DeLarla

Wishing the best for you and knowing in my heart that you'll do great.

Okay, I wasn't sure if this was funny, but since we're on the topic of stones.... Taking a wee break from the golf course, Tiger Woods drives his new Mercedes to an Irish gas station. An attendant greets him in typical Irish fashion, unaware who the golf pro is. "Top of the mornin' to ya". As Tiger gets out of the car, two tees fall out of his pocket. "So what are those things, laddie?" asks the attendant. "They're called tees," replies Tiger. "And what would ya be usin 'em for, now?" asks the Irishman. "Well, they're for resting my balls on when I drive," replies Tiger. "Aw, Jaysus, Mary an' Joseph" exclaims the Irish attendant. "Those fellas at Mercedes think of everything."

Stacey, I had the major poohs, too. Nasty & rumbly to the point I thought something was horribly wrong, so I ran to Urgent Care. They ran tons of tests but nothing was wrong. It was just years worth of built up sludge from way inside my colon & guts, I suppose. Sorry to get gross, but we're all in the same boat.

I know this won't make you feel any better, but I'm gonna say it anyway: Just be happy your insurance covers the band! A lot of us had to self-pay. Besides, it's the bride's wedding, so everyone will be looking at her. You'll have your day soon.

That's such a nice introduction. I hear there's a BOGO sale going on: Buy a Lap Band and get your new lap free!

Okay, I read that article. That's too creepy for me. I'm not putting that garbage in my body any more.

We can be a pretty gross bunch, that's for sure. If you think this is TMI, try checking out my other post under, "Warning, Gross Pictures." I've never heard anyone having such a long PB stuck episode. Mine usually pass within 5-10 minutes. I can eat bread, just not as much as I used to, as long as I take small bites and chew really well.

A PB is something that happens when you eat too fast, or when you try to swallow a bite that's too big. The particle gets trapped and can't pass through the band, and the sensation is horrible and hard to explain. PB is short for Productive Burp. You'll be eating, then suddenly feel like a golf ball is trapped somewhere in your throat or esophagus or chest. Hard to describe, and everyone has a different version, but my eyes start to Water, it's hard for me to talk, the pain & pressure makes me keep trying to swallow but that doesn't help press the offending particle down. I march around the house pounding my chest, but that doesn't help either. Then, either the stuck particle will suddenly pass through, which will bring you immediately relief, or you will have a famous PB, where you'll kind of upchuck wads of gross slime a couple times, then the stuck particle will come out your throat and you'll spit it up. As soon as the thing gets unstuck from either going down or back up, you'll feel normal again. It's almost like a heart-attack feeling of pain & pressure, only in the throat/neck/chest kinda area. To avoid them, don't eat fast - ever. Chew your food till it's mush - always. Don't ever drink during a PB because it makes it worse, not better. liquid will not push the thing through. Good luck!

Bumping for Jenna. By the way, these pictures don't do these wounds justice. Just ask Penni, they were much more horrifying in person. I could have stored a golf ball or two in the gaping hole. EEWWWEEE!

So, let's see those photos!

I forgot to mention that a weeping wound happens with any type of surgery. My friend had a major breast reduction and leaked for 8 weeks. I leaked for 8 months. First, the original port got infected so they removed it. Then I got a new port, but they put the port in the same old infected wound, so that 2nd port got infected, too. I had the 2nd one removed in January. I need a new port, but $$$ is an issue since I'm still paying off all these complications.

The burning doesn't sound so good. Is it red, warm, foul odor? Now that I know you're leaking, I can tell you a lot more. First, don't trust or listen to anything anybody tells you unless they are a qualified band surgeon. I went to urgent care several times (I even showed my vet because nobody else could help me.) I'm in Vegas and don't have a local band doc. The reason a regular doctor can't help you is because you have an implant, and the tubing so near the surface of the skin might be what's preventing your incision to close. A regular doctor probably won't know that. The liquid collects inside the new cavity and needs to escape. If there's too much liquid, it comes out the incision, but eventually the incision is supposed to close and your body will eliminate any residual Fluid. But the stuff needs to escape, so you can't force the wound to close. I tried everything including (don't laugh) a blow dryer, driving in a sports bra on the highway with all the windows open, laying in the blazing summer sun, liquid bandages... you name it, I tried getting the thing to stop leaking. But it needs to drain. If it closes before it's ready, then it will just have to burst open again so it can drain more. Mine closed and burst open several times and got so bad at one point that Urgent Care had to lance it open. Keep the wound clean and change the bandages often to keep the rest of the area as dry as possible. Meanwhile, while you are currently taking antibiotics, you still need to contact your band surgeon. Let's hope you have a normal leak (this is called a weeping wound.) My leaking was the sign of infection to come. (Don't get too worried cause others leaked and soon closed with no further problem.) My story was worse because my leaking was the sign of infection, and I had to get my port removed. Once the port becomes infected, not even antibiotics can help. Read that line again: Once the port becomes infected the only option is port removal. I had to get my port removed a month after surgery. Then my wound STILL wouldn't close because they kept the tubing too near the surface of the wound. I've had two ports, and both of them leaked, and both have been removed. I'm currently portless. Please keep a very keen eye on that area. The antibiotics might be okay to fight off any new infection, but I wouldn't trust anybody but a band surgeon at this point. Take the time to call your sugeon and tell him you're on antibiotics to be on the safe side. Wishing you the best.

I actually did buy a fur lined sink and an electric dog polisher. Is that bad? Cracking up cuz I adore Steve!

I think Princess stopped coming to LBT. She's kinda a private gal and might eat my head now. Silly Daisy, I just had a brain fert.

There are hundreds of clichés that cover this topic. People are often judgmental by nature, and unless they walk a mile in our moccasins they'll never understand what our obsession with food is like. Next time he changes a tire, tell him he should have done it bare handed like a real man. What kind of weakling needs a crow bar? Geeze, what a wimp. Does your husband own any tools? The band is just a tool to assist us in losing weight. We are not super humans. Tell him to throw away all his tools before opening his mouth again.

I was told NO carbonation, so I stopped drinking beer. But I recently saw a frosty freshly cracked-open beer and couldn't resist. I was suprises that it tasted gross. I guess it officially takes one year to stop liking beer, and I LOVED beer.

Before my band I had a horrible hiatal hernia, and I could never burp. Now when I feel one coming on, I let it rip because it feels so good, like 10 years of burp waiting to go. I can burp with the boys now. Hubby is very proud.

The running joke is to shove rolls of quarters in your underwear! The FDA requires that you be at least 100 pounds overweight or have a BMI over 40, unless you have other weight related problems. However, there are no such standards in Mexico, which is why a lot of people go there. Some people have (and this is so sad) even tried gaining extra weight, but maybe a decent doctor will fudge the numbers????

Ohhhh, you make me have tears in my eyes! Come to Vegas in September and you can catch up and meet a whole batch at once.

Oh, and DITTO to the "AAAHHHH" that Kathy was talking about, because my CPAP allowed me to sleep for the first time in 10 years. I haven't used it since losing 70 pounds, but that's the best invention ever (once you get used to it.) Nice!

Wow, you make me really proud to be able to admit you might have a problem. That's not easy to do. Kudos to you for doing more research on the subject. Inducing vomitting (any type of vomitting) can be detrimental to the band.

We don't have a Smoothie King, but it would definitely be peanut butter & chocolate. Hell, toss in a banana if you gotta.

It's awesome that you finally got to experience what life is all about. I never let my weight stop me from doing that kind of thing, but I always felt bad for my husband cause I knew the day would come when I'd have a heart attack in the middle of nowhere. Good for you, and good for your family that you finally get to join them. What a beautiful spot, too.

Last night I had dinner with Jenne (Princess N' The Pea) and her husband. She ate like a lovely little bandster, I ate like the bear that tried to get into Kimberlilly's house. She brought Voodoo & Sachi squeaky toys, which Voodoo immediately claimed as his own (selfish boy takes after Daddy Chris.) Voo brought both toys to bed last night. Anybody that brings toys to my children is okay by me! I was going to make a list of all the bandsters I've met, but now I realize the list is way too long... Francesa, Donali, Penni, Vera, Carole, Michelle, Ginny, Teresa, Megan, Leatha, Babs, Karen H. Vika, Sonja, Greg, The Doodle... the list goes on and on and on. Who have you met?

OMG, I'm the most jealous girl in the world right now. I'm a bear & coon fanatic and wish they'd visit me! Why not jut put a big ole bowl of bear food on the poorch for your new fur baby? My friend that lives in the mountains is always chasing wild burrow (mules) off her front porch. She gets really mad cause I coax them over with dog biscuits so they'll keep coming back. Once one stuck his head in my car window so I couldn't move my car because he wanted to drink my Diet Pepsi. I never knew bears ate bird seed though. I guess if I had a lil one I might worry, or keep a can of hairspray by the window to scare him away.