Shi-Shi80

I say I've been working very hard (which is true) and I've made big, healthy changes to my eating and exercise habits (also true). Your life and body is not the business of anyone else unless you want it to be.

Keep Rising and Grinding Girl!
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Abby that was very well written. You can't change the past and you can't fix stupid. For your peace of mind, block those negative people. There is a meme and I can't find it. But it said it's okay to remove the negative people from your life so that you can enjoy your happiness.
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Thank you for sharing;this will be a post to reread when I start losing noticeable weight. My oldest son is struggling because he's never had a "skinny" mom. He knows I will change physically, but even at 13,he doesn't realize I'll still be his awesome mom--just healthier.
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You are beautiful both inside and out. I'm happy that you were able to see that comment for its ugly worth. I have 2 of those people stuck in my life too. Not everyone is beautiful like you inside and out.
Hmmmm, we should feed make up to those ugly on the inside people.
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Afternoon all.
I wasn't quite sure where to put this post, but it seems here is the best place, as what I'm going to be talking about today is a huge part of the wls journey and I'm betting everyone here can either relate because they have experienced it, may experience it in the future, or can sympathize because, honestly, I don't know a single overweight person who has not had to deal with the pile of bullsh*t that I've been dealing with lately at some point in their lives.
Last night, I posted a new selfie to Facebook. I've been updating them right along because my face is still changing so much, and I really like being able to see my progress and to quietly share it with my friends and family. I guess this particular selfie made my weight loss especially noticeable, because I woke up this morning to a message from a "friend" on Facebook that essentially said "wow! I'm so happy to see you're getting so healthy! It's so bad that you let yourself get that fat though."
Upon reading this horribly cruel message, I was shocked, humiliated, and for a moment I felt myself blown right back to the place I was two years ago, a place I've worked tirelessly in therapy to climb out of: I felt that I was a worthless, hopeless human being who deserved to be treated this way. When people were cruel to me before, it devastated me because deep down, wayyyy deep down in the darkest and most painful parts of me, I agreed with the horrible things they said to and about me. I must be disgusting, gluttonous, lazy, pathetic, not even worthy of any kind of basic human kindness. After all, I led myself here, right? It's my fault that I'm super-morbidly-obese. I deserve this treatment.
Now, two years later, I more or less look like a normal person. I wear a size 12/14 jeans, a large or medium shirt. I've even gotten to the point where I can sometimes look in a mirror and think "hmm. I think I may feel beautiful today." But messages like the one I got today derail me in a fantastic way, and remind me of that raw, horrible feeling that I'm still struggling with every single day to overcome. His message was almost conspiratorial; like, oh, you're not fat anymore, so we can ridicule and shame your former self together. Like I would agree with him and say "OMG you're right! Fat Me was f*cking disgusting and pathetic. I totally agree with you." Like I was not a person before and now that I am "normal", I am. I hate it more than I can even begin to describe.
I hate that to many people, fat people not only deserve to be treated this way, but also need to be treated this way. There are whole (densely populated, I might add) forums scattered around the internet dedicated to posting pictures and videos of fat people for the sole purpose of shaming and hating them, and the excuse is to somehow motivate fat people into not being fat anymore. That's ludicrous, of course. The real reason is simple. It's pure hate, ignorance, and insecurity on their part. I know this. I believe this. But there is still a little part of me that feels nothing but shame and humiliation in situations like this. Will I always just be "Fat Abby" to the people around me? Am I ever going to escape her? And why should I even hate her in the first place? "Fat Abby" was incredibly sick with a severe hormone disorder, so poor I starved just as often as I gorged on cheap white Pasta and bread, and suicidally depressed. "Fat Abby" had no hope and so did the only logical thing in her mind: she tried to speed up the process of dying young by eating more. That doesn't sound like a lazy, gluttonous piece of crap to me. That sounds like a person who was suffering intensely, every moment of every day. I want to be kind and loving to that hurt former self, not look back and think "man, you were gross. Good thing you're skinny now!"
I've said it before and I'll say it again many times, I'm sure, but I love where I am now. I am so, SO happy that I've made it here, and grateful to everyone and everything the led me here, including my own strong self. I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. But it's also important for me now to express these things here, to people who have or will experience them. Losing hundreds of pounds is a completely incredible feat! But it's just the tiny tip of the iceberg compared to the changes your life will go through after surgery. Do these experiences somehow negate my progress or my pride and joy? Absolutely not. They are just part of the story, and part of the journey.
I am not who I was. I will never be that person again. HOWEVER, being happy that I am not there anymore does not mean that I hate "Fat Abby", nor does it mean that I should be ashamed of her. Nor does it mean I deserve to be treated like an object that everyone gets to stare at and judge. Old Me, and I suspect all the Old Yous who are reading this, were just people who were doing the best they could and were suffering, and so we sought weight loss surgery to heal ourselves. We've done amazing things and changed in ways most other people have not even fathomed.
Remember the Old You without the hate and stigma attached to him/her, and the shame and pain that surrounded living as an obese person in a world that absolutely despises and dehumanizes obese people. Love the Old You just as much as you love the New You, and maybe someday you'll reach a point when you see the entire You with the kind of hope, love, and clarity that will keep you healthy and happy forever.
Attached is the selfie that started this. I love you all.
Cervidae

I'm a side sleeper so I sleep on my right side with a wedge pillow on that side. I've been sleeping like that since I came home Wednesday (I had surgery Tuesday) and it's been wonderful! :-) I had bypass surgery.

Ladystorm you are so right! Getting creative with the Tomato Soup and some spices made a world of difference for me. I just can't do chicken/beef broths and everything else just tastes too sweet.

The catch with this (there's always a catch!) is that it only really works if you self pay for your surgery, or have other substantial medical expenses that, in total, exceed 10% of your adjusted gross income. It all adds up (parking & travel expenses related to medical treatment, too) if you can pass that threshold; otherwise it's a wasted accounting effort.
My sleeve was covered by insurance, so none of these things were deductible, but a couple years later when plastics came along, this medical expense deduction totally offset our tax liability for that year.

After your surgery you can deduct your costs for Vitamins and Protein drinks, mixes etc. because they are both required for a medical condition. This is addressed on the IRS website and I confirmed with my CPA. Save your receipts !! And just add them right into your medical expenses if you itemize.
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Ladystorm you are so right! Getting creative with the Tomato Soup and some spices made a world of difference for me. I just can't do chicken/beef broths and everything else just tastes too sweet.

Wow that was a perfect answer!Thank you! When I was in the hospital, as soon as the nurse told me that I needed NO medication for any comorbidities I cried like a baby!!! To this day EVERYTHING has been regulated. I've been able to monitor my blood sugar and blood pressure at home...all within a perfectly normal range!!! My primary says once my A1C is within normal range he'll consider me no longer diabetic...that's around October for the 3 month window. Yessss! I'm truly grateful and beyond blessed!!!
Dawnie_doo

My insurance only approved me for 4 weeks. My surgery day was Aug 24 and I go back Sept 20. Actually I don't mind that only because I'm hoping they have some overtime at work, lol. But mostly, I'm sure I'll be fine when I actually go back and I don't want to lose my passwords to my systems.
On a odd note, I had to pack my desk before I left because I'm getting a new cube when I get back.

Gas X, Heating pad, sipping lots of Water and walking is about the only thing that will help in my experience.
The good news, it really does go away pretty quick. I think it was day 5 or 6 all the gas was finally out of my system enough to feel more normal.

You'll be eating again... Don't worry too much. Try to be creative within your new eating. It will carry you.
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@@Mudgy6
How are you getting Protein at this point? I know Protein takes some getting used to but it is critical in your diet now. You need it to heal and it needs to be a major part of your diet.
I would keep trying options until I found one. I had a similar situation and finally was recommended premier Protein shakes. They are great because they are ready made so no grit and no fuss. I feel like the chocolate tastes most like rich chocolate milk. Someone pointed this out and I never thought about it but the container is shaped square and the opening small so you don't smell the protein either which makes it easier to drink.
I still drink one every morning and I am 23 months post op.
Keep trying, you don't want to get sick.

I had surgery July 12th. I was just remarking to a friend how delicious my chicken and brocolli were for lunch today. All 4 or 5 bites of it. Being on liquids and puree makes you appreciate eating something solid. While I can't eat much quantity, food tastes great and I'm super happy with my weight loss so far. So much so, that i don't regret a thing. Taking my life back.
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I refuse to weigh myself right now. I had surgery Tuesday (8/23) and that scale just looks like it will cause depression with all of the new changes going on with my body right now. LOL I will weigh myself this upcoming Tuesday and see where I'm at so I'm hoping all of the IV fluids and whatnot have exited my body. Congrats to you all wherever you are in your journey and it's great to read the comments on here for good advice and encouragement.

I refuse to weigh myself right now. I had surgery Tuesday (8/23) and that scale just looks like it will cause depression with all of the new changes going on with my body right now. LOL I will weigh myself this upcoming Tuesday and see where I'm at so I'm hoping all of the IV fluids and whatnot have exited my body. Congrats to you all wherever you are in your journey and it's great to read the comments on here for good advice and encouragement.

I refuse to weigh myself right now. I had surgery Tuesday (8/23) and that scale just looks like it will cause depression with all of the new changes going on with my body right now. LOL I will weigh myself this upcoming Tuesday and see where I'm at so I'm hoping all of the IV fluids and whatnot have exited my body. Congrats to you all wherever you are in your journey and it's great to read the comments on here for good advice and encouragement.

Yep some non surgery victories :-D Friday I went to the movies with a friend and was able to put both arm rest down and still have plenty or room in my chair :-) Now my niece can hug me and wrap her arms all the way around me :-) oooo... Was able to wear a REALY cute pair or wedges all day :-D Okay I wanna hear some of y'all's now :-D

Im training for my first half marathon which is set for Sept 11th of this year! My 1 year post op is September 30th!
Who woulda thought that in ONE year I went from "the fat girl who couldn't run" to "100 pounds down going 13.1"
I am so excited for the challenge. I could barely walk a 27 minute mile before, now I can run almost 5 miles without having to stop. My fastest mile is 7:30 now

At my heaviest weight I was 425lbs. Walking up one flight of stairs was an act of God. I swear all the time and was out of breath more times than not. I really thought that after 30 years of battling my weight that I would die just like that.
On December 3, 2014, I had RNY gastric bypass and what an amazing journey it's been. I'm down over 250lbs from my heaviest weight and 163 since my surgery.
I can walk, breathe, run and live freely. I always felt trapped in my body and now I feel like I can do anything! On November 6th I'm running the NYC Marathon and for a woman who needed prayer to walk up one flight it's a testament to how this tool can work if you really work it!
Every day is a blessing!

Yes, I had my RNY on August 18th, and my stomach was gurgling like crazy for the first full week, just started slowing down on Day 8 post-op.
I decided it was my stomach yelling "What the f*** is going on here???!!!!"
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I could sleep on one side with pillows under side so doesn't pull at stomach
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