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Spouse worried about surgery - afraid I won't be the same



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Hi... I was sleeved 4/30. Which makes me just over 3 weeks out. My fiance was extremely worried about me having surgery but understood how important it was to me. He has always said your beautiful and I love you how you are you dont need to change for me. I explained to him that first I was doing it for me. That my goal is not a set number but a healthy weight and bmi. I am soon going to be diabetic if I didnt get the weight off and every time i tried in the past I would loose and once I got too be about 218lbs my body would stop... tried for 4 months with following weight watchers going to curves and the gym for a hour a day and couldnt get under 218. I decided after regaining most of that back i was going to have weight loss surgery. Took me about 5 years but I did it. The first two weeks for me were really tough. But they are getting much better daily. The first week after he told me no more elective surgery for you..lol Despite of that he is so supportive and helps me immensely. As do my 3 daughters they are 17, 15, & 13. I know I made the right choice and being on puree or soft foods has made a huge improvement on how I feel. I did go out Saturday night with my family for dinner and I did get broiled haddock and had lemon on it. It was great! I cook them dinner about 5-6 nights a week as I love to cook. Right now I cant really eat what I make them because I'm not allowed meats for another week. So I make me something easy thats hi Protein. Unless I make haddock cause fish is ok to have. Maybe just try to explain to him that you love him and that this is just really something you feel strongly you need to do for you and having his support would mean a lot. Good luck!!!

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    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        I had about 6 months between deciding to do surgery and getting scheduled. I came across the book The Pound of Cure by Dr. Matthew Weiner, a bariatric surgeon in Arizona, and started to implement some of the changes he recommended (and lost 13 lbs in the process without ever feeling deprived). The book is very simple, and the focus is on whole, plant based foods, but within reason. It's not an all or nothing approach, or going vegan or something, but focuses on improvement and aiming for getting it right 80-90% of the time. His suggestions are divided into 12 sections that you can tackle over time, perhaps one per month for a year if a person is just trying to improve nutrition and build good habits. They range from things like cutting out artificial sweetener or eating more beans to eating a pound of vegetables per day. I found it really effective pre-surgery and it's an eating style I will be working to get back to as I am further out from surgery and have more capacity. Small changes you can sustain will do the most for building good habits for life.

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
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    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
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