makemyownluck

THANK YOU - for all of that.

I've been in her shoes. My ex-bf had RNY and had an extensive WLS world that I was lucky enough to be part of. I will say that the side effects he had as a result made me think giving up food food wasn't worth all that. He had stinky poop from partially digested food, dumping if he ate something with sugar, and bathroom issues galore. After hearing similar stories from other RNY people, I did decide food was better than that.
Fast forward five years, and I'm 9 weeks out from VSG and I know it was the best thing for me. But that's paritally because I was 25 pounds heavier after so many yo-yo diets I lost track.
Your carpool buddy may get to that point. It may take a number on the scale, tired of crying when trying on clothes, or seeing their parents and realizing that will be her. Honestly, I hope it doesn't. I hope she will be able to get control of her food issues and be healthy and happy without surgery. I wasn't able to do that.
All I can suggest to you is to be a shining example of the VSG. Don't push your weight loss in her face. Don't brag about how much you've lost in such a short time. If she is interested, she will ask questions. Then you can brag away! I think that's what real friends do, regardless of how they lost the weight.

So agree with this. I've told my closest friend who had RnY and I plan to tell the others in our close group at our next get together. I've told my husband (of course), Mom, and sisters, my Dad will worry so he will find out closer to the date. Also, as far as extended family, I doubt they'd care one way or another as long as I am healthy. Extended friends, if they ask I'll proudly tell but I tend not to broadcast everything to everyone about most anything in my life.
I know some of my close friends will worry but that is for them to get past. I can't think of anyone who would down my decision although I know that is a strong possibility. I've come to realize that some people who may seem like they are unsupportive may be masking concern/fear for you. While others will be unsupportive due to their own self-acceptance issues.

When I was earlier in the process I definitely worried more. Now I figure that those who are truly benevolent forces in my life will Celebrate with me, & the snakes will expose themselves.
347*294/285/135 (*347HW/294SSW) | @Mwrarr | mwrarr.wordpress.com

So I was carpooling with my BFF this morning. She is the only friend who I have told that I'm in the process of getting this surgery. She and my parents are the only people I've discussed this with. She's overweight as well, though not as heavy as I am, she's still quite heavy. I don't really talk to her about it much, but she asked me how my seminar went on Monday. So I tell her how it was, how I already knew the things they were discussing, that I was anxious to see the MD, etc. When I'm done, she says, "I just don't think I could do that." I ask her why not? And she responds "I just couldn't give up fooooodddd," with such passion, as if she was talking about the love of her life.
Now, she's a girl who loves to eat. I get that. But hearing her say that out loud, the way she did... it felt like I had just been snapped out of a trance. That was me. That was me when I was her age (she's 7 years younger than I am), saying the exact thing. And it strengthened my resolve to say I don't want to be a person like that anymore.
I've already changed so much in the past few months in preparation. Saying no to things I would have never refused before. Working out. Tuning into my actual hunger... and it just made me a little sad for my friend. To be so thrown by the idea of having to be on a liquid to solid staged diet, and I explained that part only lasts about 8-12 weeks out of your ENTIRE LIFE. It's not the end of the dang world! Part of this is due to her own naivety about surgery in general, and the differences between them. I'm sure she has no idea what kind of surgery I want (although I've told her).
So, I told her in my most patient voice, "Well, hey, I know where you're coming from, and I hope that you don't get to a point where you have to do something like this. But if you get to be my age and feel like an old lady too soon, you might change your mind about how important that food is to you."
Now, I worried she might take that a little harshly. But I figure it's better than me saying what I WANTED to say, which was "Well, I know where you're coming from, but when the time comes that I'm the smaller one, you might change your mind about how important that food is to you."
Does anyone else worry about how their friends and family will react to the "new you"? I suppose a side effect of losing weight is how it can potentially alter your relationships. I'd love to hear some other perspectives on this...

So I was carpooling with my BFF this morning. She is the only friend who I have told that I'm in the process of getting this surgery. She and my parents are the only people I've discussed this with. She's overweight as well, though not as heavy as I am, she's still quite heavy. I don't really talk to her about it much, but she asked me how my seminar went on Monday. So I tell her how it was, how I already knew the things they were discussing, that I was anxious to see the MD, etc. When I'm done, she says, "I just don't think I could do that." I ask her why not? And she responds "I just couldn't give up fooooodddd," with such passion, as if she was talking about the love of her life.
Now, she's a girl who loves to eat. I get that. But hearing her say that out loud, the way she did... it felt like I had just been snapped out of a trance. That was me. That was me when I was her age (she's 7 years younger than I am), saying the exact thing. And it strengthened my resolve to say I don't want to be a person like that anymore.
I've already changed so much in the past few months in preparation. Saying no to things I would have never refused before. Working out. Tuning into my actual hunger... and it just made me a little sad for my friend. To be so thrown by the idea of having to be on a liquid to solid staged diet, and I explained that part only lasts about 8-12 weeks out of your ENTIRE LIFE. It's not the end of the dang world! Part of this is due to her own naivety about surgery in general, and the differences between them. I'm sure she has no idea what kind of surgery I want (although I've told her).
So, I told her in my most patient voice, "Well, hey, I know where you're coming from, and I hope that you don't get to a point where you have to do something like this. But if you get to be my age and feel like an old lady too soon, you might change your mind about how important that food is to you."
Now, I worried she might take that a little harshly. But I figure it's better than me saying what I WANTED to say, which was "Well, I know where you're coming from, but when the time comes that I'm the smaller one, you might change your mind about how important that food is to you."
Does anyone else worry about how their friends and family will react to the "new you"? I suppose a side effect of losing weight is how it can potentially alter your relationships. I'd love to hear some other perspectives on this...

I wish you success as well! In the past 24 hours, I've adjusted to the actual starting weight, and realistically, I was in the ballpark on what I thought I weighed anyway, so I just had to let the shock of actually KNOWING sink in. Just want to make sure I weigh less than that when I see the surgeon again.
I'm in this for the long haul, too, I look forward to seeing us both progress! Good luck to you!!
I'm glad you're friends aren't experiencing that side effect. But it's a pretty significant number of patients who do, and it's a chance I don't want to take. And also, the nutritional deficiencies I had mentioned. The sleeve is more of a normal life once you're in maintenance.
I know the difference between the surgeries. I just don't want RNY. or the band.

So I was carpooling with my BFF this morning. She is the only friend who I have told that I'm in the process of getting this surgery. She and my parents are the only people I've discussed this with. She's overweight as well, though not as heavy as I am, she's still quite heavy. I don't really talk to her about it much, but she asked me how my seminar went on Monday. So I tell her how it was, how I already knew the things they were discussing, that I was anxious to see the MD, etc. When I'm done, she says, "I just don't think I could do that." I ask her why not? And she responds "I just couldn't give up fooooodddd," with such passion, as if she was talking about the love of her life.
Now, she's a girl who loves to eat. I get that. But hearing her say that out loud, the way she did... it felt like I had just been snapped out of a trance. That was me. That was me when I was her age (she's 7 years younger than I am), saying the exact thing. And it strengthened my resolve to say I don't want to be a person like that anymore.
I've already changed so much in the past few months in preparation. Saying no to things I would have never refused before. Working out. Tuning into my actual hunger... and it just made me a little sad for my friend. To be so thrown by the idea of having to be on a liquid to solid staged diet, and I explained that part only lasts about 8-12 weeks out of your ENTIRE LIFE. It's not the end of the dang world! Part of this is due to her own naivety about surgery in general, and the differences between them. I'm sure she has no idea what kind of surgery I want (although I've told her).
So, I told her in my most patient voice, "Well, hey, I know where you're coming from, and I hope that you don't get to a point where you have to do something like this. But if you get to be my age and feel like an old lady too soon, you might change your mind about how important that food is to you."
Now, I worried she might take that a little harshly. But I figure it's better than me saying what I WANTED to say, which was "Well, I know where you're coming from, but when the time comes that I'm the smaller one, you might change your mind about how important that food is to you."
Does anyone else worry about how their friends and family will react to the "new you"? I suppose a side effect of losing weight is how it can potentially alter your relationships. I'd love to hear some other perspectives on this...

depends a lot on your starting weight. those of us w/ higher starting weights tend to lose weight quicker, but then we have further to go.

Wow, I love this site! This was my fear too. In researching the sleeve (I learned about it in my seminar) I found it used to be the first part of a Dudonal (?sp) Switch surgery. It started off with the sleeve and then later you went in for a bypass. That's what they give many people who have lots of weight to lose...at least until they found out the sleeve was successful on its own.
I am also 5'10.5" in my 30s and am opting for the sleeve. My friend (not quite my height) had RnY and the amount of Vitamins she takes scares me to death. Plus at any given time I worry she is going to throw up or choke. Dumping is not a joke! That's part of the reason I put this off for over 2 years from when I first considered WLS.
300poundsdown.com is the BEST! She is a real motivation and her courage is amazing...all while being a single Mom. I love her site!
I started at 375 lbs. So although I'm not exactly at the same starting point, I have over 200 lbs to drop. I was shooting for 150-160 lbs (last weight I felt my best). I'm in this for the long haul and I'm sure you'll be successful Andrea!

I totally understand! We all have our concerns and I question my ability to get to my goal - and to stay under it! My biggest fear is gaining it all back.
Plus, I am a snacker and sweets eater. I know the bypass is a better surgery to deal with those issues, but I feel safer with my decision to have the sleeve.
The one thing we need to stop doing is doubting ourselves. Our goals can and will be met! Hugs!

I'm 5'0" and 428 lbs. My BMI was 85 when I saw the surgeon and he doesn't feel comfortable doing the RNY on me. He feels that the VSG would be safer. I still have to get under 400 lbs. before he'll do the surgery, though. Good luck!

You are only restricted by you and the effort you are willing to put into the process. Just put one foot in front of the other and get 'er done. Take it one pound at a time and if need be, break it down to one ounce at a time. It will happen!! Good luck and hugs to you!

It is completely doable and you WILL do it! I say stay persistent with your surgeon and stress how much you want a sleeve versus RNY. There are plenty of people on this forum that have higher BMI's and have had successful VSG procedures.
I know that you may feel that 289 lbs. is a daunting task, but I recommend just taking it day by day, week by week, month by month, etc. Any loss is better than a gain, I always say. Even if I am only down 1 pound a week I think to myself...that is one pound less than last week and look to find the good in everyday. There are positives everyday and they don't always have to be wins on the scale.
Good Luck to you! Keep us posted on your decision and discussion with the surgeon.
Take care!

I'm going to chime in here although I was a lower BMI patient at 39.5. My surgeon prided himself on sleeving higher BMI patients that other surgeons rejected. I don't know if they lost 100% of their excess weight, but even if not, whatever they lost has to be a vast improvement in their health. He talked about those cases with great pride and pleasure as if they were successful.
Please realize too that it might be difficult to get to the "prescribed" BMI where you're coming from, simply due to the weight of excess skin.
Wishing you the best, and my, what a beautiful face! I know you're sick of hearing that, but it is true!

Great analogy, proudgrammy!
And I agree. Especially since your NUT and MD are communicating with each other - your MD is deferring to the NUTs opinion on her area of expertise (which would be nutrition). I would say your MD probably should have advised you to discuss the topic with your NUT instead of giving you a misguided answer... can I guess that your MD is a MAN? lol - am I right??
Good luck getting it straightened out, though. If this particular conflict of info is really bothering you, I'd bring it up when you talk to your NUT so they can maybe elaborate on the answer your MD gave or just clearly advise that you should be doing something other than what the MD said.

hi chad what a dilema you have - dr. & NUT not always agreeing with the other. If you have to choose - i would listen to the NUT - she is the nutrition expert. Protein not necessary for first - never heard that, strange.
"stick to what you believe" thats gotta be hard/not sure if i agree, but i understand - i would talk and listen more to NUT - you have your great thoughts, a lot conceived from this forum - IMO NUT is the way to go over surgeon
quick analogy - i had PT for my knee after replacement - therapist told me to do one thing, dr said something else. i decided i wouldn't have my PT do my knee surgery, and i would NOT have surgeon do my physical therapy, figure it out
good luck - you're doing great

I was sleeved at 33, i have been looking into WLS since my early 20s but never had insurance to cover it and couldn't afford to pay myself. I wish I could have been sleeved younger, and 70 to 100 lbs lighter.

Should Wls Be Performed At An Early Age?
Yes, that's why I got it at 62.

My wife got the bypass, I had prostate cancer and didn't want the malabsorption, I need solid nutrition. The band is too high maintenance and seemingly has less success. My doc leaned toward the bypass for me, I leaned back toward the sleeve which he gave me. He underestimated my determination to lose. 2 more pounds and I send him a picture,

Being sleeved yet or not has nothing to do with common sense and reality.

you look amazing! and so much younger! keep up the great work.

I agree that complications are frightening - we'd be fools not to be worried about that to some extent. But I'm choosing sleeve because it has the lowest long term risk of complication. Lapband and RNY patients have a whole set of complications they could face at any point in their lives, whereas sleevers typically don't once they are healed from the initial surgery.
Congrats on having a date set! It's right around the corner, lucky you!!

I agree that complications are frightening - we'd be fools not to be worried about that to some extent. But I'm choosing sleeve because it has the lowest long term risk of complication. Lapband and RNY patients have a whole set of complications they could face at any point in their lives, whereas sleevers typically don't once they are healed from the initial surgery.
Congrats on having a date set! It's right around the corner, lucky you!!