Hi,

I am 3 weeks out of surgery. And I'm in pureed stage of my diet. I still want to go out and hangout with family and friends for meals. Some people think it's a waste if I go order a cup of soup n only drink the broth part of it. I'm not tempted when I see others eating nor do I regret my decision.

I like the socializing part of eating out with folks. I understand it's not cost effective. But this is the new me. I will eventually be able to eat until then I don't want to miss out on social gatherings with family and friends.

I can't shut myself in because I made this conscious decision to get sleeved to get to a healthier weight. I have yet to eat or drink anything that is not on my bariatric diet menu. I have always been a social person and I don't want that to change as I love my family and friends.

Yes I can relate. I had a dinner with a major presidential candidate three weeks following surgery. Oh this sucks. But I worked it out with the staff, "I only want soup" and they made it happen without fanfare. Life continued. It happens during the transition. it's OK.

Good on you I say!!

If you want to order soup and just drink the broth then you go for it...

A lot in your position (me included) would opt to stay at home for a little while but if you're ready to get out there and be social then knock yourself out...

More power to you!!

I can relate. Being able to spend time with friends and/or family is so much more satisfying than eating a large meal. Order the soup and enjoy every sip.

I can relate. Being able to spend time with friends and/or family is so much more satisfying than eating a large meal. Order the soup and enjoy every sip.

Ditto! Every minute is precious. Tonight, I took mom out to dinner. Even though I didn't eat since I had a protein shake for dinner earlier. She and I had a great time laughing and bonding. Food didn't even cross my mind.

@ dusky goddess: My sleeve is scheduled 11/18th, and my coworkers are already planning on where to go for Christmas dinner. My family are the only ppl that know about my surgery. I haven't said anything to anyone else. I guess I will need to see how I feel when the time comes. I want to go and mingle with friends. I figured if I will know the restaurant before hand I can look at the menu and order something mushy, or soup. I don't want to say to anyone that I am on a diet or that I had sleeve surgery. I will see how it goes, but I feel you. You don't need to un socialize, you can still socialize with your friends just plan ahead to assure that you are within your diet guidelines.

@ dusky goddess: My sleeve is scheduled 11/18th, and my coworkers are already planning on where to go for Christmas Dinner. My family are the only ppl that know about my surgery. I haven't said anything to anyone else. I guess I will need to see how I feel when the time comes. I want to go and mingle with friends. I figured if I will know the restaurant before hand I can look at the menu and order something mushy, or soup. I don't want to say to anyone that I am on a diet or that I had sleeve surgery. I will see how it goes, but I feel you. You don't need to un socialize, you can still socialize with your friends just plan ahead to assure that you are within your diet guidelines.

I had told my coworkers I was having surgery but not the specifics. My family and close friends know what kind of surgery I had and are very supportive. I'm looking forward to the holiday season because by then I will be rocking a new wardrobe and that keeps me motivated. My sister is hosting thanksgiving and was very sweet to inquire about what kind of foods I will be able to consume by then so she can accommodate my special dietary need. Truly blessed to have people who care and love me so dearly.

Edited November 4, 201510 yr by dusky goddess

I endorse your philosophy -- live, love, eat (or sip, as the case may be).

Since having WLS I have learned that it is not a sin to not clean my plate, even if I learned that it was and behaved all my life as though it were.

It's simply not.

It's very empowering to just be able to order a cup of soup, or even just a cup of coffee. I often times order "just" a drink and sip it while everyone else orders a meal. I don't tell anyone why, if anyone asks, I simply say I'm not hungry in a manner that invites no more questions and I change the subject.

As far as it being a "waste"? I've had to change my mindset on that completely. If I have a bag of wheat thins and I eat them, they are gone. If I have a bag of wheat thins, I don't eat them and have to throw them away because they go stale, they are gone. Either way, they are gone. The only real difference is I didn't consume the carbs and calories unnecessarily. I have to remind myself that every stinking time I clean out my kids' lunchboxes. WHY WHY WHY am I fussing at them for NOT eating foods they obviously didn't want that day? The cleaning the plate mentality is what got ME here and I am not putting them there.

Sorry for the ramble...that's just been on my mind lately.

Socialize as you wish. Order your soup. Don't make a big deal re broth. I frequently get questions from the wait staff who are concerned that I didn't like it or that something was wrong with the food since quite a bit is left over. I just say "it was great, I just had a big lunch" or a big Breakfast, etc. Most of my skinny friends leave half the food on their plates anyway so its not really that noticable most of the time anyway.

Sounds like the perfect attitude. Go and enjoy time with family & friends. That's the important thing.

'

If someone thinks your leftovers are a waste, just offer it to them. I think they'll probably shut up about it. Here's how that goes down in my head:

Them: It's such a waste to order Soup and not eat the good stuff.

Me: Here, do you want it?

Them: No thanks.

Me: Oh, but you said it was a waste. Obviously that's important to you. Here, you eat it.

Them: No.

Me: (pushing it towards them) Are you sure? Eat it!

Them: No!

Me: Eat it!

Them: How 'bout them dodgers?

Me: That's what I thought.

YES! I'm in the same position now. I'm in week 4 and like You I love to eat with family &friends. I miss that especially at dinner time. Stay encouraged. Keep looking good!

My surgery is Monday. I've asked my husband to eat whatever meals he normally would around me. Nobody else is going to make changes to how/when/what they eat so I wanted to be used to it. I, too, will socialize after surgery for the holidays. If anyone questions it, I'll either be not hungry or say my stomach is bothering me. Two valid answers that nobody would question.