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In Mourning

I'm almost ashamed to admit this, but i think I'm mourning food as it was before. It just goes to show how much of an addiction it was for me.

My husband is deployed, tonight I miss him and I can't sit down and eat candy or chips. The sad thing is if I hadn't had a fill today I think I would try it .

I've been told we ( bandsters ) often go through this at some point. I'm almost ashamed to post this but I'm sure some of you have been where I am tonight..

Have you ever crave that full feeling you use to get ?

JDuran

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  • I don't know if it's the feeling I crave, but I do crave the habit of eating chips, etc. To be honest I have still done that since banding....I fall off the wagon sometimes. Just have to get back on.

  • Mlivingston04
    Mlivingston04

    i was just telling my husband that I really needed my head and stomach to talk. Even when my stomach is full my head acts likes it wants to eat. I really need the two of them to get on the same page

  • You're not alone. Not being able to eat has brought up a lot of ooooooold emotional issues. I seem to be over the hump and back to feeling well again emotionally, but it is hard. One night I was going

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I don't know if it's the feeling I crave, but I do crave the habit of eating chips, etc. To be honest I have still done that since banding....I fall off the wagon sometimes. Just have to get back on.

At least you are realizing that it's feelings you're really trying to medicate! Try to find something else to do - go for a walk, call a friend, get out of the house if you can & away from your temptations!

i was just telling my husband that I really needed my head and stomach to talk. Even when my stomach is full my head acts likes it wants to eat. I really need the two of them to get on the same page.

I think I morned food the entire 10 days I was on the liquid diet.

Hang in there and try to keep yourself busy, especially keep your hands busy.

You're not alone. Not being able to eat has brought up a lot of ooooooold emotional issues. I seem to be over the hump and back to feeling well again emotionally, but it is hard. One night I was going so insane I had to go to a movie just to escape the crazy in my head!! Good luck. You'll be ok. But feel free to talk about anything here!

I have gone through it as well. I was down a couple months ago and was truly angry I couldn't sit with a bag of Reese Peanut Butter miniatures and drown my sorrows in junk. I still have to regularly ask myself "am I head hungry or actually hungry?", especially at night.

Hang in there, we'll win this battle!

  • Author

I just never realized how much food played a role in my life.. I feel like I've lost a best friend.. Tomorrow is a new day..

I completely empathize and can relate to this death we have encountered, maybe a divorce from the food we know before the band, a tiny depression or sense of loss from what we thoroughly enjoyed. I'm a social and emotional eater, a happy celebration personality. I've had to adjust to this journey. I have taken a liking to excercise (crazy, right?). I think my second year of banding needs more support as we continue forward.

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What I miss more then anything is being able to chug a drink.. Just down a powerade or soda... Really brings me dowm

I'm not going to lie the emotional connection to food is a real thing. But what about the empotional connection to our bodies, and trying to honnor our lap band and what we are trying to do for ourselves? Try to examine what is leading you to eat (fight with someone, joy?, anger? bordom?" .

Ask yourself are you truly hungery?

have something to drink and wait an hour

durring that hour do something else, chores, read, activity.

Then if hunger is still there have something healthy.

Look at your body and note the changes(outlines of bones, firmer tummy and shrinking butt).

This is a journey and we can't mis use our tool.

hang in there .

I went though the initial surgery and did the Mourning in 08. I had fluid backed out because at the time I was on the edge I think and a bit overfilled and was going to lose health insurance. I gained back some then almost two weeks ago finally got my first fill again to 7cc, my first refill since June of 09. I also went through feeling bummed and you hit the nail on the head 'mourning for food'. I actually admitted it to my hubby and talked through it. I am fortunate that he is very supportive and has adapted my band diet as his own as well even though I never expected him to or even asked. He has found that his slight tummy has started to flatten and says he feels better. The mourning is helped alot when you feel the difference in your clothing, at least for me. Like my Surgeon said "If you really want something have a bit, you might find you really don't miss it" This way it will stop you from going crazy if you deny yourself on a constant basis. I found for me that having a bit here or there keeps the feeding frenzy under control.

One hundred percent agree! So many things I felt I really really needed and took one bite and went why on earth did I ever eat this?

OMG!! Totally feel the same...I was definitely in mourning about how my relationship with food has changed. I still think I am feeling sad over it. I started getting some support from a therapist because my support group my surgeon runs is not close by. I sometimes miss my "old life"...how sad is that to admit??? I got banded on April 16th and had my first fill last week. I am down 21 pounds and am so thrilled. Each day is a struggle but it is getting better. I have to begin to exercise more so hopefully the weight will continue to come off quicker.

Once again...if it wasn't for this website I would of packed it up...this has been a lifesaver!!!

What I miss the most is the ability to drink an ice cold pepsi. Man, I didn't realize the enjoyment I get from that. I also miss the ability to eat a cheeseburger and fries, or pizza. I would not choose to give back the 70 pounds I have lost for anything, but I do miss the ability to eat as before. I just ate to much of it...lol

MsDuran, you have every right o mourn, just try to not do it for food. We are here for you; and know it is hard especcially with your hubby deployed, again. TAke care and keep n touch with us because we care, too! KAren

  • Author
MsDuran' date=' you have every right o mourn, just try to not do it for food. We are here for you; and know it is hard especcially with your hubby deployed, again. TAke care and keep n touch with us because we care, too! KAren[/quote']

Thank you so much... :)

do you have people you can call? It must be lonely without your husband. the night time is the hardest time.

I will pray for strength. I have been in the same emotional state myself, I did not resist. I got back to normal "good' food the next day but, I felt like @#$%, I don't want to feel that way. I know it is temporary but keeping busy and keeping in touch with loved ones really helps.

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