Who here is post op and had issues with men, (or women:) ) not wanting them because of there weight. Do you you do online dating now/before surgery? Are you having more luck now? What are you telling dates? Thanks:)

Your telling me... Not the first time. Had it happen probably 5-10 times on the first date.

Your telling me... Not the first time. Had it happen probably 5-10 times on the first date.

Needy.

I can't help but wonder if these dudes know what the word love means?

Most recent guy we talked on the phone for like 3 hours. He then texts me tells me he loves me...

Some of the guys on these sites will deliberately "mess" with you -- sounds Weird but I promise you this is true. It can be a Good thing, in some cases. Others it just comes across as creepy and rightfully so.

Interesting topic, as a guy I notice a lot of hold me, but dont touch me going on. I thank my lucky stars that I am not in the market for a mate.

Interesting topic, as a guy I notice a lot of hold me, but dont touch me going on. I thank my lucky stars that I am not in the market for a mate.

I don't understand this statement.

Many want a significant other, but have many reasons to not let one into their life. Hold me, dont touch me. I deal with people at work that also fall into this category, but on different issues. They will claim to really want something , but refuse to pay the price ( DO WHATS REQUIRED ON THEIR END) to have it.

I've been wondering about some of these questions as well. Newly divorced and looking to step out there into the dating world. I've tried Christian Mingle too but it seems hard to get anyone to respond to smiles or winks or whatever. It just seems to be so "looks" oriented -- you have those couple of pictures that people look at before they ever get to the profile. I sit there trying to figure out if it's the weight or my short hair or 20 other factors that keep people from responding. And then I try to take a step back and say to myself "Self, you are a caring, loving, deserving person and you deserve someone who looks beyond the exterior and gets to know the real you." It takes a lot of positive self-talk and reframing... maybe I'll get it down someday...

I too am getting divorced if we ever find him... It's almost a year so I'm hoping after a year of absense it's over.. But anyway. I was on a site called " date hookup"! You put your radius in and what you are looking for. And it's free. I got many men to talk to.. Some were good and some were like.. Oh Dear, so glad you don't know where I love..lol I met some great guys. I was looking for someone that would help me on my weight loss journey.. I found a great guy that teaches yoga and tai chi and is So health conscious and eats Raw, organic as often as we can. It's like my prayers were really answered.

Dating before or after surgery is your choice ladies... But we deserve a man that treats us for who we are, big or small.. After all, we still have the same insides full of love to share. Good luck.. And be careful with meeting them in PUBLIC only!

I found my guy thru a car club... we have the same kind of car and we met at a show... we were friendly, at first... things eventually changed...and I was over 300 pounds, so I never thought we'd be anything but friends (like everyone..major self esteem issues)... he is a lovely, lovely man and takes great care of me... I never thought I'd find anyone like that... so be patient and it will happen, I BELIEVE!!!! "Right in the middle of an ordinary life, Life hands you a Fairytale"

I love your quote..what kind of car do you both have! I have a 67 red mustang!

Many want a significant other, but have many reasons to not let one into their life. Hold me, dont touch me. I deal with people at work that also fall into this category, but on different issues. They will claim to really want something , but refuse to pay the price ( DO WHATS REQUIRED ON THEIR END) to have it.

Ok this I agree with only I call them jaded. I was in that rut myself to some extent really wanting someone but then afraid of w ha t he might expect of me. It was a break through when I said to myself that I want someone and as long as I am honest about my "headspace" he can choose me or not... and I am good with that. It was about 2 weeks from my little epiphany that I met the.man I just started seeing.

Okay yall I am in the middle of a "date" that is leaving me feeling like im being punked.

Second date after a couple months of scheduling conflicts.

Drove an hour as did he and upon arrival he said theres a work emergency so do I mind riding with him to take care of it. So I go. He drops me off at a fast food joint and says hes going across the street to take care of whatever this is. Im here 20 minutes and think I am about to call for a cab back to my car.

Im just dumbstruck. Possibly worst date ever. Lol at least he bought me an iced tea? Maybe thisll be easier post op.

Okay yall I am in the middle of a "date" that is leaving me feeling like im being punked. Second date after a couple months of scheduling conflicts. Drove an hour as did he and upon arrival he said theres a work emergency so do I mind riding with him to take care of it. So I go. He drops me off at a fast food joint and says hes going across the street to take care of whatever this is. Im here 20 minutes and think I am about to call for a cab back to my car. Im just dumbstruck. Possibly worst date ever. Lol at least he bought me an iced tea? Maybe thisll be easier post op.

Oh my goodness! Definitely not third date material. I agree with calling a cab. Think of it as one less person you have to waste time dating before you find the one.

Okay yall I am in the middle of a "date" that is leaving me feeling like im being punked. Second date after a couple months of scheduling conflicts. Drove an hour as did he and upon arrival he said theres a work emergency so do I mind riding with him to take care of it. So I go. He drops me off at a fast food joint and says hes going across the street to take care of whatever this is. Im here 20 minutes and think I am about to call for a cab back to my car. Im just dumbstruck. Possibly worst date ever. Lol at least he bought me an iced tea? Maybe thisll be easier post op.

I hope you are safe.. So what did you do?

Wow

I like to hope this is legit. Let us know.

Well i was about to call a cab when he returned .. im home safe now. Very odd situation but great conversation.

Edited June 3, 201412 yr by PRINCESSM