teacherlady2133

So much room in the bath tub..
I also do the handicap dressing room and go to the women sizes first. Size 30 to a 12 is a shocker..4x to a medium.
Passing people in the halls in the school building afraid I am in the way..
Sitting next to people in meetings.. Instead of on the outside so I don't take up too much table space..
Not having to ask people to stand up so I can get in around them. I still say excuses me and I am sorry and I am not even close to them.
sleeping next to my husband in bed.. Without having to have hundreds of pillows to be comfortable.. Never thought a king bed would feel too big!!

I got a reality check this weekend.. I was trying on clothing and wasn't happy about the fit and started complaining to my 14 year old daughter and she was "like really mom! You're not going to become like oh I am so fat! Stop complaining you're a size 12/14... You are smaller than a lot of woman." Then I look at my 14 year old daughter who is sitting there a 6ft tall, a size 18 thought how upsetting..to hear me complain about size when she has such a hard time fitting in... Oh worst mom moment ever!!!
Going to find contentment, so I can model contentment and self love...

197.....so 10 pound loss.. Missed goal by 7.. Hopefully weight loss isn't slowing too much down and more about bad choices.. Would like to Celebrate 10 pounds gone.. And being in the 100's first time in 25 years!!!

197.....so 10 pound loss.. Missed goal by 7.. Hopefully weight loss isn't slowing too much down and more about bad choices.. Would like to Celebrate 10 pounds gone.. And being in the 100's first time in 25 years!!!

10 months out and first can't believe you said that moment. Went to a baby shower and first time I saw people since surgery. I was expecting reactions but, my Aunt looked at me and said" do you wear contacts? "Yes I do" are they colored? No.. Wow your eyes are really blue.. I guess having weight on you hides all your good features" ??? How to react??? My daughters and mom was sitting there speechless...then after that comment she wanted to chit chat about by experience mentally...needless to say I finished the conversation politely and then had my own WTF look...
People can be so rude!!!

197.....so 10 pound loss.. Missed goal by 7.. Hopefully weight loss isn't slowing too much down and more about bad choices.. Would like to Celebrate 10 pounds gone.. And being in the 100's first time in 25 years!!!

Got to love children.... I was told can't believe how flexible you are now mom. You can crawl into a ball in chairs. I hadn't noticed but I like sitting with my legs up tight to my chest.. Big change to have my knees to my chest...

Oh my I have the same thoughts about mirrors.. I have put makeup on and think wow I look good, then take a photo and I do not look like what I saw in the mirror... So I agree photos are it...I have a story about photos.. When I first was losing weight I took a picture of myself and was shocked how thin I looked.. So I asked my son is this what everyone else is seeing? He at first laughed then said yea mom it is a photo if you... Got to love 15 year olds!!

I agree with never seeing myself as fat I was just bigger than everyone else and that was life. I think since I was a child it was the case so never so it clearly. I have lost a whole person too and to think of it that way is shocking...

I constantly ask my husband if I am hurting him sitting so close or leaning on him. That was my fear before and still is.. He laughs...Said never hurt before and now "Why would I even think that"

So much room in the bath tub..
I also do the handicap dressing room and go to the women sizes first. Size 30 to a 12 is a shocker..4x to a medium.
Passing people in the halls in the school building afraid I am in the way..
Sitting next to people in meetings.. Instead of on the outside so I don't take up too much table space..
Not having to ask people to stand up so I can get in around them. I still say excuses me and I am sorry and I am not even close to them.
sleeping next to my husband in bed.. Without having to have hundreds of pillows to be comfortable.. Never thought a king bed would feel too big!!

My youngest is 11 and I also told her the truth. Needed surgery to help me be healthy and do more stuff with her. She is so supportive and constantly saying how nice it is to hug me or sit with me. At first she watched everything I put in my mouth and would comment are you allowed? I think years of watching me eat unhealthy she didn't know what healthy food looked like for me to eat. I will tell you at first she thought I was coming home thin from hospital had to really talk about what the surgery was gong to do. Even watched videos and looked at the packets my dr gave... Did that with all of my kids 15,13,11...

Ok, here I am down from 350 to 197 over 150 gone.. Sizes are amazing when looking at numbers size 12/14 from a 30/32 and medium from a 4x..Off all medication, except vitamins... Why can't I see it? I see just a shrunk up me.. I see rolls lots of them.. I love spanx..if I could I would sleep in them.. Not just for the look but the feel of my body being tight..
My goal weight was 180, I think my bones are made of steel! I am 5'8, turning 38, with 3 c-sections and over weight since I was 12...I am 9 months post-op from WLS.
I keep thinking loving myself the way I did at 350 has really messed up my body vision..what and how should I feel about myself now.. Do I learn to love me how I am, or should I be judging myself hard, so I keep pushing to make more and more changes...but the question is change into what? I mean the damage being over weight created on my body just isn't going away and now I am a super model...I think that is my problem... I want something to compare too and everyone is so different and has different background stories..
I am driving my family nuts when I ask if I am so and so size, or am I as small as her? Does this go away?

So much room in the bath tub..
I also do the handicap dressing room and go to the women sizes first. Size 30 to a 12 is a shocker..4x to a medium.
Passing people in the halls in the school building afraid I am in the way..
Sitting next to people in meetings.. Instead of on the outside so I don't take up too much table space..
Not having to ask people to stand up so I can get in around them. I still say excuses me and I am sorry and I am not even close to them.
sleeping next to my husband in bed.. Without having to have hundreds of pillows to be comfortable.. Never thought a king bed would feel too big!!

10 months out and first can't believe you said that moment. Went to a baby shower and first time I saw people since surgery. I was expecting reactions but, my Aunt looked at me and said" do you wear contacts? "Yes I do" are they colored? No.. Wow your eyes are really blue.. I guess having weight on you hides all your good features" ??? How to react??? My daughters and mom was sitting there speechless...then after that comment she wanted to chit chat about by experience mentally...needless to say I finished the conversation politely and then had my own WTF look...
People can be so rude!!!

10 months out and first can't believe you said that moment. Went to a baby shower and first time I saw people since surgery. I was expecting reactions but, my Aunt looked at me and said" do you wear contacts? "Yes I do" are they colored? No.. Wow your eyes are really blue.. I guess having weight on you hides all your good features" ??? How to react??? My daughters and mom was sitting there speechless...then after that comment she wanted to chit chat about by experience mentally...needless to say I finished the conversation politely and then had my own WTF look...
People can be so rude!!!

10 months out and first can't believe you said that moment. Went to a baby shower and first time I saw people since surgery. I was expecting reactions but, my Aunt looked at me and said" do you wear contacts? "Yes I do" are they colored? No.. Wow your eyes are really blue.. I guess having weight on you hides all your good features" ??? How to react??? My daughters and mom was sitting there speechless...then after that comment she wanted to chit chat about by experience mentally...needless to say I finished the conversation politely and then had my own WTF look...
People can be so rude!!!

2/9/15-wt 199

My youngest is 11 and I also told her the truth. Needed surgery to help me be healthy and do more stuff with her. She is so supportive and constantly saying how nice it is to hug me or sit with me. At first she watched everything I put in my mouth and would comment are you allowed? I think years of watching me eat unhealthy she didn't know what healthy food looked like for me to eat. I will tell you at first she thought I was coming home thin from hospital had to really talk about what the surgery was gong to do. Even watched videos and looked at the packets my dr gave... Did that with all of my kids 15,13,11...

Corn, I want to eat it all the time..
And rice... But no rice for me each time(3times) it was a mess.. Pain, hurt, vomit..

Michiganchic, the laugh was just the OH-IO..
I truly loved your post and you are so right about how we measure success in life and things we do. I think sometimes reality checks are needed to keep us focused.. What is healthy and right for our own life? We get caught in the comparing and miss the reality...we quickly lose our faith and drive when we compare...and trying to obtain something we really don't need... I need to be healthy... I love the idea of making a list and even getting out some old photos..

when i first looked inside myself, ( introspection not surgically) i realized that i never saw myself as fat, one of the coping mechanisms is our mind trick us into just being ourselves, not a fat person. Sure we feel the weight etc and the results of it, but the changes while i can see it in clothing sizes, in energy level, in health, but you stilll feel like you and you always will because who else can you be? I do believe in the side by side picture thing. My wife keeps a pic of me from went i graduated after going back to school two years ago when i was at my heaviest and we splice in a pic of me now, so i can see the true difference. i do notice it in my face, at first i thought, who is this guy its nt me, but i do like him. so i get used to it. and i look forward to meeting the skinny me inside this guy. When my surgeon told me my weight loss goal, ( down to 170 pounds from 374 , he said " you're going to lose a whole person, and since he isnt paying rent, lets kick him out." it was meant as a joke, but it was very perceptive. We do lose a whole person in becoming the new us.

I can relate @@teacherlady2133 ! it's hard to keep the new visuals of our bodies in perspective or reality, and what may be happening is that it's such a big change it's overwhelming you. I'd encourage you to go back to any journals or notes you made pre-op or early on, and ask yourself what's changed since then. If you don't have those, just start making some lists of things that are different in your life now. It helps pain a more complete picture of life, instead of so much on how we look and what size we are. Also, write a page of "I am..." statements. Not only about the changes but about the things that are you no matter what size or health or weight. "I am articulate, I am determined, I am strong, I am kind, I am a caring wife/mother/sister/daughter...etc. and then include the ones that are new among them; I am healthy, I am active, I am a runner, I am a gym rat...you get the idea. Keep the list and add to it as you grow and change. (Grow emotionally of course!) Consider looking also for a support group, since i've found just being with others going through it helpful, AND seeing others whose bodies change as mine has gives me good markers and encouragement. Good luck - and good for you thinking about loving yourself in this!!
Kate

I have the same thoughts and would ask my DH to point out someone my size, he stated firmly, "not happening!" But I did find a really great site that has helped me a lot with pics of different sized people. You put in your stats like height and weight, you can do pant size, body shape, age, etc. mybodygallery.com

So much room in the bath tub..
I also do the handicap dressing room and go to the women sizes first. Size 30 to a 12 is a shocker..4x to a medium.
Passing people in the halls in the school building afraid I am in the way..
Sitting next to people in meetings.. Instead of on the outside so I don't take up too much table space..
Not having to ask people to stand up so I can get in around them. I still say excuses me and I am sorry and I am not even close to them.
sleeping next to my husband in bed.. Without having to have hundreds of pillows to be comfortable.. Never thought a king bed would feel too big!!