MourningTheLossOfBeer

I can see myself in alot of what you said about your husband. I also have had success in losing large amounts of weight and getting fit. I can tell you that to me and probably your husband WLS seems like a copout, or admitting to failure and that you're not as strong as you once were. I had no desire to ever have WLS , no one in my family had ever done it and it seemed like something weak people would do. On the flipside my wife's parents have had it along with another half dozen in her family. So it's pretty normal for them. My wife wanted me to go to a consultation, I didn't want to but went anyway so I could shut her up. At the consultation they told me that my insurance required 6 months of nutritional visits before the would pay for my surgery. Great I thought, I can use the 6 months to drop 100 lbs and i won't need surgery and prove to my wife that i can do it. With each month that passed, i procrastinated until I was ultimately out of months and hadn't done a damn thing. It was an eye opener for me that I needed help. Even the final 2 weeks before my surgery during my pre op diet, I had this sense of dread and wondering if I was making the right decision. I'm now 3 months post op, over 60 lbs down. I have 2 small children and I know that my actions have bought me more time with them. We now go for family walks, impromptu dance parties in the living room and lots of wrestling. As someone who was a hardcore detractor of WLS, I'm 100% on the other side of the fence. Most people say their only regret is not doing it sooner. For me fortunately my kids are young enough to where they will only remember healthy dad. Good luck. If your husband wants to talk to someone and doesn't want to do it in a public forum he can private message me. Also, for the record I opted for the sleeve. I had originally wanted the band like your husband since I considered it a temporary measure, but the more I researched it the more problems I found. Also now in retrospect it was just another aspect of me being in denial about my actual issue.

I had already met my out of pocket max due to 2 other surgeries, so they paid 100%.

Funny enough, I was with a different surgeon that my wife had found before they decided mid year that they were no longer accepting my insurance. So I decided to do my own research and came across Dr. Schillingford. Aside from the overwhelming responses of good experience with him, I noticed that alot of his patients were self pay. For me, my insurance company required the nutrition visits and psych evaluations, not the Dr. My initial consultation with him was a group consultation which he spelled out the details and what was expected and answered any questions. He did not require any particular weight loss, but did have a 2 week pre op diet, which is normal. I'm nearly 3 months out and have my 2nd follow up next week. Support groups are not required, but they are provided. Their support staff is really friendly if you call, although they don't always answer the phone so leave a message and they will usually get back to you pretty fast. I'm sure @Lolo 2020 can fill in the blanks where I didn't. As for my personal success, started 11/7/19 at 328 lbs, 268 this morning.

Another happy patient of Dr. Schillingford here. He does his surgery at Northwest Medical Center in Margate, so not too far from Miami. @iwillbethin169 I believe the 10,500 is "all in" for surgery, hospital stay and follow ups.

F the haters, plow on brother.

No pain to speak of, mostly some soreness, like doing too many situps, which was taken care of by the meds. Was in the hospital for 2 days and didn't need any pain meds once I left.

Not too far from Orlando, but I used Dr.Kahlil Schillingford based out of Boca Raton. He was excellent, no pain, easy recovery, super professional and his rates are right on his website, and reasonable. After doing research, he was one of the best in my area, I have also met a few folks after that have used him with the same experience that I had.

But seriously, I've been pretty big most of my adult life and I'm not trying to brag, but I've never had a problem dating. Personality is important, so is confidence. If you're a shy or reserved person, try working on getting out of your comfort zone and being more sociable. Weight loss will help your appearance but confidence will make you more attractive. Good luck.

Sounds like you have an opportunity to raid her closet as well. Congrats.

Not sure if you're on gallbladder meds yet, but that stuff gives me a burning sensation the doc says everyone reacts differently.

You're over 40, at your highest weight, on blood pressure and cholesterol meds. Your arrow is clearly not trending in the right direction. You obviously recognize this and want to change it. If you feel like you can control portions, count calories and dedicate yourself to the gym then go for it. But if you think surgery gives you the best chance for health then you should do it regardless of what your bf thinks, any person that cares about you should support your decision. On a personal note, I was/am in a similar situation health wise, less than 3 months post surgery I am down 60 lbs, off triglyceride meds, and diabetic meds, sleep apnea is gone. I was apprehensive before surgery, slightly concerned that I made a bad decision shortly after surgery, 3 months later, I would do it all over again, no regrets.

I haven't gone through that, but what I can tell you is that there are no roadblocks with self pay. Your insurance company may have you go through 3 to 6 months of nutritional visits first before they approve, or possibly other requirements.

I had a heart to heart with my surgeon during my last (2 month) checkup. About alcohol and soda. He said in reference to alcohol to "live your life" it won't hurt your stomach any more than someone who hasn't had surgery, but encouraged me to drink in moderation, which I do. He even went so far as to say a few glasses of wine or beer is fine. Which led me to ask about soda/beer, he said that it wouldn't stretch my stomach, but could give a false feeling of fullness and lead to me not getting in all my protein and nutrients. But as long as I'm hitting my nutrition marks then I should be fine. I've had soda a few times with no issue and despite the username, I've only had 1 beer in a social setting, I don't really want go down that path yet until I get closer to my goals, I can justify a 0 calorie soda but not a 100+ calorie beer.

Sorry that your wife isn't supportive, but there's tons of data to prove her wrong. Since you are about to be a dad, being healthy is in the best interest of your family going forward. Hope she has a change of heart.