criolelaie

Well you are going to feel full on less food so your reserves should last longer
Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

Well you are going to feel full on less food so your reserves should last longer
Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

I'm bearing my soul and body here. I couldn't be more proud of how my body has changed.
I've lost exactly 70 pounds since my surgery. Today marks exactly 24 weeks ( 6 months ) since my VSG surgery.
There's good, bad and ugly about VSG. A lot of days, I cried and wondered why in the hell I had this surgery, and what in the hell ive done to myself. Throughout this process, I haven't been able to REALLY see the changes. In my mind, I always see a 268 pound fat girl. Granted, I have seen the changes, seen the smaller clothes sizes, but still struggled with my self image in my head. But today that all changed....
I realized today as I was getting dressed that I had on the same exact underwear as the day I took my pre-surgery pictures. Then I realized that today marked 6 months since surgery. So, i decided to take pictures.
I haven't taken pictures in this process because of the absolute shame and disgust I feel towards myself. Shame and disgust are understatement words for how I feel about myself. Until today...
Today, I feel proud. For the first time, I can honestly say that I don't see "that fat girl" in the mirror anymore. It may not be pretty, it will never be perfect, but it's mine, and today I'm owning it, and FINALLY for once in my LIFE, I'm feeling proud.
It's NOT an easy decision to post these photos of me in my underwear. I feel absolutely vulnerable and exposed. Please be kind. It took all the courage I could muster to do this. The current pictures are not the best quality but the best I could take of myself at the moment.
All you new VSG-ers, stay the course and have faith. If you have body image issues as I do, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and you are not alone in the dark!
Much love from me to you all! ️️️
 
DOS: 12/13/16
HW: 268
SW: 256.6
CW: 186.4

SW 307.6 SW 291.4 CW 169.4 GW 150
Hi Everyone! I had Gastric Bypass done September 21,2016 and it was the best choice I have ever made! This Journey to a new me has been amazing and I love the look of shock on peoples faces when they see Ive lost 138 in 7 months! I work out hard kickboxing 3 days a week and cardio in the gym another 1 to 2 days a week it takes alot of hard work but if you want it bad enough tou have to fight for it! Best of Luck to everyone out there!
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Hey!
So I've left dieting behind. I no longer weigh myself. I don't count my calories or macros or Protein grams. I have no idea what I eat in a day, it's always different and I actually forget.
I exercise for fun and enjoyment but not for weight regulation. If I don't feel like working out, I don't.
Bariatric surgery helped me lose 100 lbs but it also caused a great deal of pain in my life. I struggle to this day with food getting stuck, vomiting, and dumping.
I have rejected dieting because after my weight loss I realized I was just as miserable and unhappy as prior to my weight loss. Living a life centered around food, dieting, weight and body imagine was taking all the joy out of my world. I didn't feel at ease- I felt the same amount of stress and anxiety around food as before weight loss- maybe more So now that I was thin and felt I had more to lose if I regained. Basically I was still stuck in an eating disorder and diet mindset and it was ruining my life.
I now eat by INTUITIVE EATING. It is a book I read and a way of eating that was presented to me when I went through eating disorder therapy. I eat by my hunger.. if I'm hungry I eat and if I'm not, I don't. Well.. sometimes I still do. Basically these days I just don't think about it that much. I just eat.
I can eat normal to large portion sizes now. I eat a wide variety of foods including sweets and fried food. I don't love processed Snacks but sometimes I still eat those too. I'd say I eat a fairly healthy diet nutrition wise- I eat my fair share of veggies and fruit but I definitely don't ponder about it- I just eat what appeals to me. I like salads as much as I like cake and protein.
I initially gained about 10lbs, but I was underweight at a BMI of 17. My weight has remained stable for about a year now, as far as I know.
If anyone wants to know more feel free to get in touch. I'm happy to talk about my experiences.
 

Here's a side by side of pre-op vs 4 days post-op. Can't wait to see how they look once the swelling goes down.

Down a total of 190 pounds, sometimes I still can't believe it!

Yesterday was my last skin removal procedure… vertical inner thigh lift. I'm pretty swollen, but that's pretty standard after surgery. He removed 2.6lbs of skin & decided to do some Lipo (that was an added bonus!) & removed 1600ml of fat. They put me in my compression garment while I was still in the OR, so I have no idea how I look! I get to shower tomorrow, so that'll be my first look at the new me.
Just some history:
5'4"
HW 292.6
SW (VSG) 268
GW 175
CW 148 (pre-thigh lift)
Fleur de lis TT/LBL 2/23/17
Breast lift (no implant) 4/18/17
Inner thigh lift 5/16/17
I'll probably get on the scale tomorrow, and I expect it'll be back in the 150s because of all of the swelling… but it'll come back down soon enough. Can't wait to see where I land!

Today I had an "ah-ha" moment. It took 4 years, but I think I get it! It was triggered by this before photo popping up in my Facebook memories from 5 years ago, (coupled with my most recent post-op photo taken last week, down 120 pounds since surgery in 2013). (attached below)
....And then reading the following quote on a friend's post:
"Maybe the journey isn't so much about becoming anything. Maybe it's about unbecoming everything that isn't you so you can be who you were in the first place."
I've struggled for years since losing the weight after surgery with questions of "is this the 'real' me, or am I just pretending and the 'real' 'fat' me will resurface sooner or later?" "Can people really change long-term?" It felt like the obese, sad, self-hating "me" was a monster waiting just below the surface to re-emerge. Give enough time and the right circumstances, the "real me" monster will rear it's head and I'll find myself back at nearly 300 pounds.
Guys! I get it now! It's not about change. It's not about the "sticking power" of change. It's not about willpower or determination. It's not even about counting carbs, Protein, calories, and ounces of Water. Sure those are tools that help. But it's not about that.
It's about doing the hard emotional work to figure out why I was hiding myself behind 150 excess pounds. It was about allowing myself to have a voice and using it. It was about demanding self-respect and respect from others. It was about leaving behind, painfully as it was in some cases, the toxic people in my life who emotionally damaged me. It was about processing the feelings that I didn't allow myself to feel for 18 years.
Once I realized this, once I did this work, I could little by little shed the layers that hid who I was. I don't hate myself anymore. I'm not even angry at myself for letting myself get to be 300 pounds like I was when my journey started. I realize now that I was coping. I was doing the best I knew how to do at the time. I look at that person in the "before" picture below and I feel compassion because I know she did her best.
I'm able now to let go the "fear" - and trust me, it's a literal fear - of that "real me" monster re-emerging from just below the surface. I can let it go because I realize, this is the real me. It was actually opposite. It was all the hiding I was doing under the emotional eating and the 150 excess pounds that was hiding the "real me."
So I have to on some level disagree with those who say this is a process of change. Sure, you have to change your behavioral choices with food and exercise or none of this will work. But for me it was not "becoming a new person" or "changing" who I am as a person. For me it was about simply allowing myself to feel and allowing myself to return home to who I was before I was hurt and who the universe intends me to be.
Feel free to check out my blog linked in my signature for more of my journey!

At the very beginning I was weighing every few days. I currently weigh weekly but my weight loss has slowed down so I am moving to once a fortnight. Also I think it is important to consider other factors other than weight only, for instance my scale also measure fat and muscle % and I have purchase a special pair of leggings to measure waist and hips

At the very beginning I was weighing every few days. I currently weigh weekly but my weight loss has slowed down so I am moving to once a fortnight. Also I think it is important to consider other factors other than weight only, for instance my scale also measure fat and muscle % and I have purchase a special pair of leggings to measure waist and hips

I definitely did this partly for vanity. I'm 30 and single. The main reason to do this surgery was to save my life because I was killing my self at 540 pounds. But a part of the reason I did this was to look hot. To shove it in the face of every person and guy who judged me first for my appearance and personality last. The ones who said I had a great personality but they weren't attracted to me...I want to get to a healthy weight and shove it in their face that I can be hot and I'm not interested in them because I can change my weight but they can't change their attitudes or poor personality.
It's already started and I haven't even hit goal yet.

At the very beginning I was weighing every few days. I currently weigh weekly but my weight loss has slowed down so I am moving to once a fortnight. Also I think it is important to consider other factors other than weight only, for instance my scale also measure fat and muscle % and I have purchase a special pair of leggings to measure waist and hips

Posting here too, because I am SO EXCITED!!
my six months post op shot. The first is from about a year ago, at my heaviest; the second is about a month post op; the third is today!!

Before, approx 210

Now, 153

Cycling between losing pounds and losing inches..

Just completed my first full marathon (LA Marathon) a few weeks ago this surgery was a life saver

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Almost 100 pounds down

Sorry here's my before and another pre-op. Newbie trying to figure this out lol




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Surgery 4/19/17 hw 505 Sw 434 Cw 421 down i4lbs total

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At the very beginning I was weighing every few days. I currently weigh weekly but my weight loss has slowed down so I am moving to once a fortnight. Also I think it is important to consider other factors other than weight only, for instance my scale also measure fat and muscle % and I have purchase a special pair of leggings to measure waist and hips

At the very beginning I was weighing every few days. I currently weigh weekly but my weight loss has slowed down so I am moving to once a fortnight. Also I think it is important to consider other factors other than weight only, for instance my scale also measure fat and muscle % and I have purchase a special pair of leggings to measure waist and hips

So I am just about a year out since my surgery. Had it on May 23rd of 2016.     
Far and away I can say this was the BEST decision that I have ever made in my life. My highest weight was 433 lbs with my surgery weight at 397 lbs. Proud to say just about a year after surgery I currently weigh 194 pounds. 203 pounds down since the surgery and 241 down overall.
I literally cannot even tell you how much this has changed my life for the better. I am posting this because I want everyone to know that if I did it you can too. If anyone has literally any questions at all for me please don't hesitate to reach out. I  

Hi Criolelaie! Thank you, it's good to know you are not alone on an island!!! You are so right, slow loss is better than no loss, I just have to keep telling myself that. I've started swimming to help with exercise so hopefully that will start some more loss. Thanks again and keep up the great work! [emoji4]

Hi Jackie my weight loss is slowing down too, in the last month I only lost 5 pounds. I can eat more now and I regularly hit 1200 calories per day and often more. Don't give up! Slow loss is still loss I am starting exercising more to make up for the increased calories intake.