thanks for keeping us posted.

I'm so glad your surgery was successful @LadyVS and that you are on the mend. I'm sorry to hear about your pain, I hope that it fades quickly, and I share your excitement about the future. You are going to rock this one! ((HUGS))

I've also been modifying my food intake since I started this journey. Each month I'm eliminating something from thje diet that I shouldn't have - like candy, Cookies, chips, and fast foods. Next month I will not only add another food item in there (limiting soda), but I'll also start portion controlling. All of this so that when I do finally get to the point of surgery, I can focus on the recovery and not on insane cravings. Plus, I know that they don't have to be forever deletions, just a majority of the time deletion. As long as I can tell my brain "not now, maybe later" that seems to satisfy the craving most of the time.

Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings and experiences, @Darktowerdream! You are very brave. For a minute I was wondering how you got into my head, LOL! I don't know that I could be that brave to show all my emotions and thoughts and such. While I don't have the same struggles that you do, I know we all have our own paths to walk, and I wish you all the best!
You said, We just can’t give up when the going gets rough. That hits me where I live because life is rough a lot of the time. I figure if it is calm I'm not growing. Since I love to learn and am a permanent student, I don't mind stretching a little here and a little there. It's when the stretching is like pulling a rubber band to the breaking point that I mind.
You have done an awesome job with your weight loss with your challenges. I will look back on your post when I need a pick-me-up and refocus. You are an inspiration, keep up the great work. ((HUGS))

So glad to hear you are doing well and that you are going home! I'm so excited for your next steps as you heal and get into the recovery side. ((HUGS))

Oh I hope so for you @jlb8080! All the best!

I understand your frustration, @KMB1218. It stinks when you're ready in your mind to have it done and you still have months to go before insurance will say it's good to go. But hang in there. The months will pass by, and think, it gives you more time to prepare emotionally and mentally for the changes coming.
BTW, Welcome Welcome

Thanks @jib8080. I will keep that in mind for next time I get sick. Which hopefully won't be again this flu season. *knock wood*