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Am I Crazy?!

My heaviest was 234 pounds...

I am 152.6 pounds today;

That is an 81.4 pound weight loss- WOW!

But yet I feel as if I look the same as when I weighed 234!

Anyone else feel like that?

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I've been overweight/obese my entire life. I was a big baby, went right from children's clothes to a misses size 14. Then up from there. I have only been normal sized a few times in my life and I knew it was only temporary because I knew I would fail and the weight would come right back. Is that what you are feeling?

While I know the sleeve is permanent, every time I eat just a little too much and feel too full, I am convinced that I am on that diet yo yo track again. I know I am not, but it's a hard fear to break.

Then I remember that those are old tapes playing my head. I don't have to think that way anymore. It's up to me to turn off those tapes and find a new way of thinking.

Do you sometimes feel like you are "passing for normal" and somehow fate is going to pull the rug out from under you and you will wake up tomorrow at the weight you used to be? I do. When I start to think like that obese person again, I look at the pictures of me on my phone to remind myself how far I have come.

Finally I am interviewing for a new job right now. I can't tell you how great it is to be normal when I first meet potential employers. Don't get me wrong, I'm not small. I'm 5'11" and built like a linebacker. But I hope I am remembered as the tall, statuesque woman, rather than the fat girl.

Good luck on your journey. It's just amazing, isn't it?

The sleeve helps our stomachs and our bodies. It does not help our heads. I've lost over 100 pounds so far and it's rare that I see myself or feel myself as different. Something that I think Most of us work on.

I have been sipping on water non stop. I am really trying to keep myself hydrated. I was told that the first week or so post op it is most important to try and get down protein and water and avoid eating if you feel you can't do it. Does that sound right to you guys? I was sleeved on 11/20/13 and am still dealing with the gas pains... any early post op advice would be greatly appreciated!!

I have been sipping on Water non stop. I am really trying to keep myself hydrated. I was told that the first week or so post op it is most important to try and get down Protein and water and avoid eating if you feel you can't do it. Does that sound right to you guys? I was sleeved on 11/20/13 and am still dealing with the gas pains... any early post op advice would be greatly appreciated!!

Adam it sounds about right! Relax and heal. Hydration first and foremost, then protein up over next few weeks.

And through it all use this time to get control over your " fat brain". We all have one, me for sure. Your fat brain wants to not follow your program, "have just a little of this or that..."

I have been sipping on water non stop. I am really trying to keep myself hydrated. I was told that the first week or so post op it is most important to try and get down protein and water and avoid eating if you feel you can't do it. Does that sound right to you guys? I was sleeved on 11/20/13 and am still dealing with the gas pains... any early post op advice would be greatly appreciated!!

Make sure you walk, walk and walk. It will get rid of those gas pains.

  • Author

I've been overweight/obese my entire life. I was a big baby, went right from children's clothes to a misses size 14. Then up from there. I have only been normal sized a few times in my life and I knew it was only temporary because I knew I would fail and the weight would come right back. Is that what you are feeling? While I know the sleeve is permanent, every time I eat just a little too much and feel too full, I am convinced that I am on that diet yo yo track again. I know I am not, but it's a hard fear to break. Then I remember that those are old tapes playing my head. I don't have to think that way anymore. It's up to me to turn off those tapes and find a new way of thinking. Do you sometimes feel like you are "passing for normal" and somehow fate is going to pull the rug out from under you and you will wake up tomorrow at the weight you used to be? I do. When I start to think like that obese person again, I look at the pictures of me on my phone to remind myself how far I have come. Finally I am interviewing for a new job right now. I can't tell you how great it is to be normal when I first meet potential employers. Don't get me wrong, I'm not small. I'm 5'11" and built like a linebacker. But I hope I am remembered as the tall, statuesque woman, rather than the fat girl. Good luck on your journey. It's just amazing, isn't it?

Yes; I feel like this is temporary and I'll be back to being fat soon-

It's a daily battle trying to tell myself that I am not going back!

This mental warfare is hard; we're programmed with "fat brains" as other people have called it and we have to work through it to keep ourselves on track and not go back-

I was talking to my cousin the other day and she said I need to stop loosing weight because I'm starting to get too skinny; which by the way I've NEVER been told before! But I told her I didn't feel it; I felt the same as when I weighed 234-

Doesn't an anorexic person say the same thing? They're fat?!

I am not anorexic; but I'm using it as an analogy as to the mental games we go through with this weight loss-

That's an interesting analogy. It really is a mind game. Some of us had the "I'm not THAT fat" mentality beforehand. Some of us will never see ourselves as skinny no matter what the scale says. We have to concentrate just as much on what we say to ourselves, as what we put in our bodies and how we exercise.

Those of us that have been morbidly obese and have lost a great deal of weight have a distorted body image. What we see in the mirror is inaccurate. I think we get a better idea of what we really look like when we see ourselves in pictures. Years ago when I had lost 150 pounds (different journey) I remember walking down the street and seeing my reflection in a store window. I didn't even recognize myself. Also once in a dressing room I held up a pair of jeans and thought, "these will never go over my hips". Not only did they fit.... they were too big. It's interesting getting to know ourselves again. And no.... you're not crazy.

  • Author

Those of us that have been morbidly obese and have lost a great deal of weight have a distorted body image. What we see in the mirror is inaccurate. I think we get a better idea of what we really look like when we see ourselves in pictures. Years ago when I had lost 150 pounds (different journey) I remember walking down the street and seeing my reflection in a store window. I didn't even recognize myself. Also once in a dressing room I held up a pair of jeans and thought, "these will never go over my hips". Not only did they fit.... they were too big. It's interesting getting to know ourselves again. And no.... you're not crazy.

Absolutely true; when I go shopping I find myself gravitating to the bigger sizes;

Look at a shirt- xl or so and say "yeah this will fit" and when I try it on it's too big; when I see the smaller sizes I think "it's a medium; no way" and it fits great-

I hardly have any full body pictures from my bigger days and even now I don't really have any-

In a way I wish I did so I had something to compare; refused to take pictures-

So sad; but moving forward...

This is funny! Wonder if others feel the same ! My kids call me skinny and it makes me mad! I look in the mirror and I see the same person!I know I have lost weight because close fit different

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