Once again sorry for this post but i love the support here you guys are awesome.

My parents have been on vacation for the past week and a half so some evenings i was kind of lonely which left me thinking about things...mainly things with the ex husband

Looking back on the last 2 years I feel like an idiot. Why did I not leave the day I said I love you and he said he couldn't say it back. Why didn't I question things more when he got very possessive of his phone and wouldn't let me touch it. Why didn't I speak up when he went out with his female friends and didn't want me to come.

I still want to think he wad not being unfaithful, at least physically, but all the classic signs were there and I feel like an idiot for not leaving two years ago

Don't beat yourself up over it! Most of us have looked back on relationships thinking the same things you are thinking. I know it's easier to say this, than actually do it, but you need to start moving on and let go of this. It's not doing you any good. My heart goes out to you, I've been in your situation before.

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There is no disgrace in getting out of a mess. One-way relationships are a waste of time. I am glad you liberating yourself to go get some peace of mind.

There may be problems that arise with leaving, but sometimes these situations solve more problems than they cause.

The best thing that ever happened to me was not marrying my first fiance. Her maturity level kept dropping and dropping and dropping. Finally I caught her cheating on me. I kicked her ass out and never looked back. I have been with my wife now since 2008 and I couldn't be happier! Get over this dirt bag and go find somebody that treats you like you deserve to be treated.

You loved him and wanted it to work. keep moving forward and let go of the past. Make yourself a priority.

I know the feeling, but here is what I think about this topic. I think you are a better person because you REALLY tried, you were "all in". you picked wrong, but your attitude is right.

I had this conversation with my adult son who ended a 5 year relationship about a year or so after he should of. He told me that I had done the same thing, but we were RIGHT for sticking it out as long as we did.... I think you have nothing to be ashamed of/sorry for.

We are human. We all have made mistakes. You were trying to make a marriage work. Forgive yourself and move on. Life goes on and it'll get better. Trust me, I've been where you are. Hugs.

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Thank you guys