2ndSpring

Waiting for approval was really hard for me mentally, so I know how you feel. Once you make a decision and are ready to move forward, it is frustrating to have to wait on someone else. Maybe think of it this way, you are already on the journey. Its just that the surgery may happen at a different point on the journey than you originally planned.
Good luck and I hope it all comes together soon.

The scale goes up and down like it's possessed. Ignore it, like you would ignore a crazy person on the subway. haha, just avert your eyes and pretend its not there.

Oh, you mean like the Republicans that rallied around Obama? #notmypresident

The scale goes up and down like it's possessed. Ignore it, like you would ignore a crazy person on the subway. haha, just avert your eyes and pretend its not there.

@ShelterDog64 - thank you! I missed the original "carp" thread and had seen it mentioned a few times in other threads, so I was wondering what went on. I searched for carp and then also found the "sweetest fish" thread too. Soo funny. It takes all kinds.

My sentiments exactly.

Courtesy of Disney.

I found that my body got used to the liquid diet after the first week and then it wasn't as bad. I drank my shakes at the same time every day and it became a routine.
I promise it is much better after surgery. Your appetite will be right in line with your ability to eat.
Good luck!

Here's my take on it, and as with anything else online, take what works for you and leave the rest.

And this is my 3rd attempt, my computer apparently doesn't want me commenting. LOL.

When I rant, I try to keep it focused on my issues. "I get frustrated by ..." rather than saying "so-and-so is an idiot". I have honestly seen very little in the way of true personal attacks on this board, for which I am grateful.

Here's the issues as I see them.

1. People who want validation for their choices. Frankly, we're all adults here, and I don't get the need for validation or some kind of forgiveness or absolution. I don't feel a need to shame them for their choice, and I don't agree that shaming them is a good response. (Of course, I've seen very little of that.) However, if the people who post "my doctor didn't tell me anything about a post-op diet" actually did not get good information about how to eat post-op, they need to have an opportunity to get better information than nothing. For this to be successful, we cannot continue eating and making choices about eating the way we always have. Saying "from my perspective that wasn't a good choice" is not the same as shaming them. To me, this is a little like AA. You don't see people coming to AA and saying "hey, I had a beer yesterday" and having people respond "that's OK sweetie, we're all human". No. The response is "we're all human, and we make mistakes, but you get that it was a mistake right?" That's not shaming, it's being honest about how their choice fits in.

Note about #1. I don't do low-carb. If I came on the board and posted about eating bread, and had 15 vets go "hon, bread is the devil, you won't be successful that way" I wouldn't feel that they were shaming me or telling me how to eat. That is their experience, and they are the ones who have lived this a heck of a lot longer than I have. They don't know that my eating plan is approved by my doc, all they know is their instructions, and their experience. It would be crappy of me to then start blasting them for sharing what they know in an attempt to help me. And I don't know what I don't know... not restricting carbs may bite me in my ample butt. I may not make goal or be able to maintain because of it. I'll let you know how it goes in another 10 months or so. In the meantime, I don't go around the board slamming vets for preaching low-carb, or trying to preach a non-low-carb diet. I sometimes will point out that not all of us have that option, or we have a different plan from our docs, but I don't get testy about it.

2. People who are reading this board and either don't have a strong surgical team to support them, and read all the coddling posts saying "that's OK, we're all human" or "I did that too, and I'm fine so don't worry" ESPECIALLY WHEN they're talking about early post-op periods. Those of us who are medical professionals or have extensive experience (vets) may feel a responsibility to them to make sure the only voices out there are not the ones saying "don't worry" when there's PLENTY of cause to worry.

As an aside: I'm coming to hate the term "cheating" like LipstickLady. When you're talking about a post-operative (especially for a major stomach surgery) diet progression, it's not "cheating" on a diet. It's violating your post-surgical instructions from your surgical team, and it CAN BE DEADLY. It won't be in the majority of cases, but we have no way to know when it will land someone in the ICU or the morgue, or when it won't. You can choose to deviate from your instructions, you're an adult. But by gosh, I'm not going to let you tell someone else that they shouldn't worry without at least voicing the very real potential for disaster.

3. The rants about it come from the way the vets and those who are trying to be a voice of reason are slammed and attacked for doing so. I have seen vets called mean or judgmental when I read nothing mean or judgmental in their tone, their only crime was refusing to become an echo chamber for the "it's OK sweetie, we're all human, don't worry about it" nonsense.

As a nurse, I'm frankly scared for the people who don't seem to take this surgery as seriously as they need to. That's what I'm hearing from people who start rants like this, as well. We don't want people to fail. We want everyone on this board to succeed. Even if you are a person I just can't stand, I still want you to succeed. Coddling bad choices and normalizing them is NOT the way to help those who are serious about this succeed.

(stepping off the soapbox)

@ShelterDog64 - thank you! I missed the original "carp" thread and had seen it mentioned a few times in other threads, so I was wondering what went on. I searched for carp and then also found the "sweetest fish" thread too. Soo funny. It takes all kinds.

30 days is the norm for a foreseeable fmla covered absence. fmla does not require you to divulge your diagnosis. Here is a link to a fact sheet from US dept of labor on notice requirements. I hope the mods don't mind the link. https://www.dol.gov/whd/regs/compliance/whdfs28e.pdf

My overweight husband said this... "So when you lose all of the weight I'll have a smoking hot wife, maybe then you'll feel like getting intimate more often." My response, "Maybe, I've had my eye on a couple of guys, I'm just waiting for the right moment." LOL He really needs to step up his game and give me something smoking too!!

and why is everything so sweet? I don't need everything to taste like candy. I won't go off on a tirade/rant about food companies getting rich while marketing garbage as healthy food (...my family laughs about how fast I can go from 0 to 60 on this topic!).

thanks for the replies.
Bufflehead: That was a great analogy! You are absolutely right and I'm thinking of this the wrong way. I just really want to make sure I'm putting this time to good use. I totally understood the "fat brain". I agree with you that our reptilian brains want us to stay fat. Haha, we would have been great cavepeople...sole survivors after a long winter famine.
Antichick: thanks for the advice, maybe I'll make an appointment with the psychologist at my surgeon's office.

I'm semi-vegetarian, pescetarian - I eat fish and eggs but no meat. I have to stay away from dairy too because I'm lactose intolerant. I'm a week away from transitioning to whole foods and still on soft food but here are some meal ideas.
At each meal I have one of 3 proteins: eggs, Beans or fish.
- last night I adapted a recipe for lentil meatballs, haven't tried them yet, but they look good. Google NYT veggie balls. I omitted the parm and used chickpea flour instead of breadcrumbs, and almond meal instead of walnuts. (I made them soft by then leaving overnight in Tomato sauce.)
- omelette with 1 oz of sauteed veggies - premake the veggies for the week - like a batch of sauteed mushrooms, onions and spinach
- chickpea flat bread - made with chickpea flour which is 100% Beans, no grain. I make it thicker and cook it less than recipe so it stays soft - google chickpea bread and a ton of recipes will pop up. then I eat it with a side of veggies
- poached fish in coconut curry sauce with 1 oz of veggies on the side. sooo easy, veg broth, a can of coconut milk and some curry paste in a deep frying pan. when at a simmer, add fish.
As soon as I'm ok'd for solid food, I'll go back to roasting veggies like broccoli, cauliflower, fennel, asparagus, and brussels sprouts in the oven. I love the way they get caramelized and it is so easy, drizzle with olive oil and salt, put em in the oven and walk away.
In the meantime, I've been boiling or steaming veggies and then drizzling them with a tsp of flavored olive oil - i have a lot of flavors: garlic, lemon, rosemary, cilantro. There is an olive oil store near me and the quality and flavor are great.

I have a set meal for each day of the week. Today is chicken night. Yesterday was fish. Breakfast and lunch are the same each day. It's a rigid schedule but I don't have to make choices. I already made the choices.

The shakes have been a hard part for me too.
I've been using VegaOne. It is pea Protein based, has 20g of Protein per scoop, plus has Fiber and vegetables. 10g of carbs, but 6 of that is Fiber. It is not chalky, but can be gritty due to the veggies in it. You mix it with 12 oz of liquid.
I was having a lot of trouble getting it down when I was mixing it with just Water. I found it much smoother and easier to tolerate when I started using almond milk - 8 oz almond milk, 4 oz Water. For the first 2 weeks, I was only mixing up half a shake at a time, because it gets too thick if you let it sit too long.
I also tried Vega's "protein & greens" line. Also vegan, but really gritty. Someday when I can make a smoothie, I'll try that again.
I've been using Isopure unflavored to stir into food. This is whey protein.

@@deeveg thank u and congratulations on your journey as well. But u see, I was fully expecting to be 50lbs lighter for my return to work transformation and my on purpose accidental bumping into my ex telling him to go to hell moment. This process needs to hurry along if I am to stay on schedule with my transformation/diss ????
Sent from my LG-H631 using the BariatricPal App

congrats on the surgery Angel. Don't be disappointed - 18 pounds is so much weight!! that is about 2 1/2 newborn babies worth of pounds that you aren't carrying around anymore.
And now you are on your way to your goal, and you body will get you there on its unique schedule.

I had my surgery on a Wednesday. I was off Thurs & Fri and then all of the following week. By then, I didn't have much pain and I was doing pretty well with liquids and Protein. The first 7 calendar days were really tough for me, but then all of sudden it got easier and easier each day after that.
I've only told my daughter, son-in-law and parents. I'm a really bad liar so I'm going to stay as close to the truth as I can...... very low carb, high Protein and Portion Control. all of which is true.

I had my surgery on a Wednesday. I was off Thurs & Fri and then all of the following week. By then, I didn't have much pain and I was doing pretty well with liquids and Protein. The first 7 calendar days were really tough for me, but then all of sudden it got easier and easier each day after that.
I've only told my daughter, son-in-law and parents. I'm a really bad liar so I'm going to stay as close to the truth as I can...... very low carb, high Protein and Portion Control. all of which is true.

I am working with my doctor on a high Protein, high fat, low carb diet and I am moving my ass a LOT.

Period.

Any further questions simply get a full resting bitch face and a reply of "I'm sure you didn't mean to sound as rude as you did."

No one has ever asked me if I had surgery. If they did, I would simply ask them why they thought they had the right to ask me such an intrusive question.

i had 2 shots in the hospital on the underside of my upper arm. 3 weeks out and the bruise is still pretty dark. no pain though.

Congrats on your successful journey.

I was sleeved on Oct 5 and by the end of the first week, I was totally dehydrated and my doc had to give me IV fluids. It turned out that I was drinking my liquids too cold. Every time I took a sip, I was contracting my stomach, making it impossible to drink enough. As soon as I switched to room temp liquids, I was able to meet my liquid goal. Now, I keep liquids next to me at all times and sip constantly throughout the day.
Water tastes funny right now (I assume because of ketosis), so I have been drinking a lot of hot tea that I let cool off first.
I tried a lot of different Protein waters, like the clear Isopure, but found them way too sweet for my taste, but maybe you could try something like that - Protein and Water at the same time. Someone in my support group raved about Trimino. I haven't tried it myself though.