Canary Diamond

joatsaint - thanks for the singalong! I really hope you're one of my YouTube subscribers....I can tell you will leave awesome comments libearzmom - come to the daaaaaaarrrrrk side... thank you for the congrats. I named him Bob. Because that's what he loved to do *sniffle*

OK so here's what I went with (FA = Future of America, M = Me): FA: Ms. Diamond, how was your surgery? M: I'm feeling fine, thank you! FA: What did you have surgery on? M: Oh, I had some things removed. It's kinda gross and you don't want to know about it. FA: OK. (pause) What did you have removed? Your eyeballs? Can you see us? Are those fake eyeballs? Yeah, I think one's falling out! M: No. FA: But really, what did you have removed? M: My testicles That shut 'em up.

Thank you everyone for your helpful advice. Except you, Arts137. Smartass. I'm only with these kiddos for another week (I don't teach with the regular school district anymore), so chances are they won't see any big changes. Also, it's entirely possible they're too wrapped in their ultra-meaningful little lives to even remember to ask me about it.

Check out my latest video for this exciting announcement! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXurQmN6IXE

Why thank you, Teresa! Your expectations of me are clearly too high.

During which week of the post-op diet is foot on the menu? I'm teaching a summer chemistry class to adorable little teenagers. My post-op week we were using small, round candies (not using names - don't want to trigger anyone) to represent atomic particles during radioactive decay. Of course, they could eat whatever they weren't using. At the beginning of class, seeing the HUGE and numerous bags of candy on my demo table, they asked if we were going to be doing something with them for that day's class (they are masters of deduction - watch out, Dr. House!) and I joked that it was all for me. Fast forward to the end of class, as they're cleaning up/inhaling their candy like Dysons. One of them asks if I'm going to have any and I reply, "Nah, I have surgery next week and I'm on a liquid diet." WAY TO GO, BIG MOUTH. Of course, they wanted to know more. I joked that I would tell them about it afterwards. That way If I died on the table they could make up whatever story they wanted ("Did you hear Ms. Diamond had a brain aneurysm and farted out her spleen???"). Well, I didn't die (thanks a lot, Dr. Illan), so now I'm in a pickle. I have no idea what to say if they ask me about it in class today. Do I lie and say I was just trying to crash diet before my beach/wedding/girls' weekend vacation? Or do I go the evasive route and imply it's gross and personal and they wouldn't want to know? I know some of you are wondering why I don't just tell them the truth. I'm sure when I'm 50+ pounds down and everybody's asking, my attitude may be different, but as of now the only people I've told are my immediate family and therapist. Something tells me that revealing my very personal secret to a room full of Tweeting teenagers may not be the best way to maintain an ounce of decorum in this very small town. Any fellow foot-eaters who can offer follow-up advice?

Yay for you! BTW - blogs don't always have to be informational to be beneficial to others (or yourself). I've found that sometimes even those blogs that are basically online diaries can be helpful, simply because others can identify with them and feel comforted that they are not alone in their feelings of insecurity, confusion, etc. Looking forward to keeping up with you!

Hey everybody! I just learned how to make a video with my computer and post it on "The Internet". It's very high-tech and I wouldn't want to intimidate any of you technophobes out there. I am just BLAZING into the last quarter of the 20th century! Anyway, I will be chronicling my weight loss journey for all to see. if you'd like to check it out, I'm pretty sure my channel name is "Canary Diamond". I don't know the difference between the member name and channel name, but I'm sure you'll figure it out - you smarty pants, you! Oh, even better. Here's a link (that's short for hyper-link in technology lingo, but again, I don't want to bore you with my exhaustive knowledge of what we early adopters call the "world wide web"): http://www.youtube.c...JUTmAKTCP8BLOwQ Check it out, and subscribe if you like it!

I swore to myself I wouldn't be one of those posters who whines about ONLY losing ______ pounds. "I lost 52 pounds the first two months, but only 12 this month. I was really hoping to weigh less than my cat by now. " Well, I'm whining. It's a week after surgery and I've lost 2 pounds. While I'm sure this is not uncommon, I can't seem to find any supporting evidence to that end. Stalls seem to make their first appearance, for the most part, in the second and third weeks after surgery. Also, I'm full of gas. More gas than I had two days after surgery. I can't seem to take a sip of anything without swallowing three times as much air. And it won't come out. If I tied a basket to my feet, I could probably give balloon rides over the breathtaking Oregon coast (note to self: possible future career?). I'm just crabby. Nothing's working the way it should and everyone else is to blame. I keep having these practice confrontations with make-believe opponents in which I am angrily defending myself in imaginary scenarios. These things that haven't happened are making me very upset. And my mom moved my $h!t around while I was in Mexico. And did my laundry (which was a very nice thing to do, but also implies my incompetence, right?). And bought the wrong kind of yogurt. And I don't want to take Anatomy and Physiology from that @$$ho!e who won't let me change lab times, even though my schedule only permits me to take the online class but not the online class's lab. Oh, it's my responsibility to free my schedule up so you don't have to deal with the grading "nightmare", as you put it, of dealing with students in labs they aren't registered for? I suppose I should apologize for being the ONE student at Southwestern Oregon Community College who's ever gone for her second Master's? (statistic not confirmed) Really, Mr. "I don't even have a Master's! Just a Bachelor's in Biology and a f**king chiropractic certificate"!!! SERIOUSLY???? Maybe I just won't become a nurse practitioner. That'll show him. And this website won't even let me curse. I have to use fµck¡n8 §Ymb@[$!!! First Amendment, anyone? And my dog is stinky.

How exciting! Congratulations!

Thanks, OP! I'm looking forward to trying these as soon as I'm able to eat solids!

What a victory - good for you! You also have a special victory in your supportive family. Your boys cheering you on through a workout is so sweet it brings tears to my eyes. Keep jogging your way to onederland!