Allie Still

Agreed!!! I think a lot of folks who have struggled with coming to terms with/ accepting their sexuality have also struggled with food or body image!

So again, this is a tool to use. It is not a quick fix nor is it an easy way for you to lose weight and still keep your bad eating habits. It changes your physiology to make your weight loss chances more permanent. The rest is up to you. Now this is going to sound harsh but it is on YOU to do the research about any procedure before you have it. It is on YOU to do what is required to make a procedure like this work. To proclaim it bullshit because you don't want to put in the work is not placing the responsibility where it belongs.
What are you eating? Is it fried food? Carbs? Cookies? chips? Are you getting any exercise? Because if you are still eating garbage and sitting around on the couch then, yeah, you're screwed.

Highest weight (when I made the appointment) 385 January 2021 now I'm 235- 150lbs down total. 175 is my goal weight but honestly not sure I wanna be that small or not, kinda loving where I'm at... sans the apron of skin 😆

Almost 100 pounds down and there are the changes I was expecting and excited for and some surprise ones!! Basic things like shaving are SO much easier! Sitting ay my desk with my legs crossed comfortably. Not being winded from doing menial tasks. Not being scared to go to the doctor because they were just going to tell me all my problems were my weight. Not shuddering when I see pictures of myself! The list goes on and on and I suspect will continue to grow as I lose the reming weight!

I'm 21 weeks out post VSG and I had the same thing for the first 3ish months! It goes away over time, just make sure you are staying hydrated and hitting your Protein goals and try to power through. I suspect it was fade away over time like mine did! I know it's no fun though, it left me feeling like I had made a mistake for a couple of months!

Almost 100 pounds down and there are the changes I was expecting and excited for and some surprise ones!! Basic things like shaving are SO much easier! Sitting ay my desk with my legs crossed comfortably. Not being winded from doing menial tasks. Not being scared to go to the doctor because they were just going to tell me all my problems were my weight. Not shuddering when I see pictures of myself! The list goes on and on and I suspect will continue to grow as I lose the reming weight!

Almost 100 pounds down and there are the changes I was expecting and excited for and some surprise ones!! Basic things like shaving are SO much easier! Sitting ay my desk with my legs crossed comfortably. Not being winded from doing menial tasks. Not being scared to go to the doctor because they were just going to tell me all my problems were my weight. Not shuddering when I see pictures of myself! The list goes on and on and I suspect will continue to grow as I lose the reming weight!

I WISH I had done this surgery when I was 23! I was probably about the same size as you at that age (just turned 30) with no health issues either. I've always struggled with my weight and have gone up and down with diets too many times to count. Nothing stuck for me. I realized this year that I needed to do something to make it stick before I developed any major health issues related to my weight (my BP was elevated and had fatty liver but everything else was ok). If you are confident that you can do it on your own and be able to stick with it then the surgery may not be for you! I know that, for a long time, I was confident I would do it on my own but I just couldn't. I think you know yourself best! Trust your gut! The surgery did come with pain and major life changes but it is 1000% the best thing I've done for myself. All this to say, trust yourself to make the right choice for you! This site really helped me when I was making the decision!

I WISH I had done this surgery when I was 23! I was probably about the same size as you at that age (just turned 30) with no health issues either. I've always struggled with my weight and have gone up and down with diets too many times to count. Nothing stuck for me. I realized this year that I needed to do something to make it stick before I developed any major health issues related to my weight (my BP was elevated and had fatty liver but everything else was ok). If you are confident that you can do it on your own and be able to stick with it then the surgery may not be for you! I know that, for a long time, I was confident I would do it on my own but I just couldn't. I think you know yourself best! Trust your gut! The surgery did come with pain and major life changes but it is 1000% the best thing I've done for myself. All this to say, trust yourself to make the right choice for you! This site really helped me when I was making the decision!

I WISH I had done this surgery when I was 23! I was probably about the same size as you at that age (just turned 30) with no health issues either. I've always struggled with my weight and have gone up and down with diets too many times to count. Nothing stuck for me. I realized this year that I needed to do something to make it stick before I developed any major health issues related to my weight (my BP was elevated and had fatty liver but everything else was ok). If you are confident that you can do it on your own and be able to stick with it then the surgery may not be for you! I know that, for a long time, I was confident I would do it on my own but I just couldn't. I think you know yourself best! Trust your gut! The surgery did come with pain and major life changes but it is 1000% the best thing I've done for myself. All this to say, trust yourself to make the right choice for you! This site really helped me when I was making the decision!

Here are some articles that might help him understand the science, including the fact that it isn't fully understood yet and is multifactorial. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/unexpected-clues-emerge-about-why-diets-fail/
https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2017/12/7/16587316/bariatric-surgery-weight-loss-lap-band ... let me know if you need more articles. There is the other thing : people in societal groups that are favored (dudes, thin people, youth, the wealthy, the physically well etc...without getting too far into the politics of this) don't have to see things from a non-favored person's perspective (women, overweight people, people over 40, poor people, the infirm, etc...) because they are the recipients of most of society's advantages. In short, they are not forced to understand the other side. We are forced to, so we end up seeing things from both perspectives—the dominat, favored one because it is forced in our faces every day and our own because it is our reality in the face of that. Thin/fit people who love us need to aspire to a true medical understanding of the issue. (it would be great if dudes would likewise attempt to form a more educated understanding of women's historical struggle but let's not get too ambitious) Granted, this seems difficult, even for some of our own physicians, but we must reach for it, or we will never see it realized. Thin people also have to understand that obesity is a medical issue that has causes that are genetic, metabolic, hormonal, environmental. So perhaps giving him some articles to read might help. If they don't-- his resistance is not really about that. Good luck with this and keep us posted. We are with you!

I can't speak for bypass since I had the sleeve BUT I will echo the sentiment that I would do it again in a heartbeat! Its 100% worth the hard work and pain in the end. I had my sleeve done in March and am already almost down 100 of the 150 I want to lose! It's NOT the easy way out like some people think but its so so worth it. My quality of life has improved tenfold and blood pressure is in the healthy range again! Its not a small decision by any means so just do your research and read through the forums on here- they are full of support, testimonials, and great information!! Good luck on your journey!!

I am currently losing hair. Probably not noticeable by anyone else, but it is to me. I had new low lights put in 2 weeks ago with no problems. The added darkness seems to cover a bit of the pink scalp that I notice.

I coloured my hair every four weeks over the three odd months my hair was shedding (gotta hide the greys) but my hair was not being lightened which can damage the hair strand. If it did any additional damage or prolonged the Hair loss I don’t know. I’d have an conversation with your colourist & may be just do a few strategic highlights & not a head full.

I've continued to have my hair highlights since my surgery and weight loss. I've lost a lot of hair in the past few months. My stylist actually said that the highlights coat the hair shaft and makes my hair thicker so it doesn't look so thin. Definitely didn't cause any additional Hair loss.

Hi everyone! I'm 4 months post VSG and wanting to get my hair highlighted but am currently in the dreaded Hair loss phase. Does anyone know/ have experience getting their hair highlighted while in this phase? Will it make my hair fall out faster or do more damage than usual? I know everyone is different but I wanted to see if anyone had experience with this!! Thank you!

I just wanted to say thank you to all y'all. I found this site a while ago and have been lurking and reading and learning.

The honest talk helped me with a lot of the anxiety I was having about surgery. The photos inspired me so much—so many of you changed your lives and kept them changed. The folks who are really into exercise reassured me that it isn't over (I love my CrossFit, and I can't wait until my weight isn't the limiting factor). And just the fact that so many people's lives improved finally got me over the "shame hump".

I called for a referral, had my initial consultation last week, and am tentatively scheduled for VSG in late August. (My insurance has been frankly amazing. So few roadblocks that I kept checking to make sure they were talking about bariatric surgery.) To say I can't wait for this is an understatement.

I just want y'all to know you're changing lives for me and for other lurkers who haven't clicked that "sign up" button yet. Thank you.

Agreed!!! I think a lot of folks who have struggled with coming to terms with/ accepting their sexuality have also struggled with food or body image!

Agreed!!! I think a lot of folks who have struggled with coming to terms with/ accepting their sexuality have also struggled with food or body image!

Maryuumah: PLEASE create it. It will be IMMENSELY valuable to MANY people including myself.

Thank you.

Did you make a LGBTQ community here?👀😍🥰  I would love to be part of it. My weight gain was partially due to challenges I faced in my sexual orientation journey in my early 20s for sure.

I am in support of affinity forums. Why not?! There are plenty of forums here. I personally saw the girls room and thought that was great! As a poc, I wouldn't mind exchanging thoughts with other people who might have a better understanding of what I am going through. Creating affinity groups does not erase public forums nor do they exclude others. It's just a way to hopefully ensure that the people who post in them care about that specific thing.
I will agree that sometimes, when I learn a person has a particular political view, it can be hard not to see that in everything they say. So this forum may not be the best place to discuss the happenings of the world. But that's not what an affinity group is. The girls group for example, doesn't post about unequal wages and gender discrimination. Although imo, a post about the dismissive nature of doctors towards women (Particularly women of color) and how that affects your journey could be more interesting then the standard "stalling" thread.

Your choice to support gun rights is just that. A choice. My being genderqueer and asexual is not a choice. It's who I am. And those two factors of my core being affect the way health care providers treat me and therefore my bariatric surgery journey.
That's why LGBTQIA+ is relevant here.

FWIW, I'm Bi and coming out in the 90s was a b***h. I've never examined particularly how this has affected my weight/ body issues throughout my life, but then my ACE score is pretty high. I'd be happy to have a LGBTQIA-specific forum, similar to "the Gals' room" or The Guys' room," I think it could only help more people have a place to ask questions or rant on topics particular to us. Generally this page is more of a "everyone in the same boat of WLS" place, all are welcome though. I'm sorry that this has been a chilly reception for you, I haven't found it to be so, generally. Most everyone here is pretty nice.

Because for instance, there is statistical evidence that lesbians have higher rates of obesity than straight women and more issues with other addictive behaviors, such as smoking. This may indicate a different level of support is needed and I see a lot of posts about families where people with chosen family may not feel as included. I’m not asking to start trouble, I’m asking because I am a lesbian, and would want to reach out to others who may have had issues like these. This forum is about WLS support, right?

Also, while we’re on the subject, I write healthcare grants regularly on the subject of people dealing with comorbidities/co-occurring disorders and since you brought up race and ethnicity, there are also studies that show we (people of color) have higher rates of obesity, hypertension, diabetes and other issues. Seems like a weight loss forum like this one may be a good place for people to safely discuss that part of their journey.

Part of my own work in taking the step to WLS was understanding how my genetics and family make up play a part in my weight gain. Also understanding and coming to terms with my own sexuality was part of my weight gain.

My question is, why is this threatening/upsetting (the caps) to you? I’m curious about your reaction to what seems a pretty normal question.
I’ve recently been sleeved, and am just at my 2 week mark from surgery. I’m down 21 lbs. today.