Went to the plastic surgeon yesterday and cried all the way through the appointment. i felt violated and it was not his fault. Pictures were taken of the grossness of my entire body and money kept coming up and what and what not he was not able to do for me. Insurance would only pay for a small portion of what I need done according to him. The rest is out of pocket. Which for me is out of the question. Everything in my life has gone out of control. The house has flooded. The bathroom toilet is broke and the washing machine died. I can handle all of these things but what I went through yesterday made me sick, really sick. Too know that I went through all of these troubles and there is no one who is willing to help me without big bucks in my pocket is horrible and somewhat demeaning. I feel like I have been sucker punched in the gut it hurts so much. I feel like I have no options but to maybe sell my home and move into a trailer but then I have to put thousands into my house to sell it because of the damage caused by the flood ( tiles broke and backed up right into the house). Extensive surgeries were mentioned along with the amount of work needed just to put contours into my body. I think he was saying I was gross and needed a lot of surgeries to fix me to look passable.

I can't stop crying I need work done on my bed sore scar as well and the other surgeon can only do some as he thinks I still have sponge stuck in there from some student changing the gauze before I left the hospital over a year ago.

I feel horrible and like the whole thing is way too much for me to handle. I should crawl away and look for a hole to climb into I am so gross....... I don't feel sorry for myself I just feel like I can't take any more of all that I am going through.

Just putting it out there and if you think that I take delight in this I don't I just don't have anyone to share this with and maybe someone in the WLS world understands my sorrow!

Edited September 26, 201411 yr by RJ'S/beginning

RJ, thanks for keeping it real. You help me more than you will ever know.

I feel your pain. Overcoming the feeling of being gross or abnormal is common to many of us.

I am so sorry to hear you are going through this and I have always appreciated your presence on the board.

Though I don't know you personally, I have taken a few moments today to truly lift you up in prayer...that you would be surrounded by the right care givers, that your journey will be positive and that you would have the healing inside and out that we all need.

Omg I just had a memory come back reading this thread. I was about seven or eight years old and I was super stressed out with stomach aches and threw up in the mornings. The doctor looked at my chubby self and said, "you don't look like a person who can't keep anything down." I was old enough to know I had been fat shamed and I didn't want to go to the doctor after that. Saddest thing is that I was probably reacting to emotional problems and bullying, but the result was I wasn't permitted to eat peanuts or popcorn for many years. I still had stomach aches and nausea though. It felt like I had been punished for going to the doctor.

I had a similar experience in high school. Scheduling classes I noticed I would not have a lunch period. The guidance counselor said " well you look like you can make it without a lunch" I was 16 years old and what would be about a 26 BMI and she fat shamed me. I already thought I was huge compared to my petite friends now she backed up my beliefs. There is a warm place in hell reserved for people who are supposed to help us who instead knock us down. And they do it because they need to bring others down to keep themselves feeling superior most of the time. 32 years ago and I still remember that. b***h.

Edited September 30, 201411 yr by playlikeworldchamps

You never forget these episodes @@playlikeworldchamps It is hard to get past them and move on to a new life. their faces are always there saying the hurtful words.

But you are doing it. Your almost to your goal. Kicking Ass is a good feeling and it helps when you can tell them in your head to stick it where the sun don't shine! Good for you kid!

Here lies the problem. Unfortunately, you are taking the brunt of a broken system. The insurance companies know that after weight loss there will be a need for plastics. I mean who wants to lose the weight to get in better health, but then have to look at the skin everyday for rest of our lives? They knew it would happen, yet they are resistant in covering the procedure. So maybe it's not a full body lift, but just cover removing the skin for ALL WLS patients. Possibly, write into the coverage skin removal from the abdomen, thighs, and arms and nothing else - not a lift, just removal.

It's like it's some kind of Jedi Mind Trick or something

I had my nose done a few years ago. Almost all the plastic surgeons I met were wonderful. I talked to them about what I wanted and asked to see pictures of past work.

Amazing how many of them have spent time giving of their skills and time in areas of the world to repair genetic and birth defects.

The one I ultimately chose travels 4 times a year to various locales doing hair lip fixes to children.

The stark contrast between dr m and this son of a female dog is amazing and incomprehensible to me.

Don't get me wrong all the plastics guys I met in NYC were ultra diva and think they're God but they also have a give back/humble side.

At no time was I treated like this. And I wasn't a Middle Aged suburban cutey mommy. I was obese and wanting a bump removed. And maybe a boob lift. He told me to lose 50 pounds and come back to talk to him. Ok. Done.

You need to also report to whatever medical board you have up there that deals with the appropriate and ethical treatment of patients.

Hugs from New Jersey babe!

You never forget these episodes @@playlikeworldchamps It is hard to get past them and move on to a new life. their faces are always there saying the hurtful words.

But you are doing it. Your almost to your goal. Kicking Ass is a good feeling and it helps when you can tell them in your head to stick it where the sun don't shine! Good for you kid!

I hope you can take a step back and look at how you counsel others, be a little kinder to yourself. So the plastic surgeon was a pompous ass, his problem, he can't insult you any longer unless you let him. Even though I'm a man, I had an incident years ago with a dentist, what has bothered me to this day is that I let him get away with it instead of either telling him off or punching him in the nose. I don't know you but you seem to have lived through some personal challenges, you have tackled your health and your weight (you lost over 200 lbs.!), and you're still here standing. So I think you can handle some snot nosed punk with a MD after his name. Time to put the tissues away and tackle this like you have every other challenge in your life, I'm confident we'll be reading about your sucessful solution soon.