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I'll make my own luck

A blog by makemyownluck in General

  • Entries

    27

  • Comments

    87

  • Views

    11841

About this blog

I'll make my own luck, a weight loss surgery blog by makemyownluck on BariatricPal. 27 entries on surgery, recovery and progress.

Entries in this blog

I think I'll always be fat.

I think I'll always be fat.   I'm actually okay with that.   I was near 500lbs when I started this journey. My physical ability was nearly non-existent. Had I not had my sleeve, I would probably need motorized cars at stores at this point.   I've lost over 150lbs. My lowest weight was 317 at 2 years post op, and then.... I got pregnant!   See, life changed completely after my sleeve.   I had been perpetually single for 5+ years during the prime of my life - late 20s - early 30s. I got

12 weeks post op update..

Post-op life has been incredible so far. Even when I was in the hospital right after surgery, I was so positive. I was so thankful to the nurses, doctors and hospital staff - and I told them so endlessly - that many of them told me that I was the sweetest patient they'd had in a long time. Why? Because I was so thankful to be alive, to be doing okay (in pain, but no complications), to have them helping me, to know that IT WAS DONE... I just couldn't help but want to thank each of them so much fo

1st day back at work

I had surgery exactly 2 wks ago today. I can't help but think I'm jumping the gun going back to work (this coming from the woman who asked her surgeon if it was possible to get back to work in ONE week, now suddenly I wish I had two more weeks!). I had mush brain for most of the afternoon. I had to sit through a reallllly stupid meeting for an hour and a half this morning and I basically spent the entire day resisting the urge to run out of the building and never come back.   I don't know if

10 days down, a lifetime to go

May 2nd seems like such a long time ago. When I think of how I was feeling that day and how I feel today, it truly makes me so proud of my body. My body that I've abused with a lifetime of overeating. My body that had to wait patiently for years for my mind to realize it was time to make a change. My body that has recovered so beautifully and allowed me to be as comfortable as possible through every last thing I've put it through. I could cry. For the first time ever, I love my body.   The da

one week away...

I was talking to my mom today about surgery day. We're a week away. In a week, I'll either be walking the halls, knocked out on pain meds or somewhere in between - and I'll be sleeved.   I've gone from giddy with excitement to tense with worry and I've settled on "optimisticly curious". I wonder.   What will I feel like the day of surgery? Man, I hope I'm one of those champs that's moving around and feeling okay right away. What will I feel like when I'm out of the hospital? How long til

the weeks to come

I'm in the final stretch. I'm ending Day 2 of the pre-op liquid diet. Tomorrow, I'll be 12 days away from surgery. I'm officially counting down!   I'm really not hungry on the diet. Well, tonight I was feeling it a little - but only a tiny bit, so I just had a shake and I was fine. I'm not saying it will continue to be easy, but so far it's been fine. I started working my way into the liquid diet last weekend by having shakes but also one yogurt a day as well. Since Sunday, I've lost 13lbs. I

nerves

I start my 2 week liquid pre-op diet on Thursday. I'm going to sort of ease myself into the liquid diet starting today. I had a strawberry body fortress shake instead of eggs and meatless sausage for breakfast. (I made mine with unsweetened almond milk and a splash of vanilla creamer - the creamer makes it SO MUCH BETTER), I'm having yogurt and maybe a cheese stick for lunch. And I have some Gardein Turk'y that I'll have for dinner with some asparagus. Then a shake if I'm hungry later.   Sinc

miserable day...

Well, after all this hoop jumping, I'm finally scheduled for May 2nd surgery. It's all tentative pending the insurance approval, of course. I should be jumping for joy, right?   Unfortunately, no.   My support system through this whole process has been my parents. I've been counting on my mom to help take care of me the first few days home. Well, Friday when we were at the surgeons office, the fight of the century started...   The doctor answered our questions then advised that one of h

pffffftttttt.....

The insurance coordinator at the hospital called me today to discuss my HMOs requirements for bariatric surgery. I meet it all except one part:   "Medical documentation that the member has failed a medically supervised weight reduction program for a duration of at least 18 consecutive months"   I don't have 18 consecutive months of supervised diet. At best, I have 6 months.   Lucky for me, this week is my open enrollment week at work to switch to PPO coverage. The change would be in effect

2013

IDK how far I'm ever going to get in this journey. After my disaster of a consult at the beginning of December, I've been going back and forth with my insurance on getting approved to see a different surgeon, and to say it's been an uphill battle is putting it mildly. I can resume this battle on Thursday since my MD's office is closed until then. I'm not looking forward to it at all. I really had no idea it would be this difficult to get to the operating table - I'm starting to think I never wil

not yet.

What an emotional day.   Went to my surgeon appointment today. After waiting AN HOUR past my appointed time, I was taken to a room where I waited another 30m to see the surgeon. She was a bit curt, in my opinion, but my mom said "She was just being a doctor."   The good news is that I've lost 12lbs in the last month. Considering I have been sick and not been to the gym in two weeks and Thanksgiving came and went in the last month, I'm pretty excited to see some weight loss. It makes me won

Rewards...

Still in pre-opVILLE - I go to my seminar on Monday. I really hope to learn more about the time frame for everything soon!!   I'm a list maker by nature. Since all I can think about lately is my weight loss plan, I've made a list of NSVs I hope to achieve, and made some rewards to go along with them for motivation. I also made a list of scale related victories and rewards for that. Not sure if everyone does this, or just makes one list or the other, or doesn't make a list of rewards - but I'm

Vsg Consult Approved!

So after going all weekend thinking I was going to have to settle for RNY because of my insurance, I got the happy news today that I have been referred to a new surgeon that does VSG. HOORAY!! *happy dance*   I have been referred to Dr. Ayloo at UIC. Anyone familiar with her? I'm going to the required informational seminar on 11/5 at 5pm. Any other Chicago area people going to this seminar? I'd love to meet you!!   I'm back on cloud 9. Now, I just have to hope that all the pre-op stuff I've

Lost

I found out this morning that I was approved for a referral to see a surgeon for weight loss surgery. I was able to celebrate this "first submission approval" for approximately 30 minutes.   I called the MD, made an appointment, and then the woman who scheduled my appointment called me back to advise that the surgeon does not do VSG surgery, he only does RNY and lap band.   So, I called my MD office and talked to the girl who does the referral submissions, and said, "Hey, the surgeon doesn'

Submitting To Insurance! :)

Well, it looks like there's a chance I could get referred to surgery sooner than I expected!!! I had been planning on having surgery at the beginning of next year, but I saw my doctor today and he said he was going to submit the referral this week and see what they say!   My insurance requires a 3 month supervised diet, but my MD doesn't have a scale that can weigh me, so he's gonna see if we can bypass that requirement and get me referred now. If not, I only have another 5 weeks until my 3 mo

Crankerpants.

There is only one word for my mood lately: crankerpants. It's that "I'm super cranky, so if you talk to me, I'm probably gonna be a snarky b***h" type of feeling that I'm not so sure everyone experiences. I've made a bunch of changes to my diet, and been really terrible at sticking to it. Seems I can go pretty good for about 3 days and then BAM I find myself finishing off a bowl of pasta or rolling through McD's for a breakfast sandwich. But overall, I think I'm doing okay. I mean, for those 3 d

Baby Steps...

I've been trying to implement change in my life. It hasn't been easy. My sub-conscious isn't going down without a fight! It's been really hard to fight the urge for carbs, but I took a huge step today by eliminating most of them from my cabinets.   I did some shopping over the weekend and again, it was really hard to fight the carb monster. Oh, my favorite macaroons are fresh out of the oven? NO! RESIST! Free sample of my favorite pizza? STOP!! GET AWAY FROM ME!! Toaster Strudel on sale!? YOU

Waiting To Exhale...

I got my psych eval today. A nice little letter to say I have no mental disorders... kinda want to have that framed. For reference. To remind myself I'm sane. To prove such to others who know me and doubt that.   Went to my PCP yesterday for a routine visit and my bp is finally under control. Halleloo for that! Had a pap that wasn't as embarrassing or as torturous as I thought it might be.   My PCP said my insurance will want 3 months of supervised diet. But because he doesn't have a scale

Just Another Day...

Tomorrow is my birthday.   I've been very sad lately, thinking about the life I've wasted. My best friend is in a hospital right now literally watching her mother die. She would give anything for one more good day, and here I sit, wasting my life. Hiding myself because I'm too embarrassed of my appearance to embrace this life I've been blessed with.   I remember on my 23rd birthday getting up and ready to go out to dinner with my parents. That day, I had no pants that I fit into. I had not

Ready, Set, Go

So, I have my first NUT visit on Tuesday. Tuesday will also by me 32nd birthday. Should be an interesting day...   I've been food diary'ing per the instructions from the scheduler when I made my appointment. She said do it for a few days, I went ahead and started doing it last Tuesday so I could show her a whole week.   What I've learned (well, what I kinda knew) is that I eat a lot of crap. Things that just aren't good. I always thought doing a food journal was a dumb idea. but really it

Irony

So, I was sitting at work today and as my shift was winding down, found myself daydreaming about VSG again. I got to thinking (and worrying myself) about post-op living and long term care. Would I require b12 shots for the rest of my life? will I ever be able to eat sugar again? what about reflux? will I have unending reflux that requires lifelong treatment? Am I putting myself at risk for complications that far surpass the initial post-op recovery stage? what am I really thinking about doing to

It's Too Early To Be Overwhelmed Or Impatient...

Patience has never been a virtue of mine.   I'm already feeling a bit overwhelmed by this process. I'm starting to get the feeling that I'm doing the wrong things and that I'm wasting a lot of good money on all this medical stuff and I'll just have to start back at square one when I (hopefully, finally) get to a bariatric surgeon. So many, many steps. I just hope it's not all in vain.   Guess I'm just feeling a little down lately. It's CRIMSON TIDE time, so I'm sure that has something to d

Appointments, Appointments And More Appointments...

I've made a gajillion phone calls in the last 2 weeks, I think! I really just wanna get this show on the road so I can get referred for a surgical consult.   I had a Dr. visit today. This was follow up for my visit 2 weeks ago when my bp was way high and he put me on meds, I've been taking them as prescribed and they're working. He says he'd like it to be a little lower, but that it's better (I was 138/80, down from 162/92 2 weeks ago. Yay drugs!). So we talked more about surgery and I swear I

Seein The Doctor Tomorrow...

...to check my bp, remove a mole, and let him know I have the appointment with the dietitian.   hopefully all goes well.   also, I want to ask him which hospital I would be referred to or if I get to choose. In outside of Chicago and there's lots of options, and I have NO idea how to choose which one to go to... too bad they're all equally far away and inconvenient for me! Convenience is hardly a factor!   anyway, hopefully I'll have more answers tomorrow about the steps and how long it co

Snowball - Post 3

I felt like I got nothing done at work today. I kept getting up to make phone calls, it was so frustrating. After three days and multiple attempts, I finally got through to the scheduler for the dietitian my PCP referred me to. The earliest they could get me in was August 22nd at 1:30, which happens to be the day after my birthday. They told me to chart my food intake as accurately as possible for a few days before the visit and that's about it. I asked if they had a high capacity scale, and was

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