Secret Or Not? What To Do!

regardless of what they may think, you ARE doing this ON YOUR OWN. just because a surgical procedure happens does not mean you are not putting in hard work or struggling.

i have crazy judgemental family too. they would be more trouble than it is worth. let them see the progress with their own eyes. you are working for it either way! screw em!

Thanks! That is true, I just have to keep that frame of mind!

I am not a fan of crazy mean family and coworkers.

Thanks for the pep talk.

will they do the sleeve at the same time as band removal? it'd be less risky to go under less times... ? maybe? lol

I want to say first & foremost, there are so many people the Lapband has failed. You, like me, blamed myself. If it was such a success rate, there would not be so many complaints about it. It has been successful for some but STOP blaming yourself. I had mine removed last week and got Sleeved same surgery. I was excited about my Band at the time and being a transparent person, I shared what I was going to do.....then later felt like a public failure. This time, I did not do that. I told 5 friends and my family. I told my friends to NOT share it with anyone and eventually I will in my own time. My point, I set my parameters. So if you tell no one but your husband & your bff, it is your right. People are used to me being transparent and I'm used to being transparent but I told myself, I will share when I am ready. I need to see success and plus not feel the self inflicted great expectations of others. Good luck.

You didn't fail and shouldn't feel bad about what's happened, the procedure failed you and not the other way around. :-)

I've had a rough experience with the sleeve, started out @ 347, was down to 331 the day of surgery and couldn't get under 314 for months. Even now I can't manage to break 300 and it's been almost 6 months since surgery. I didn't tell anyone I was having WLS except my daughter and a very few close friends- 2. Even so, I've been embarressed by the miserable failure I feel my surgery has been and wish nobody knew. Who wants to have weight loss surgery and still be fat?! lol Because of complications with the sleeve, it has been recommended to me to have gastric bypass as a second step or even duodenal switch. My head is still swimming and I haven't made a decision but I can tell you this much- if I decided to go through another procedure, I wouldn't tell anyone. When you feel like a failure the first time after all the hard work, positivity and high expectations, it can make you super wary to talk about it the second time. Good for you for making the right decision for you and taking control back of your weight loss journey!

I haven't told anyone but my bf and my hairstylist. I'm usually an open book, but for some reason I don't want to share with anyone right now. It's my body, my business.

Thanks guys! I think I have made up my mind to share in time. I also appreciate everyone sharing their story and what they have gone through, it helps to know that I am not the only one. I don't feel like such a failure now, I feel good about myself and my journey so far.

I get the removal of the band on the 7th and 6 weeks later I get sleeved.

Really thanks to all of you! I love this site!

Jsd2- Keep a positive fame of mind and go back to the basics. Good luck with everything!

I want to say first & foremost, there are so many people the Lapband has failed. You, like me, blamed myself. If it was such a success rate, there would not be so many complaints about it. It has been successful for some but STOP blaming yourself. I had mine removed last week and got Sleeved same surgery. I was excited about my Band at the time and being a transparent person, I shared what I was going to do.....then later felt like a public failure. This time, I did not do that. I told 5 friends and my family. I told my friends to NOT share it with anyone and eventually I will in my own time. My point, I set my parameters. So if you tell no one but your husband & your bff, it is your right. People are used to me being transparent and I'm used to being transparent but I told myself, I will share when I am ready. I need to see success and plus not feel the self inflicted great expectations of others. Good luck.

I never saw myself as transparent until you described yourself this way. While honesty is admirable, being completely transparent is not! It takes more strength to keep some things private. I need to set parameters also. Your comment made me see something about myself that I hadn't considered before! Thank you!

The fact of the matter is that even in my office where there are 7 others that have had WLS, every time I've mentioned looking into WLS I get these looks and attitude. It seems a little strange that people I consider friends aren't supportive. why would anyone else be? I keep getting the lecture: you can do it on your own, your not THAT fat, you just need to exercise, etc. etc. I can't do it on my own, I am over 90lbs over my goal weight and that's not even as low as "modern medicine" says I should be, I DO excercise and even eat right... so...

Honestly, I plan to tell everyone I'm taking a vacation.

Regardless, it's a personal decision. My husband knows because he'll be my ride home. One of my children knows. i don't know if I'm telling anyone else. I suppose we will figure it out as we go along.

Good luck to you in this leg of your journey!

TLP, I feel ya. Everyone seems to have to give their 2 cents about ME being able to lose weight. I can be here for you, friend me and we can chat through all of this! I really need support since I have decided that I am telling everyone I am going deer hunting with my husband the week I am off work!

a forty pound loss is amazing. the fact that you have decided you need another tool to continue in this journey is admirable. i would only tell people that are going to support you. as far as anyone else is concerned, the weight loss that will continue will be from using weight loss tools. this journye is yours and only yours. enjoy.

I didn't tell anyone. Except my close family. I glad a did. It is no ones business. And everyone seems to have a opinion they feel you want to hear. Good luck on your journey!

Thanks Everyone, you guys are great!