Zoe

Newbandster, check the food forum subheading under Main LapBand Forums; there are good suggestions there for mushy food. I started an "ethnic mushy" thread a while back, and lots of people posted good suggestions. Congratulations to you!

Oh, man ... the only thing to do is to laugh at our crazy family stories. My relatives aren't too bad, just your basic dysfunctional Americans. Here's one: my father died about 20 years ago; while he was still in the hospital (and the rest of us were visiting him), my youngest brother stole my dad's valuable stamp collection and fenced it to buy cocaine. The night of my dad's memorial service, this bro came roaring into the family house, drunk on his ass, swigging from a bottle of vodka, crying and screaming and demanding to be taken to the airport so he could go to California. My mother was terrified. Two of my other brothers -- big, muscular guys who look like extras from the Sopranos -- exchanged glances, said, "sure, we'll take you," dragged his scrawny ass through the airport, and bought him a ticket. My sober 6'4" brother got down on his knees at the security check-in, praying that the guards would let the drunk on the plane. They did. (This was long before 9/11/01.) I answered the phone at my mother's house at 6 the next morning. "I'm in f*ing Orlando," little bro cried. "What happened to me?" He didn't remember a thing -- including that the brothers had decided to keep him away from the California family and bought him a one-way ticket to Florida.

Pat, you'll be able to answer your own question by the time you read this. I jumped on this thread late, and I seem to be in a minority: my port is near my left hipbone. At the moment there is absolutely no danger of it protruding! Even when I get close to my goal weight it'll probably be padded, to judge from the 19th-century photos of my pear-shaped female ancestors. I haven't had any trouble with the port so far, and it doesn't hurt at all.

Thank you, ladies! Marie, I'm 47. The pictures don't show all the salt in my salt-and-pepper hair. (I stopped dyeing it a couple of years ago -- too high-maintenance, and I kind of dig the silver.) Darcy, I think it's great that one of your in-laws noticed your impressive weight loss. Did your mother say anything after hearing the blurter's comment? Blossom, thank you for the compliment. Do you have some post-surgical stats to report? I bet you're getting close to Onederland!

I don't have a new full-length picture, and I'm wearing a jacket so you can't tell that I'm finally getting the barest suggestion of a waist -- but here goes. The before picture was taken by someone who was mad at me! That's my story and I'm sticking to it. I'll be brave and get a jacketless photo for my six-month anniversary in February.

Is Penni the front half and Lulu the back? Whatever the case, you look fantastic! But I think you're a big liar because a child your age couldn't possibly be a grandmother. You don't even look 40! Yes, you are evil!

That puts things in perspective for those of us who started out in Twoville/Twonesia. Thanks for sharing your fabulous pictures! You look gorgeous, and should be very proud of yourself.

Welcome, Kim! There are a lot of people on this board who have been banded in the last couple of weeks, so you have some fellow-travelers on your journey. Before I had the surgery, I read a lot of the old posts; they helped let me know what I was getting into, and the success stories were very encouraging. When you get to the mushy food stage, check the food forum. People have posted some good recipes there. Good luck, and let us know how you're doing.

Well, Doug, tomorrow's the big day. I'm certain everything will go well for you. Tell your kids that they can help their mama pick out some yucky liquids for you to drink when you come home! Good luck.

Pat, by the time you read all these messages, you'll be a bandster! Welcome to the other side. The first few days are the hardest. Hang in there, and let us know how you're doing. Congratulations!

Great idea, Lisa. New thread for loss. Meanwhile, back to our regularly scheduled programming.

Thanks, Marie, Becky, and Michelle. I'm on a plateau right now (may have something to do with all the holiday goodies I've been chowing down) but feeling great, what with all the walking I'm doing. Whenever I start to get frustrated, I remind myself of the slow, steady, and remarkable progress that y'all have made with the band. All I need is patience -- and maybe another fill after Jan. 1, which my surgeon friend wants to witness out of scientific curiosity. We all have different ways of amusing ourselves!

Today I visited a friend who's a surgeon, and not exactly overendowed with tact. When she saw me, the first words out of her mouth were "You look like a normal person!" After I slapped her upside the head she at least had the good grace to laugh at herself. Hey, it's not the most lavish compliment I've ever received, but she was sincere. And while I still have a lot of weight to lose, I am starting to feel (and maybe even look) like what passes for normal. In a good way.

Hi Hillary -- There's an older thread here somewhere called something like "How many would do it over again?" I think Jack started it. Lots of bandsters weigh in (no pun intended, honest) with their feelings and opinions. I second what everyone else has said. Yes, there's some pain right after the surgery, but it doesn't last long. I got my band about three months ago, and I feel better than I have in years.

Wow, 66 pounds down, with no port. Fantastic! And you even managed to get a call from the mysterious Dr. Lopez. That's downright miraculous. You will find a way to get to Mexico; maybe we could have an on-line boa and hat auction. I'm so happy that you finally heard from Dr. L, that he's helping you get a break on the hospital fees, and that you got some straight answers about your port. May your wound stay closed and your spirits high. We're all rooting for you. :banana

Brilliant story, Lauri! Hey, we have to take our admirers where we find them. Yesterday I had an enchilada and a whole lot of guacamole and chips (funny how they just slip right past the band) with a friend who's heard some of my better pre-band noises. We stopped at a florist's and I was almost out the door when a huge avocado-flavored belch roared out of my mouth. I was sure the windows would shatter! My friend just turned around and said, "I haven't heard one of those for a long, long time." The cashier's eyes were on me, and several customers', but I just closed the door behind me with a weak little smile.

Wow, Leatha, that's wonderful! :banana You must feel great, especially since you assembled the *&$^% bike yourself. BTW, I'll try to post a better picture soon, one that isn't all forehead -- although it does make my face look thinner than it really is! I was walking through the park this morning, feeling very proud of myself for getting my heart rate going. My crazy dog took advantage of my inattention and ran through the mud to pick up a dead squirrel, which she then pretended to kill herself, shaking it in her jaws. When I finally got it away from her, she had to give me a slobbery puppy kiss. That's what I get for not being more particular in my choice of exercise partner.

Good luck with the radiologist, Elizabeth. I wonder if we bandsters are more inclined than the average person to try to recreate our work and personal lives. We wouldn't have opted for the band in the first place if we didn't believe we could change for the better; the band then shows us that, yes, change is possible.

Congratulations, Fran! The shoulder and gas pains are pretty common after banding. Some of us find that a heating pad helps. Hang in there -- you'll probably feel a lot better in another day or two.

Alex, I think I know what you're going through. I worked in the nonprofit world for many years, then started a publications agency for nonprofits. But suddenly I needed to make some serious money to pay off bills, so off to the corporate world I went, six years ago, thinking it would be temporary. I'm still there. I have a great boss, good pay, good benefits -- and a job that doesn't suit me at all. If you were childless it might be easier to walk away from the money, but paying huge bills for insurance isn't a choice most of us would, or could, willingly make. Keep looking: a better job will come along. And you're right to watch the calendar; the years can pass all too quickly. Me, I'm waiting for the board of directors to sell off the company I work for so I can collect my (very modest) pay-out and start a new life doing something I love. If there's a nonprofit alliance in your area, you might check it for job postings. Good luck!

Come on now, ladies (and gents, if you're out there) -- isn't there anyone else who does most of their Christmas shopping on Dec. 24? It's an aerobic experience! Not to mention the adrenaline rush that comes from doing everything at the last minute. By the way, where did I put that bag of cranberries I was going to use for Thanksgiving?

I hadn't thought of that, Nancy, but you're absolutely right! I put a couple of packs of Kleenex in the car because it's not bursting with paper napkins anymore. Hey, Burger King's loss is Kimberly-Clark's gain.

Penni, you deserve credit for your latest post. I think some of us who were not even Lopez patients rushed to judgment against Margret. I'd like to wish Margret well in her band journey, then I'll take a deep breath and walk away from this thread.

I haven't tried to call Dr. Rumbaut's cell phone lately; if you're having trouble, you might want to try his office. I spoke to him on the cell phone months ago, but he may have switched carriers since then. Glad you got unfilled -- hope you feel a lot better soon.

Glad to hear that so many people are already interested! Momhappe, that's a great offer on the hotels. Let's see if there's more comments over the next few weeks, then we can start thinking about a date.