my boyfriend doesn't approve of the surgery

[kgunchic 16]

Hi. Chad! Aren't these posters amazing? I love them all and this site has helped me when I couldn't count on anyone. I'm going to echo Madame Reverie and be blunt . The REAL reason he 'a not supportive is the same as my husbands reason: the men are AFRAID that once the weight is off, you'll be so hot that you' have a the men out there ogling you and that you may end up leaving him . Sorry to be blunt but I am quoting almost verbatim what was said to me. And know what? Good - let them think that. when you're overweight , it's easy for others to dehumanize you - make you think you have no feelings so they can be the controller F*** that ! You take care of yourself- YOU matter now and If he loves you now , he 'll love you then. OK , I'm done. All the best you!

[sa1976 221]

Chad. Everyone has given you some great advice. All I want to say to you is you must love yourself first. Having this surgery is not easy at all. So do not stress yourself about being lazy. If you and your boyfriend are meant to be then he will come around. He sounds like he has some insecurities that he needs to deal with. Good luck to you.

[fat_free 463]

Chad, I asked my husband to read some of these forums on Bariatric Pal - the good, bad and the ugly. Plus I showed him that I had done my research and had the medical test ,nutritionist, GP, surgeon and psychiatrist review. I told him that I wanted him to read up on what I had researched because I planned on going to through with the surgery regardless because it has been my life that was at risk and I was no longer willing to stand by and let that happen any longer. I wanted him to be part of this monumental decision that I had made but that regardless I was booked for surgery and wasn't planning on cancelling. To my surprise, he actually did read through the forums and came away with more knowledge and a supportive view point. That was at the beginning of May. I had surgery on May 14th and we both couldn't be happier!