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I am now a master farter!

Has this happened to anyone else? Since I have had surgery I do the loudest, longest farts. I know it's not ladylike, but seriously, if I was a teenage boy I would be the life of the party. It has almost become a talent but as a 55 year old woman I don't have opportunities to show off my new talent. Is it just me or are there other farting champions out there?

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  • You are not alone. I am continually surprised and impressed with the quantity of gas I have coming out of me. Not during the day, but at 6am when I wake up. It sounds like frog mating season in my hou

  • LipstickLady
    LipstickLady

    BAHAHAHAHAHAA!! I love it. I can't wait to back up into my husband under the covers and let one rip. Payback after 18 years of enduring the same from him. WOOOOOT!!

  • AussieLady
    AussieLady

    Poot? No way! I used to do little, secret, powder puffs, but now they are thunder claps, atomic bombs, blow your ass off FARTS!!! And I am such a lady too, it's life shattering.

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Has this happened to anyone else? Since I have had surgery I do the loudest' date=' longest farts. I know it's not ladylike, but seriously, if I was a teenage boy I would be the life of the party. It has almost become a talent but as a 55 year old woman I don't have opportunities to show off my new talent. Is it just me or are there other farting champions out there?[/quote']

Hello !

Beside your farting ... How do you feel ? Was surgery worth it?

I am from Sydney Australia ( having op in October)

Sounds like you are happy and comfortable !

I can't wait for my surgery ( can't wait to fart! Anything is better then lugging around excess fat !

  • Author

It has been great. I am really happy with my weight loss and how I look now. I had surgery in November and lost 30 kilos really quickly. I want to lose another 10 but decided to slow my loss down for a while as I did not want the hair loss problem. Have been on holiday for the last 2 weeks but when I go home I am going to get back onto the diet. The good news has been that in the past I would go on holiday and put on 5 kilos in 2 weeks but this time I have enjoyed myself with food and the occasional cocktail but my weight has remained the same. It was a great investment for me.

At five and a half weeks out, I find that my farts are finally starting to weaken a bit.. but they were SO powerful and LOUD after surgery. I was shocked! I always had little sneaky quiet ones before. Holy heck, now they seriously sound like I'm sitting on a whoopi cushion. I was staying with my sister for two weeks post op, and my five year old nephew even felt the need to inquire... "Auntie, How come you fart so much now?"

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BAHAHAHAHAHAA!! I love it. I can't wait to back up into my husband under the covers and let one rip. Payback after 18 years of enduring the same from him. WOOOOOT!!

At five and a half weeks out' date=' I find that my farts are finally starting to weaken a bit.. but they were SO powerful and LOUD after surgery. I was shocked! I always had little sneaky quiet ones before. Holy heck, now they seriously sound like I'm sitting on a whoopi cushion. I was staying with my sister for two weeks post op, and my five year old nephew even felt the need to inquire... "Auntie, How come you fart so much now?"[/quote']

OMG it's 8:18am here in NY everyone in my house is sleeping but the fiend that I am I'm on VSG forum this literally had me crying . God bless your nephews curiosity .. Ahhaaahhaaaa lmmfao!!!

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You are not alone. I am continually surprised and impressed with the quantity of gas I have coming out of me. Not during the day, but at 6am when I wake up. It sounds like frog mating season in my house each morning.

But as far as you being the fart master, hmmm... I don't know. You must pass the test! Here, see this pebble? When you can fart and blow the pebble out of my hand before I close it and leave no skid marks - then and only then will you be the FART MASTER!

post-46516-13813664865126_thumb.jpg

I don't fart any more than usual but I did notice during the first six months or so that my farts had that extra special ingredient which made them doubly potent. Now either they have gone back to normal, or everyone else in the house has lost their sense of smell. One thing I know something is killing all our goldfish. I wonder if they're like parakeets.

  • Author
You are not alone. I am continually surprised and impressed with the quantity of gas I have coming out of me. Not during the day' date=' but at 6am when I wake up. It sounds like frog mating season in my house each morning.

But as far as you being the fart master, hmmm... I don't know. You must pass the test! Here, see this pebble? When you can fart and blow the pebble out of my hand before I close it and leave no skid marks - then and only then will you be the FART MASTER!

[/quote']

LOL, I am in Australia and I'd bet you are in America. I am good, but not that good!! Havent reached the cyclone rating yet.

Good to know! Thanks for NOT sharing!

I've had just the opposite effect. I USED to be the master tooter now even my son said he missed my toots. I just don't fart as much as I used to. Hardly ever now!!!

F U N N Y! Thankfully, I do not have this "skill", lol. I think if I did, I would be crying about my regret for havaing had the surgery. I'm with OP - for a 50 year old woman, I'm never in a position to show off with it :)

Veronica, my family would be so grateful! Since I've have the lapband, I get terrible gas.

Haha this made me spit my coffe out!

Congrats on your victorious farts. My toots have diminished since surgery. I'm thinking because of my lack of fruits and veggies. I'm hoping to regain some fart power once I'm on solid good phase :) but congrats again!! Haha funny topic

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