OK...here goes nothing. I haven't posted in quite a while because I have been dealing with some real shit at home. A month ago I found out that my husband of almost 10 years has been having an affair for the last year and a half. :mad:That's right...while I was losing weight and looking great, that pig went out seeking an affair and here I was scared of how I would act after I started to get attention from others when I started to look nice. I am hurt:crying:, angry:mad2:, sad :cry_smile:, devastated:cursing:, sick and every other emotion (other than happy). I'm now on Xanax for my anxiety and I am completely obsessed with this crap. How can someone go out seeking an affair when they have a wife and two beautiful children? Do people care anymore? Do vows mean anything? What the hell is wrong with people? Of course now all of a sudden he wants the marriage to work. Well damn...you should have thought about that before porking the skank!!!! I want to freaken scream. I want to hurt them both. How the hell do people get on after things like this happen to them? Is it possible? We are in counseling, but should I even bother? Will he do it again? What about my kids? Damn...I need some serious help. This really sucks. I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of the chest pains and the anxiety. I want a fairy tale ended but unfortunately my marriage will NEVER be the same. I can never look at him the same way again. Do I give up and start my life over with my boys? Can someone wake me up from this horribe nightmare????? Why me? In the last year I have gone from a size 22/24 to a size 10/12 and I have lost 106 pounds. I thought that my husband was proud of me and thought that I was looking good...guess not, huh? Joke's on me!!!

WOW! I got so carried away, I started a new page! LOL! Sorry about the long post above!!

hey tina.. it's good to hear you are doing well.. I personally don't think you were "drugged" I know for me since being banded I get totally drunk in like no time! I actually had a incident where I had like 4 shots and 1 drink and actually can't remember much of what happened! I was at home. So maybe you just were really drunk. I would definetly be careful but since you were with your brother I am sure no one was going to take advantage. This is just my 2 cents..lol

omg..good luck with this..if my man did that shit to me i would fucking kill him literally..i am a 2 year old daughter and I am battling with my weight..its hard to not get jealous women look at him at the mall...

Well hello ladies (and gentlemen). The party was a success. We all had a wonderful time and there were $1,000 in sales so I got $100 in free stuff. Afterwards we went to the local watering hole (real small place) and had a couple of drinks. It really was fun.

On Saturday I went to a bar where I know the bartender and had a couple of drinks while waiting for my girlfriend so we could go to A Chorus Line (I love that show). So...we went there and then met up with a guy from my work who wanted to hang out. This guy is really awesome. He drove downtown so he could hang out. Wasn't that sweet? Well, I got home around 2:30 am and had a blast. I have the kids this coming weekend but I'm also throwing a surprise birthday party for my dad. So...yet another busy weekend on the horizon.

I'm doing great...absolutely wonderful...he's having trouble and I don't know what I can do to help him. I don't want to make him mad and make all of this ugly. I want us to get along and be civil for the kids.

Thanks so much for caring about me. I love you guys so much.

I am loving life right now!!!!!:frown:

Good to hear it, Tina!!

As for making things better for him, screw that. You don't have to be a bitch (which it sounds like you're not in any way), but his issues with HIM causing this are not your problem. HE foisted this on YOU, not the other way around.

If he gets angry, remind him WHY this happened. He has no right to get angry, question you, or give you a hard time AT ALL.

Hello Tina, I agree with what Beth said. Just remind him he messed up, not you. Have fun with your dad's party.

Hey Tina,

I was wondering where you were. Glad to hear things are going your way! You are doing so well. I'm proud of you.

Sounds like your group of friends are fun and supportive and that's what you need to surround yourself with.

Don't worry about EX-DH, he made his bed and now he has to lie in it. Its nice that you care and want to get along for the kid's sake, but as for feeling bad for him because he's sorry he got caught - seriously?

Keep up the good work and enjoy yourself. You deserve it.

Keep us posted!!!

Thanks guys. Guess what...3 weeks from today is the HUGE day...I'm getting scared to death. I go next Monday to pay for the surgery and to get all marked up to see what they are going to take off. I'm excited but terrified. I need some good vibes sent my way.

So...my youngest started t-ball last night and my husband was there (he has become a wonderful father). I was on my cell phone almost the entire time and I know that it was just killing him. I think that deep inside his heart he knows it's over but he just doesn't want to admit it and to be honest he's kinda make me feel guilty about it. I didn't cause this...I didn't want my marriage to end...I never wanted to divorce...however, I will not be with someone that I cannot trust. So...I am truly loving my new life.

Keep sending those good vibes to me...I need to stay strong and I need to not worry about this surgery...it's for the best, right? I'm gonna be a hot mama afterwards, right???

Tina,

Best of luck to you on the surgery. You will look amazing and feel even more amazing once you're all healed. I know you'll do well. You're young and healthy and there are so many on here that have had PS with no problems.

Good job on not caving in to the guilt trip your EX-husband (you need to get used to putting that ex in there) is trying to put you on. Sure he's sorry, but he's sorry that he got caught, not sorry he did it. Apparently he wanted his cake and eat it too. Now he has to take care of himself and watch his hot soon to be ex-wife move on with her life. Too bad for him. At least he's trying to be a good dad.

Enjoy yourself, you deserve it! I can't wait to see your after pics!

You already ARE a hot mama, Tina. Just now, you'll finally have the body to make you feel better about yourself.

As for him making you feel guilty, do all you can to not let that happen EVER. What do YOU have to feel guilty about? Being cheated on? Being lied to? Being strung along while he carried on dalliances with other women? For being a good mom to your kids while he was "dating"? For finally standing up for yourself and saying you can't live like this? Hon, you have NOTHING to feel guilty about. Every time you try feeling like that (or HE tries to make you feel like that), just politely remind him that YOU stayed true to your marriage while he did not, and then walk away. Strength will eventually come.

You already ARE a hot mama, Tina. Just now, you'll finally have the body to make you feel better about yourself.

As for him making you feel guilty, do all you can to not let that happen EVER. What do YOU have to feel guilty about? Being cheated on? Being lied to? Being strung along while he carried on dalliances with other women? For being a good mom to your kids while he was "dating"? For finally standing up for yourself and saying you can't live like this? Hon, you have NOTHING to feel guilty about. Every time you try feeling like that (or HE tries to make you feel like that), just politely remind him that YOU stayed true to your marriage while he did not, and then walk away. Strength will eventually come.

What Beth said...in spades!

You already ARE a hot mama, Tina. Just now, you'll finally have the body to make you feel better about yourself.

As for him making you feel guilty, do all you can to not let that happen EVER. What do YOU have to feel guilty about? Being cheated on? Being lied to? Being strung along while he carried on dalliances with other women? For being a good mom to your kids while he was "dating"? For finally standing up for yourself and saying you can't live like this? Hon, you have NOTHING to feel guilty about. Every time you try feeling like that (or HE tries to make you feel like that), just politely remind him that YOU stayed true to your marriage while he did not, and then walk away. Strength will eventually come.

Yes indeed, what she said!

tina

your doing right thing,wish u luck in surgery, ty for the support. u look great girl

larry

Yes, what Beth said! You rock Tina and once you recover from the surgery, you are absolutely going to love your reshaped body.

I've missed a lot but soo happy to read such wonderful updates!!!!!!!!!

1 - My anniversary of finding out in Jan went by just fine, I had a wonderful birthday weekend and the thoughts have subsided. He and I are doing better, still not sure if it will last long term but I trust that God will do what is necessary to have His will pursued.

2 - WOOHOO!!! Tina's in love with Tina!!!! I know this is a difficult time, but it sounds like you made a very thorough and patient decision and your children are not suffering. Keep up the good work, and I definitely keep you in my prayers and send good vibes your way with spirit fingers!!! LOL

3 - Confidence is soooo sexy to men!!! And a pretty face and nice body just are icing on the cake! Don't be nervous about surgery, you have worked your a$$ off, literally lol, and this is just some quick clean up of that hard work. I am so excited for you!!!