willowcat

When I read "in case anyone is interested," I just had to laugh--of course we're all interested! And you look FANTASTIC! Thanks so much for sharing your before and after pics--before I got banded it was pictures like yours that gave me hope that losing a lot of weight really was possible and not just a pipe dream. Congrats!

I've always donated clothes that don't fit--when I was going "up" and now that I've come "down." It's not good for your self-esteem to have clothes around that don't fit. Break with the old and embrace the new.

With apologies to Dr, Martin Luther King, Jr for corrupting his incredible words: I have a dream, that today, one day, my three children will be judged by the quality of their character rather than by the size of their bodies. Everyone wants to be valued for who they truly are on the inside (that's one of the reasons I love the movie Shallow Hal--it wasn't just about the girl being fat; it was also about others who were beautiful people on the inside but with "unattractive" outsides--Hal saw them as beautiful too). The people who've shared your photos and also the people at work can't help but look at your outsides and think it's a reflection of who you are--that's all they know; that's our whole society; that's human. Good for you, though, for drawing a line with your manager about her "work on your insides" comment (isn't it funny that the very thing that is someone's own problem is the very thing they see--or think they see--in others?! If SHE had been working on her insides, she would have known better than to say a thing like that to you). People are people. You've got no controll over them--only over yourself and your reaction to them. Decide whether confronting your bosses about their inappropriate comments or ignoring their inappropriate comments feels right to you and act on that from a position of strength. Neither way is "right." Eventually, though, I suspect that you may need to say to these people: "Thank you for your support as I've worked hard to lose so much weight, and now I need to ask that my weight--current and past--not be a topic of discussion at work. Thanks for understanding." And as for FB, well, you learned the hard way that nothing on there is really "private" and only shared with contacts of your choosing. You might want to review your postings on FB--if you don't want the whole world (literally!) to have access to something on your profile, better to delete it.

Thought I would just share something that has really helped me lately. I'd been having lots of trouble being "too tight", and had two partial unfills--still with problems. I realize now that I'm a gulper when it comes to eating. I thought that I was chewing enough (compared to my old ways, I was, but not enough for the band). Then, I was reading a book called Mindful Eating (which I would highly recommend by the way), and the author talked about "Fletcherizing' as a way to be mindful of the food in your mouth. Fletcher lived at the turn of the century (1900) and lost 40 pounds by chewing each mouthful 32 times (I found out later on the internet that he also spit out his food before eating it--he erroneously thought you could get enough "micro nutrients" just from the well-chewed food being in your mouth--no wonder he lost weight--he didn't actually eat!), BUT I tried counting my chews (and swallowing!) and found out that if I did indeed chew each mouthful at least 30 times, that I was no longer getting stuck. I was also able to savor the taste and textures of my food; I was able to dramatically lengthen my meal times; I was able to actually eat less and feel fuller and more satisfied! So "count me in" as a counter! For me, it's given me something tangible to help me follow the band rules of "chew, chew, chew, and chew some more). Also, I'm not afraid of losing my band anymore--whew!

Trisha, Hi! I haven't been on here in such a LONG time that I didn't know about all of your problems. Getting a new surgeon sounds like it was a smart thing to do for yourself. How has everything gone? Are you rebanded or sleeved now? I'm glad your daughter is having everything go well. Go easy on yourself, though. You didn't ask for your spleen and stomach to adhere to each other! After months of being too tight, I'm mostly unfilled and still getting stuck every now and then. Still, being able to actually EAT again feels so good and is such a relief. I hope all is well with you. Willowcat

Wow! I just noticed your weightloss ticker--awesome! I remember when you were just getting ready to have the band--and it doesn't seem like it was even a year ago--now look at you with just 33 lbs to go! I'd say that's pretty great (even if this "great guy" thread wasn't about you--ha ha!)! Congratulations!

Nice thread! My husband also has been wonderful every step of the way! I am so thankful for him. Whenever I got pouty, worried, scared, upset, doubtful, etc., with the pre-op diet, the surgery, and post banding living, he's always said something to help put me back on track. He's celebrated with me with every pound lost (but in a good way, not like "it's about time you're losing all that weight"--he was happy I was happy!). The only thing he doesn't like is when I've had to pb in front of him--that grosses him out (heck, it grosses me out too!).

When I was a little girl, the doctor told my grandfather that he would have to give up salt. My grandfather got sad/mad, threw a fit and said he'd rather be dead than give up his salt. He was dead within six months; he was 51 years old. My grandmother on the other hand, had to have her gallbladder removed and was told by her doctor that she'd have to give up fried food (my grandmother's specialty was fried chicken every Sunday for dinner). The rest of her life she'd say, "I can't eat that" when presented with anything greasy. She lived to be 91. When I was getting ready to have the band, I decided that I was going to choose to be like my grandmother. No drama. Just, "I can't eat that."

Where did the June Journeys (June 2009) social group go? Is it no more?

Yep--love it! I make my own vegetable soup from scratch so it's full of great vitamins. Since raw veggies and I don't seem to get along, this soup is one of the best ways for me to get my veggies. I find it quite filling. It may not last quite as long as some other foods, but like Humming Bird said, if it's a bit "chunky" it lasts longer. Though, I do try to eat the broth first and eat the veggies last (so they don't get washed away too quickly). Works for me.

Our bodies are interesting beings--no two are exactly alike! I've been banded almost 18 months and I still get left-shoulder pain--but only when I've eaten too much. Actually, I've come to recognize that when I "hear" that little twinge of pain, that it is now TIME to stop eating (or there will be unwelcome consequences). I totally get where you're coming from. I, too, read and researched and asked as much as I could before I got banded. I think that that's a smart thing to do--better safe than sorry. Still, sometimes you have to just hold your breath, take the plunge and hope for the best. I do hope for the best for you. Good luck!

Yes, I can see my port--standing, lying down, bending over... But I don't mind. It's a little lump--my husband says it looks like a little alien growing inside. Ha ha! I actually think it's kind of cool--in a wierd way, I know--I can move it around in different ways when I tighten/loosen different ab muscles. But, even at my highest weight, I never really had any fat on my upper abdomen (I'm quite pear-shaped), so now I really don't have any weight on my upper abdomen! No one can see it under clothes--even under a one-piece swimsuit it's not visible (but it is with a bikini). If you carry weight on your upper abdomen, you probably will never see your port (if they only could have buried my port somewhere in my a**!) I wouldn't let the possibility of seeing your port stop you from getting the band. Seeing the port's really not worth a second thought. Plus fills and unfills are really easy for my doctor! Good luck!

Numbers are just numbers. You have done amazingly well and have so much to be up-beat about. "Obese", "Overweight"--those are just labels. Ignore them. If your doctor is trying to motivate you to lose more weight, and you don't want to go below 215, then don't. It's YOUR body...not your doctor's. You are not beholden to him, and you don't have to live up to anyone's expectations except your own. Congrats on getting your life back! Good luck!

Hmm...I eat all kinds of things. I'm assuming you're not too tight? Oatmeal with peanut butter in it, toast with peanut butter and sliced fruit on it, shredded carrot salad, cucumber salad, lots of things rolled up in romain lettuce leaves (refried beans, chicken chunks, tuna, cottage cheese), mozerella stick with sliced turkey rolled around it, scrambeled eggs with sliced turkey and cheese melted in it, cereal and banana or other fruit...good luck...

Four summers ago I was told by the "lady" sitting next to me on an international flight from Germany that "People like you should have to buy two seats because you're so fat" (don't worry, I had some choice words for her, too!). So, my NSV this summer was a real delight: flying coach and having PLENTY of room! :smile:

Bravo! Congratulations on your scale and non-scale victories! Happy for you! :smile:

Thanks ladies! I know it's been stinking thinking. I "should" on myself sometimes too much. You're right about not being able to do this by myself--and keep it off for very long--if diets really worked, I would have been thin--god knows I worked hard at it! Your thoughts and support have been helpful. I will remember them the next time feelings of shame surface. Thank you.

I'm a little over one year post op. I've lost 100 lbs (with 50 more to go). I like the way I feel, move, and look. The lapband was a lifesaver! But sometimes I feel shame about having 1. been so fat and 2. not having been able to do this without the band. I think the feeling of SHAME is so uncomfortable for me, that I don't even entertain it long enough to examine it and see what it's all about. Losing with the band hasn't really been that hard, it seems as if I should have been able to have done this myself. When people comment on my weight loss (100 lbs doesn't go unnoticed that's for sure!), I always tell them I've had surgery--I don't want them thinking I've done this by myself. BUT I feel like I should have done this by myself, and I feel like there's something wrong with me because I had to resort to surgery. Sorry for the rambling. Sometimes I just need to see things in print. Have you dealt with feelings of shame around needing to have the band in order to be successful? I think I need to hear that this is "normal" stinking thinking so I can put this silly idea to rest.

Magic Bullet

Jackslapband, I think that of course, depending on your height, that your stomach is bigger than a woman's. Feet, hands, noses, heads all come in different sizes--stomachs must too--it only makes sense. IMO, nutritionists who show you those little cups are just trying to get you to think smaller when it comes to portions. My nutritionist said that my meals should be no more than 1/2 cup of food (4oz) because that's all my pouch could hold. I looked at her and said that 1/2 cup of food on my plate was not the same thing as 1/2 cup of well-chewed food. She agreed with me. Measuring or even eyeballing my food doesn't help me. I start out with small portions and then try really hard to listen for the "full" signal. I'm finding out that what I can actually eat is about 1/2 of what I think I can eat! I think you're probably fine, but start thinking smaller (sounds like you already are) when it comes to portions. Good luck.

I totally know what you're talking about! I also had excruciating pain at night between my shoulder blades. Funny thing is, very few here seem to have had that problem. I don't know the reason for the pain (though I suspect it has something to do with the nerves from the stomach to the spine), but I do know that it was very, very real. I would wake up in the middle of the night from the pain, and eventually I noticed that I was also quite hungry. I started keeping a low-fat, mozerella cheese stick on my nightstand. When the pain between my shoulder blades would wake me up, I would eat the cheese stick, the pain would subside, and I could fall back to sleep. Sometimes, putting the heating pad directly under that spot would help with the pain, too (though not as much as eating would help). Since you're on mushies right now, maybe some yogurt or a protien drink would help? I'm not a medical professional, but I've postulated that the stomach contractions from being hungry activated the nerves to that area of my back (just as the pressure on your diaphragm from the operative gas can cause pain in your left shoulder). I do see a chiropractor who later told me that the nerves for your stomach originate in that part of your spine. My chiropractor is one of those "hands on" kind of adjusters. For at least the first six months, that part of my spine was always out of alignment. I've also read on this board that someone constantly had pain between her shoulder blades and eventually discovered that she had scarring adhesions from the band. I think she eventually had her band removed. You might want to do a search for "pain between shoulder blades" and see if you can find her thread. I certainly don't mean to scare you, but I know when I complained to my surgeon about the horrible pain, he was at a loss and had never heard about anyone having that problem after banding. I'm a year post-op and haven't had that pain for probably four months now (but I also don't wake up hungry in the middle of the night anymore either--I usually have a cup of milk everynight before I go to bed now). I haven't seen my chiropractor in probably six months. I'd say listen to YOUR body and see what works for you. Good luck!

Sorry, Hal, but I believe you are at a LOSS for words (but then maybe you were being ironic?). =) The problem with using "loose" for "lose" and "your" for "you're" is that it trips the reader up for just a little bit--the reader has to make a quick double-back and reread to get your meaning correct. But as others have said, this forum is such a great place to get information, support, and encouragement, that a few mistakes in grammar and/or spelling are not really such a big deal. Thnx 2 evry1 4 riting & sharing!

I've lost 100 of the 150 I had to lose! Now for the last 50!

You look great! Way to go!

Since the band is adjustable, if you feel like the restriction you're getting with the band is too much, you can always have the band unfilled and go back to normal eating. I think that's part of the beauty of the band--it isn't one-size-fits-all. Some people keep their bands really tight, some keep them loose, and most keep them somewhere in between. You'll get to decide what's right for you. There's no "forced restriction" except for whatever level you're comfortable with. Binging in my experience is more about satisfying mental/emotional needs than it is about satisfying physical hunger. The band won't help with that part of overeating. I'm never "really hungry" anymore--hunger for me actually HURTS, and I can't tough it out for very long. The way I understand the mechanics of what makes the band work is two-fold: 1. It makes a smaller stomach--less food is eaten. 2. The satiety nerves (the ones that tell your brain that you're full and feel satisfied because you've had enough to eat) are at the bottom of your esophagus/top of your stomach. So that when this smaller portion of food fills up your tiny tummy, it hits the satiety nerves so much faster than before, and you've basically "tricked" your brain into believing that that small amount of food is plenty. And it works! I don't feel hungry. My cravings for most foods (chocolate cravings at pms time are still strong) has all but diminished. Food does not have the Iron grip on me that it had before. My husband and I still like to go out and eat. I do have to be careful about what I eat, but that's because that's the way I'm choosing to live. I love being 100 lbs thinner and wouldn't trade that for anything. The band is the best thing I've ever done for myself (except for getting a college degree and also except for marrying my best friend). It's good that you're thinking and asking questions about what is concerning you. That's how you'll end up knowing if the band is the right tool for you (for some people it isn't the right tool). Good luck to you!