Will be banded in two weeks and I am totally not looking foward to dining with my friends in the future. I havent told anyone except hubbie and adult kids. i dont plan to tell anyone else but I dont know how I will deal in dining situations and people wonder why I've only eaten a few bites. How do you deal?

Golden

I share a meal with my daughter or order off the appetizer menu. I am two years plus post surgery and I no longer worry about what anyone thinks about how I eat. If you make a big deal out of it, they will too. Also, get doggie bags...

I have a couple of restaurants where my family eats regularly and they know that I will always ask for a split meal. They don't even bring the whole meal out, they just split it in the kitchen and being it out all bagged and ready to go home.

I was also pretty worried about this before surgery (I'm 5 months out now). So much of my social life revolves around meals; dinner with family, lunch with friends, etc. From my experience, it's actually not that big of a deal. The good thing about these social situations is that there is usually so much socializing going on, nobody really pays attention to what I'm eating. If I do get the "why aren't you eating your lunch" question, I'll just say that I'm not very hungry, or I had a late breakfast/lunch, whatever it may be. If everyone is ordering dessert, I decline and just say that I'm watching what I eat. I'm not lying (okay, maybe by ommision, but a girl needs some secrets!) because I am watching what I eat. When the waiter comes by to check on the meal, I ask for a to-go box and portion off what I'm not going to eat (to avoid mindless over-eating).

Restaurants can be a challenge if you're focused on eating healthy. More and more though, restaurants are starting to have healthier options on their menu. I just make sure that I don't get too wrapped up in conversation that I forget to chew thoroughly. I've never been "stuck" in a social situation, and don't want to be!

this is me... I've only told a handful of people. I have a range of different excuses, here are a few...

- I just started seeing a nutritionist and I'm super gung-ho about it

- I feel like I might be coming down with something

- I had a big lunch

- I'm trying a new portion control diet and am only eating the size of my hand, but every 3 hours

- etc etc...

GOOD LUCK!!!

I usually order a regular sized meal and then say I'm not hungry. I can eat about a cup of food and I spread the rest around. I eat really slowly too. I haven't told anyone outside of family that I've been banded and still no one has asked me about why I eat so much less. It'll be ok. I always tell them hubby will be glad I brought home leftovers. And if I know they're having dessert (like Sat was at a bday party) I save a tiny room to take a bite or two of dessert just so know one asks. You'll be ok... hang in there!

It is a personal choice you have to make. I eat out all the time and I have a social job, so there is no shyness allowed for me. I just say it like it is (for me) and I have had no problems or rude comments from anyone. They will just have to get over it because what I am doing is for me. It's all about me!

Now days, most everyone is begging for my leftovers! Do what is comfortable for you.

Most restaurants also have a nutrion menu if you ask. I did that a lot until I learned what was ok to eat. You would be really surprised if you looked at one! A lot of restaurants will make your choice healthier if you just ask. I always ask them to use cooking spray instead of oils and no added butters or sauces.

It does work, just takes some adjustments to make on your part. I still love to eat out with friends, they even let me taste stuff now!

All you have to say is that you are watching your portions. The less of a big deal you make of it the less your friends will be concerned about it. I have found people just don't care what I am eating.

Hopefully I'll be banded before the end of the year. What I'm concerned about is when my husband and I go out to dinner with our good friends, who I don't plan on telling about the band. We go out once or twice a month, but always have a cocktail first at the bar. I realize I can't drink at least a half hour before and after eating, but it will look strange if I sit there and don't have a drink in front of me, or don't sip from one I might order as a "prop". Any suggestions?

Barbara

Hopefully I'll be banded before the end of the year. What I'm concerned about is when my husband and I go out to dinner with our good friends' date=' who I don't plan on telling about the band. We go out once or twice a month, but always have a cocktail first at the bar. I realize I can't drink at least a half hour before and after eating, but it will look strange if I sit there and don't have a drink in front of me, or don't sip from one I might order as a "prop". Any suggestions?

Barbara[/quote']

You can drink up until you eat, (probably not cocktails) but drinking BEFORE isn't the problem. The real issue is drinking while you eat or too quickly after you finish your meal. Not being able to drink while eating was one of the biggest challenges for me after being banded, but now it's been over two years and its just routine.

As for the cocktails, I was told no alcohol for one year by my surgeon. I had to go on some new medication shortly after the one year date passed so I haven't had alcohol since the surgery. Don't really miss it...

t always have a cocktail first at the bar. I realize I can't drink at least a half hour before and after eating, but it will look strange if I sit there and don't have a drink in front of me, or don't sip from one I might order as a "prop". Any suggestions?

I run into the same problem weekly...all I do is order a Water with lemon or lime and take a few tiny sips while everyone else is downing their 200 calorie drink. I havent been shy about telling people I am dieting so its been no big deal. And since I have lost a ton of weight its pretty obvious. I dont have time for people who think its a problem or are overly concerned with my eating habits and quite honestly it hasnt been a problem for me at all.

Thank you rkimom and floridays! Just having sips of anything will help me not to feel so out of place. I won't miss my occasional martini; feeling so much better by getting rid of this extra weight will be more than worth the sacrifice.

Barbara

I wish people would'nt exagerate how little they eat. At proper restriction you should be able to eat 3 oz of solid protein and about1/2 cup veggies. That is not just a couple bites! I've eaten in front of many people who don't know I've been banded and no one ever comments about how little I eat.

My husband and I share a lot. It is a little awkward sometimes and I have gotten weird looks from waiters when I ask for a box, but it isn't a big deal.

Frankly, I drink with friends all the time. I've stopped drinking at home (which I used to do a lot) and I may need to cut down more when my weight loss slows, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. For now, social drinking a couple of times a week hasn't affected my weight loss.