Home Alone

[paula 4]

So my 10 year old has two friends that are allowed to stay home ALONE for short periods of time - 30 minutes or less. When mom needs to run to the store or pay a bill.

I dont know y'all... whats the appropriate age for this?

((((Im asking because I have a job where I may have to make short (very short) delivery's in my neighborhood - just every so often. And sometimes my kids are still sleeping, getting ready for school, etc... when Im phoned to make these quick trips. Its just so much easier to jump in the car and go alone - then load the entire bus full for a 3 minute ride down the street. )))

[NJChick 3]

IMHO it depends on the kid. Some are more responsible than others. But, I don't think I would leave my DD alone at the age of 10. Maybe 12 or more.

Heck.... maybe when she's in college

[lianna 3]

I think a 10 year old is probably responsible enough to leave home alone for 30 minutes or less. They are able to understand rules like 'dont answer the door, dont go outside, dont try to cook anything, 911, etc...'. However, if the 10 year old is the OLDEST of several children it is a little different. IMO, That is not quite old enough to leave in charge of younger children.

[Iziksmom 0]

My son is 10 and I have yet to leave him home alone. I am one of those overprotective parents. He's an only child so it's easier for me to load one up than two or three. I think it depends on the maturity level (if there's such a thing for a 10 yr. old ha ha) and how long you'll be gone. Mine is also afraid he'll miss out on something if he stays at home... I'm thinking though I should start testing the waters on him soon and see how it goes. But for now, it's "let's go!"

[JanetC 2]

I thought the federally allowed age for staying home alone was 12, but looks like I was mistaken!

http://parenting.ivillage.com/tweens/twdevelopment/0,,45vp,00.html

I agree with the article... start small & make sure they know what you expect. And have a place to write what's up if you leave when they're asleep. Maybe a note just outside their door or in the bathroom?

[Alexandra 55]

I guess I'm one of those UNDER-protective parents. I've left my 7 y.o. alone, even WITH her younger sister, on two occasions when I've had to run to the store. Now, the store is literally a mile away and my older daughter knows how to call me on my cell phone, so I'm really not concerned about her safety.

The last time I did it, though, she and her sister thought it would be very funny to hide from me when I got home. The younger one doesn't quite get the concept of "hide," thankfully, so I saw her crouching behind the couch and instantly glommed onto the situation. I had a talk later with the older girl and explained how now--because of this silly trick they tried to play on me--I am not going to leave them alone again until she is 8.

She is a very responsible girl and understands what is dangerous to do--she knew that hiding from me wasn't dangerous; she just thought it would be funny. I explained that resonsibility also means knowing when NOT to try to be funny. She got it, and I'm absolutely confident it will be fine to leave her and her sister alone briefly in the future. But not until she is 8.

This is a long way of saying that 10, if the child is responsible, doesn't seem at all too young to me. I was regularly at home alone after school a couple of days a week from 1st grade on, waiting for my mother to get home.

[Iluvharleys 15]

I think it depends on the child, and the neighborhood too. My oldest son could be left alone for short periods of time, but the youngest one, no way! We lived out in the country, so it wasn't a problem there either.

[JanetC 2]

LOL, Alex! It sounds like you've got great kids! Love the story!

[paula 4]

she and her sister thought it would be very funny to hide from me when I got home.

I actually laughed out loud on that one! Sounds like my Anne's kind of fun!

My 10 yr old IS responsible. But just like the article and others said - it depends on the kid!

Although Im NOT referring to "babysitting", just being home alone for a very small amount of time.

[Infaith 1]

Paula,

I think leaving a pretty responsible 10 y/o for 30 minutes is fine. Even better if you have a cell phone and they know how to reach you or for you to reach them if you are running late.

Just my thoughts.

[StrawartS 2]

My parents were like Alex - I was left alone starting at about age 7, and from the 3rd grade on, I was a latch key kid.

Is anyone else a little creeped out that there's a LAW about this? I'm not a fan of government intervention making it harder for single moms and those who can't afford child care to raise their kids.

[DonnaB 3]

I am SO with you on this StrawartS! Guidelines are a good idea - laws ARE NOT. Not a fan of big government here either, it's just too easy to slide into a police state.

Yikes, I just broke a cardinal rule and discussed politics in public! I hope nobody blasts me for it.

[3loves 0]

The thought of this terrifies me. My kids are only 5 yrs and 3.5 yrs so this issue will be down the road for us. I am a border-line paranoid mother. I do allow my kids to play outside without me, but do keep a watchful eye and check on them quite often. We live in the country.

Something to consider is that you can have the most responsible child in the world, but there are predators out there. The number of predators seem to be higher in this day and age. I would worry about some perve watching mommy leave the house knowing the kids were there alone.

In the tiny town were my husband works, a co-worked experienced (I should say her daughter) an attempted abduction. The man tried to pull her into a white van. Here in our town a perve was passing out flyer's at the local high school for a slumber party. He was arrested. He was also a registered sex offender.

Here's a good website with links to all the states so you can look up sex offenders in your area. http://www.insor.org/insasoweb/general/resources.jsp;jsessionid=aoCdnXjGIaYRadKgkO4e2Q**.prodejb06 Knowledge is power and I will do my best to stay informed of who is living close by. My claws would come out if I find someone looking at my children....what mother wouldn't?

I may consider leaving them alone SOME day. BUT....that is a scary thought to me right now.

[CCBSTX 0]

I have a 17 year old and 11 years old. I let my son stay alone for short periods, age 10 or 11. My daughter is 11 and I leave her alone for short periods of time, longer if her brother is around.

Just give them the rules laid out. (locked doors, letting answering machine pick up call).

They advent of cell phones has made it much easier for them to contact you. Of course, we have great neighbors.

I always think, I am rearing future adults. Allowing them little freedoms and independence gives them confidence and teaches them how to behave in the "real world."

Shawn

[I'llsucceed 1]

I think a 10 year old is probably responsible enough to leave home alone for 30 minutes or less. They are able to understand rules like 'dont answer the door, dont go outside, dont try to cook anything, 911, etc...'. However, if the 10 year old is the OLDEST of several children it is a little different. IMO, That is not quite old enough to leave in charge of younger children.

THis is exactly my thoughts. I will add that if you do start to ween a 10 yr old certain responsiblities it can & will help them grow to be very confident & responsible adults. As long as they understand that inappropriate actions & responses have ramifications.IMO