Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Social situations-post op...



Recommended Posts

I am 10 days post op and I have done great with the full liquid diet. Only two of my friends know I've had lap-band. I have been avoiding all of my friends at meal times and make up excuses as to why I can't go out for dinner etc. It wasn't that bad last week with everyone being out of town or being with their families, but this weekend people have been calling and texting and asking me to go out. How do you all cope with social eating? I miss my friends and I know it will get better on mushies, but I'm not allowed them until next Thursday. There isn't anything I can eat at most restaurants that is on the full liquid diet. I don't want people to think I've developed some eating disorder because I'm not eating at all. Help!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I avoided eating out for a long time because I didn't want to fess up, didn't want to make eating more complicated than it already was, and it's just too difficult to eat healthy eating out anyway. I did eventually share with my close friends, and everyone was way more supportive than I imagined. It's hard though. I meet new people now "after," and I don't want to tell any of them. But maybe you could go out and order Soup and say you'd eaten a big meal earlier in the day. Soup was always my fall back restaurant meal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have been house bound pretty much since surgery, I went out to a restaurant and even the Soup was not what i expected...I just say oh I already ate :) the whole food thing is not easy , but I am so excited and ready for this i just say I'm not hungry....but like i said only one family thing and one restaurant .....so that being said good luck :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, just be honest with people. I let everyone know before I had surgery and told them what to expect. Nobody jumped for joy, but they did not ride me either. I went to Breakfast with friends twice when I was on liquids. Took my shaker bottle of Protein Shake and joined in on the conversation. Nobody cares. Then when I was able to eat real food they often offer to share. I will do that if they are eating something I can eat. My surgery buddy told me to learn to eat vicariously through other people and I have. It's loads of fun until I get judgmental about what they are eating. That is when I keep my mouth shut. Keeps the words in and the food out! Good luck and enjoy your lap band.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes, I find it very hard to go out to eat! There are not alot of people I have told about my surgery and I am well over 4 years out. I personally did not feel it was nay of their business. I usually order Soup or a baked potato or a grilled veggie appetizer. You will be fine, it does take time and patience with yourself. Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm guessing that it would get easier when you can eat solid food, say an appetizers, Soup, baked potato, or some side dishes. I told everyone that I'm having a hernia operation and I'll use that as my excuse, hey you know that us (food) addicts are good liars when we need to.

But what do I know my surgery isn't till Monday.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone! I ended up telling my two friends tonight that my sister was making me dinner and I would come meet them afterwards. I got there when they were done eating, I ordered a virgin, frozen, strawberry margarita and only had 1 or 2 sips. I really ordered it so they wouldn't think something was up and I told them I wasn't drinking alcohol tonight because I still wasn't feeling great (I had told people I was sick with a GI bug/flu during surgery and recovery). I hate all the lies, but I don't think it is really anyone's business either. They, of course, had chips and guac at the table and kept asking me if I wanted any. It was surprisingly easy to say no. When I got home I had some sugar free jell-o :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just so you know, you can eat out and still be successful. I eat out at least once a week, sometimes more. I look to make good food choices and I usually stick with fish because it goes down easy. Besides which, I've found out how good fish really tastes. No one pays attention to how and what you are eating. That was my big worry but honestly...no one is watching you. I've gone out with plenty of people who are not aware I am banded and no one notices a thing. Oh, and I've lost over 70 lbs. since the beginning of the year so like I said...you can eat out and lose the weight. For me, it's very much a social thing and I refused to give that up...and didn't have to..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone! I ended up telling my two friends tonight that my sister was making me dinner and I would come meet them afterwards. I got there when they were done eating, I ordered a virgin, frozen, strawberry margarita and only had 1 or 2 sips. I really ordered it so they wouldn't think something was up and I told them I wasn't drinking alcohol tonight because I still wasn't feeling great (I had told people I was sick with a GI bug/flu during surgery and recovery). I hate all the lies, but I don't think it is really anyone's business either. They, of course, had chips and guac at the table and kept asking me if I wanted any. It was surprisingly easy to say no. When I got home I had some sugar free jell-o :)

You only have 2 ways of dealing with this situation tell them or not. If a white lie bothers you - tell them, if it's none of there business - tell them a white lie!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just so you know, you can eat out and still be successful. I eat out at least once a week, sometimes more. I look to make good food choices and I usually stick with fish because it goes down easy. Besides which, I've found out how good fish really tastes. No one pays attention to how and what you are eating. That was my big worry but honestly...no one is watching you. I've gone out with plenty of people who are not aware I am banded and no one notices a thing. Oh, and I've lost over 70 lbs. since the beginning of the year so like I said...you can eat out and lose the weight. For me, it's very much a social thing and I refused to give that up...and didn't have to..

I agree with you, but it is hard when you are still on full liquid diet and only 10 days post op! I have now successfully navigated 2 social situations with food! No one has said a thing to me about not eating :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I didn't tell anyone except my dad. I generally stick to Soup whenever possible at a restaurant. It's not easy especially in the beginning stages, but it will get easier.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with you, but it is hard when you are still on full liquid diet and only 10 days post op! I have now successfully navigated 2 social situations with food! No one has said a thing to me about not eating :)

Sorry beanie...I meant once you are eating solids. Agree with you 100%...it's very hard at this stage. I just wanted you to know that you have something to look forward to.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am a little worried about dinners at my father's and dinners at my in laws, as neither know about my surgery. Only my mother and husband know and I feel like it is no one else's business. If I go out to a restaurant, I feel I will at least have the power to choose what to eat and can stick with Soup or something I know.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am a little worried about dinners at my father's and dinner's at my in laws' date=' as neither know about my surgery. Only my mother and husband know and I feel like it is no one else's business. If I go out to a restaurant, I feel I will at least have the power to choose what to eat and can stick with Soup or something I know.[/quote']

Good luck. I totally understand.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

- I'm getting over a stomach bug

- had a late lunch

- allergies are making things not taste good

- I'm on SUCH a Soup kick lately!!!

- OMG, I was SO hungry, now I'm stuffed after two bites. Guess I was over-hungry. I'll just take it home and have Round 2 later...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BeanitoDiego

      I changed my profile image to a molecule of protein. Why? Because I am certain that it saved my life.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • eclarke

      Two years out. Lost 120 , regained 5 lbs. Recently has a bout of Norovirus, lost 7 pounds in two days. Now my stomach feels like it did right after my surgery. Sore, sensitive to even water.  Anyone out there have a similar experience?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Eve411

      April Surgery
      Am I the only struggling to get weight down. I started with weight of 297 and now im 280 but seem to not lose more weight. My nutrtionist told me not to worry about the pounds because I might still be losing inches. However, I do not really see much of a difference is this happen to any of you, if so any tips?
      Thanks
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Well recovering from gallbladder removal was a lot like recovering from the modified duodenal switch surgery, twice in 4 months yay 🥳😭. I'm having to battle cravings for everything i shouldn't have, on top of trying to figure out what happens after i eat something. Sigh, let me fast forward a couple of months when everyday isn't a constant battle and i can function like a normal person again! 😞
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×