Went to the plastic surgeon yesterday and cried all the way through the appointment. i felt violated and it was not his fault. Pictures were taken of the grossness of my entire body and money kept coming up and what and what not he was not able to do for me. Insurance would only pay for a small portion of what I need done according to him. The rest is out of pocket. Which for me is out of the question. Everything in my life has gone out of control. The house has flooded. The bathroom toilet is broke and the washing machine died. I can handle all of these things but what I went through yesterday made me sick, really sick. Too know that I went through all of these troubles and there is no one who is willing to help me without big bucks in my pocket is horrible and somewhat demeaning. I feel like I have been sucker punched in the gut it hurts so much. I feel like I have no options but to maybe sell my home and move into a trailer but then I have to put thousands into my house to sell it because of the damage caused by the flood ( tiles broke and backed up right into the house). Extensive surgeries were mentioned along with the amount of work needed just to put contours into my body. I think he was saying I was gross and needed a lot of surgeries to fix me to look passable.

I can't stop crying I need work done on my bed sore scar as well and the other surgeon can only do some as he thinks I still have sponge stuck in there from some student changing the gauze before I left the hospital over a year ago.

I feel horrible and like the whole thing is way too much for me to handle. I should crawl away and look for a hole to climb into I am so gross....... I don't feel sorry for myself I just feel like I can't take any more of all that I am going through.

Just putting it out there and if you think that I take delight in this I don't I just don't have anyone to share this with and maybe someone in the WLS world understands my sorrow!

Edited September 26, 201411 yr by RJ'S/beginning

I read somewhere that it's important to keep a record of times that you have to visit your doctor for problems caused from the excess skin after you've lost a lot of weight. This proves to the insurance company that it's medically necessary and should be covered. I'm scheduled for surgery in November and I hope to lose a lot of weight so I'm sure that I'll have tons of extra skin. I'm going to make sure to keep good records in case I should need plastic surgery.

Was this guy recommended by your bariatric surgeon?? Our office has a plastic surgeon on staff! I would find one that is connected to a bariatric center.

Yes he is part of the team that has been put together.

RJ, that just sucks.

I hope when you've gotten your breath back that you can find another path to your goal.

But in the meantime, it's got to be tough.

RJ, that just sucks.

I hope when you've gotten your breath back that you can find another path to your goal.

But in the meantime, it's got to be tough.

I can barely stand it all! Thank you!

@GummyTummy your response hit home with me, very well written. I think that when people try to read something they perceive it in different ways because of what personal demons they are fighting which could hinder the true meaning.

We all need to vent sometimes and sometimes when people don't respond the way we want them to..we sometimes can take it as an attack..which essentially it isn't. 2-3 weeks or even a year from now...when things are going good...re-read the post...and can guarantee we will see it differently than now.

RK, you definitely have had an awful road with all the complications you have experienced. Life threatening, horrendous things that most of us has not had to deal with. Emotionally you have to be exhausted and I can understand how you had just turned to corner, so to speak, with all of it.

Don't give up. I have very good pals on BP who have said Exactly the same thing about going to Plastics the first time. And some never went back. Others found new doctors and were able to go forward. I believe you will find someone with compassion and understanding for what YOU want to deal with. Maybe somebody recommended by your WLS who has experience with WLS patients more.

You WILL be okay and have a good life I believe. Thinking and praying for you.

Oh RJ, I am so sorry that a** was so cruel to you. Check out this website:

http://www.bariatricgirl.com/2014/05/what-wlsfa-org-is-all-about-saving-lives-one-grant-at-a-time/

and see if these folks can help you with a grant for the surgery you need. They help with plastics as well as bariatric surgery. It would be worth having to tell your story one more time. I know that eventually a person gets tired of being strong. I wish you were my neighbor so that I could come over and give you a big hug.

Hi RJ, What about telling your story on something like gofundme.com? People are able to donate money to you to help with what you need. I know people that were able to raise money to cover things that are not nearly as important as your needs. Good luck!

Thank you guys for your encouragement. It was not about the money. It was about how he looked at me and how he kept putting the dollar first. Not to mention that I knew I looked bad but not that bad. I felt so horrible after that experience. But am not looking for charity. I just wondered if anyone ever had the same experience. My heart beats fast when I think about how humiliated I was and still feel.....It was one of the worst things I have ever endured.....I will never forget it! I really won't.

It is just another thing in a long line of disasters for me through this!

Yes he is part of the team that has been put together.

Then he MUST have seem patients who had lost a lot of weight before. Or are you the first one? Confusing, if he's part of the team. Then he should not be shocked or repulsed by lots of excess skin.

Then he MUST have seem patients who had lost a lot of weight before. Or are you the first one? Confusing, if he's part of the team. Then he should not be shocked or repulsed by lots of excess skin.

When I talked to the nurse today and told her what happened she said that he really was not part of the team he was just another plastics that had been used. She also said that others had come back to the office after seeing him in tears because of how they were treated by him.

I wanted to cancel my appointment with him but my hubby said " No lets get his opinion and then try another" I had his alright.......

The nurse was going to talk to my surgeon I have no idea what will happen next...Except I will not be using him that is for sure. I served my time of people looking at me like I did not deserve to walk on the same ground as them...... It just really hurts and the sting has not left me yet. It will though I always push through!

Edited September 27, 201411 yr by RJ'S/beginning

Remember "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

-Eleanor Roosevelt

Don't give that asswipe the power to upset you. You find someone who you can feel comfortable with. Find someone who will advocate for you.

And alternatively many people on here have had great success in Mexico. Don't give up!

RJ, I'm sending you a hug long distance. Don't let that a-hole get you down. Of course it affected you. You were literally stripped of all of your defenses and being analyzed by a boor.

I know you won't give up and I know you'll prevail. What I would do, but it's just me, is call ahead before the next appointment even though it will be a different surgeon. I would tell the people on the other end about this event and that you want them to know how horrible that treatment was for you and ask what kind of manner the new doctor has. It doesn't hurt to put people on notice. I would even ask them to relay the information to the surgeon before you arrive.

I know this sounds odd, but why? If we take care of our emotional selves as well as our physical selves, that is a good thing. Would you let your mother or your daughter receive bad treatment if you could prevent it? Nope. So throw that out there and make the new surgeon think twice before being callous or dismissive or worse, cruel, like that first ass.

I'm sorry about your plumbing problems. What a s****y week.

RJ-

I know that I don't really know you, but I have a great deal of respect for the advice and support that you so freely give to those of us who are also on this site. I just wanted to say that I am so sorry that this unprofessional PS made you feel humiliated and upset. He is obviously someone who you would not entrust with your medical care, and he has no business reacting in anything but a informative, compassionate way.

You are a brave soul who has had much to deal with. I'm so sorry that this happened to you.

Thank you everyone for your kind support. Just anyone saying he's a 'rat bastard' of sorts made it better for me.