As @FluffyChix stated in the original thread:

Quote

Let's share all our sophomore experiences, our angst, our struggles, our suggestions--let's talk about life! Let's become friends! You can be on any kind of food plan, do any kind of exercise or not, be gay or straight, engage in cardio or not--you just have to be in the "tweener" stage post WLS.

Not a Newbie but not yet a Vet - Sophomores have different challenges and are coping with an awkward middle stage, so please only post if you've passed the six month post-surgery mark!

31 minutes ago, sideeye said:

So that one-night stand in Vegas is no longer going to be a one-night stand... After a flurry of holiday messaging, we're meeting up again in March. But I've just realized that the me in November and the me in March is going to probably look pretty damn different. He's not going to see me at all in between, and I'm sort of giggling at the thought that he's going to suddenly get a woman who is anywhere between 10 and 40 lbs lighter than the one he met before.

I'm not actually nervous about this*, and of course it's not going to do one damn thing to impact my WLS decisions, but - shapeshifting hookup!

*okay, I'm a little apprehensive about loose skin and the Vanishing Boobs Conundrum.

Girl...

Start working out NOW!

March Sideeye will thank you

Quote

Girl...

Start working out NOW!

March Sideeye will thank you

Membership at the pool already applied for, new Speedo in my gym kit. Walking 2.5-5 miles a day anyhow. Fired the dog walker and will be adding that in too.

Goddamnit, March!

Ok, so many of us struggle with diet fatigue. We get to a level where we feel great in our clothes, and life is taking off again and we're comfy in our bodies and are having fun loving life. We ARE successful. But we still may be 10-25lbs out from goal! What's a person to do to recapture that lovin' feeling and re-amp the diet and exercise and mindset back to losing?

I saw this article and I think it could definitely be applied to us and our situations!! What do you think?

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/the-2-mental-shifts-highly-successful-people-make

4 hours ago, sideeye said:

one-night stand in Vegas is no longer going to be a one-night stand..he's going to suddenly get a woman who is anywhere between 10 and 40 lbs lighter than the one he met before.

????

@sideeye

oh no, oh no!!! What did i miss earlier?

one night stand in Vegas - you naughty, naughty girl!!?

been emailing/texting - round two in March?

he saw a great you before, now he will see "less" of you in March

we want all the details

have fun

kathy

(hope it's ok that a VET peaks in on you guys)

9 minutes ago, proudgrammy said:

(hope it's ok that a VET peaks in on you guys)

Sure, only requirement is 6 months post-op! Happy to have you!

9 hours ago, FluffyChix said:

What's a person to do to recapture that lovin' feeling and re-amp the diet and exercise and mindset back to losing?

I saw an article in the NYT (so long ago I can’t find it again) about how one problem with incremental change is our inability to project the benefit out compared to the short-term benefit. When you start weight loss and are losing pounds every week, that benefit is right there in your face, but once the losses become fractional, the immediate gratification isn’t as strong. So in my case tonight: do I want to eat this third tiny shard of almond brittle now, or do I want to look 5 years down the line and ask myself if this third piece right now will help get me where I want to be? Specifically, the technique asks you to envision yourself 5 years from now in a pretty detailed way, and use that specific vision as a touchpoint when making all decisions (this is more effective than individually projecting today’s actions into isolated future visions, because when you don’t link it all together into a grander vision you’re able to explain away a LOT.)

That mindset has helped me a lot in making decisions. Like “in five years, I want to be typing on my couch in a home I own in the middle of a weekday because my job has that sort of flexibility”. I had a very specific idea of what I’d be wearing, my mood, like a snapshot of my future life. Then you look at your life right now and ask what small change you could make to progress towards the goal/vision, with the knowledge that inaction will mean DEFINITELY not achieving that vision in 5 years.

As you all know, I eventually want to become Renee Russo out of the Thomas Crown Affair. So that means right now whittling down my closet, starting to invest in GOOD clothing selectively, and paying a lot more attention to skincare, but I’ll eventually ramp things up incrementally and in five years achieve my vision of being globally respected in my field and shagging a millionaire international art thief on a tropical island while wearing a series of devastatingly chic outfits. Have to start somewhere, so I didn’t have the third shard of brittle and had coffee instead.

Edited January 2, 20197 yr by sideeye

7 hours ago, sideeye said:

I saw an article in the NYT (so long ago I can’t find it again) about how one problem with incremental change is our inability to project the benefit out compared to the short-term benefit. When you start weight loss and are losing pounds every week, that benefit is right there in your face, but once the losses become fractional, the immediate gratification isn’t as strong. So in my case tonight: do I want to eat this third tiny shard of almond brittle now, or do I want to look 5 years down the line and ask myself if this third piece right now will help get me where I want to be? Specifically, the technique asks you to envision yourself 5 years from now in a pretty detailed way, and use that specific vision as a touchpoint when making all decisions (this is more effective than individually projecting today’s actions into isolated future visions, because when you don’t link it all together into a grander vision you’re able to explain away a LOT.)

That mindset has helped me a lot in making decisions. Like “in five years, I want to be typing on my couch in a home I own in the middle of a weekday because my job has that sort of flexibility”. I had a very specific idea of what I’d be wearing, my mood, like a snapshot of my future life. Then you look at your life right now and ask what small change you could make to progress towards the goal/vision, with the knowledge that inaction will mean DEFINITELY not achieving that vision in 5 years.

As you all know, I eventually want to become Renee Russo out of the Thomas Crown Affair. So that means right now whittling down my closet, starting to invest in GOOD clothing selectively, and paying a lot more attention to skincare, but I’ll eventually ramp things up incrementally and in five years achieve my vision of being globally respected in my field and shagging a millionaire international art thief on a tropical island while wearing a series of devastatingly chic outfits. Have to start somewhere, so I didn’t have the third shard of brittle and had coffee instead.

Thank you, I really like that explanation of our fatigue and the solution. I'll have to spend some time figuring out my 5-year plan.

New year, new thread, thanks @sideeye!

Woo hoo! Second night stands are always better than the first!

As far as the boobs and skin, I think we are way harder on ourselves than anyone else is. IME, it seems to be all my issue, and not at all my partners. Also, hopefully most men, at least at a certain age, know we don't look like photshopped Instagram models, right?

9 hours ago, sideeye said:

Have to start somewhere, so I didn’t have the third shard of brittle and had coffee instead.

I'm proud of you

1 hour ago, sillykitty said:

New year, new thread, thanks @sideeye!

Woo hoo! Second night stands are always better than the first!

As far as the boobs and skin, I think we are way harder on ourselves than anyone else is. IME, it seems to be all my issue, and not at all my partners. Also, hopefully most men, at least at a certain age, know we don't look like photshopped Instagram models, right?

I hope so...

19 hours ago, FluffyChix said:

Ok, so many of us struggle with diet fatigue. We get to a level where we feel great in our clothes, and life is taking off again and we're comfy in our bodies and are having fun loving life. We ARE successful. But we still may be 10-25lbs out from goal! What's a person to do to recapture that lovin' feeling and re-amp the diet and exercise and mindset back to losing?

I saw this article and I think it could definitely be applied to us and our situations!! What do you think?

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/the-2-mental-shifts-highly-successful-people-make

I like long term big goals, but I'm kind of ungrateful trash in the end when I achieve them ????? so I think I need short term incremental put stop goals too. I think im going to keep trying to for small and large sustainable changes moving forward.

BTW if anyone wants to join

Very insightful @sideeye! I will work on incorporating the 5-year mindset! Congrats on leaving the brittle, Renee!?

20 hours ago, FluffyChix said:

Ok, so many of us struggle with diet fatigue. We get to a level where we feel great in our clothes, and life is taking off again and we're comfy in our bodies and are having fun loving life. We ARE successful. But we still may be 10-25lbs out from goal! What's a person to do to recapture that lovin' feeling and re-amp the diet and exercise and mindset back to losing?

I saw this article and I think it could definitely be applied to us and our situations!! What do you think?

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/the-2-mental-shifts-highly-successful-people-make

I appreciate you sharing this article. It really resonated with me.

1 hour ago, GreenTealael said:

I like long term big goals, but I'm kind of ungrateful trash in the end when I achieve them ????? so I think I need short term incremental put stop goals too. I think im going to keep trying to for small and large sustainable changes moving forward.

I soooo get THIS! Me too, right?!!! For some reason, the "BIG" goal feels unattainable/scary/meh...something. And then I get to feeling so complacent with how good I'm doing "where I'm at" that I just lose sight of the big finish and so never finish. I feel like having mini, attainable goals, helps to at least let me feel some sense of continued accomplishment? But...I haven't been successful fully with this method, so maybe I'm missing that second step of "the big picture" down the road that will require deferred gratification?

11 hours ago, sideeye said:

I saw an article in the NYT (so long ago I can’t find it again) about how one problem with incremental change is our inability to project the benefit out compared to the short-term benefit. When you start weight loss and are losing pounds every week, that benefit is right there in your face, but once the losses become fractional, the immediate gratification isn’t as strong. So in my case tonight: do I want to eat this third tiny shard of almond brittle now, or do I want to look 5 years down the line and ask myself if this third piece right now will help get me where I want to be? Specifically, the technique asks you to envision yourself 5 years from now in a pretty detailed way, and use that specific vision as a touchpoint when making all decisions (this is more effective than individually projecting today’s actions into isolated future visions, because when you don’t link it all together into a grander vision you’re able to explain away a LOT.)

That mindset has helped me a lot in making decisions. Like “in five years, I want to be typing on my couch in a home I own in the middle of a weekday because my job has that sort of flexibility”. I had a very specific idea of what I’d be wearing, my mood, like a snapshot of my future life. Then you look at your life right now and ask what small change you could make to progress towards the goal/vision, with the knowledge that inaction will mean DEFINITELY not achieving that vision in 5 years.

As you all know, I eventually want to become Renee Russo out of the Thomas Crown Affair. So that means right now whittling down my closet, starting to invest in GOOD clothing selectively, and paying a lot more attention to skincare, but I’ll eventually ramp things up incrementally and in five years achieve my vision of being globally respected in my field and shagging a millionaire international art thief on a tropical island while wearing a series of devastatingly chic outfits. Have to start somewhere, so I didn’t have the third shard of brittle and had coffee instead.

Yes! This is kinda my takeaway from that article! The bigger/grander vision! I really WANT that. You know? (And I now ALSO want to be Renee Russo in TCA with a hot bod/face/hair and a great wardrobe and for Mr. F. to be rollin' in dough with an internationally famous art collection!

Bravo on deferring eating that 3rd shard of toffee!!! Woooootttt!!!