Kat410

This makes me sorta mad and it’s not even happening to me. I think it’s just embedded in our culture that the female body is there to be managed, controlled, commented on and otherwise handled.

The other day One led the commentators came back to me and asked if it was inappropriate that he said something (as I was walking past him in a busy office he literally said “How much weight have you lost???” No greeting - just that.)

I told him that I recommend that he never comment on someone’s body ever. And if he has a relationship with that person he should ask for permission to ask about it. People lose and gain weight for all sorts of reasons and we can never assume that we know what people are dealing with.

When my aunt was initially diagnosed with pancreatic cancer people started praising her for her weight loss at first - she lived for a year.

This makes me sorta mad and it’s not even happening to me. I think it’s just embedded in our culture that the female body is there to be managed, controlled, commented on and otherwise handled.

The other day One led the commentators came back to me and asked if it was inappropriate that he said something (as I was walking past him in a busy office he literally said “How much weight have you lost???” No greeting - just that.)

I told him that I recommend that he never comment on someone’s body ever. And if he has a relationship with that person he should ask for permission to ask about it. People lose and gain weight for all sorts of reasons and we can never assume that we know what people are dealing with.

When my aunt was initially diagnosed with pancreatic cancer people started praising her for her weight loss at first - she lived for a year.

This makes me sorta mad and it’s not even happening to me. I think it’s just embedded in our culture that the female body is there to be managed, controlled, commented on and otherwise handled.

The other day One led the commentators came back to me and asked if it was inappropriate that he said something (as I was walking past him in a busy office he literally said “How much weight have you lost???” No greeting - just that.)

I told him that I recommend that he never comment on someone’s body ever. And if he has a relationship with that person he should ask for permission to ask about it. People lose and gain weight for all sorts of reasons and we can never assume that we know what people are dealing with.

When my aunt was initially diagnosed with pancreatic cancer people started praising her for her weight loss at first - she lived for a year.

I was open about my surgery with people I spent a lot of time with - including co-workers.
I was very straight about what would and would not work for me.
My staff members are no longer allowed to bring food into my office for meetings. I am also more sensitive to smells, so that means no coffee (I have a coffee aversion).
I can now handle being around any food, but it was not like that for a period of months. I told people what would work and what didn't work.
You should talk to your friend. There is nothing wrong with being straight and telling people what you need and what is OK or not OK in your own dang house.
In the long run, I think it's more undermining to have resentments and be upset about things and NOT discuss it than it is to be straight and work things out.
You are in the toughest part right now. The second toughest part will be right after surgery. You are doing great. And venting is useful.
YOU GOT THIS

Is it just me - or does anyone get annoyed by the NEVER ENDING STREAM OF COMMENTS about your body???
I work in an environment where I interact with hundreds of people every day, and while the comments are "nice", I am unbelievably sick of people thinking they have the right to comment on my body, how I look, their assumptions about how hard it's been, what this means, how they think I feel, what they think this means to me, what they think I have had to deal with, their opinions about it, etc.
I mean.... it is NON STOP. People literally say things like "You must feel so much better!" (I didn't feel bad before). "This must have been so difficult!" (no, it really wasn't because I was mentally read). "You look so much younger!" (I didn't realize I looked old before). "How much weight have you lost?" (I have lost none of your business pounds).
Am I nuts to get so annoyed about this?

Is it just me - or does anyone get annoyed by the NEVER ENDING STREAM OF COMMENTS about your body???
I work in an environment where I interact with hundreds of people every day, and while the comments are "nice", I am unbelievably sick of people thinking they have the right to comment on my body, how I look, their assumptions about how hard it's been, what this means, how they think I feel, what they think this means to me, what they think I have had to deal with, their opinions about it, etc.
I mean.... it is NON STOP. People literally say things like "You must feel so much better!" (I didn't feel bad before). "This must have been so difficult!" (no, it really wasn't because I was mentally read). "You look so much younger!" (I didn't realize I looked old before). "How much weight have you lost?" (I have lost none of your business pounds).
Am I nuts to get so annoyed about this?

Is it just me - or does anyone get annoyed by the NEVER ENDING STREAM OF COMMENTS about your body???
I work in an environment where I interact with hundreds of people every day, and while the comments are "nice", I am unbelievably sick of people thinking they have the right to comment on my body, how I look, their assumptions about how hard it's been, what this means, how they think I feel, what they think this means to me, what they think I have had to deal with, their opinions about it, etc.
I mean.... it is NON STOP. People literally say things like "You must feel so much better!" (I didn't feel bad before). "This must have been so difficult!" (no, it really wasn't because I was mentally read). "You look so much younger!" (I didn't realize I looked old before). "How much weight have you lost?" (I have lost none of your business pounds).
Am I nuts to get so annoyed about this?

98 Pounds down!
65% of excess body weight gone
Lifting weights, HIT and yoga
More energy, vitality and aliveness!

I was open about my surgery with people I spent a lot of time with - including co-workers.
I was very straight about what would and would not work for me.
My staff members are no longer allowed to bring food into my office for meetings. I am also more sensitive to smells, so that means no coffee (I have a coffee aversion).
I can now handle being around any food, but it was not like that for a period of months. I told people what would work and what didn't work.
You should talk to your friend. There is nothing wrong with being straight and telling people what you need and what is OK or not OK in your own dang house.
In the long run, I think it's more undermining to have resentments and be upset about things and NOT discuss it than it is to be straight and work things out.
You are in the toughest part right now. The second toughest part will be right after surgery. You are doing great. And venting is useful.
YOU GOT THIS

Is it just me - or does anyone get annoyed by the NEVER ENDING STREAM OF COMMENTS about your body???
I work in an environment where I interact with hundreds of people every day, and while the comments are "nice", I am unbelievably sick of people thinking they have the right to comment on my body, how I look, their assumptions about how hard it's been, what this means, how they think I feel, what they think this means to me, what they think I have had to deal with, their opinions about it, etc.
I mean.... it is NON STOP. People literally say things like "You must feel so much better!" (I didn't feel bad before). "This must have been so difficult!" (no, it really wasn't because I was mentally read). "You look so much younger!" (I didn't realize I looked old before). "How much weight have you lost?" (I have lost none of your business pounds).
Am I nuts to get so annoyed about this?

98 Pounds down!
65% of excess body weight gone
Lifting weights, HIT and yoga
More energy, vitality and aliveness!

Hello all. I am three months in since my gastric sleeve surgery the end of July 2017 here in British Columbia. Started at 300 pounds before I began the pre-op program a year ago. Lost 60 before surgery and am down to 207 pounds as of today. Looking at some posts by others I think I am VERY lucky in how things have gone. The only two problems I have ongoing are heartburn and Constipation that I need to really work at to keep things "moving along". As a reward to myself I treated myself to a week long cruise that I returned from two days ago. Now many folk may say that was asking for trouble with all the "free food" on a cruise but I actually found myself very disciplined and actually lost 2 pounds over the past week. Thought I would just pass along some of the observations that I have had since this journey began -- some expected; some not; some big; some little. In no particular order........
At home I now fit in my bathtub :-) Much nicer to relax and have a soak after a long day, easier to get in and out too. My walking gets better and better every day and even on our "sea days" on the ship I managed to get in 12,000 plus steps per day (it was a big ship). One one tour day off the ship I walked just under 20,000 steps ....... I would have NEVER been able to do that a year ago-- I also have a foot injury that requires I use a cane. When I tell folk I am on a 'restricted diet' they sometimes comment that I look good and don't need to diet......oh if they only knew! Folk that haven't seen me in a while are quite startled; some even don't recognize me. A friend's husband picked me up at the airport when I returned from my trip and I had to stand right in front of him before he recognized me. My own brother was at the cashier next to me in our local grocery store and only recognized me when I spoke to the cashier. I fit (comfortably) in my airplane seat. No more "seat belt extender". This was so wonderful, when I clicked that seat belt on the plane the other day I could have wept with joy. I am going to have to splurge on new underwear. My granny panties have been the last of my big clothes that will need to be replaced. I could keep wearing them as no one saw them but right now the only thing holding them up is my slacks over top. Speaking of clothes I have gone from a size 26 to an 18 and even they are getting big. A few friends have recommended I shop at some of the second hand stores but I feel a need to treat myself to "new", even if it means buying from the cheaper outlets (like anything is really cheap) and if I then pass along some fairly new clothes after a few months it is all worth it, I felt comfortable enough to attend the "formal night" on the cruise ship where I dressed up a bit (well a bit for me anyway) and even had a portrait taken after dinner. I mean who can turn down lobster - even if I only at a bit of it. Most folk are very supportive when I do tell them of this year long journey and most have friends and family who have done it as well. Always interesting to hear their stories. On the down side I am still uncomfortable around "food-centric" events. We celebrated Canadian Thanksgiving earlier this month and I turned down the invitation to a big family dinner. I knew that there would be eating and drinking starting from the afternoon into the evening and I just din't want to have to face that amount of food and comments from friends and family. I have to work on this I know as can't stay away for ever. Just some observations I have seen over the past few months. Anyone else got any they have experienced I can look forward to??
Thanks for listening
Lesley Q

Why would you decide something before you have even tried?
This journey is probably more mental than physical.
Do you think I wanted to tell my trainer that I weighed 280 and had just lost 55 lbs as a result of a bariatric surgery??? No, of course I didn't. What I wanted MORE than avoiding my discomfort was the benefit of being fit.
You are not going to get the results you want without confronting what your choices cost you. OK, fine - avoid the discomfort of potentially being judged (which may actually be unlikely). But at what price? You are not getting trained and you are left with it's more important not to deal with the discomfort of people assessing you.

There is really no way to predict and it's important that you are managing your expectations appropriately.
Some posters here have theorized that your pre-op weight loss will be predictive of your post-op weight loss.
There are also other factors - starting BMI, age, gender, height, genetics, etc.
For myself, in the past I had been able to successfully lose weight many times and at a fairly quick pace, but was unsuccessful at managing my diet for the length of time required given how much weight I needed to lose.
Here's what happened for me:
10 day pre-op diet - 16 lbs lost
1st Month - 29 lbs lost
2nd Month - 12.6 lbs lost
3rd Month - 10.4 lbs lost
4th Month - 12.8 lbs lost
5th Month - 13.4 lbs lost
I have lost 55% of my excess weight. The AVERAGE weight loss for gastric sleeve is 60% - but that's an average with what is actually happening on both sides of the bell curve.
There will be some factors beyond your control - age, height, gender and genetics.
There will be some factors completely in your control - diet adherence, portion control/calorie management, exercise/activity, etc.
Good luck and best wishes!

There is really no way to predict and it's important that you are managing your expectations appropriately.
Some posters here have theorized that your pre-op weight loss will be predictive of your post-op weight loss.
There are also other factors - starting BMI, age, gender, height, genetics, etc.
For myself, in the past I had been able to successfully lose weight many times and at a fairly quick pace, but was unsuccessful at managing my diet for the length of time required given how much weight I needed to lose.
Here's what happened for me:
10 day pre-op diet - 16 lbs lost
1st Month - 29 lbs lost
2nd Month - 12.6 lbs lost
3rd Month - 10.4 lbs lost
4th Month - 12.8 lbs lost
5th Month - 13.4 lbs lost
I have lost 55% of my excess weight. The AVERAGE weight loss for gastric sleeve is 60% - but that's an average with what is actually happening on both sides of the bell curve.
There will be some factors beyond your control - age, height, gender and genetics.
There will be some factors completely in your control - diet adherence, portion control/calorie management, exercise/activity, etc.
Good luck and best wishes!

There is really no way to predict and it's important that you are managing your expectations appropriately.
Some posters here have theorized that your pre-op weight loss will be predictive of your post-op weight loss.
There are also other factors - starting BMI, age, gender, height, genetics, etc.
For myself, in the past I had been able to successfully lose weight many times and at a fairly quick pace, but was unsuccessful at managing my diet for the length of time required given how much weight I needed to lose.
Here's what happened for me:
10 day pre-op diet - 16 lbs lost
1st Month - 29 lbs lost
2nd Month - 12.6 lbs lost
3rd Month - 10.4 lbs lost
4th Month - 12.8 lbs lost
5th Month - 13.4 lbs lost
I have lost 55% of my excess weight. The AVERAGE weight loss for gastric sleeve is 60% - but that's an average with what is actually happening on both sides of the bell curve.
There will be some factors beyond your control - age, height, gender and genetics.
There will be some factors completely in your control - diet adherence, portion control/calorie management, exercise/activity, etc.
Good luck and best wishes!

There is really no way to predict and it's important that you are managing your expectations appropriately.
Some posters here have theorized that your pre-op weight loss will be predictive of your post-op weight loss.
There are also other factors - starting BMI, age, gender, height, genetics, etc.
For myself, in the past I had been able to successfully lose weight many times and at a fairly quick pace, but was unsuccessful at managing my diet for the length of time required given how much weight I needed to lose.
Here's what happened for me:
10 day pre-op diet - 16 lbs lost
1st Month - 29 lbs lost
2nd Month - 12.6 lbs lost
3rd Month - 10.4 lbs lost
4th Month - 12.8 lbs lost
5th Month - 13.4 lbs lost
I have lost 55% of my excess weight. The AVERAGE weight loss for gastric sleeve is 60% - but that's an average with what is actually happening on both sides of the bell curve.
There will be some factors beyond your control - age, height, gender and genetics.
There will be some factors completely in your control - diet adherence, portion control/calorie management, exercise/activity, etc.
Good luck and best wishes!

all I can say is My Spiritual Healer is Great and I'm thankful for my tool .I did the work my tool just helps me and remind me to be f**king great ! Kayla
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Thanks everyone! I hit 120lbs lost last week. Just 25lbs more to go. I think I want to get down to 145 now that it seems possible. Current weight: 170lbs

Wow, thanks everyone! Not at goal yet, but on my way. Here's my most recent photo at 113lbs lost. I have 30 more pounds to lose to reach my goal, and just 20 to reach my surgeon's goal.

There is no proven way to prevent it.
So far my most effective remedy was an ultra-short cut.
I still kept loosing hair, but it was not as noticeable and easier to manage.
It turns out the short cut is very flattering on my thinner face and body.
It started coming out at 3 months post-surgery, then I shed more than a German Shepherd in my 4th month. I am now approaching 6 months out and it seems to have slowed down a bit.

@CowgirlJane - I tried OH as well, but that platform is just awful. Very difficult to navigate and then Guy's section was literally a weekly weigh in. This place of course has a more traditional forum layout.
It seems like the majority of vets that have stuck around or pop in from time to time are either not active, failing or struggling and trying to get back on track, or batshit crazy and looking for attention. Me personally I am a creature of habit and check all my forums in the morning. This place is like that car accident in the lane next to you. You can't help but look.

I definitely stocked up on my kitchen appliances and equipment - not so much due to being post-op, but mostly because I was going to meal-prep versus eating out and doing take-out.
The two things that made the biggest difference were small (2 oz) size tupperware containers and a Nutribullet. I do have a BlendTec blender which is great for Soups, sauces, smoothies - but it is easier to deal with a Nutribullet for Protein Shakes and other single serving items.
After my liquid phase I got a food scale, a mini food processor and a good knife sharpener given I was doing a lot more prep. I already had a cold-press juicer, crock pot and a good blender. This has worked well for me.
I am using my crock pot a lot to make stews and braised meats which I then freeze. My favorite is a white bean and sausage stew that is very heavy on the garlic, rosemary and thyme - very savory and a 2 oz serving is unbelievably filling.
For food items you wont need much. Protein shakes, sugar free Jello, and Bone Broth was pretty much all I ate for the first couple of weeks.
It's when you start introducing foods that you deal with prep and getting organized.

@Berry78, @Apple1, @Lovergurl and @Kat410,
Thank you all for your responses and feedback on your successes in MX. I have considered it because I know others have had good results, but it was kind of a last resort idea for me - for one because I have a lot of back issues/chronic pain and don't know how well I would do on the flight there. To be honest, Florida is pushing it between the airport and the flight, but I was also supposed to be doing an intrathecal pain pump trial soon and thought that might help me survive the flight if I end up having it implanted. Now my pain doc isn't getting back to me to schedule that (really not my month for success w/drs I guess).
I finally decided today to say scr^w the consequences and book w/my local hospital to have access to the support group and follow up care. Turns out the woman I've been assigned to recently fractured her foot, and then had a death in the family. So that is partial cause for no return calls. They let me schedule a nurse phone health history next Friday 10/27, then a surgical consult with an internist there on the 31st, but said they can't schedule my nut appts til after that and she has no openings til Dec as of now.
They are still making me do 3 nut visits, even though self pay, prob a month apart, and even though my ins is supposed to cover that they said they checked and they don't and cash price is $800 for 3 visits!! Also, since so many ppl need appts, they are thinking of doing "group nutrition" classes, so if they do, maybe I can come in sooner than Dec - maybe. I'm thinking - why would I pay $800 for 3 nut visits to begin with, much less 3 Group nut visits? It just seems like a lot of money to me, and on top of the self pay price.
She also said "Kay", who is "my person" there, will be in a couple days next week, and she needs to check with the hospital about pricing because they don't know how much anesthesia fees are or the hospital fee - But all 3 fees are broken down in the info packet I got from Kay at the seminar! Surgeon/Anesthesiologist/Hospital. And, she said they are going to set everything up and bill to my ins co anyway, as if they were going to pay, even though we know they won't because it's flat out excluded. I have no idea why. One of the only perks of being self pay is supposed to be a few less hoops to jump through. Now I feel as though they are purposely creating more or acting unsure of pricing all of a sudden!
Maybe they don't want my money?? Honestly, maybe they just don't get that many self pay patients and they don't want to deal with the hassle so they are trying to wear me down. Well it's working, because I feel like just giving the loan back and calling it a day. As a long time chronic pain patient I am used to having to constantly advocate for myself, but sometimes it just gets to be too much. I'm sorry to include you in my pity party - I know it is pathetic. I didn't even question anything she said on the phone because my mind was spinning thinking, "This doesn't make any sense!" Now I'm thinking of everything I should have been saying, of course!
I don't know, I guess I'm going to sleep on it. I will probably look into Mexico more - maybe I will end up going there...But I can't see any of my current doctors being helpful with that. They will probably say I'm making a mistake, so getting help from them may be hard. Thanks so much for listening though. I just don't know who else to talk to. No one in my circle really needs to lose weight, much less go to this extreme. They just won't get it. It's a really lonely place to be sometimes...

My op is not for 2 months, but I want to start setting up a practical joke on everyone I know.
If you have any ideas, please post them.
My main Target is my ultrafitness-centered brother who measures his bmi and fat content to at least 0.1%, and my fitness oriented brother and my personal trainer sister in law.
Only people that know about my surgery are my parents. And they will be in on the joke.
My mother will call my brothers with great concern about my weight loss and obsession with medicine balls. She will be concern that I have been unhealthy, possibly bolemia, and suffering from OCD and my medicine ball use is worse than the local teenagers and their skateboard ramps.
They'll come and visit me, and I'll always have a medicine ball, and just play it up. They also see me with a medicine ball when I visit them for Christmas. Anything to perplex them over weight loss. Brother is a graphic design artist, and I might ask him to design a book cover for a self published book "Medicine Ball Miracle". And just see how far I can go with them and everyone else.
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