Friend Wants Me To Go Out To Dinner & Drinks...(Not)

[Lilbelly 31]

I have a close friend that we always spent 1 night a week going out for drinks and dinner. I told her I can't do it anymore. I feel bad, but want to tell her the truth! Have any of you gone or going through this? I won't even go out to dinner with my hubby yet, I told him I can't handle it. I have been dieting 3 weeks now, lost 6 lbs. I don't want to ruin what I have accomplished. My hubby understands my friend thinks I am to obsessed. ugh... I am not banded yet but waiting for a date!

[waitingpatiently 250]

You need to do what is right for you. If eating out is going to sabatage you then you are wise to stay away. If you aren't ready to tell her that you are having surgery, but don't want to leave her hanging, I would suggest maybe you could have dinner at your house.....more work for you, but you get to control the menu and can still spend some time with your friend.

[Lilbelly 31]

Thanks for replying but I have told her about my choice of having surgery. She thinks I can do this without such a drastic decision by getting the lap band. I explained to her I can't. She is nervous for me. At the same point I feel a little jealousy coming from her about this and how I might look in the future.

[Toddy 758]

You can't stop living your life. You need to learn how to have a good time, while making good choices. I always check out the online menu when going out to eat, and I tell the person I'm going with exactly what I'm going to order so I'm less apt to stray and order something I shouldn't.

[elcee 3,340]

You may not be ready yet but there is no reason why at some point in the future you won't be able to have a weekly dinner date with your friend. You can still enjoy her company and you will just eat less and drink less. I have 1 bunch of friends that I go out for lunch with once a month. I still enjoy their company I just don't eat as much as them. Yesterday was great because a number of them have just started WW so 1 of my friends decided she didn't want a full meal she would prefer to share. That suited me down to the ground. I got to eat about the same quantity as I normally do but it only cost me half as much!

[Jen75 33]

What about going out for a coffee or tea and chatting somewhere at a coffee house. I agree with elcee and toddy, no reason down the road you wouldn't be able to enjoy her company and a meal out. Remember, this is a lifestyle change, not a reprimand. Don't lose site of yourself but also try not to stop living your everyday life either. Best of luck!

[pink dahlia 2,513]

why cant you go out for dinner ? have a salad before you leave the house and then have an appetizer for your dinner. skip the alcoholic drink , or just have 1 and sip Water or seltzer the rest of the evening. you can still live your life you just may have to make adjustments. Also, Applebees does a weight watchers menu and most resturants have a "lighter menu" too. You're going to need your friends so dont give up everything just to loose weight. good luck !