bethL

Oh my goodness, I was feeling the same way. I start friday, but I thought if I built up to it by doing 2 shakes and a meal this week, it might be better. The headaches and lightheadedness are tough. I'm starving. The shakes taste bad. I hope it's worth it!

I loved reading your story, too. I was a size 4-6 in law school. Always yo-yo'd before then. The minute I got out of law school, I blew up like the Hindenburg. It's been terible. It's the most stressful career Incould have chosen, and I need help. surgery is scheduled for August 10th. In taking my life back. Fancy job or not!

I was just talking to my husband about this! I am scared of this, too. I know it's hard. I want to be a health nut and never eat or want chee-toes. My husband suggested that I keep seeing my counselor to discuss my anxiety and food cravings before anything gets out of hand. To fix how you eat, You have to first find out what's eating you...

I can't really help with the sleeve questions, but I had my gallbladder removed by the same doctor on my Wedding anniversary (October 17). The night before I was so paniced. I kept thinking "what will this do to my husband if something really happens to me on our anniversary." I thought about all of those Discovery health horror stories about surgeries. It's anxiety and irrational fears. Something could happen, but odds are, you will be fine. I don't even remember going under. I just remember waking up. Then, I watched stupid TV for a week. My husband kept telling me I had to go back to work, eventally and I shouldn't rot my brain. He said he married a tax lawyer not some one who watches Maury Povitch, Dance Moms, and Toddlers and Tiaras. I told him to shove it! This is going to be great! Before you go to sleep tonight, dream of the places you want to go and the clothes you want to wear when you reach your goal weight. Dream of not being tired when you walk long distances or not freaking out when you get the middle seat on an airplane. Dream of your next high school renuion or all of the events that will come in your life where you will actually want to keep the pictures as momentos instead of stowing them away because you hate how you look. Keep your eye on the prize!

Please keep us posted! The entire reason why I am having the sleeve done is so that I can have a healthy baby. I'm about 265 right now with 100+ lbs to lose. My doctor told me that I had to wait two years, and that just seems like agony and far longer than necessary. I don't know why he wants me to wait that long. I'm anxious to see how everything goes with you! Congratulations!

I'm in the pre-surgery phase as well, and I, too, am struggling with who to tell and what to say. Reading all of your responses have been extremely helpful. I have received a ton of support from my husband and my mother. When I tell others such as the tech giving me my EKG or the X-ray tech or the guy at smoothie King who questions why I need a “Gladiator” with no fruit when clearly it's not the best tasting item on the menu, their facial expressions relay what they are really thinking: "why don't you just stop eating you big fat a**?" Don't they think I've tried that? I've tried everything. People are very judgmental. I shouldn't care, but I do. I don't want to tell my father because my size zero anorexic stepmother will tell the universe. I can hear it now: "Beth looks so good." Stepmother: "She had bariatric surgery” with a tone that somehow minimizes the work that I DID do. As for co-workers, I subscribe to the theory that you tell one, you might as well tell them all. I've buffered the issue by claiming that I “haven't been feeling well” before all of my upper GI tests. Then, when it comes time to schedule the surgery, I will take the vacation time and tell them that I've been having gastrointestinal issues that need to be addressed – I'll be out of the office for a week and I will work from home for the second week. Maybe one day I will tell the world about my journey. For now, it's my journey. I will share it only with the man I've chosen to spend my life with and the woman who gave me life.