Lissa

I spent several hours last night talking to a guy who has lost 176 pounds with his sleeve about just this issue. He gave me a lot of tips for dealing with seeing myself as way bigger than I am (plus several compliments, lol). He said that looking at your own before/after pictures is a great thing to do, along with keeping a few clothing items from your biggest period and trying them on occasionally. He also told me that he still has days where he gets up and still thinks he's his former size. He calls them his "fat days". We got into lots of subjects, but this one is my bugaboo these days and it's the toughest one for me to wrap my head around. I still see Fat Lissa in the mirror, even though I'm down 110 pounds. One of my problems is that I tend to focus on the bad areas, like my tummy and loose arm skin, rather than seeing how far I've come. I'm still a work in progress, though, and it IS getting better.

Jazzmin, I was working out twice a day for a couple of months and my body hurt! I couldn't eat enough, sleep enough, or relax enough to quit aching. I was living on Icy Hot and hurting constantly. As soon as I stopped doing the double workouts, everything lined back up for me. I agree with changing things up. I lose when I eat more. I lose when I exercise less, then I'll lose when I do a killer workout for a few days. Once I started varying my routine, my weight loss restarted and has been steady again since.

It sounds to me like you're doing great. Keep up with the walking, add in some good carbs like PDXMan suggested and don't let the scale drive you crazy! That's what kids are for!

There is a search button in the upper right corner of the home page. Inside that search box is a drop down list where you can choose to search forums, members, etc. Or, you could just tell us her name and maybe we can point you to the proper person.

PKB, BiPap is a CPAP machine that has two pressures, one for when you are inhaling and one for when you are exhaling. For me, it made a huge difference in the clausterphobia from the mask. Since I have good insurance, my doctor made sure he set me up for the best machine he could get for me. My current pressure is 22/12, so it's really pushing air in when I inhale and then drops really low when I exhale. I use the full face mask, probably the same as yours. During my last sleep study, the tech tried to give me a nose only mask and I almost had a panic attack. I like being able to open my mouth if I need to without having air pushing out!

My whole BiPap fits into a custom made bag that's about the size of a briefcase. I can set it up or take it apart in less than 5 minutes, including putting water into the humidifier. Is mine unusually small compared to other machines? I use a ResMed machine.

(((Hugs))) You're having a normal reaction, especially when you add in the complication of reaction to the adhesive! I was lucky that I knew I was allergic to latex before I had my surgery, because I react exactly the way you are describing! You will NOT fail to lose weight. It will happen. Keep working toward your Protein and Water goals, but you should realize that those goals are super tough to reach this early post-op. You can't really eat anything because you are still on liquids or mushies at most. However, you should be doing all you can to get that water in so that you don't become dehydrated. I suggest that you stay OFF the scale. It will drive you nuts if you let it. Instead, take your measurements and compare them to your pre-op measurements, so that you have a record of how far you've come. Pay more attention to how your clothes fit and notice that they are getting looser in a hurry. The scale is just a number. Your clothes and measurements will tell you much more about your progress than that stupid scale ever will! Get up, get moving, do something, even if it's just walk around the house or up and down the hallway. Any amount of exercise will give you a serotonin boost that will improve your outlook on things. Good luck! You've done the hardest part and now you're on the way to a new and better you!

I had a sleep study pre-op because I was exhausted all the time and found myself falling asleep while driving. Being diagnosed with sleep apnea was actually a relief because I knew what was causing the problem. I'm 10.5 months out and still need my bi-pap machine, but I'd beat someone up who tried to take it away from me. I can definitely tell when I take the mask off in my sleep or don't use the machine because I'm very tired the next day. I have had a follow-up study done and it shows that I still need the machine or oxygen to sleep without problems. I'll keep the machine until I can bag it up and put it in the closet. Insurance has paid for mine in full, which is great because I will need it until goal, possibly a little longer, although my doc says that I won't be using it in six months for sure. As soon as I started using the BiPap, the swelling in my ankles went down and my energy level quadrupled. I've also now driving a 3,000 mile trip twice without issues with wanting to fall asleep while driving. And, yes, I hauled my machine with me and used it every single night.

(((Kimmy))) It is SO hard to deal with our parents being ill and dying, but it is a part of life for many of us, unfortunately. I hope you do get to go spend some time with him, for both of your sake's, during this part of his journey. This is some precious time for you both to share your love with one another. Alcohol, or any other negative addiction, can definitely grab you right now because you are vulnerable. As others have suggested (and you have mentioned), exercise is a much better addiction and will give you the energy you need to get through this time.

The pre-op liquid diet is hard, but it's worth it in the end. Hang tough and you will get through it. ((Hugs))

Awesome!! Congrats on that mini-goal!!

I just want to put in a plug for Fit Bit here! I bought mine in April and have worn it every single day since. Somehow, about 2 weeks ago, it decided to stop displaying my information. I contacted the company and they gave me good directions for how to reset my Fit Bit, but it never recovered. I waited until I came back from vacation to contact them again, thinking that it just needed time to recover. It didn't recover, so I emailed them and, after asking for a little information including my proof of purchase, they are sending me a brand new Fit Bit! I got the shipping confirmation today. I'm THRILLEd with their customer service and would highly recommend the Fit Bit to anyone who is considering the purchase!

Good job! The positive changes are already showing!!

You're doing what my girlfriends and I call "Ebay dating". Not everything you find there is going to be perfect for you, but you can learn something about the process from every encounter. Go on the date, enjoy your activity (dinner, movie, etc) and have some nice conversation. Go into it with the attitude that you'll make a new friend and you'll have a good time. If there is chemistry, that's fine. If not, that's fine too. It's okay if you aren't attracted to big men or short men or guys with gages in their ears. Everyone's preferences are different... I went on a date recently with a guy who likes his women BIG. He honestly told me that I'm not really big enough for him, so we haven't had a second date. I wasn't offended by his candor, although I did wonder where he was at when I was bigger! LOL Dating is an audition process. Just make sure they are auditioning for you, not the other way around!

Desirae, First, congrats on working so hard to get here! It takes a lot of inner strength to know yourself as well as you do! Second, yes, the pre-op diet is tough, but it is SO worth it. It helps your body and liver prepare for surgery and it helps you detox from bad things like sugar and caffeine. Believe me, you don't want to be going through those withdrawals post op along with the liquid diet! Third, I believe I know another girl that is in the same program, a young lady named Whitney. I'm not sure if you attend meetings as a group, but please say hello to her for me if you do. She's the daughter of an online friend I've known for nearly 20 years. Lastly, good luck on your journey!!!

MeMe, Unless you're doing something strange to your watermelon, it isn't too bad for you. It's high liquid content is great, too! Cheetos.. oh, my cheetos, how I crave thee. Someone told me about the single serving bags at walmart, so that's what I buy now, but I can only buy ONE at a time or they still cry out for me in the night. ::sigh::

I never liked any other flavor except coke. Good thing, or I'd have been even bigger than I was! LOL

The thought process you're all having is normal. Even the food funerals are normal, although they aren't really "good" for you. You WILL be able to eat what you want again. It will just be smaller portions than it is now. As for the fear, deal with what you can and let your higher power handle the rest. That's what I had to do, and I was totally convinced I'd die on the table because of all my co-morbidities. I survived and I'm a thousand percent healthier and happier than I was before.

The only ones I tolerate are Premier Protein (Sams and Costco sell them) and the Clif bars. I have to watch myself with the clif bars, though, because they are higher in calories and lower in protein, but they taste so good that I've made them a once a day treat.

DivaK, Your long-term success depends more on you than on the bougie. IF you're determined to keep the weight off, you will do it. The sleeve is an awesome tool, but it's just a tool. I love mine, don't get me wrong, but I know I have to do the head work and keep my head in the game in order to succeed long-term.

Storm, I'm the comic relief around here, I think. Besides, a little humor never hurt any of us... unless we're really early post-op!

Enid, Are you short? Our height affects the size of our sleeve as much as, maybe more than, the bougie size. A tall person, like me at 5'8, is going to have more capacity in the long run than a 5'0" tall person. That's because I have a longer stomach than a shorter person would have. If you're short, your doctor may have used a larger bougie in order to give you the same stomach capacity I get from a 32 bougie. BTW, the bougie is more of a guide for the surgeon's tool than anything else. The anesthetist runs the bougie tube down through your stomach and the surgeon uses it as a cutting guide. There are a couple of good videos that have been posted that are NOT of actual surgery. I watched them post-op and they are very interesting as far as understanding what has been done to us. Search for the word bougie and video on the main page and it will hopefully show you those posts.

Every time I see the word "bougie", I hear "Do the hustle!" I think I just dated myself horribly!

If you're having surgery on the 15th, you'll need to start a two week clear liquid diet on the 1st or 2nd. Truthfully, the clear liquid diet pre-op is the hardest part of this journey, IMO. You're going to have to psyche yourself up for it. Just remember that it's a short time of deprivation in order to improve your health and appearance 100%. Stick to your doctor's plan, but ask for a specific menu plan. I was allowed things on my diet that others weren't, and denied things that others were allowed to have. Good luck! I'm an August Sleever too (2011).

If it makes you feel any better, I walked around with that charlie horse feeling for 4 days before I went to the doctor. A nurse friend told me that I could eliminate a clot because I could bend my foot up toward my leg without horrible pain. She was wrong. Don't let your leg bother you for tonight since your doc checked it out today, but be concerned if the pain isn't gone in the morning. In the meantime, you could do RICE to it... rest, ice, elevation and I THINK the C stands for compression, but one of the medical people will have to help me on that one. Do not massage the area if you truly suspect a clot.. .and there's no reason you can't go to the ER if it has you truly panicked. I'd rather have the issue resolved than walk around in a state of paranoia. Let us know how it turns out, please?