gustavo52974

A little bit of tough love here, but let's add things up: he's a drug user (yes, marijuana is a drug), he's cheated on you, he's emotionally abusive, he's controlling and doesn't want you to spend time with your family, he's a financial disaster, he'd rather you be big than thin, he's emotionally erratic, you're waiting for him to physically hurt you before you can divorce him, and you think giving him children will help things. Seriously, how many red flags do you need here?

A little bit of tough love here, but let's add things up: he's a drug user (yes, marijuana is a drug), he's cheated on you, he's emotionally abusive, he's controlling and doesn't want you to spend time with your family, he's a financial disaster, he'd rather you be big than thin, he's emotionally erratic, you're waiting for him to physically hurt you before you can divorce him, and you think giving him children will help things. Seriously, how many red flags do you need here?

Eat some dried plaintains instead. Great potato chip substitute, much better for you. Just don't eat a bunch.

Oh darn...when I saw the title as "Macho cheese Doritos" I got a little excited. Hehe. I thought maybe there was a new brand of Doritos targeted specifically for men or something. Well, it was probably just the word "Macho" that got my attention, if I have to be completely honest. :wub:
I assume that "Macho" was a result of some predictive autocorrect situation.
But yes, I agree with those above that you should wait until you've developed solid healthful eating habits and follow your surgeon and nutritionists post-op food stage diet, etc. before you even think about eating junk food--you might find that you don't want those Doritos anymore after a while.
You should also consider WHY you want those Doritos...and what caused you to gain weight in the first place. Emotional eating, volume eating, etc...it's important to know what got you to the point of needing weight loss surgery. Discuss this with your nutritionist, VSG support group, or maybe even a counselor.

Oh darn...when I saw the title as "Macho cheese Doritos" I got a little excited. Hehe. I thought maybe there was a new brand of Doritos targeted specifically for men or something. Well, it was probably just the word "Macho" that got my attention, if I have to be completely honest. :wub:
I assume that "Macho" was a result of some predictive autocorrect situation.
But yes, I agree with those above that you should wait until you've developed solid healthful eating habits and follow your surgeon and nutritionists post-op food stage diet, etc. before you even think about eating junk food--you might find that you don't want those Doritos anymore after a while.
You should also consider WHY you want those Doritos...and what caused you to gain weight in the first place. Emotional eating, volume eating, etc...it's important to know what got you to the point of needing weight loss surgery. Discuss this with your nutritionist, VSG support group, or maybe even a counselor.

A little bit of tough love here, but let's add things up: he's a drug user (yes, marijuana is a drug), he's cheated on you, he's emotionally abusive, he's controlling and doesn't want you to spend time with your family, he's a financial disaster, he'd rather you be big than thin, he's emotionally erratic, you're waiting for him to physically hurt you before you can divorce him, and you think giving him children will help things. Seriously, how many red flags do you need here?

A little bit of tough love here, but let's add things up: he's a drug user (yes, marijuana is a drug), he's cheated on you, he's emotionally abusive, he's controlling and doesn't want you to spend time with your family, he's a financial disaster, he'd rather you be big than thin, he's emotionally erratic, you're waiting for him to physically hurt you before you can divorce him, and you think giving him children will help things. Seriously, how many red flags do you need here?

Honey...the only reason you need to get a divorce is because you are not happy, which you obviously aren't. You can't save a marriage if one of the people in the marriage is not willing to work on the issues. The real issues are his cheating, drug use, and financial problems; you having surgery, being religious, and spending time with your family has nothing to do with it. He is insecure that when you lose the weight and start to get attention from other men, you will stray.
Just thank God that you are seeing him for what he is now vs 20 years and several children later. Find your HAPPY girl!!

I'm really sorry, I have never been married, but I did have an engagement fall through with a guy who was lying/cheating/etc and I know that the loss of someone you love can be an overwhelmingly hard thing, no matter how it ends. It sounds like the relationship you had was rather volatile at times. I hope you realize that despite anything he says, anything that happened, anything that does happen, that you deserve better than what you've been given.
You are still very young (We're actually the same age =p), and if you think back to 8 years ago, a lot has changed from then, right? A lot can happen in the next 8 years too, and maybe in those 8 years you will find more love and respect for yourself and possibly someone who will treat you with the respect you deserve.
There are days that I wonder what it would have been like if I had stayed with my ex-fiance, but I never regret what happened. I learned a lot about myself and what I want from my life, and I still have a number of years ahead of me - who knows what they hold.
If you ever need a friend to vent or a shoulder to cry on, you're welcome to message me. We all need a place/friends to talk to about our hard times.

Yeah, I agree...childbirth was worse. Wait...I think I wandered into the wrong forum...again!...ugh.
Damn, I'm so addicted to VST that I'll post on any thread...I'll leave this forum now. That is all.

A little bit of tough love here, but let's add things up: he's a drug user (yes, marijuana is a drug), he's cheated on you, he's emotionally abusive, he's controlling and doesn't want you to spend time with your family, he's a financial disaster, he'd rather you be big than thin, he's emotionally erratic, you're waiting for him to physically hurt you before you can divorce him, and you think giving him children will help things. Seriously, how many red flags do you need here?

A little bit of tough love here, but let's add things up: he's a drug user (yes, marijuana is a drug), he's cheated on you, he's emotionally abusive, he's controlling and doesn't want you to spend time with your family, he's a financial disaster, he'd rather you be big than thin, he's emotionally erratic, you're waiting for him to physically hurt you before you can divorce him, and you think giving him children will help things. Seriously, how many red flags do you need here?

A little bit of tough love here, but let's add things up: he's a drug user (yes, marijuana is a drug), he's cheated on you, he's emotionally abusive, he's controlling and doesn't want you to spend time with your family, he's a financial disaster, he'd rather you be big than thin, he's emotionally erratic, you're waiting for him to physically hurt you before you can divorce him, and you think giving him children will help things. Seriously, how many red flags do you need here?

A little bit of tough love here, but let's add things up: he's a drug user (yes, marijuana is a drug), he's cheated on you, he's emotionally abusive, he's controlling and doesn't want you to spend time with your family, he's a financial disaster, he'd rather you be big than thin, he's emotionally erratic, you're waiting for him to physically hurt you before you can divorce him, and you think giving him children will help things. Seriously, how many red flags do you need here?

Most of the support staff in my office are the unclassy, gossiping type of women who are all at least 30-50 pounds overweight. Even though I told no one at my office that I had surgery, I've already heard rumors that I used WLS.
So when they say it's an easy way out, I look at their waistline and say, "At least I found a way out."

Oh darn...when I saw the title as "Macho cheese Doritos" I got a little excited. Hehe. I thought maybe there was a new brand of Doritos targeted specifically for men or something. Well, it was probably just the word "Macho" that got my attention, if I have to be completely honest. :wub:
I assume that "Macho" was a result of some predictive autocorrect situation.
But yes, I agree with those above that you should wait until you've developed solid healthful eating habits and follow your surgeon and nutritionists post-op food stage diet, etc. before you even think about eating junk food--you might find that you don't want those Doritos anymore after a while.
You should also consider WHY you want those Doritos...and what caused you to gain weight in the first place. Emotional eating, volume eating, etc...it's important to know what got you to the point of needing weight loss surgery. Discuss this with your nutritionist, VSG support group, or maybe even a counselor.

:lol:
And on that note, it's time for the collection plate. Ahhhhhhhh-meeeeen.

Sweet baby jesus on the mountaintop...

Define "normally".

Not to be indelicate, but I'd love to be able to see my junk without a mirror.

Hehe, poisonous hissing queens......
Wow, from size 26 to size 18! Amazing. Just think you are able now to buy clothes in regular shops at large and XL size, right? You don't have to go to the Big Girls shops if you don't want to. Isn't that AMAZING!?!?! You've done it girl. Strut it. Let us be your supports and cheering section. Anyone for a pompom?

My weight loss is way beyond noticeable now (50 pounds in 6 weeks) And, ironically, most of the people in my office who have commented on my weight loss (in a good way) are the straight guys! Everyone knows I'm gay, so imagine my surprise. The women just gnash their teeth and look at me somewhat suspiciously. The other gay guys in the office are mostly of the "poisonous hissing queens" species, so I knew I'd get nothing from them except bitchy gossip behind my back. Go figure!

Define "not one person". Does that include your family and close friends? Did they know you were having surgery? Sometimes people shun the idea of WLS because they think it's the wrong choice, the "easy way out", etc. So maybe they're just bitter that you did it and it's working for you. Remember, at least you found a way out!

Swimming is amazing exercise! It will get you shredded. They don't call it a "swimmer's build" for nothing!
And if reading were cardio activity maybe this country would be more literate.