measureofme

Me, Dr Kelly and my mother after my leak test at Angeles. He and his wife are both very warm, huggy people. A lot of Drs in the states barely touch you but they are the type to naturally put their arm on your shoulder and talk to you close together. I love that. It tells me a lot about a health care practitioner or person in general.

This is a great thread! I've laughed pretty hard the last few minutes reading through it.
One I have not seen anyone post yet (may have missed it though)...
"The higher your starting BMI, the faster you will lose."
BUNK. Pure BUNK. Every body is different. I mean, I'm thrilled to be down 76lbs at just shy of three months post op... but where would I be if I had not had my five/six week stall?! I'll just keep following the program and be glad the trend is DOWN the scale.

This is a great thread! I've laughed pretty hard the last few minutes reading through it.
One I have not seen anyone post yet (may have missed it though)...
"The higher your starting BMI, the faster you will lose."
BUNK. Pure BUNK. Every body is different. I mean, I'm thrilled to be down 76lbs at just shy of three months post op... but where would I be if I had not had my five/six week stall?! I'll just keep following the program and be glad the trend is DOWN the scale.

That the sleeve will automatically make you have an aversion to (or throw up) chocolate and unhealthy food!
Unless my sleeve starts jumping out and slapping that **** outta my hand its still very possible to eat and enjoy

That's awesome if its not much. I'll remember gum I got out of surgery about 6pm pt and already feel so much better today so I imagine tomorrow will keep getting better. Ice chips are going down well

Its about 2 oz maybe a bit more. (Its gastrograffin) Dr. Kelly doesn't use barium because it can cause problems if it were to leak into the body cavity. Gastrograffin would absorb. It does taste horrid. But swallow it quickly, and have the SF gum ready for when its over. U got this Good luck and congrats!

I'm gonna jump in on this one because, in my philosophy, for many of us it's a bigger picture issue.
I had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Not a personality change, not a lobotomy.
If my obesity is part of a larger mental health issue, then the Sleeve is just half of the answer. Some folks don't know that they have addiction/personality disorder components as part of their diagnosis. Or have some amount of denial. So, they go into the procedure with only half the solution at hand. They can hear/see the formula and "know" the way the lifestyle works... but if they're not addressing the addiction/personality side of it because they don't realize or don't acknowledge it, then it stands to reason old habits will TRY to be retained.
I will freely admit and discuss that, for me, obesity resulted from a life of addiction/mental health disorder. I was damn lucky that my Sleeve Journey started with years of counseling and culminated in a watershed moment where I knew I had to change and needed help to do it. Not everyone for who the story is similar has that resource or insight. I know that without my small army of professionals, family and friends supporting me, I'd probably be asking the same questions you're frustrated by. I often wonder what the support of those asking these questions is like.
Is it frustrating to see folks posting freely about wanting to "cheat"? Yep. Is it SCARY how soon some folks push the envelope? Totally. Do I wonder what is in their minds? All the time. Do I want to shake them and aks why they bothered? Ohmygosh yes!
But then, I think about my own heart and how many times in my 9 weeks post op I've had a (albeit much quieter) demon on my shoulder telling me how good that toast would taste, how a "little piece" of this or that won't hurt me, just ONE will not make the scale go up. How many times in my 9 weeks post op I've failed to follow the program by not getting enough water/protein/exercise... giving in to the demon in my brain on a few occassions.
I guess my point is, I feel ya AmandaRae. Completely. But as a person who is struggling, I'd just ask for those who want to "tell it like it is" to do so, but add a dash of compassion into it too- the person asking about bread/chinese food/eating "normally" may not have half their own story solved or it may be winning them over for the moment. Shall I prepare for the flames now? Or perhaps I've just killed another thread?

I'm having surgery with Dr Kelly Monday. I find it amusing how everyone believes that these other surgeons in Mexico have had no deaths. Pull your head out of the sand. The mortality rate for a bariatric surgery excluding the band is 1 in 400. If you truly believe that Dr Aceves or Alvarez have had no deaths you are in major denial. If they have preformed thousands of surgeries they have had deaths. Sure they don't advertise it, but the only reason people know about Dr Kelly's death of a patient is because the deceased patient befriended a member of the boards and they posted it. ALM wouldn't know about a death. I seriously can't believe how many people believe their surgeon who has preformed thousands of surgeries haven't experiences major complications and death in the riskiest population of all. You seriously believe that?
ALM takes thousands of dollars from a surgeon for each booking forcing them to perform more surgeries. If I was a surgeon that has performed almost 7,000 surgeries, has the FACS designation, the American College of Bariatric Surgeons approval/membership I wouldn't pay someone thousands of dollars to schedule me either.
Regardless of whom you choose, do you use a coordinator to schedule with your PCP, cardiologist, ect here in the states. Does your Dr pay someone thousands of dollars to a coordinate and hunt heads? Nope. I've worked in healthcare for a long time and with very few exceptions all of the surgeons I know work in ONE hospital.
I spent a long, long time researching surgeons. I even tried to trick his scheduler Lora into suggesting another surgeon to make sure she wasn't a coordinator. So far it has been a wonderful experience and I have no reason to believe the rest of the experience will be anything but.
Well, my surgery is Monday. My BMI is 49.9 so I could use all the prayers and thoughts that I can get because surgery in my condition is plain risky.

SirenSiren:
I just returned from Mexico on Sunday night after having my procedure done with Dr. Kelly. Two weeks prior to my surgery I received a phone call from Sandy at A Lighter Me who said she could not, in good conscience, refer any more patients to Dr. Kelly. That's quite a bomb to drop on a patient about to have surgery! Her conversation was very similiar to the one you heard only she told me he had knicked a couple of patients. Really? Where are these patients? Why hasn't anyone come forward to tell the story? If I had had a terrible experience after my surgery you can bet I'd be back on this forum to warn others. I wouldn't just sit idly by while he did damage to another patients. So I told her I needed time to digest what she was trying to tell me and asked for a refund, which I received the next day. I searched for and obtained Dr. Kelly's direct line and called him and re-scheduled my surgery directly with him. I am one week post-op and I couldn't be happier. Here's why:
Dr. Kelly uses florence Hospital and the Lucerna Hotel. A Lighter Me books you at Mi hospital and Mi Pueblo Amigo. Two HUGE differences. Granted, the hospital is old, but it's clean and the nurses are kind, careful, clean and caring. Mi Pueblo Amigo is a smoke-filled stinky casino just over the border - and I mean immediately over. The Lucerna was wonderful. Clean rooms, excellent restaurant, very accommodating staff. Just a very nice experience. I met another forum pal who had her surgery just 2 hours prior to mine. We had rooms at the hospital and at the hotel across from each other. She is also doing extremely well post-op - we email each other three times a day. We came to the same conclusion when comparing notes: Dr. Kelly keeps his patients well hydrated for two and a half days. We were given four things in our IV's twice a day: a pain killer, an antibiotic and two other things I can't remember. Other docs do not. Patients complaining of nausea and pain are probably in that state because they did not receive the same treatment that we got from Dr. Kelly. He knows what he's doing. You can read these forums all day and all night, but you're going to wind up with the same conclusion: Dr. Kelly is one of the best. Even Dr. Alvarez doesn't keep his patients two days in the hospital I don't think. There are several youtube videos of his patients and I could be wrong, but I thought they showed the patients leaving after only 1 1/2 days. He's another doctor I'd go to though.
Sandy tried to pursuade me to use Dr. Garcia or Dr. Zapata. Evidently she had a falling out with Dr. Kelly. I didn't ask him what happened, nor do I care. But it seems to be getting out of hand. Even my driver on the way home said he had heard about it.
So take what A Lighter Me is telling you and just disregard it. The coordinators are very competitive. If you prefer to use a coordinator - I'd use Trish. My friend booked thru her and was very happy with her. I met her and she even assisted me.
Please let me know if you have any specific questions and I'd be more than happy to answer them for you.
Dr. Kelly is a true professional. I had zero pain, zero nausea and zero gas.
Andrea

I emailed several coordinators too and was told they no longer work with Dr Kelly. They never mentioned safety issues. From all the boards I have visited it appears to be business related as with all the bad mouthing between coordinators. I booked directly with Dr Kelly and have no concerns. I've spoken to him on the phone several times. He didn't even require a deposit as he said I could bring him the money on the day of surgery. I have surgery this Wednesday, January 25th. I've been reviewing these boards for a while but never responded until this week looking for surgery buddies. There is so many scandulous posts, so yes....it's hard to believe everything you read. I would much rather refer someone to a surgeon that I already used instead of referring her to someone else based on what you read.

Glad to have given you some insight Amy. The journey really does start before you ever pick a doctor. Going the self-pay Mexico route does add some extra thoughts to the planning, but for some its the only way and quite viable with research and full disclosure of risk and reward. Good luck to you!

Dr. Kelly came to visit and his bedside manner and passion was all that I’d been told to expect. He had some hard, honest words for me… telling me that what we were doing was extreme surgery due to my size but that it he’d do all he could to make it a tool I could count on. He and the surgical team had conferred and I’d be in and out of anesthesia as fast as possible, though I was otherwise healthy he did not want to take a chance. He was quick to add that he’d not sacrifice doing the procedure 100% correctly and with care for speed, but this is why I choose him. His many years of doing the VSG could allow him to be faster and safer. I was set to go into the OR at about 9am the next morning. I had a good cry when he left. It’s hard to hear that your body is qualifying for “extreme” surgery and how had I come to this… but the peace in my bones, that this was right for me, was still there.
I’d been given a mild sleeping pill after Dr. Kelly left me but I woke naturally at about 5am. They’d wanted me up at 5.30 to shower and be ready for the IV to go in at 6 am and the rest of the pre-op tests to start. Sure enough… 6am sharp the nurse came in to place the IV. The first two attempts were awful. I even made my very tough MIL turn green as she held my hand. I have weak and rolling veins, combined with being nervous, it was a battle. I heard the nurses conferring in the hall how to do this better for me. They got creative and filled a glove with hot Water and put that on my other hand for about ten minutes. My shy veins reveled in the heat and were nice and perky now. The third attempt was fast and not so bad and successful. Whew! I was next taken for my chest X-Ray (clear!) and the cardiologist came in to do an EKG, also normal. Every doctor/nurse/specialist was surprised I was not diabetic, hypertensive or had any other disorder.
At about 9:15am they came to get me on the gurney for the OR. I was honestly terrified and had every last moment thought you could imagine. Half way to the OR I started to shake. When I was moved onto the table and my arms stretched out, I started to cry. They were kind to me, noticed my fear and elevating BP and asked if I wanted help. I said yes and they started the anesthesia right away. The last thing I remember seeing was Dr. Kelly come into the room, but it was his reflection in the metal of the operating lights that had not been turned on yet. The next thing I knew I was starting to feel “fuzzy”… out of it… I don’t know how to describe it… and the anesthesiologist telling me to feel a slight burning in my arm was normal. I nodded and closed my eyes to combat the feeling in my head and that was it. No counting or talking, nothing. Fifty minutes later they had moved me back to the gurney (I wonder how many of them that took!) and there was a doctor flicking my nose and saying my name… “Amber! Time to wake up please!” Flick, flick. My first words? “Dude, I’m working on it!” LOL That must have satisfied them. Next feeling was sort of scooting or half falling back into my bed (the gurney was just an inch or two higher than the bed to help me help myself and them as I moved.
At this point, I was half awake for a short time. I remember my upper chest hurting like I’d had a toddler bouncing on me for days and there was a hard rolling sensation in my chest and guts. I knew this was the gas. I WANTED to get up and move, but I just could not do it at that moment. I needed sleep. In reality, I was still heavily sedated and could not have moved much. I remember the shift doctor coming in and asking AGAIN if I’d had high blood pressure because they were concerned about my BP, it was maxing out at a scary 170 over 85 (ish). They were threatening to give me a sublingual pill to bring it down. I think Dr. Kelly put a stop to that, prior to surgery and in the days before I’d been having LOW BP. It was the anesthesia. My BP stabilized at that level and then quickly went down as the day went on without intervention. I also remember the director of the Hospital itself coming in to visit with my MIL, he was keen to know how the stay was for us, if we were happy and he was excited to explain about the renovations. It was lovely that he was proud of his facility. That says a lot to me. Too bad I was too out of it to reply too! My MIL reports that after that first moment, I was out for an hour. I woke up and expressed that I knew I needed to walk but just could not do it yet. I was hurting but still “gone”. I was told to sleep more. I closed my eyes again and thought it had been just another hour. When I asked, MIL reported that I’d been back in the room for FOUR hours now, I freaked out and got right up (blood clots and gas pains were foremost in my head). I managed to stand with some help and I think I used the bathroom. I managed to walk only the length of my room. This set the pattern. Down for sleep about two hours then up to walk, have some ice chips and move a bit, then back to bed.

I think everyone wants to know about the pain you feel after the operation. Yes, I certainly had some. Like I mentioned, there was a deep ache in my upper chest, diaphragm area. Deep breathing was a chore. The belly/stomach pain I felt was largely psychological I think… I could feel every ice chip go from the top down and it was not pleasant at first because it was so foreign feeling. My worst pain was located on my left side and went from the top of my abdominal muscules straight down to just above where I imagine the pelvic bone starts. It was not IN my body, but through my fat layers. It was a bright pain and felt to me like a knife when I moved. Once I was done moving, I was fine, I could handle it. But getting up, laying down, standing sitting, I’ll be honest… it was tough. I was terrified that I’d pulled stitches or harmed myself. Thank God Dr. Kelly came in that afternoon to check on me and assured me it was just the drain and would indeed be the worst part. I’d been told about this and thought I knew what to expect… I was wrong LOL. I had to get through 48 hours with it and then it would be removed and all would be well. I’d come this far… I could do it! Truly, I think the ONLY reason I needed pain meds after surgery was because of that stupid drain. But it did its job. I consider myself lucky, I did not have near the bloating or gas pain in my body cavity that I expected… some but not much and it seemed to dissipate quickly. Also, I got lucky… I’ve had NO nausea or vomiting. I don’t know what I did to please God enough to get to avoid this side effect, but I’m grateful. If I HAD to have the drain in some weird deal with the Universe to avoid throwing up, I’d take it.
So, the rest of Saturday passed in a blur of sleeping, working to get up to move and generally trying to remain kind to myself. My MIL was wonderful, helping me balance, encouraging me to walk farther and generally moving things around so I could get to them. She does not think she did much, but it meant the world to me. It’s hard for me to ask for help, ever. I was introduced to the spirometer in the late afternoon and dang diggity that was a tough nut to crack! I want to take a moment here to talk about the nurses… They were wonderful. Yes, not all of them spoke English, one or two had none at all, but they were all patient and attentive and wonderful and it all worked out. In example, our room was still too warm/still for us at 68 degrees (it’s generally in the 40’s right now in Seattle) so they hunted down a fan and it was on the WHOLE time for us. Also, when they needed to change my bedding, they asked me to sit in the chair that was in the room… this is one like you see in US hospitals that a person could recline in and sleep in if they had to. Well, it was too low to the floor, I was afraid of it. They did not ask, just saw my fear and figured out my problem… while I was out walking to avoid sitting, they actually muscled the one chair out and brought in a proper recliner (huge thing!) to the room from another room, like you’d see in a living room. It was lovely and comfortable and I was so grateful! The darn thing was so comfy my MIL actually slept in it that night! I think the anesthesia fully wore off in the late hours of the day because all of a sudden I HAD to use the bathroom and I was somehow more aware than I’d been. I made three trips to the loo that night, each one easier than the one before in terms of getting myself up off the bed and moving. In these wee hours of the night is when I finally got a little brave and looked at my body a bit. I could not handle, emotionally, seeing the drain so I tried to ignore it but I looked at the incisions. I was SHOCKED they were all across my upper abdomen, below the breasts. No wonder I felt like kids had been jumping on me! I expected they’d be all over my belly in places… but there’s a nice neat line of them marching across me. The nurses encouraged me to shower on Sunday morning and again in the afternoon. I didn’t have the Spanish to explain that I would throw up seeing the drain. Luckly, Dr. Kelly stepped in and assured me that if it was a mental thing rather than physical they would leave me be until Monday morning when I’d have to shower in preparation for next steps. Okay, deal. Otherwise, Sunday passed in a similar fashion to Saturday afternoon. sleep, up, walk, bathroom, ice chips, spirometer, iPad, sleep. At some point we noticed that my need for sleep was decreasing… the length of time I was awake began to elongate. By the end of Sunday, I was wakeful for about 4 or 5 hours at a time. Go me!

I had not realized that I was crying out inside; to God, the universe, or anyone that would listen… but I was quickly becoming tired of living in my uncooperative body. I was fat, very much so, but my only comorbidity was pain. Bone deep and getting worse. My life was quickly contracting such that I didn’t go out for fear of ridicule and unforeseen challenges… like arms on chairs and seatbelts that would not reach. I had to strategize a trip to the grocery store around my pain threshold. On November 9, 2012 the final straw came. It does not matter what it was. It happened. God had heard the crying I didn’t realize I was pouring out and a solution was presented. On Sunday, November 11, my mind was all but made up that I would undergo the VSG procedure in order to provide my body with a powerful tool to reshape my life.
With many hours online and a face-to-face interview with a former patient of his, I selected surgeon Dr. Jaime Ricardo Ramos Kelly of Tijuana to perform my VSG. Much has been noted on the VerticalSleeveTalk boards about recent changes with Dr. Kelly’s staff and I was in the thick of the transition. I started out working with Omar who left the practice (friendly separation), then came Alina who was lovely but learned quickly her heart was elsewhere, and finally working with Lora Lee, an American they hired who was also a recent Dr. Kelly VSG patient. I had moments of paperwork confusion through this, but NEVER concern for my surgeon or what I would experience once there. And Lora Lee worked HARD in the days before my surgery to be sure I was no longer confused and on the “right page”. Enough about that!
With the decision made that Dr. Kelly was the surgeon for me, paperwork began. I weighed in and learned that my weight, the highest I’d ever seen it, was 529lbs. I worried this would preclude me from surgery but, again, Dr. Kelly has experience working with very high BMI patients and he was confident that with his experience and my dedication this would be a good match. We settled that I’d be operated on Saturday, February 2, 2013. I had all the “normal” up and down emotions… I’d done my research and the risks scared (still scare) the heck out of me, then the moments when I allow myself to dream of the moment when I can shop without being stared at, with less (or no) pain made me excited and happy. At the heart of it, I had PEACE that this was the right decision and God-led. I was scared of the post-op pain and drains and how it would be to not really eat for days… But I knew that I had loved ones to hold me up and encourage me, and really… would the post-op pain really be worse that I was living with right then? Onward!

I'm gonna jump in on this one because, in my philosophy, for many of us it's a bigger picture issue.
I had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Not a personality change, not a lobotomy.
If my obesity is part of a larger mental health issue, then the Sleeve is just half of the answer. Some folks don't know that they have addiction/personality disorder components as part of their diagnosis. Or have some amount of denial. So, they go into the procedure with only half the solution at hand. They can hear/see the formula and "know" the way the lifestyle works... but if they're not addressing the addiction/personality side of it because they don't realize or don't acknowledge it, then it stands to reason old habits will TRY to be retained.
I will freely admit and discuss that, for me, obesity resulted from a life of addiction/mental health disorder. I was damn lucky that my Sleeve Journey started with years of counseling and culminated in a watershed moment where I knew I had to change and needed help to do it. Not everyone for who the story is similar has that resource or insight. I know that without my small army of professionals, family and friends supporting me, I'd probably be asking the same questions you're frustrated by. I often wonder what the support of those asking these questions is like.
Is it frustrating to see folks posting freely about wanting to "cheat"? Yep. Is it SCARY how soon some folks push the envelope? Totally. Do I wonder what is in their minds? All the time. Do I want to shake them and aks why they bothered? Ohmygosh yes!
But then, I think about my own heart and how many times in my 9 weeks post op I've had a (albeit much quieter) demon on my shoulder telling me how good that toast would taste, how a "little piece" of this or that won't hurt me, just ONE will not make the scale go up. How many times in my 9 weeks post op I've failed to follow the program by not getting enough water/protein/exercise... giving in to the demon in my brain on a few occassions.
I guess my point is, I feel ya AmandaRae. Completely. But as a person who is struggling, I'd just ask for those who want to "tell it like it is" to do so, but add a dash of compassion into it too- the person asking about bread/chinese food/eating "normally" may not have half their own story solved or it may be winning them over for the moment. Shall I prepare for the flames now? Or perhaps I've just killed another thread?

oh, and AmandaRaeLeo... I *LOVE* this comment, I need to put it up at my office:
"If you mess up. Have a weak moment. "Cheat". Own it."

I was there six weeks ago and I enjoyed my stay there as a patient and my traveling companion was comfortable too. As mentioned, it's older in aesthetics but they're updating it even now. I loved all the nurses and the hospital bed was, to me, the most comfortable I've ever had occassion to use. Another poster said the linens were too scratchy for her, but I didn't notice. I liked that it was a full-service facility. They are internationally known for their alternative cancer care program and I understand a lot of Amish folks from the States like to use that facility for a variety of care (though I did not meet any on my trip). Nurses and all the doctors who do rounds were wonderful.

I'm gonna jump in on this one because, in my philosophy, for many of us it's a bigger picture issue.
I had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Not a personality change, not a lobotomy.
If my obesity is part of a larger mental health issue, then the Sleeve is just half of the answer. Some folks don't know that they have addiction/personality disorder components as part of their diagnosis. Or have some amount of denial. So, they go into the procedure with only half the solution at hand. They can hear/see the formula and "know" the way the lifestyle works... but if they're not addressing the addiction/personality side of it because they don't realize or don't acknowledge it, then it stands to reason old habits will TRY to be retained.
I will freely admit and discuss that, for me, obesity resulted from a life of addiction/mental health disorder. I was damn lucky that my Sleeve Journey started with years of counseling and culminated in a watershed moment where I knew I had to change and needed help to do it. Not everyone for who the story is similar has that resource or insight. I know that without my small army of professionals, family and friends supporting me, I'd probably be asking the same questions you're frustrated by. I often wonder what the support of those asking these questions is like.
Is it frustrating to see folks posting freely about wanting to "cheat"? Yep. Is it SCARY how soon some folks push the envelope? Totally. Do I wonder what is in their minds? All the time. Do I want to shake them and aks why they bothered? Ohmygosh yes!
But then, I think about my own heart and how many times in my 9 weeks post op I've had a (albeit much quieter) demon on my shoulder telling me how good that toast would taste, how a "little piece" of this or that won't hurt me, just ONE will not make the scale go up. How many times in my 9 weeks post op I've failed to follow the program by not getting enough water/protein/exercise... giving in to the demon in my brain on a few occassions.
I guess my point is, I feel ya AmandaRae. Completely. But as a person who is struggling, I'd just ask for those who want to "tell it like it is" to do so, but add a dash of compassion into it too- the person asking about bread/chinese food/eating "normally" may not have half their own story solved or it may be winning them over for the moment. Shall I prepare for the flames now? Or perhaps I've just killed another thread?

Another one I love is "Make it a choice, not a cheat"!!! I love it because if we are truly making a lifestyle change then there should never be a reason to "cheat". Cheating implies that we shouldn't have something. Why shouldn't we? Even those "normal" people without food issues/addictions eat foods that are not "healthy". The way I see it, if you're going to eat cake, pizza, candy, whatever....make the CHOICE to eat it AND enjoy it, understand what that type of food does to your body (i.e. blood sugar spikes) and then move on and get back on track!!!
I don't deprive myself of anything!! My goal in having surgery was not to NEVER eat something unhealthy ever again. My goal was to develop and healthier relationship with food....which is a work in progress, but nonetheless, progress!!!
Great topic!! And I hear you Amanda Rae....sometimes the things people say here drives me nuts!! Most of the time I just don't respond becasue I realize that I'm being too judgemental and/or it's not my place to speak my mind. Like Measureofme said, we're all at different points in our journey. Hopefully, we'll all find our way!!!

I'm gonna jump in on this one because, in my philosophy, for many of us it's a bigger picture issue.
I had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Not a personality change, not a lobotomy.
If my obesity is part of a larger mental health issue, then the Sleeve is just half of the answer. Some folks don't know that they have addiction/personality disorder components as part of their diagnosis. Or have some amount of denial. So, they go into the procedure with only half the solution at hand. They can hear/see the formula and "know" the way the lifestyle works... but if they're not addressing the addiction/personality side of it because they don't realize or don't acknowledge it, then it stands to reason old habits will TRY to be retained.
I will freely admit and discuss that, for me, obesity resulted from a life of addiction/mental health disorder. I was damn lucky that my Sleeve Journey started with years of counseling and culminated in a watershed moment where I knew I had to change and needed help to do it. Not everyone for who the story is similar has that resource or insight. I know that without my small army of professionals, family and friends supporting me, I'd probably be asking the same questions you're frustrated by. I often wonder what the support of those asking these questions is like.
Is it frustrating to see folks posting freely about wanting to "cheat"? Yep. Is it SCARY how soon some folks push the envelope? Totally. Do I wonder what is in their minds? All the time. Do I want to shake them and aks why they bothered? Ohmygosh yes!
But then, I think about my own heart and how many times in my 9 weeks post op I've had a (albeit much quieter) demon on my shoulder telling me how good that toast would taste, how a "little piece" of this or that won't hurt me, just ONE will not make the scale go up. How many times in my 9 weeks post op I've failed to follow the program by not getting enough water/protein/exercise... giving in to the demon in my brain on a few occassions.
I guess my point is, I feel ya AmandaRae. Completely. But as a person who is struggling, I'd just ask for those who want to "tell it like it is" to do so, but add a dash of compassion into it too- the person asking about bread/chinese food/eating "normally" may not have half their own story solved or it may be winning them over for the moment. Shall I prepare for the flames now? Or perhaps I've just killed another thread?

I'm gonna jump in on this one because, in my philosophy, for many of us it's a bigger picture issue.
I had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Not a personality change, not a lobotomy.
If my obesity is part of a larger mental health issue, then the Sleeve is just half of the answer. Some folks don't know that they have addiction/personality disorder components as part of their diagnosis. Or have some amount of denial. So, they go into the procedure with only half the solution at hand. They can hear/see the formula and "know" the way the lifestyle works... but if they're not addressing the addiction/personality side of it because they don't realize or don't acknowledge it, then it stands to reason old habits will TRY to be retained.
I will freely admit and discuss that, for me, obesity resulted from a life of addiction/mental health disorder. I was damn lucky that my Sleeve Journey started with years of counseling and culminated in a watershed moment where I knew I had to change and needed help to do it. Not everyone for who the story is similar has that resource or insight. I know that without my small army of professionals, family and friends supporting me, I'd probably be asking the same questions you're frustrated by. I often wonder what the support of those asking these questions is like.
Is it frustrating to see folks posting freely about wanting to "cheat"? Yep. Is it SCARY how soon some folks push the envelope? Totally. Do I wonder what is in their minds? All the time. Do I want to shake them and aks why they bothered? Ohmygosh yes!
But then, I think about my own heart and how many times in my 9 weeks post op I've had a (albeit much quieter) demon on my shoulder telling me how good that toast would taste, how a "little piece" of this or that won't hurt me, just ONE will not make the scale go up. How many times in my 9 weeks post op I've failed to follow the program by not getting enough water/protein/exercise... giving in to the demon in my brain on a few occassions.
I guess my point is, I feel ya AmandaRae. Completely. But as a person who is struggling, I'd just ask for those who want to "tell it like it is" to do so, but add a dash of compassion into it too- the person asking about bread/chinese food/eating "normally" may not have half their own story solved or it may be winning them over for the moment. Shall I prepare for the flames now? Or perhaps I've just killed another thread?

I'm gonna jump in on this one because, in my philosophy, for many of us it's a bigger picture issue.
I had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Not a personality change, not a lobotomy.
If my obesity is part of a larger mental health issue, then the Sleeve is just half of the answer. Some folks don't know that they have addiction/personality disorder components as part of their diagnosis. Or have some amount of denial. So, they go into the procedure with only half the solution at hand. They can hear/see the formula and "know" the way the lifestyle works... but if they're not addressing the addiction/personality side of it because they don't realize or don't acknowledge it, then it stands to reason old habits will TRY to be retained.
I will freely admit and discuss that, for me, obesity resulted from a life of addiction/mental health disorder. I was damn lucky that my Sleeve Journey started with years of counseling and culminated in a watershed moment where I knew I had to change and needed help to do it. Not everyone for who the story is similar has that resource or insight. I know that without my small army of professionals, family and friends supporting me, I'd probably be asking the same questions you're frustrated by. I often wonder what the support of those asking these questions is like.
Is it frustrating to see folks posting freely about wanting to "cheat"? Yep. Is it SCARY how soon some folks push the envelope? Totally. Do I wonder what is in their minds? All the time. Do I want to shake them and aks why they bothered? Ohmygosh yes!
But then, I think about my own heart and how many times in my 9 weeks post op I've had a (albeit much quieter) demon on my shoulder telling me how good that toast would taste, how a "little piece" of this or that won't hurt me, just ONE will not make the scale go up. How many times in my 9 weeks post op I've failed to follow the program by not getting enough water/protein/exercise... giving in to the demon in my brain on a few occassions.
I guess my point is, I feel ya AmandaRae. Completely. But as a person who is struggling, I'd just ask for those who want to "tell it like it is" to do so, but add a dash of compassion into it too- the person asking about bread/chinese food/eating "normally" may not have half their own story solved or it may be winning them over for the moment. Shall I prepare for the flames now? Or perhaps I've just killed another thread?

oh, and AmandaRaeLeo... I *LOVE* this comment, I need to put it up at my office:
"If you mess up. Have a weak moment. "Cheat". Own it."

I'm gonna jump in on this one because, in my philosophy, for many of us it's a bigger picture issue.
I had a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Not a personality change, not a lobotomy.
If my obesity is part of a larger mental health issue, then the Sleeve is just half of the answer. Some folks don't know that they have addiction/personality disorder components as part of their diagnosis. Or have some amount of denial. So, they go into the procedure with only half the solution at hand. They can hear/see the formula and "know" the way the lifestyle works... but if they're not addressing the addiction/personality side of it because they don't realize or don't acknowledge it, then it stands to reason old habits will TRY to be retained.
I will freely admit and discuss that, for me, obesity resulted from a life of addiction/mental health disorder. I was damn lucky that my Sleeve Journey started with years of counseling and culminated in a watershed moment where I knew I had to change and needed help to do it. Not everyone for who the story is similar has that resource or insight. I know that without my small army of professionals, family and friends supporting me, I'd probably be asking the same questions you're frustrated by. I often wonder what the support of those asking these questions is like.
Is it frustrating to see folks posting freely about wanting to "cheat"? Yep. Is it SCARY how soon some folks push the envelope? Totally. Do I wonder what is in their minds? All the time. Do I want to shake them and aks why they bothered? Ohmygosh yes!
But then, I think about my own heart and how many times in my 9 weeks post op I've had a (albeit much quieter) demon on my shoulder telling me how good that toast would taste, how a "little piece" of this or that won't hurt me, just ONE will not make the scale go up. How many times in my 9 weeks post op I've failed to follow the program by not getting enough water/protein/exercise... giving in to the demon in my brain on a few occassions.
I guess my point is, I feel ya AmandaRae. Completely. But as a person who is struggling, I'd just ask for those who want to "tell it like it is" to do so, but add a dash of compassion into it too- the person asking about bread/chinese food/eating "normally" may not have half their own story solved or it may be winning them over for the moment. Shall I prepare for the flames now? Or perhaps I've just killed another thread?