KatFight

Cant express how much iam thankful for your encouraging words .. cant tell you how much I need them at the moment.. I really hope things get better over time @KatFight

Thank you! I appreciate it!

Sent from my SM-G955U using BariatricPal mobile app

^^ That is an awesome way to think of it. Ironically, in five months I'll be on a "family" vacation with the whole lot of them so if I continue to lose at that rate (or close) I'll be killin' it!! And...since we'll be oceanside, I'll have seafood at my disposal...no more dead potatoes for this chick!
Thanks for your reply

@jenondaway lol You got me at “murdered potato.” I know it wasn’t funny in the moment but you have a way with words. Very funny.
That is full-on pressure to go to a dinner like that in month one! And could they have made it any worse?!? Pat yourself on the back please bc you did a terrific job schmoozing and acting like it was all good, not to mention eyeballing an amazing cake and not having a morsel. No doubt had you had a pinch, laughter and pointing would ensue just like with the pizza.
Your weight loss is great. Nearly 15 lbs. in one month is remarkable. Consider by month 3 at the same rate, you’ll have nearly 45 pound off. Multiply the 3 month rate x 2 and that’s 90 lbs. in 6 months. I’ve averaged 15 pounds and I’m happy with it. Initially, I felt the way you did and then just started realizing I could never drop this amount of weight each month before surgery.
You’re coworker sounds like an ass! Of course, you are not going to be “skinny” one month post-surgery. You’ll get the last laugh in 6 months plus bc your weight loss will be REALLY noticeable and you’ll be strutting your stuff. Maybe your coworker should apply her high expectations to herself.
Strutt...👠

@MiltonP I applaud you for your courage to be vulnerable and reach out here. It’s not easy for many people to admit feelings of rage. I’m so glad you were able to get a psych appt so soon. I’m seeing my psychiatric nurse practitioner regularly right now bc I’m prone to depression and anxiety. And, it’s common to become depressed post-operatively (although not everyone does.) Over time, chronic depression is reduced as a result of WLS.
It seems to me from what you shared that you are dealing with a lot: recent surgery, not eating, some level of pain, parenting a young son, and probably even more. My husband is extremely moody when he’s hungry. The word “hangry” definitely describes him. It’s difficult to be around him when he gets like that. It’s that bad. And, you have that plus everything else to deal with.
We’re truly fortunate to have loved ones who can care for us post-surgery. If you haven’t already bc you’re still fuming, why not find a way to ease some of your tension so you can apologize to your wife? A hot shower? A walk? Some sleep? I always try to keep in mind that I’ve chosen my husband for life and, because of that, I want to behave in a way that nurtures that relationship (even in tough times) so that there are not mini-tears in it that eventually cause it to crumble. I still have very real feelings...anger, frustration, etc. but I don’t do things or say things that will erode what we have (like call him names). I’m not suggesting that you’ve don’t that, just sharing.
You’re pretty amazing and real. Please keep all of us posted on how you’re doing. Sending prayers and warm wishes your way.

@Perla It’s common for people to struggle emotionally after WLS. Although not everyone does, it’s well-documented that depression can set in following surgery. And, anxiety is a close cousin to depression. Many patients get depressed bc WLS surgery is life-changing and adaptation to this new way of life can be challenging. I agree with @Sleeve1stFitNext when she mentioned that the emotions you’re feeling may be causing physical symptoms. Anxiety, especially a panic attack, can cause breathing issues and chest pain.
Rest assured that you made the best choice possible for your health. You explained that you did a lot of research. Each step you took led you to the next step (and you were thinking through each move as you went along), eventually leading you to surgery. Second-guessing happens. No need to stay stuck in that loop though.
In time, WLS can ease depression (not that you said you’re experiencing that). I just want to mention that since I mentioned that depression can set in post-operatively. I struggle with depression and anxiety. My nurse practitioner is seeing me regularly to make sure both are addressed if they become a problem.
Be gentle with yourself. You made a very wise decision. Another wise decision is to speak with your doctor if you continue to feel this way. Two weeks of feeling this way is enough time to give your doc a call. 🌼

It is called buyers remorse. You do not have the same relationship with food as you did prior to the surgery. Right now, food is not your comfort. Therefore you are feeling down.
Have you ever heard the saying, "The body can achieve, what the mind conceives"? I ask because it seems that your anxiety with food now is affecting you physically.
My first few months out. I would be soo scared to eat anything that I would make myself sick when I ate (subconsciously). I would eat three bites and because of fear of overeating, I convinced myself that I was full. I went from having one unhealthy relationship with food (loving it) to another (hating it). I gave up one eating disorder for another. I had to change my relationship with food.
These first months will test you emotionally, physically and spiritually. They can either destroy you or make you stronger. Use this time to make a plan for yourself (goals that do not pertain to the scale).
I hope this helps. Trust in due time it will get better.

You are doing great. I’ve had many weeks of stalling then my weight drops 4 pounds in a week. I’ve had days where I’ve wondered if I’m going to be someone who doesn’t lose like everyone else either (when the stalls come). Stay the course. You’re right on track. [emoji254]

Glad you’re staying positive. As time goes on, the weight loss really adds up. Even more noticeable is how different clothes fit even with just an additional 8-10 pounds lost. I had 24w jeans I couldn’t squeeze into before surgery. I am now out of them. They were falling off. I am now wearing size 20w jeans and have room. My surgery was 12/28/17. More good things are coming your way. [emoji253]

Hi. It really depends on how you feel after surgery. My surgeon said that it’s 50/50 - those who have an easy experience and those who don’t. For me, I had an easy experience but week 3 hit me like a ton of bricks. I was beyond exhausted. You may find one week is not enough yet you are able to return before six weeks. It just depends on your outcome and how you do with diet progression.

Hi. It really depends on how you feel after surgery. My surgeon said that it’s 50/50 - those who have an easy experience and those who don’t. For me, I had an easy experience but week 3 hit me like a ton of bricks. I was beyond exhausted. You may find one week is not enough yet you are able to return before six weeks. It just depends on your outcome and how you do with diet progression.

Just the word “surgery” can cause family and friends to worry. And, it’s the unconditional love of our family which sometimes can put rose-colored glasses on when it comes to us. So rather than see your size and. The potential health risks, they look at you and see your beauty.
You see the danger in not doing something and that’s why you’ve come this far. I actually went to a WLS seminar 7ish years ago and considered the band; however, the doctor at that hospital was very arrogant. I didn’t want to go to someone with that demeanor. The next 7 years I continued to try on my own. Finally, last July I saw a surgeon at a different hospital who was great. I had surgery 12/28/17. Gastric sleeve.
After surgery I wondered why I had been nervous. My experience was easy - no sore throat, no nausea, no trouble drinking, no vomiting, and little trouble walking. I did have pain with most of it in the first two days (the gas pain is tough but not impossible). I was in and out in 22 hours with only Tylenol. I did have bruises all over my stomach and soreness. A large, rectangular medical ice pack helped a lot.
My surgeon told me that it’s 50/50 - those who it’s easier for and those it’s not. I only regret not going to this hospital 7ish years ago. Who knows? Your experience could be easier than you think I sure hope so 🌻

How fantastic! You did it and I bet it feels way better than you even imagined. You are looking so fit and healthy. [emoji79]

Hi. It really depends on how you feel after surgery. My surgeon said that it’s 50/50 - those who have an easy experience and those who don’t. For me, I had an easy experience but week 3 hit me like a ton of bricks. I was beyond exhausted. You may find one week is not enough yet you are able to return before six weeks. It just depends on your outcome and how you do with diet progression.

Just the word “surgery” can cause family and friends to worry. And, it’s the unconditional love of our family which sometimes can put rose-colored glasses on when it comes to us. So rather than see your size and. The potential health risks, they look at you and see your beauty.
You see the danger in not doing something and that’s why you’ve come this far. I actually went to a WLS seminar 7ish years ago and considered the band; however, the doctor at that hospital was very arrogant. I didn’t want to go to someone with that demeanor. The next 7 years I continued to try on my own. Finally, last July I saw a surgeon at a different hospital who was great. I had surgery 12/28/17. Gastric sleeve.
After surgery I wondered why I had been nervous. My experience was easy - no sore throat, no nausea, no trouble drinking, no vomiting, and little trouble walking. I did have pain with most of it in the first two days (the gas pain is tough but not impossible). I was in and out in 22 hours with only Tylenol. I did have bruises all over my stomach and soreness. A large, rectangular medical ice pack helped a lot.
My surgeon told me that it’s 50/50 - those who it’s easier for and those it’s not. I only regret not going to this hospital 7ish years ago. Who knows? Your experience could be easier than you think I sure hope so 🌻

Hi. You’re not alone. I also struggle with CFS/Fibromyalgia, inflammatory and osteoarthritis, and hypothyroidism too. I had a successful career and could no longer work. It was a position I really enjoyed so it was a double loss of a career and money. Like you, walking is the best I can do and sometimes I need a break for a week because my body hurts so much and I have such intense exhaustion.
VGS was my answer to get rid of some weight too bc I am unable to exercise enough to get it off. I had gained weight initially bc I was trying to get as much as rest as possible to get better, except I never got better. Emotional eating became a pattern, although I didn’t see it at the time. My surgeon is understanding and encouraged me to focus on doing as much as I can with walking on my better days and rest on the tougher days.
The third week post-op I was exhausted. The exhaustion itself caused (just like it does w/fibro) difficulty with focusing and short-term memory loss. On top of that, you are dealing with huge stressors. The stress alone could do that - add your health isssues in and there’s no wonder why you are struggling so much. There was a time years ago where my stress and exhaustion was through the roof. There was a school event where I went to talk to teachers about my son’s grades. I had recently moved and one of my new neighbors approached me and asked to be reminded of my son’s name. I needed a reminder too. I stammered trying to come up with it because my brain was exhausted. My husband finally chimed in after I looked like a fool for a minute (it felt like an eternity).
My thoughts are with you with all you’ve been through. Hoping that fond memories of your Dad will brighten your darkest days 🌸

Nubbinsd22, GassyGurl, Allie589, and New Beginnings2018 - thank you for your kind words and encouragement. It's reassuring to know this is to be expected and reminded that my body is adjusting. So glad to have this community.

Hi. WLS is a big deal so kudos to you for thinking everything through again before surgery. food changes after surgery...that’s why we do it...at the same time, as long as your surgeon is ok w it - eating some things here or there like two bites of birthday cake isn’t unheard of. My surgeon said no sweets and no alcohol.

How determined are you to stick w it? You will be the best predictor of the outcome. By following your surgeon’s guidelines, you’ll give yourself the very best opportunity for success. Will two bites of cake cause you to want more sweets more often? If it will, are you able to stop yourself from eating more? The same about wine - will you want to drink more alcohol more often? It really becomes a mental game as much as a physical one. If you don’t want to be part of the 30% that regains, you’ll need to eat only what your stomach allows in terms of portion sizes. In general, I think you may eventually be able to eat a little more than two spoonfuls but it will still be a lot less than it once was.

I had surgery just over 2 months ago. I was nervous too, especially the night before. Everything went really well for me. I’m super happy I had sleeve surgery.

I wish you all the best.

Focus all of your energy on being successful. Trust me, I've lost 225 pounds and not a damn soul has said one negative thing to me. How could they? I look fantastic, am in better health than they likely are, and am having my 20s in my 40s.
Your success will be the ultimate conversation starter. If people are snarky or rude, let than drive you to work even harder. The feeling on the other side is worth it all!
Hang in there!

Yes some programs can include limited amounts of Pasta. Mine does:) But pasta is very hard to eat post surgically and you may find it's more uncomfortable than it's worth.
If you do eat pasta again, and it's ok with your program...consider Protien Pasta. It's a special pasta made of chickpeas and lentils that gets you higher Protein and fewer carbs.
https://www.barilla.com/en-us/product-results/pasta/range/proteinplus/?sort=alpha

From the support groups I have attended, many of the participants have said that their tastes and desires in food changed radically. One guy related a really telling story. He used to love burgers and fries and now just the sight of red meat makes his stomach flip. I think rather than worry, you kind of have to ride it out and see what happens.

You will be just fine! You can eat whatever you want in moderation but be careful with Pasta & chocolates. There are many better choices to fill a half a cup every 3 hours.

One thing I’ve started to do when a guy sends me his junk... is to send one back... and be like “oh I thought we were comparing”

You know what I hate worse than d**k pix? Guys who can't communicate. If a brilliant conversationalist who makes me laugh wants to show me his parts...I might just want a peek. Yep, i'm bad.
But you've gotta pay to play that game. You need erotic writing skill. You need a mastery of language. You need the ability to completely capture my mind....before I want anything to do with your naughty bits.
And I don't just mean the ability to talk dirty. We need commonality, similar values, similar politics, similar creativity and twisted humor, compassion, intelligence, emotional intelligence.
Yep, I've got a LOT of tough criteria. But if the guy fits THAT bill? They can send me all the skin shots they want. But not one minute before.
If a boring guy sends me a shot of his junk, I use paint to make a weird cartoon out of it and send it back. Then, I delete them. That kinda stuff should never be a surprise.

About the jail thing.....people misrepresent themselves online all the time. There are fake pictures of underage people that get circulated instead of the 'real person' and once your info is out there you can get pictures on your phone and computer that are compromising and not solicited because you already made contact and accepted. Plus viruses that put backdoors to your info that you will not even know are there.
Naked pictures are porn and online is not private. What you do offline is one thing, what you do online is a whole different ballgame people.