Feeling Fat And Depressed.

[Ready2BDone 7]

I have gone through 5 out of my 6 months of medically supervised weight loss, required by my insurance. My 5th month depressed me so bad. I gained 10 lbs. My doctor seems to think that it's because I ran out of my Water pills and at the time I was weighed, I hadn't been taking them. I am so sad, I feel like my weight loss journey (so far) has been at a stand still since August. I went to the hospital for pre-op testing. I was getting ready to do the upper GI test, and I mentioned to the nurse that I wasn't sure why I was even there because I hadn't even started the six month process (which I later discovered I had). So they called my surgeon's office and were told that I didn't need to EKG or blood work. So I have yet to have any of that done yet.

I have knee pain, and it's been ongoing for about two years ago. The doctors keep telling me that 90% of the pain is caused by weight. I have been flirting with 220's - 230's. At my five month appointment I was 239. That is so depressing to me! My sixth and final appointment is the week of Christmas. I am hoping I can do better and weigh less! With the knee pain it is so hard for me to exercise. I am just feeling like the surgery is too good to be true. I don't know where I am. I still need to come up with the $420 I need for the consultations with the dietician, exercise specialist, and nutritionist. It doesn't seem like a lot of money, but it is for me unfortunately. It's too bad insurance doesn't cover that, because that's the reason I have to come up with it. I just feel like the surgery is never going to happen for me, but I still have hope. I need to see the psychologist too. And what frustrates me is that I never got any types of results back from what pre-op testing I had done. I haven't heard form the surgeons office in a long time. They kept telling me that they would be the ones to contact me. And when I try to contact them I get a voicemail. I guess in a sense I am very impatient when it comes to this, because the voicemail says that I will get a response in up to three days, and that's not good enough for me! I am so stressed and frustrated.

I have asthma, and I notice that I use my inhaler a lot more now than I normally do. My mom even made a comment about how often I was using my inhaler. It is pathetic that I am using it right when I wake up in the mornings, which is something I shouldn't do. But I feel that it is contributed from the weight. I went to a concert with my sister, and her and I are both overweight, so I was leaning to the right a lot and by the time the concert was over I had horrible back pain. Needless to say those seats are not made for larger people at all. My clothes are wearing out because I refuse to buy new clothes since I plan to lose weight and I don't want to waste the money on new clothes that I am hoping to not wear for very long. I want this done and over with, NOW!! Sorry for my ranting and venting, I am done for now.

[Lissa 2,631]

(((Ready2BDone))) You're having a rough day. Take a hot bath, get a good night's sleep and it will all look better tomorrow. This WILL happen for you and you will rock the sleeve! You've come so far and done so well. Before surgery, I could gain 10 pounds in a few days from TOM or just regular bloating. Now, it seems like I lose no matter what. That will happen for you!!!

Good Luck!!!

[omamilam 11]

Carrie,

I am 250 now and know how you feel with your knees. I can not support my weight anymore and my knees ache. I too have trouble exercising and I have back problems as well.

Are you sure your insurance will not pay for your dietician if it is required before surgery and is ordered by your doctor? You should ask if that makes a difference. They may not cover it if you are just going on your own. If your doctor refers you to one it may change the status of the claim. Its worth a shot.

I got online and emailed my insurance and asked them which dieticians are covered by my plan and they sent me the names. Maybe you could email yours.

In order for your insurance to pay the claim, they want certain things documented each month. You need to find out what they want and see that the doctors office is following their protocol. If they do not you will not get approved or they may not pay the claim. Again, try to email them under "contact us". You can also look under your "Policy Bulletin" online and get exactly what they expect.

Keep your chin up Carrie, you are almost there. Sounds like you are further along in the processes than you thought.

[Sassygirl06 962]

you poor thing! I hope you get you approval as soon as possible. im sorry it has been so ruff! I remember feeling the same way. you look really young, so you will have really good results from the surgery, and will feel like you are starting your whole life from scratch. the only regret I have is not doing this sooner. hope you feel better. keep your chin up!

[time2liveagain 2]

Hi Ready2BDone, I feel your pain. I am also on month 5 and I have Knee & Back & through out my body issues. My doctor gave me whats called a Kenalog injection in both my knees in back August, which I do get every few months, because I knew that would be the only way I could get any exercise done. Well I need another one to get me through these last 2 months. I see my Rheumatologist next week but I'm having to really watch what I eat to try to keep the weight down. As long as your doctor documents for the insurance company why he feels you gained the weight, it should not be a problem. Please don't give up. I feel fat & depressed today too is why I decided to post something. So much so that I've decided to just skip Christmas with the family & stay in my house instead of meeting up at somebody else's house with everbody. I want this surgery so I just talk it out with my PCP when I run into a problem & if he is supporting you thru this he will make sure the ins co gets what they need to approve you.

[Catracks 865]

I have knee pain (prior surgery), the beginnings or arthritis in my back, eczema on my legs, pre-diabetic, fatty liver and gallstones.

Sister, I am a mess and I feel your pain.

Neither my nutrition appointment ($120) or psych eval ($250) were covered by insurance. I also have to pay $1500 for a lifetime of support, counseling, etc. A support group meets every Monday.

Also, my PPO insurance pays only 90% with a $300 deductible. I hate the price, but in the grand scheme of things, it's a deal!

Hang in there!

[UXgrrl 29]

I can so, so, so relate to what you're feeling right there. I know how it feels to be completely and totally fed up, how this whole g-d process is taking so long, and why aren't things working out the way it's supposed to. The medically supervised diet is supposed to be a test, to see if you will follow directions, and in a way you're supposed to fail. If you can diet off your weight, then you wouldn't need WLS, right? It feels like the whole system is set up to make this as hard as possible. Like it's a punishment for being fat in the first place. That's why I want to kick people in the teeth who believe that WLS is "the easy way out". If they only knew how hard it was to even QUALIFY for it... much less DO IT.

That being said, you have to get your mood up out of the gutter. A good attitude will carry through the end of this. You're so, so, so close. The advice that the others have been giving -- about taking a hot bath, being kind to yourself -- that's all good advice. The sooner you can figure out how to comfort yourself with things besides food, the better off you will be in the long run.

I'm sounding a tad bitter because I had my surgery almost a week ago and its just dawning on me now that I can no longer eat easily and mindlessly. Plus, I'm coming down with a headcold so I feel like poop. There's absolutely no way out of this except through it.

You can do it. Thousands of others have done this, and I'm sure at some point they all thought to themselves that they couldn't do it anymore. But they reached down inside of themselves and figured out how to keep moving forward, and you will too. And you will be SO PROUD of yourself, when you've accomplished this.

[New in 2012 14]

Hang in there, girl! You are so close -- and before long you will be really seeing the fruits of your long journey. We all have felt the exact same way at one point or another, of that I'm sure.

I have knee problems, and after a surgery for a torn meniscus, I realized that I'm on the edge of my future, that if I didn't do something now my weight would continue to interrupt my life. That's what got my attention, more than anything else, is the realization that I don't want to continue to carry this weight -- literally and metaphorically.

You have made the decision have been doing the hard work. Don't let this get in the way of the final goal.

You can do it!!