cecelialane

It is no secret that bariatric surgery exposes the raw dynamics of our relationships. That is not necessarily a bad thing. People just can't keep their mouths shut and you will very quickly find out what people really think about you. Then you have to deal with it and distance yourself from toxic interaction.
People that you thought were your friends can be mean and unsupportive.
Family can be mean and unsupportive.
Workmates can be mean and unsupportive.
Often when a marriage breaks down after you begin to lose weight, it was already broken before your surgery. Insecurities and jealousies can only hide for so long.
As you lose weight you gain confidence. Spousse find out that you can speak up for yourself, and they don't like it. They may throw roadblocks in your way, like deliberately bring home junk and eating it right in your face. The balance of control in a marriage can change.
So, just be prepared for what may come. If your mate can't be supportive of you being healthy and happy, then they don't deserve to be with you. You will either have to fix or flee.

I had wrote this exact post earlier with a different title, sorry all if that considered a double post... I was binge watching the show this morning.
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I'm almost two years out and eat between 1,100 to 1300 calories a day. I eat between 60 and eighty grams of Protein a day. I try to eat no more than 120 grams of carbs a day. When I go over 150 grams, I gain. That said I have maintained my weight within a two pound variation for a year. I am still considered obese, but am a size 16 down from a size 26/28 and 100 pounds down so am happy.
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I'm sensing a pattern here......
Generally minimize processed carbs, eat moderate carbohydrate.
I don't do refined carbs unless it's a treat.
Very mindful of any processed/refined carbs (don't do them).


I pretty much don't do simple/white/refined carbs on a daily basis--bread, potatoes, rice, pasta--I haven't had but a bite of rice since surgery, no Pasta and maybe 4 slices of bread


Eat them after Protein


do try to avoid foods that are highly processed and full of added carbs though.

Those of us just entering maintenance really need to pay attention to these answers...and apparently carbs

Okay maintenance gang, I have some "experience" to share. In October, roughly 16 months after my surgery, I had been maintaining within 1 pound either way of my goal weight of 145 for nearly 6 months. At a kid's party, I avoided all the sweets, but ate a bunch of breaded chicken nuggets over two days - and nothing else out of the ordinary. My weight went up by 3 pounds, and I decided to get a handle on it immediately. BUT..... It wasn't so easy this time. For three weeks I tried to knock it back down, doing just what I had been doing before, but my weight wouldn't budge, except to bounce in the 148-149 range. No need to panic, right? Yeah, but 3 can lead to 5, which can lead to 10, and THEN you might have a problem because now it's not coming off as easily as before. that's when I figured out that my "honeymoon" was over, and I'd have to work harder than I did before. So I decided to give the 5-day Pouch Test a try.
I followed all the rules of the 5DPT to a tee, and at the end of 5 days my weight was only down about a pound. But I found that my sleeve was getting full sooner and I was staying satisfied longer. Which is exactly what the website promises! And it helped me break some bad habits (tons of peanuts and pistachios) that had crept in. It also reinforced the "no drinking for 30 minutes before or after meals" rule. It's been a little over a week now, and the restriction is still working. My weight is still bouncing around, but it's starting to work it's way back down. This morning I saw 145.9 for the first time in about 6 weeks! One more pound and I'll be happy. I'm going to put a copy of this in the "Sleeve reset was successful" thread too. And I'll keep you posted on how it goes.....

I'll do a quick catch-up here about my maintenance story ...
After I reached goal (150 pounds) and calculated I could eat 1700 cals to maintain, I continued to lose 15 pounds over the next 8 months.
I'm now maintaining (these last 5 months) at 135 while eating 1700 - 1800 cals/day.
I'm still using all my other behavioral "tools" learned and practiced these last 21 months since WLS and even before then as I was awaiting my surgery date.
Everyone's maintenance calories vary a lot, depending on so many things. I have been a devoted My Fitness Pal user, so I know how much I'm eating and what kind of macronutrients my foods contain. Makes it a lot easier for me to be both mindful and accountable to myself.
This is just one big ole science experiment with a sample of one -- you. Good luck to all.

changing your routine is a great idea, and that's what you did. Your body got a bit more fuel and a chance to recover from your workouts. Moving forward, you might try adding another hundred calories to your day, and taking an extra rest day every other week or so. Dong too much can be as hard on your success as too little.

@@NatashaSaysRawr
check with your dietician
Healthy carbohydrates will be added back in to your diet after you have reached 75% of your weight loss.
Weight loss phase - Carbohydrates will be restricted.
Maintenance Phase- Healthy carbohydrates added back into your meals. whole wheat, brown rice or plant based. They will still be in small amounts.

@cecelialane WHAT?!?!?! #GOALS girl!!!! you look AMAZING!!!!!!

Does anyone find it ironic that this thread is directed at people being rude, sarcastic and "ruining" the forum, but a lot of the posts are doing exactly what the complaint is about lol...
I actually find that quite ironic...

I've been on the internet since the dial-up AOL days (yes, I'm that old). This is a never-ending complaint... and no one is ever happy with the results. Over-moderate and people complain that discussion and debate is being stifled. Under-moderate and people get nasty. This site has nothing on parenting sites, BTW. LOL.
In the AOL days, a bunch of us used to hang around chat rooms "trolling for SNERTS" (snot-nosed egotistical rude twerps) and our entertainment would be messing with them. I don't have the time or energy for that anymore, so I just employ the rule "take what helps you, ignore the rest, and move along".
Edited to add: Seriously, if you want to see how vile and nasty people can get toward each other, venture onto a parenting board and make a statement advocating formula feeding and putting infants in daycare. Then carefully step back and watch the bloodbath commence.

I got "yelled" at on here once for asking a question that could have been answered if I had "read the whole thread." So after getting reprimanded I scrolled through the entire post and still didn't really find the answer. I don't ask questions any more. I already feel judged for being overweight and don't need to be judged in a forum.

I totally agree!! I've come to completely scroll past what certain long term posters write because of the excessive negativity and just plain rudeness they display. Its sad that even on some of the the informational posts, where someone is just asking about a certain food or brand, people have to make sarcastic comments or jokes. Im all for good fun, but it just gets annoying when you are actually interested in a topic and some of the the long time users turn the thread into a joke with sarcastic or even sexual comments. It really devalues the board completely. I get that certain long term users seem to know everything about everything (mind you Im only speaking of a few, some of the long term posters are fantastic), but Im tires of newbies getting scolded for asking questions, when everyone here was a newbie at some point!!

The last few weeks I've been seeing a lot of rude responses to posts........each time I saw one I wanted to respond and ask "WTH is your problem?"......but knew that would just add to the drama, and I think that's what those folks are seeking anyway......So I found this "Rant" section and decided this would be the place to express my low opinion of those posters that seem to think that name calling and talking down to people is the way to respond to posts on a support forum....I see this type of response most often from some of the long timers. I'm not going to name names, because I know you know who you are because it is obvious it is done intentionally.....My advice to those folks, is if you're no longer able to provide support without being sarcastic, maybe it's time you move on with your life and just leave the forum and find something you're good at......It's great to have long timers here that will share their experiences with newbies because it is priceless when shared appropriately.....but if you don't know how to do it in a way that is supportive, you're only being hurtful and may actually cause someone not to ask a future question for fear they will be attached for being stupid......
That's the end of my rant.............As Ellen says at the end of all her shows............"Be kind to one another"

Got some greek yoghurt in for breakfast! Got two doses of allopurinol in too. I will never ever miss a dose again! Most painful thing ever!
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Your idea of "fun" may have been what got you to 220 pounds, no?
There's other ways to have fun together. Some even involve exercise. (Sex. I'm talking about sex).

@ christinamo7:
I never could bake.
Are you telling me that if I just wait for a wee bit longer, I'll be able to bake????
Wow! who knew???

Definitely get a swallow test done. You could have a dilation of the esophagus, or your sphincter aren't working, or several other issues they may or may not be related to your surgery. Reach out to your surgeon, without being accusatory, and ask for an evaluation and help. If he won't help you, see if your primary care physician can refer you to a GI doc and find out what's going on. If there was a medical screw up, then you can get it fixed and take legal action if needed.
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I had my post op consultation the other day and my surgeon and i were actually talking about this.
I had asked him why i seem to be able to eat and drink a decent amount of food than others (i get satisfied with half cup)
He explained that as an ex bander the band causes damage to something in the esophagus and when we get sleeved we don't feel the restriction like a virgin sleever. According to him there is a loss of sensation there for us.. so we don't feel it as strongly... therefore his suggestion was to measure the food so i do not overeat and not to completely rely on sensations
On another note... your surgeon does not cut your tummy by sight.. he uses a bougie to guide him for size and does it according to the curvature of your stomach... so he technically can't make it way to big without him realising.
I hope this helps

I am also a lapband conversion so I feel you. Trust me. And I don't think anyone is telling you that there isn't anything wrong with eating 20 ozs of steak, I think what everyone is saying is that it should not have been on your plate to begin with. Yeah, I know, you should feel full, except you didn't until it was too late, many of us have been there.
At 4 or 5 months out, you should still be eating really carefully whether you think you can fit it in or not. You are still healing and establishing your new habits.
The sleeve is not what I expected it to be. I expected to feel that clear restriction I had with the band in which I would eat one more bite and it would tell me "nope! that is the last one or you are going to pay for it!". The most I have felt with the sleeve is being uncomfortably full. It is way more subtle than the band and therefore requires a lot more from the patient.
Again I don't think anyone is telling you that it was ok that you were able to eat that much, but do take into consideration that your capacity may be way greater overall than many, and that doesn't necessarily mean that your sleeve was performed poorly, just that you started with a larger stomach than others. Seems to be the case with me as well. And also consider that while you can eat more than others, doesn't mean you should.

How about just telling him your concerns by saying I feel something is not right. Ask him if there is any testing that can be done to check your stomach, "swallow test", and ask if you could see your chart, stating I have to figure this out. By using"I" in your conversation you are not pointing a finger until you have all of your information. Hope this helps.
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Wow, some of you are right down hateful lol. I say I was talking to my dad while eating a steak for a cook out with the intentions of only have the filet mignon side and was able to consume a 20 oz steak without realizing it and I'm blasted because something might not be wrong????
Let me ask you this, can any of you eat 20 ounces of dense Protein? No? Then something is wrong lol.
My stats were stRted in 2007 before I had a lapband, it was removed last June due to complications and the sleeve done in February so they look better than they are. But I've lost 20 lbs since leaving the hospital with the sleeve.
I might not be the staple for doing everything by the book, but that's not why I came here. The reason I came here is because I ate a 20oz steak and that should be physically impossible and I need to know how to bring this up to my surgeon without making him mad or making he feel like in saying he don't know what he's doing.

@ No one is judging you. I'm working with a therapist on emotional eating - pre-surgery. I have found it very helpful. This is a struggle that most of us go through.

I am now 5yrs out and still do not feel "hunger". I actually had to set my cell phone alarm to remind myself to eat.
Everyone's journey is different. In some ways, I am lucky because I don't feel hunger, but in another way I don't enjoy the "ceremony of food" any longer. I don't enjoy socializing while eating (I'd rather be somewhere else--doing something). Eating to me is just something I have to do to live.
Soooo, if I see something that I used to crave, I know it will taste yummy if I eat it. That is when I have to stop and think, "why do I want that? Am I hungry? No. Will it taste good. Yes!! Is it time to eat something? No. Then I can rationalize (I'm a very "black or white person") not eating it.
I schedule all of my eating times--Snacks included. If it's not time to eat---I don't.
Kinda sat at times, but it's better than being morbid obese.
Prayers going up.