My name is AJ and I’m a scale-a-holic.
I have lied to my LBT friends, it wasn’t intentional… I don’t know how it got so out of control.
You see in the beginning I only weigh myself once a week, but back then I was seeing my doctor every week or two. Now I go every 4-6 weeks and that will get stretched out more. When I weigh in at my doctor’s office, that is my ‘official’ weight, I update my profile based on that. So when I weigh at home it doesn’t officially count….
Like I said I started weighting once a week, I even had a set day (Sunday morning). Then I started ‘just checking’ on Wednesdays, then Fridays too and before I knew it I was weighting every day. Then it was twice a day, once in the morning & once in the evening (just to see if there was a difference). It wasn’t my ‘official weight’ so what harm is there…..
Well my scale died last night. Yep after ten plus years it went kaput. My beloved scale was no more. Panic set in, how am I going to weigh myself in the morning? Where can I get a new scale and fast….
Boy was I in a panic! I searched on line all evening, need to find a good scale and fast. Thankfully, I go to the doctors tomorrow and will get an ‘official’ weight.
But in the mean time I realize that I have an addiction that I need to manage. The first step in the detoxing is cold turkey. I found the scale I want on Amazon, ordered it & selected Super Saving Shipping (It wound get here till next week). Next, if I have to I’ll have my husband lock it up….hopefully that won’t be necessary. lol
This weekend my husband & I went to Lubbock, Texas for the Wine Chocolate Fantasia at Llano Estacado Winery. This is an annual event and is both a fund raiser for the ACF Texas Panhandle Chefs de Cuisine and the West Texas Parkinsonism Society; as well as a chocolate competition. There are entries from amateurs, professionals and chefs. The evening includes many of Llano Estacado’s wines for sampling.
It was quite enjoyable hanging around barrels of aging wine, sampling some interesting chocolate creations and sipping on my favorite wines.
I consumed about 800 calories this evening; pure sugar and fat calories. My total calories for the day were 1600. I am at goal and that is the only reason I chose to attend this event. I would never recommend anyone still losing to attempt managing an evening like this. I don’t know the actual calorie count for the chocolate I sampled nor do I know their actual weight so I took my best guess.
Why am I telling you about this? Two reasons; it was fun and I want to share my experience managing the maintenance lifestyle. I know that I am going to attend things where the only choice is wasted calories, full of fat. As long as I stay in moderation I will be successful.
I planned for this event I knew I would be eating chocolate and drinking wine. I knew about how much I wanted to have before I arrived and I stuck to that. The evening was an absolute blast.
This article went out to all 3,000 employees at my state agency. Guess everyone knows now.
Surgical maneuver: Amanda changes course with weight loss surgery
Weight loss surgery is simply a cosmetic issue; it’s taking the easy way out. Amanda is witness to the fallacy of these notions. Candidates for surgery have exhausted other means of weight loss and are at risk of illnesses that can be life threatening. And treatment does not end with surgery. Success demands from patients a long-term commitment to a healthy lifestyle.
For Amanda, weight loss surgery afforded her the opportunity to make the necessary and permanent change in her life that other methods had failed to do. Her body mass index was in the severe range. The three medicines she was taking were not stabilizing her high blood pressure. And Amanda’s doctor had diagnosed her as prediabetic.
Amanda recalls, “I couldn’t even walk up five stairs to get into the building without [being winded]. Medically, I was completely unhealthy. And I had to do something to change that.”
Choosing the right course
Of the three main types of weight loss surgery, Amanda opted for the least invasive: laparoscopic gastric banding. She was concerned that sleeve gastrectomy, which involves removing about 75 percent of the stomach, is too new a procedure and is irreversible. And gastric bypass surgery, although more common, is also considered to be irreversible and has a higher risk of nutritional deficiency. Gastric bypass surgery involves sealing off the upper part of the stomach and connecting it to the lower part of the small intestine. Thus food skips part of the digestive tract, and the body absorbs fewer calories.
Amanda chose laparoscopic gastric banding (lap bad surgery) not only because it is the least invasive but also because it is reversible and involves routine checkups. A band is placed near the top of the stomach and is inflated with a saline solution to create a pouch, or kind of funnel. When a patient eats, the pouch fills up with food much sooner than the entire stomach would. As a result, the patient feels full sooner. The food also takes longer to pass into the lower part of the stomach, which increases the amount of time that the patient feels satisfied between meals.
The band is adjustable, allowing doctors to routinely evaluate and optimize its effectiveness. A tube runs from the band to an access port — a small, discreet incision under the skin on the patient’s stomach. The doctor inserts a needle into the port to add saline solution to the band. The solution tightens the band, which shrinks the size of the opening from the upper stomach to the lower stomach and so reduces the patient’s food consumption. The port can also be used to remove solution from the band if the band is too tight to allow food to move through the digestive tract or is causing problems, such as pain or vomiting. Regular checkups enable the doctor to find and maintain the “green zone,” the most effective opening size for the patient.
The journey has just begun
Amanda’s surgery was successful, but it was just the beginning. For the first two weeks after the operation, she could consume only clear liquids. She graduated to full liquids for the following two weeks. Only then could she move on to the luxury of mushy foods.
Recalling her trial by diet, she says, “The first two weeks, [you’re not so hungry] because your stomach is full, and you don’t have an appetite. But once the swelling went down, the hunger returned with a vengeance.”
Amanda did eventually get to move on to solid foods, but in order to avoid discomfort or potential problems, such as band slippage, she has had to adopt strict eating habits. She eats only about a cup of food per meal, which she serves on a side dish to appear more abundant. She chews her food very well, about 20 or 30 chews, before swallowing, and she must wait at least a minute between bites. She downloaded an app to help her time her bites.
“The idea is that it takes you about 20 or 30 minutes to eat your meal. And then you’re full. If you follow those protocols, nine times out of ten you have no problem. Most complications are from patients’ not following the guidelines and not changing their eating habits.”
Band or no band, most anyone would likely benefit from those eating practices.
Steady as she goes
Referencing Leslie Mitchell’s comment in a recent article about the Calorie Counter app, Amanda notes that surgery, like the app or any weight loss tool, is not a magic wand. The surgery helped Amanda lose 80 pounds in a year, but its success depended on her discipline to consistently make healthy choices, a discipline that
she must enforce for the rest of her life.
Amanda now exercises daily. Not only did she overcome those five steps that used to wind her entering the building, but she now climbs the stairs to her office each morning…on the eighth floor! And sometimes, she makes the trip more than once a day.
“My exercise is walking. I don’t do gyms,” she laughs.
Once a month, Amanda meets with a support group. Fellow members, who have all had lap band surgery, offer emotional and moral support as well as exchange recipes and ideas.
Amanda also strictly monitors the food she eats. Since she is eating less food, she must ensure that every bite packs a nutritional punch.
“I eat high protein — three to four ounces of protein per meal; then, veggies. Then if I’m still hungry, I add the carbohydrates. But most carbohydrates give you energy but don’t fill you. They make you hungry, especially…non-complex carbohydrates….If I’m going to eat something, I’m going to make sure it’s worth my while.”
She’s even been known to turn down a piece of chocolate these days. Her rationale: A piece of chocolate may be only 45 calories, but that’s 45 calories of mostly empty nutritional value.
The surgery, she explains, “doesn’t change the type of food you put in your mouth. You have to control that. Ice cream will go straight down — [the band] is a funnel. For a lot of the people who aren’t successful, it’s because they don’t change their eating habits. It’s the same with any of the surgeries. Like with the bypass — some people lose all this weight and then just gain it right back.”
Although her new diet is strict, Amanda can still enjoy the occasional treat. “It all boils down to calories in versus calories out. It depends on how physical I am,” she explains. Eloquently articulating her new outlook, she says, “Now I eat to fuel the body and not the obsession.”
Balancing the costs
Unfortunately, costs for lap band surgery can be prohibitive. The procedure is expensive, and the amount of insurance coverage depends on the plan. To qualify under many plans, an individual must have a body mass index (BMI) of 35 or greater and two comorbid conditions, such as high blood pressure and prediabetes. Currently, the state of Texas plan uses a higher BMI minimum and includes some additional requirements. Naturally, other costs can include deductibles and copays. Individuals interested in weight loss surgery should consult their provider for details.
The initial expense may be high, but the investment is sound. Weight loss surgery can be a valuable tool in promoting healthy lifestyles and likely reducing the high costs of long-term medical care. In addition, investing in healthy individuals can, as this agency has recognized with its successful wellness program, yield solid returns for all.
Many of you know my story, banded February 2012, reached my goal weight in December 2012 and have been trying to maintain that weight since. Many of you say I’m a success and look to me for advice & guidance.
My biggest fear with this journey has been gaining my weight back once I reached my goal. I never feared the surgery or the weight loss; I knew I could do it. But, could I handle maintaining this weight for the rest of my life?
Tonight, I failed. I failed myself, I failed my band and I failed my family. I am so disgusted with myself that I want to hide in a corner so no one will know…..
But, I must face it and confess.
I had purchased a box of chocolate drumstick ice cream cones for my step daughter this weekend. She ate 1; tonight I ate the other 9. YES 9! At 170 calories that is 1, 530 calories in less than 1 hour. One right after the other, big bites shoving them down as fast as I wanted. The band didn’t stop me, in fact it didn't make a sound, let me gobble away a lot of hard work.
I write this confession with tears running down my face. I feel like a complete and utter failure. I knew I would f** it up and I did. I can’t even tell you why I ate them. My evening routine was no different than any other night, wasn’t bored or depressed or stressed. I saw the box, opened one knowing darn well I shouldn’t and then the only thing that stopped me was getting to the bottom of the box. I honestly wished to get sick so I would stop.
It was complete sabotage. I was trying to failure. I have to face this and stop it. I do not want to gain weight, I do not want to binge eat like this and have this sick feeling.
I had to make myself write this blog, I had to face up to it. This is the only way to grow and learn. I am only human doing the best I can. I will put this behind me and move on.
I am so sick of playing by the band rules; I just want to break one or two of them. Eat a big huge meal, take big bites, or wolf food down in ten minutes flat.
Wish I could have a break and not think about my food choices, my portion size, how I eat, my water intake, and exercise, ugh….
Calgon take me away!
Do you feel that way some days? I’m sure we all do. So how do we get past this?
There are some who have reached their goal and have been maintaining for years. They say they think like a thin person. They never think of food.
Will I ever be like that?
I reached my goal in December and have been maintaining since then.
Has it been easy? NO.
It has been the most difficult part of my journey so far. But, I won’t give up because I look in the mirror and I really like the person that looks back at me.
So, I will continue to play the game. I will make health food choices, take small bites (hubby calls them band-bites), drink water and exercise. I will do this for the rest of my life because I am worth it!
Today I look at my life and I am thankful. I am thankful for my loving family. I am thankful for a good job and a steady income. I am thankful for my Lapband and for getting my life back.
I look at who I was 18 months ago, 250 pounds of misery. I didn’t care about myself or how I looked. I would wear potato sack clothes, I never wore make-up or jewelry, I looked like a tired old lady and I didn’t care. I couldn’t exercise, just walking up the 4 steps into my house would put me out of breath. I really hated myself!
Thankfully I did something about it. I got the Lapband and lost 80 pounds. I went from size 22 to size 10 and have never felt better. I take pride in the clothes I wear (no more potato sacks for me ~ I hate baggy clothes now, lol), I love to wear jewelry and make-up. I want to look good, my smile is from ear to ear. Life is so enjoyable now.
So many things have opened up to me since my band. My husband and I have doubled the amount of land we use for gardening because I can physically help manage it. We increased our flock of chickens to 30 birds because I can physically help manage them. I find myself always on the go, moving doing this & that because I can physically do it. I even got my concealed handgun license (Never shot a gun before 6 months ago).
All this because I decided to change. Yes, I changed everything….. No more fast food, soda, junk food, midnight bowls of cereal, or gallons of ice cream and no more sitting on my ass watching TV all day. Do I miss these things? Sometimes. But if I have cravings I have a small portion of whatever I’m craving. Day to day I don’t miss a thing.
Life is too precious to waste it away on pizza and greasy burgers or cake and candy. I am thankful for my rebirth on February 6, 2012 and I promise to live a health happy life. I deserve nothing less.
I have not been around as much lately and several LBT friends have asked why……
I was banded in February of 2012, lost 80 pounds in 10 months and have maintained that weight until I had a tummy tuck on Halloween…
After the surgery I had 2 drains, they were removed after 2 weeks. Within 5 days, my tummy filled up with fluid and my doctor drained it (this is like drilling for oil with a really BIG needle….. not fun!). Within about 5 days my tummy was full again so my doctor put a drain back in. The next week the area above my belly button filled up with fluid and I had another drain put in just below my bra line.
About a week later I had the upper drain removed & that issue was resolved, BUT….
I was still accumulating over 50cc of fluid a day from my lower drain. Doc said the magic number was less than 20cc a day for 2 days in a row, well that wasn’t happening. So on Monday doc flushed Ethanol thru the tubing of my drain into the pocket in my tummy (100cc total). This is supposed to irritate the area between my skin & abdomen wall and cause it to stick together. Today (Thursday) I am still getting 30cc of fluid a day from my drain…… I go back to the doctor Monday.
My options are, do the flush again and if that doesn’t work…..another surgery. Ugh
Complications happen, I know that. But, how has this affected me mentally? Well, I can’t exercise (every time I do the amount of fluid goes up), I can’t go in my hot tub with my husband (open incision), Have this glamorous drain to carry around in my pocket….. IT SUCKS!
And I have gotten very depressed over it. I have disconnected from my life lines (Local support group, LBT wait I mean Bariatric Pal, and my family) Yes I looked to food for comfort. (We won’t even add the holidays on top of all this….)
So you wonder….how is my weight? I am about 10 pound over my original goal weight (I weigh between 177-180, depends on the day). But even more important is how I am mentally? I will be honest, I am struggling. I am pissed, why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this? WHY? Oh WHY? OH WHY????? Full on pitty me party here!!!!
This is my confession, I am not the perfect role model. I struggle, I have pitty me parties, I ask why me…… and so I stayed away from my support. Too many people saw me as inspiration. How can I be inspiration when I am like this????
I am taking my complications day by day. I am not giving up (& yes the tummy tuck was worth it). I just don’t think I can motivate anyone right now.
To having a Lapband….
Well there are Dr. O’Brien’s eight golden rules.
1, Eat three or less small meals per day
2. Do not eat anything between meals
3. Eat slowly and stop when no longer hungry
4. Focus on nutritious foods
5. Avoid calorie-containing liquids
6. Exercise for at least 30 minutes every day
7. Be active throughout the day
8. Always keep in contact with your aftercare specialist
And there are the basic band eating rules.
1. Small bites
2. Chew until mushy
3. Eat slow (wait about 1 minute between bites)
After this it starts to get foggy, many doctors with many different opinions and advise.
There is:
1. Don’t drink while eating
2. No carbonated drinks
3. No straws
4. No NSAIDS
5. No alcohol
So what do you do? Who is right?? Every doctor is different. An example is let’s compare my doctor and my good friend CalorinaGirl’s doctor:
Drinking while eating:
My doctor says it’s fine as long as you wait the minute between bites & sips. CG doctor says NO drinking while eating and wait 30 minutes after you eat.
Carbonated drinks:
My doctor says if you want that’s fine but he sees most patients prefer not to because of the discomfort in drinking the carbonation. CG doctor says NO.
Straws
My doctor says if you want and it doesn’t bother you, fine. (I use a straw on occasion). CG doctor says NO.
NSAIDS
My doctor says Yes. CG doctor says NO.
Alcohol
My doctor says count the calories. CG doctor says prefer not, but if so use sparingly.
I would say that both CG & I have been successful with our banded journeys, we both follow our band rules (doctor’s orders) and have seen the results.
So who is right????? YOUR DOCTOR IS RIGHT! That is the person you put your money and life into so why not trust them?
My point is this journey is not cut and dry, black and white. This journey is what you make of it. Trust in your doctor and listen to them. Make your choices based on that.
I was banded a little over a year ago, I've lost over 80 pounds and I am at my goal weight. I also drink wine every evening. I don’t hide this from anyone. I have posted such information several times and when I get PM’d about it I answer honestly.
I knew when I decided to get the band that I would have to change my life and I was more than willing to do just that. But, I was not willing to give up my wine. I enjoy wine, I like the taste. My husband & I often go wine tasting at some of the Texas wineries. So, I decided that wine was going to be a part of my lifestyle.
From day one (& before) I have enjoyed my evening wine. Yes, the evening of my surgery I had a glass.
I count the empty calories (110 calories for 5oz of wine, approximately) and I am careful. I know that wine relaxes the band right along with you. So if you drink too much and the munchies set in…..everything will go down & then some.
I am responsible with my wine. I don’t drink for the effect of the alcohol. I drink wine because of the taste.
You wonder, does my doctor know? Of course he does, I tell my doctor everything. Hiding information from your doctor only hurts you.
My thoughts are this, if you have something you love and you can manage it then you should enjoy it. Make it a part of your plan. I have a friend that has a treat once a week of their favorite fast food meal, and another who has a single serving bag of Cheetos every day. Depriving yourself will not work. If you are anything like me, you will get resentful and end up splurging and hating yourself after.
Enjoy your love, just manage it and you will succeed.
This weekend brought an end to the preserving of my spring/summer garden (except for the okra which will produce thru September). It was a good year:
137 pounds of Zucchini (15 plants)
104 pounds of Yellow Squash (15 plants)
30 ½ pounds of Patty Pan Squash (5 plants)
43 ½ pounds of cucumbers (5 plants)
73 pounds of Tomatoes (10 plants)
4 bushels of pears (2 trees)
I spent the summer preserving all this every way I could: pickles, relishes, preserves, marmalades, minced meat, pie fillings, canned tomatoes, canned pears, frozen roasted tomatoes, frozen squash, casseroles, zucchini bread, zucchini cake, zucchini hummus, zucchini cobbler (tastes like apple!)… You name it! It’s been nonstop!!
What does this have to do with the band? You wonder…… EVERYTHING!
Pre band I could not have done a fourth of what I did this summer. I couldn’t cook dinner in the summer without sweating like a pig. I would have a towel around my neck wiping the sweat off my face before it dripped into the pan (for reals!). I would have to sit down every five minutes because my back was hurting. I hated working in the kitchen and doing anything outside forget it.
My husband use to do all the work on the land, I couldn’t physically help him…..
I don’t exercise, I hate the gym and any formal exercise routine. It’s never worked for me….. but I move. I move all the time. I walk and take the stairs as much as I can at work. Every day when I get home I have to feed the chickens, pick produce from the garden, pull weeds, etc. And the weekends are full of chores too, cleaning chicken coops, mowing lawns, pulling more weeds, building goat shelters….
I have so much energy now that all this work is nothing, just life on my farm. Just last night my husband asked me…
“So what is my zucchini mama gonna do next?”…….hummmmm
I have thought about writing this blog all day long. Part of me says don’t write it, you are a success and you don’t want people thinking you slip up and fail. The other part of me says write this, maybe this will tell others that this journey is not easy and even after reaching goal & being declared a success you still struggle…
‘The other part’ won, so here goes….
I have always been called strong, never showing my weakness or emotions. It is a skill I learned early in life, build a protective barrier around you so no one can know how you feel or hurt you. The way I coped with this barrier was with food, it got me to 250 pounds….
When I started my weight loss journey I recognized this habit. That being said doesn’t mean that the habit went away or that it doesn’t get the best of me still.
Over the last couple of weeks I have experienced events in my life that caused me to retreat to my protected barrier and to comfort myself with junk food (ice cream, etc…).
Now, those closest to me know me well enough to see through the barrier and last night my husband did just that. He asked what was going on and I caved, I told him everything that was causing my stress, my work, my friends, and the whole lot. I had a good cry and we talked about how I could try and cope with things. I also confessed the eating that I had done and do you know what he did? He said, “Well trash is picked up tomorrow morning” and went into the kitchen, threw away all the trigger foods that I had mentioned. When he came back in he said to me, “You are worth so much more than any of that junk food. From now on there will be no junk in this house.” God, I love this man. I am so lucky to have such great family support.
Then, this morning one of my most dear friends asked me what was up. And again I caved and told her everything. Know what she said? “Done now….back on track” and then she said, “It is what it is; pull up those panties, put on those heels and work it!” Thanks princess, I needed to hear that. I am so lucky to have such great friends supporting me.
I know I can do this and I will do this for the rest of my life. I will have days and times where I stumble and fall. But, I will get myself up, brush myself off and keep going. Because I WANT this!
I guess what I am trying to say is that even the success stories (the veterans) make mistakes, have bad days, and go backwards. The important thing is to identify the problem and find a solution. Then get your ass back on track.
Thant is exactly what I am doing.
My nephew Benjamin got married this weekend in California and I was able to fly out there. This was the first time I have flown with Yellow Rose (my band). Jonathon (another nephew) and I flew out Friday morning arriving in California around lunchtime. As we are exiting the plane Jonathon requested In & Out Burgers for lunch (the greasiest burgers in town!). We retrieved our rental car and headed south to my brother’s house (via In & Out). We collected burgers for all the kids. I had no urge for a burger as Yellow Rose was letting me know she did not like flying….
Once we arrived, burgers delivered, my sister-in-law asked if I wanted anything for lunch (seeing that I didn’t have a burger). Yes, I was hungry but I knew that I couldn’t manage much more than mushy foods. I hesitated in answering and she quickly said “I have some greek yogurt or laughing cow cheese….” Ok how did she know?????
She had called my mom (who knows everything about my band) and asked if there was anything she could get for me. So after choking back tears and a big hug I settled for some greek yogurt.
The weekend was a blast! I saw family that I have not seen in 5 years and they were all very complimentary over how I looked. I heard “You look amazing” over & over and I loved every minute of it. I had some treats, like Trader Joes Dark Chocolate Espresso Beans but I also made good food choices (Ahi Tuna for lunch).
I am proud of myself as I managed a weekend away from home (comfort zone) full of family (can be stressful) and had a great time.
Oh and the best part was my hips DID NOT touch the sides of the seat on the planes. How cool is that?!!!!
And it is very easy to make. Here is my favorite recipe
Roasted Red Pepper Hummus
1 Can chickpea/garbonza beans (15oz)
1/3 cup tahini (See note below)
¼ cup lemon juice
2 Tbs olive oil
2 garlic cloves, crushed
½ - ¾ cup roasted red peppers
In a food processor, combine beans, tahini, lemon juice and olive oil. Process until smooth. Add red peppers and garlic until desired consistency.
I calculated the nutritional information based on ¼ cup serving:
Calories 154
Total Fat 11g
Sodium 190mg
Total Carbs 8.4g
Dietary fiber 3.2g
Sugars .9g
Protein 5.1g
Tahini is sesame seed butter. I find it with the peanut butter or in the international isle of the grocery store.
Enjoy!
Get your ass moving AJ! You have been slacking on this. The Fitbit doesn't lie. It shows that your daily steps are way down, no where near the 10,000 step per day goal. And what happened to taking the stairs at work???? Slacking there too!
Vacation is over! First tine tomorrow you will get moving. Tomorrow, hell, what is wrong with right now?
Stop typing and get moving! NOW!!!!
Will do, just as soon as this video is over. OK, as long as you dance during the video!!!
Two months ago my doctor said as far as they were concerned I was at goal, 175 lbs. I was happy with that and started onto the maintenance stage of my journey.
Last month I gained 2 lbs, first time I had a gain but hey holidays. Doctor’s office was still very pleased and said that my weight will vary like that on maintenance.
Then a dear friend here on LBT put out a challenge “100 miles in January”. Walk or run 100 miles during the month of January. I was in! I needed something to get me moving more. I reached the 100 miles on Monday; my total should be around 120 miles for the month. (go me!)
Today I went back to the doctor, weighed 171! (lost 6 pounds in 4 weeks) I haven’t seen that much loss since the beginning months of this journey. So, what did I do different? My eating was the same as it has always been 1200 calories a day, etc…. The only thing different is the increased walking for the challenge.
I am so happy with myself. I couldn’t ask for anything more. Okay, maybe a tummy tuck and….. Well guess I could ask for more.
I love & respect my band. Yellow rose you serve me well, thank you!
Everyone has a different idea as to what the ‘Green Zone’ should be like, how it should feel. How tight do you need to be in order to be in the zone? Some like to be really tight where as other like their band a little looser.
I have experienced my band being ‘nice and tight’ so to speak. I never felt physical hunger, but there was food I couldn’t eat like chicken breasts and vegetables. I would cook a wonderful meal for the family and then find I couldn’t eat it. I also found that it would take me over 30 minutes to eat. I hated meals; I would get frustrated and found myself turning to slider foods like cheese and crackers or peanuts. I struggled to maintain my weight from week to week and I was miserable.
This was not the lifestyle I wanted so I had my doctor take out half a cc of fluid from my band. The result is I can eat any and all foods without problems, I go 3-4 hours without feeling physical hunger and most important is being able to enjoy mealtime with my family. This is my ‘Green Zone’.
This experience makes me understand why so many posts say they are gaining weight and they might be too tight. It is very easy to gain weight when the foods you eat slides right down (they can be healthy foods too – mine was cheese & peanuts).
I cannot manage my band when it is too tight, I would rather manage my lifestyle and use my band to complement that style.
I am a loosey goosey! (Yep I made up a new term)
I went shopping today for sweaters. It appears that I am cold a lot these days & I don’t have many long sleeve tops that fit.
So I picked out a few tops and walked by the jeans…. Out of complete curiosity I picked out a couple of different style in size 10 (currently size 12).
Holy Sh*t they fit!!!!! I was dancing around in that dressing room and laughing. I’m sure the attendee thought I was nuts (ok I know I am but that’s a different story).
That explains why the size 16 pants that I wore today bugged me so much; they were 3 sizes too big.
Wow I don’t even know how old I was the last time I was size 10, 9 maybe 10 years old??
I am so floored, I’m numb.
These are my babies!
Atticus, Black Mouth Cur. He is the biggest baby in town.
Hank, Blue Healer. Gill's dog, follows her around the whole time she is here.
Sophie, Dachshund. Daddy's baby (but he won't admit it) and the BOSS of all the dogs!
Bugsy, Rat Terrier and Dachsund mix. My baby, he is with his best friend Smokey the cat.
When I discovered LBT I was 4 months into my journey, like most I would read a lot of posts and on occasion I would post. I found myself following 2 ladies and the 3 of us struck up a wonderful friendship. We would goof around, take over threads, insult and love each other. One from Florida, one form North Carolina and myself from Texas we became the three musketeers of LBT.
We have never met face to face but to me our friendship is the most precious around. I love both these ladies like sisters. I don’t know what I would do without them.
This evening when I got home from work the mailman knocked on my door with a package for me from Florida?! The package was marked Fragile….I haven’t ordered anything on line lately. Who do I know in Florida??? I was puzzled. So I opened the package to find the most thoughtful birthday gift from one of my LBT friends. It was so thoughtful and personalized that I burst into tears.
I enjoy my wine and my hot tub, but we all know that wine glasses do not mix with hot tubs. So I got a personalized travel wine glass, it’s called ClearWater Gear and her daughter did the vinyl customizing. I will cherish this gift.
Thank you so very much!
I have a 13 year old step daughter, I’ve been her step mom for 4 years now and to say our relationship is strained is putting it mildly. Basically her mother wanted her to hate her step mom and she got her wish.
Tonight I watched her eat a dinner plate worth of food in less than ten minutes. She shoveled the food into her mouth; barely chew as she reloaded her fork. All I could do was watch and cry inside. Her father & I have tried to get her to eat slower, smaller bites, etc… but it goes on deaf ears. The only thing we can do is only have health choices in our house. I am thankful that what she wolfed down tonight was baked salmon, brown rice, boiled carrots and for dessert a frozen Greek yogurt bar.
I know that if she continues these eating habits she will be fat as an adult and will face all the things I faced as an obese adult. That makes me cry.
I know that all I can do is what I already do, offer healthy choices and advise if she wants to listen.
Today was my monthly appointment at True Results. They always have the patients fill out a questionnaire prior to seeing the NP. It asks what your typical meals are, the size (1/2 cup, 1 cup, 1 ½ cups, etc), what exercise you are doing, and so forth. I answered the questions honestly. I am eating 1 to 1 ½ cups per meal and getting hungry between meals.
I am happy to say that I am maintaining my weight of 169 pounds. So I don’t know if it is the head or not.
When I met with the NP we discussed this and she told me a story about how the head messes with us.
She had a transfer patient come in (they always pull all the fluid out of the band to verify the amount on transfer patients). She pulls out the fluid and puts it right back in (doesn’t add or remove any of the fluid). Two days later the patient calls her saying “I don’t know what you did but I have not restriction.” She has the patient come back in (concerned of a leak), pulls out all the fluid out again (the amount was exactly as it was 2 days earlier) and puts it back (again not adding or removing any fluid). Two days later the patient calls her saying “I am so tight I can’t eat anything” Nothing changed as far as the amount of fluid in her band; it was all in the head. lol
I did get a small fill and instructions to get my timer back out and time my bits, put a dime next to my plate for a visual on the size of my bits, and most important, come to the support group on Thursday to help get a hold of this head game I got going on.
Maintains is not a walk in the park!
I was reading the forum today and read a reply to a post about snacking that said “It’s okay to be hungry.”
This got me thinking (I know scary, huh?!)
Do I really know what true physical hunger feels like? Hunger where you don’t know if or when you will eat again….. Pain and discomfort from malnutrition and dehydration.
I have never experienced true physical hunger.
But, I’m the first to say I am sooooo hungry. Why? Was it the way I was raised? Society? Or what?
Before my band food was everything. I would plan every meal to the tee and as soon as the meal was over I was talking/planning the next meal. Breakfast at 8am, lunch at noon, afternoon snacks/cocktails at 5pm and dinner at 7pm. My belly alarm would go off at each time and I would say I’m hungry. I was obsessed with my meals and eating. Food had all the control.
Fast forward 18 months and I have the control back (for the most part). Yes I still eat on the same schedule. This is a personality flaw for me, very organized and schedule oriented. It drives some people crazy. The difference is that I know this is a trigger for my head hunger and I don’t let that “I’m hungry” feeling take over. I know when I’m going to eat, I know how much I’m going to eat and I know what types of foods I’m going to eat.
So, yes it’s okay to be hungry. But, my head hunger will not control me, I will control it!
The band is a tool and will only work if used correctly, we know this and state it daily.
We have another very important tool, our doctor. He (or she) is the one we trusted to cut up our insides. But this tool doesn’t stop there, we pay them for our after care. I’m not talking just for the post op diets. I’m talking months and years of after care, whether it is fills or just checking in or complications we need this tool as much as we need our bands.
So why would we not use this tool? Why are we afraid to call the doctor? Why don’t we want to go back to the doctor? Who loses out when we don’t use this tool? The doctor doesn’t. He’s off helping other patients who are using their tool. We lose! We keep spiraling out of control, gaining weight, feeling like we failed, and hating the band.
I use my tools to the fullest capacity!
I lost 80 pounds in 10 months and have maintained my weight for the last 7 months. And, I still see my doctor once a month. Why? Because I am using my tool. I often don’t get a fill, I weigh in, ask any questions I may have and say hello to everyone. I am there so much that all the staff know me by name. They may get sick of seeing me, but hey I pay for this tool and by golly I’m going to use it.
So, if you are struggling and you haven’t seen your doctor in a while, pick up the phone and make an appointment. Use your tool! If you don’t you are only hurting yourself.
