puddin

THANK YOU!!! I'll post an update after our date on Friday.

You guys are FUNNY! Maybe I'll eat some kimche before, that stuff makes your breath unbearable. Brenda, woman, I am so proud of you. And now that your excess stomach (and boobs, for that matter) is gone you'll be able to push it so much harder. Running with a flabby stomach is not the easiest thing in the world. I bet you work that 13-minute mile down really, really quickly. And 13 minutes is AWESOME! Disneyland sounds like SO much fun, too. Your husband's a rock star. I wanna go with you guys! Ok, so here are the blanks filled in: I went to a mission reunion last Friday. My old mission prez kept grilling me on how I was doing. I took one last look into the man's eyes after telling him everything was "fine" and confessed all my sins LOL! Oh my, so he took me into a room and gave me an interview, so to speak. I guess once a mission president always a mission president. He told me to dump Jacques. Uh yup. He said, "He's not good enough for you." I don't know where he got that as I did the same thing HE did, but the man is inspired, he's never steered me wrong, so... that's what I have to do. It's going to be hard and Jacques won't see it coming, but I have to do it. Raaaaaah! Why is this SO HARD??!!! The thing is that I won't even know what to say to the man. I have no reason to break up with him except that my mission prez told me to do it and I respect him. Anyhow, went out with Travis (Seth's bro). He's pretty amazing you guys. Actually a GOOD GUY! What the heck??? No makeout, just cuddle action. We're going out again Friday. We've been talking on the phone a lot. I really like this guy. He's just everything I'm looking for, and, according to him, I'm everything HE is looking for. I'm trying not to get my hopes up with this guy, but it's hard not to. He's a slow mover, though, which is good for me. The man has serious self-control. He has made some mistakes, like me (though not quite as serious), but we're both working through them. So I guess that's where things stand right now.

Hey Girl Sorry, I didn't see this post until you PM'd me! Anyhow, yes, I'd be happy to share how it all went down: No, I was never, ever athletic in my whole life. I was banded and was a slow loser until about month 7 or 8, when I had an "aha" moment and realized that the band wasn't going to work for me unless I MADE it work. So I bought this gadget called the body bugg that tracks calories burned accurately and got moving. At first I hated the exercise, then grew to sort of like it. Then my good friends got into biking. I was jealous of how much fun they had on their trips. As soon as I was down enough for my stomach NOT to be in the way, I bought a bike and started with them. This is when the weight really started coming off! I was hooked. Then I started getting into soccer, which led to running... which has now led to the triathlon. I got SO into biking that I ended up riding around 35-50 miles each day on the weekdays and longer on the weekends. The running became a challenge for me with my extra belly fat. But I learned to jog at about 5 mph (a 12-minute mile) until I had my tummy tuck, and now I am doing about a 10-minute mile. It's exhilirating to watch my minutes/mile decrease. I'm hoping to be down to an 8-9 minute mile during my tri. I have to admit that the addiction for food sort of just transfered over to exercise. I have an addictive personality, so this goes with it, the tendency to go all-out with things. I don't know the meaning of the word moderation. As far as advice goes, if you're motivated by numbers and statistics, get yourself the body bugg. You'll be motivated to just get moving and burning more calories because you'll actually SEE what you're burning. It's helped me so greatly. Good luck to you. I know you can do this and MAKE it work for you!

Thank you, Karey. I agree. I WAS worried with Seth - he's just sort of strangely charming with his complete, brutal honesty, and his good looks. But in the end we made the right decision, and he was a good guy about it and hooked me up with his bro. Oh my, I have a pic of this boy on my blog that exemplifies his personality - cocky, a little beligerent, athletic... Anyhow, dang, wish I had a pic of his bro. Now what to do about that bike trip to Denmark with Jacques this July??? Oh my, I'm in a predicament with that one. There's no way we're not going to do something when 1-we've done it before, 2-we're sharing a hotel room that week, and 3-we're alone (the friend backed out). I need to come up with a good creative solution to this one, because I definitely want to go to Denmark.

HA! Okay, went out with Seth. Guess what? I got his bro! LOL! We doubled with his brother. Anyhow, his brother calls me about 15 minutes after the date ends and asks me out. I love it. Seth's not such a bad guy. Apparently this was his intention. He was putting up a badass front, but deep down he's a nice guy. So me and his bro are going out next weekend sometime.. Remember the sick feeling I had? It kind of went away when we decided to not go to each others' houses and double. I'm so glad now.

Hey Chrispy I'm just not going to let that rule go. Seriously. I'm just going to go cold turkey. I've done it before, I can do it again. In fact, after the first time I went cold turkey with the making out (when I was in my early 20's) I really honestly and truly forgot what it was like to be addicted to it until... well, now. I can still be a sexual being, but I'd like to keep that within the confines of marriage. I can't find a good guy like this. My belief is that God will show me a good guy when I'm ready for him. And a good guy isn't going to want me right now. I joke that I'm the perfect girl on paper but in reality I'm all messed up LOL. I was way more emotionally balanced when fat. So weird how losing weight makes you sort of lose your identity and then you're all over the place again. Hey, I got a fill today and my nurse brought up something very interesting. She said they'd been hearing a lot lately about addiction replacement, and asked me specifically if I'd been replacing my food addiction with another addiction. Funny. There needs to be more education about this to those being banded. There WILL be a need for addiction replacement. Honestly, I wonder if a 12-step program would work for us? Hey Liz, was it cool? It would have been awesome to watch the surgery. Don't let it scare you. It's not THAT bad! Ok people, date with Seth in 1 hr 15 min... we're going to an arcade - NICE AND SAFE! Then I'll tell him I want to date his brother LOL.

Pamela... I really like this advice of yours. I decided yesterday, really decided, to be true to myself. I thought to myself, "Self, one of two things has got to go in order for you to be at peace: You've either got to be okay with being slightly promiscuous (not that I'm sleeping around with every guy. Just two guys in the last 4 months, I was in love with one of them and was going to marry him an the other I really, really like still, and the rest have been bad makeouts or phone sex) and forget your moral beliefs, or you have to give up the promiscuity and be true to your moral and church standards." It was a no-brainer. I have found myself in actual withdrawals from it. I was so pissy yesterday because I was horny with no outlet LOL. I resisted the "phone sex" with Seth, because we're both working on being good. I even prayed... really hard... to just know what to do to be happy. I have found myself feeling low because I have no scheduled dates after Thursday. How pathetic! Why should I need a man to be happy with ME? I seem to always need a man around to feel good about myself. It's ridiculous. So I'm working on things to get the focus off of myself for awhile. I used to volunteer at the temple on Saturdays until I couldn't any more (because of the sex), so I'm going to replace that with the food bank or something. I don't know, I just need to not focus on me for awhile. Liz you are so freakin funny. I like your posts and your PMs... and your pics, for that matter. Wait, can I be you? And I do appreciate your 'romp in the dirt' funny attitude. I've certainly been embracing it lately. But I think overall I'll be happier not doing it. I'll let them chase me for awhile. Hell, maybe I'll take a dating hiatus, even. I'm thinking a good month oughtta put things into perspective - and give me a few free nights a week to play soccer with the league LOL. I miss it. It's a nice outlet. You don't have to play games with the ball to get it to like you, you just kick the hell out of it. Rene, you're hilarious! What's my "position" on toys? jk. In my church we don't believe in masturbating, so I don't (despite the fact that I've done other bad things). It's funny, I went out with that guy last Friday and told him I wouldn't watch a rated R movie but then after we made out hardcore LOL. I guess you gotta not let all those standards go. But as far as toys go within the marriage, between couples, as far as I know that's just fine. But you know what's funny? Seth wants to have phone sex before we go out on Thursday, you know, to get it all "out" before we go out, that way there will be no temptation. I told him that was the stupidest idea I'd ever heard.

Oh yeah, and sorry, Angie, yes, I was self-pay. The lower-body lift was $8,500. A tummy tuck alone would have been, I believe, $4,500. I didn't have my inner thighs done, but a body lift does an outer thigh lift by default. I didn't have lipo done on my legs, I just lost like 15 pounds after the surgery.

Thank you all for being so concerned. I'm concerned, too. And I've just decided to change. I'm not happy doing this crap. I know it's not right, it's causing a lot of internal conflict and heartbreak. I'm not going to really date for awhile after this week. I have the trip planned with Jacques (the guy on my flickr photo site) in July. I expressed to him last night that we HAVE to behave ourselves on this trip, so maybe we can stay in hostels with other people in the room. I know there will be opportunities to be immoral with each other, but he's a good, strong guy. I know if I set boundaries and we talk about them, he'll respect them... He doesn't know what I've been up to here in Utah. I feel badly about that, not because we're exclusive or anything, but because I just feel like I've deceived him. I'm sure he thinks I'm more involved with him than I really am. I don't know if I ever want to tell him. I just want to not do it any more. Anyhow, Angie, THANK YOU! The new guy is Jacques and he IS hot He's not really new, I guess. But yeah, the link you posted is a few weeks old, but I was in a solid 8 then. The swelling has gone down even further, that's why I can fit into a tight 6, except my thighs are still big, so I have to get "curvy" 6 jeans. But it's still unreal to me.

Eva, girl, you don't sound harsh. But the truth is he's NOT using me for anything except the fact that he wants to go out with me. That's it. I'm a totally equal participant in the phone sex, too. In fact, I probably instigate it more than he does... well that's stretching it. I am very, very, very attracted to this boy - probably partly because he IS a bad boy and the other part is just his looks. The phone sex is my total weakness and any time I do the phone sex with a guy it's a pretty much guaranteed hardcore makeout session, usually involving some type of sex (though not intercourse) the next time we get together. This is why it has got to stop. Anyhow, I can't contact his brother directly because I don't even have his number. Seth is just doing what Seth does... DATE. And yes, I am behaving quite childish. I'm acting like a player. I know it. I really am using guys. I feel bad after I do, but when we both want it it's SOOOOO hard to say no. I realize that's a stupid excuse. It's hard for everyone to say no. And perhaps I do have a sexual addiction like my ex thought I did. I went out with a guy last Friday, a first date, and yes, we made out pretty hardcore at the end of the date. But I stopped things before the pants came off. He just laid there and said, "I have GOT to be good. It sucks putting the brakes on, though." I just can't seem to WANT these guys after I've made out with them like that. Karey, I don't feel unloved or even unworthy of a good guy. And I'm not letting them take advantage of me. It's entirely mutual. It wasn't really mutual with my ex, to be honest with you. I felt date-raped by him the first time. But then it just got easier and easier. Jacques, believe it or not, is a really good guy, despite the fact that we did have sex. I feel bad for letting it go as far as it did - he hasn't done it since he joined the church (at 23 years old). He went on a mission a year later, became A.P. on his mission, came home, has been just an awesome, awesome strong guy, in every way. We just made a mistake. I wasn't using Jacques. I have genuine feelings for him and he does for me, too... I would probably marry him and move to Denmark if he asked me tomorrow. Not because I'm desperate or feel the need to marry immediately, but because he's wonderful and I know he'd make an amazing husband. And I realize that my Heavenly Father loves me no matter what. I realize that I can repent of this. But first I have to have Godly sorrow, and I just don't yet. But hitting bottom sucks. When I broke up with my ex I hit rock bottom, felt the Godly sorrow, and repented... but here I go again, seemingly unable to remember the pain or sorrow for the sin, despite the fact that the word 'remember' echoed in my head for an entire two months, and I didn't know why. I know why now I should have sought the meaning to that word, but I never had 'time'. I don't want to wax Freud on you, but I wonder if this is somehow a subconscious effort to bring myself down to the level of my ex. I'm still in love with the dirty bastard but I was just... better than he was. Anyhow, I'm blogging, too. You guys, I'll most likely cancel with Seth. I bet we'll talk tonight and I'm sure the conversation will be turbulent like it usually is. At one turbulent point I'll just say "Seth, you're a cool guy, but I don't want to go out with you." End of story.

Brenda What an incredible experience for your daughter. Even though we sometimes don't listen to that voice, when we don't it just reaffirms why we SHOULD HAVE and makes us more likely to listen the next time. Here's the thing, though: I'm not sure that I'm sick over this because I'm just worried that a. he'll reject me, or b. he'll try to make out with me and he goes too far with it. In a way I want to go out with him so he'll invite me on his river rafting trips and his other extreme sport adventures. He has really fun friends. But HE is kind of a jerk. Have you ever seen Elimidate? He was on it. You know how those guys are that have the women pining for them on the show? That's exactly how he is. Beautiful... but cocky, in the worst way. This modeling agency set him up with it. And he has ADHD, which he uses as an excuse for his erratic behavior constantly. We talk for hours on end, but it's mostly me telling him that he's messed up, or swapping sports stories. But then there's also the phone sex... yeah, I know. He calls late at night, like midnight, and we talk until 4 AM, and it ALWAYS involves phone sex more than once. He kind of likes the abuse from me, though, I think. He says I'm a "cool girl," but he has no idea I was the fat orchestra nerd in high school and he was the coolest kid in school - we just DON'T match up. In a way I want to just get it over with and finally go out with him. The boy had hernia surgery a couple weeks ago, so I don't think he'll try to have sex with me. It would hurt too bad for him. Anyhow, I think I'll pray about it. If I still have that sick feeling I won't go out with him... or his good brother, I guess. His brother does triathlons and isn't ADHD and isn't NEAR as cocky, just picky, and is religious. He tells me his bro is still a virgin, and he's 29. I really, really wanna date this guy. I get along better with him. But dammit, Seth is the connection. He says he won't tell his bro that he went out with me or about the phone sex. Seth claims to have an 80% marriage success rate with his set-ups LOL, and he thinks I'm perfect for his bro, and I'd have to sort of agree. So WHY does he have to go out with me first??? He's freakin crazy.

Karey You're very sweet. Thanks for your words of encouragement. You're absolutly right, too. I don't want to go inactive. The church is so incredibly important to me. The funny thing about all of this is that I have continued to say my prayers, read my scriptures, pay my tithing, go to church, etc. I just have this one BIG problem. But I know this problem could spread to inactivity, especially if I were excommunicated. I do feel terribly about this. But I have resolved myself to not do it again until I'm married. I've slipped up on a couple dates, not with full-on sex, but with some hardcore making out. But, you know, I never had this stupid problem before Kori, my ex. Once it was lost, it has been SO hard to not do things with men. And I do have issues, though I didn't think I did. Many of them come as a consequence of sin, mostly the sin from my most serious relationship with Kori, and also the incredible rejection afterwards. It was like I gave him something precious and then he threw me away. I felt terrible. I'm very much like a teenager, dating-wise. I don't know how to keep boundaries, I'm just... horny, basically. I don't even respect some of these guys, and especially don't respect them after making out with them and then never call or respond to them again. I seem to have maintained my respect for Jacques, however, strangely enough. Maybe because we had a friendship base prior. But I need to listen more, Karey. Like, for example, I have a date with a guy next Thursday. For some reason I feel sick about it, very sick. I KNOW he's a bad boy and he uses women, however, he promises up and down that he won't try to make out with me. He's an honest guy, so I believe he intends not to. But on the other hand... why do I feel so sick about it? I think I'm hunt for him. He's the kind of guy who can get any woman he wants: He's been a model, into extreme sports, beautiful, beautiful body, surfer-type dude, very "cool"... the kind of guy I would have never dreamt of going out with... and so I really think I'm not his type. I said, "Seth, I think you're a really cool guy, but I don't want to go out with you." Well ever since he's just been laying it on THICK. And that's why I think I'm the hunt. He wants what he can't have. I know it would never work out with HIM, but I want the boy to set me up with his brother, who IS a good guy, but Seth says he won't until I go out with him, first. Then he says I can have his bro. He told me that he thought I'd be good for his brother, but that he didn't want to pass up the opportunity to first say he didn't want me, just in case. Oh my. I feel so passed around. Anyhow, it's like I'm blogging here and I'm sorry... but Karey, I will honestly try to be better. I'm going to pray hard for some strength tonight, and especially for the upcoming week where I have a few dates that may end up going in that direction.

Have I got a shake for YOU! The Apex Chocolate Fit drink mix tastes exactly like a milkshake - no kidding. I have always hated protein shakes, so has my sister. But she likes these for desert! Apparently the orange cream one is to die for, too. You can get them online at www.myapex.com.

Oh you guys are FUNNY!!! Seems like these things have a lot to do with body parts. Mine came as a senior in high school. I was on the diving board during swim class, the entire class looking up at me, waiting for me to jump, when one of the boys in class yelled "Hey cupie doll! Can I pull your string?" Yeah, I was on my period at the time and the really fun string was sticking straight out and the nice boy happened to notice it and point it out to everyone. I just quickly dove in and then stayed underwater as LOOOOONG as possible.

I felt like this, too, when I first got the band. Let me just reassure you that yes, you will enjoy eating again. The first few weeks really... suck. But you'll eat normally again, I promise. I can eat ANYTHING, if I eat it slow enough. Sometimes it's just not worth it, though. Like a tough steak, the time it takes to chew is just not worth it. So I choose other items and don't even miss it. But FYI, I haven't had any problems at all with MOST steak, if that's your fav food. My problems are with, believe it or not, Peanut Butter south beach Cereal bars, and sandwiches. The cereal bars I still eat because i love the taste, I just eat them slow. I never cared for sandwiches, so great, who cares if I can't eat them easily. There's light at the end of your newly banded tunnel. I hardly ever remember that I'm banded now, except that I visit this site sometimes.

I felt the same way. I'm 28, too, and single... but once the weight came off the men came out of the woodwork. Randomly. I date a lot. Like at least 2-3 times a week (see my tri blog, it has doubled as my dating blog, I swear). So don't lose hope, even in Utah we can find someone.

Gosh, head hunger is still a big problem for me, you guys. I'm truly not the model bandster and I'll tell you why: The reason I've lost so much is not because I only eat 1,000 calories a day or anything like that. I actually probably eat around 2,000/day. I just work out all the freakin' time. I replaced obsession with food with obsession with exercise. Sorry y'all. Wish I could give you more. I am passionate about exercise, however. If I have a free minute I'm either biking, running, swimming, playing soccer, or traveling. I suppose having something to do every spare minute keeps me from eating by default. But since I can eat a lot, I do, and I need to in order to keep up with the physical activity. But see, I'm not married, don't have kids, and broke up with the boyfriend 3 months ago, so I have all kinds of free time for the physical activity. But you can reach that goal through calorie deficit, whether it be through food or through exercise. So if you don't have time for tons of exercise, keep on top of those fills and have low-cal snacks around that fill you up. A few triscuts always filled me up when I had good restriction. That restriction has since gone since I've lost quite a bit more since the last fill. Funny how weight loss affects your fills.

Hey! Just noticed this thread. Word up, Utah. I'm curious to know how many of us were banded at SV Surgical. Love those guys.

Oh Brenda, you are on the road to recovery! Sounds like you're rockin the treadmill and the other workouts. You're just about to what I'm doing. I'll usually do 3.2 miles on the treadmill every day. I do 5.3 miles per hour with a 1 minute rest at 3.5 mph every 10 minutes. Did it scar you to read your daughter's myspace? What is she doing in SLC? Going to the U of U? I may be working there pretty soon doing web analytics. So how does the whole upstairs without a bedroom door work? That would certainly scar a child LOL. But it's good to know my mom may just forget what she's read. Honestly, it was a stupid, stupid thing to put up. It's essentially my diary online. I don't care if total strangers read it, in fact, the thought is somewhat liberating to me. But my MOM can't read it! Anyhow, yes, I am LDS. I actually served a mission for my church a few years ago in Canada, same area where I'm doing the triathlon and where my ex is from. Ahh, those were the days when I was a good girl... I think subconsciously I may have kept the weight on, and kept gaining, because I knew this would be an issue for me if I was skinny and I didn't want to deal with it. Please don't get me wrong, I love my church with all my heart, and I love God with all my heart, but the flesh is weak, especially right now. I'm not making any excuses for my behavior. It's GOT to change or I'll never progress, especially with Jacques, if we keep doing what we're doing. This can't continue. Maybe my mom finding my blog is a wakeup call for me. I didn't post the really bad stuff I did with him, THANK HEAVENS! But she may have just figured it out. But yes, sex before marriage is a big deal in my religion. And having sex multiple times before marriage is an even bigger deal - especially when you've been on a mission. If I don't stop I'll get excommunicated - my worst nightmare. And Jacques will, too, so we need to quit this business before it ruins us. My ex was excommunicated and it DID ruin his life. He's working really hard to get back, but screwed that up with me, too. Set him back very, very far, and me too. So can you sense the internal conflict going on? Whether or not you believe in sex before marriage, you can't keep doing something you dont believe in doing or it destroys you from the inside. So that's where I am toady. Happy day! But really, going out of town this weekend with friends will help me to clear my head and get my priorities straight again. Have a fantastic weekend, y'all!

Alright, Brenda, my MOTHER has found my blog. Oh sh*$ is all I have to say! There are secrets there. Deep, dark secrets! That's what I get for posting my damn name in the title LOL! I'm such a dork. Why did I think she was too Internet dumb to find it??? I'm her virginly daughter. Guess she knows now. THANK HEAVENS I never blogged about doing the really bad things with Jacques. But I think the talking dirty stuff was enough to scare the woman. And now she knows about the Canada incident, too. She calls me on the phone today and says, "Hey, I showed my colleague your porn pic." I'm like "which one?" LOL, thinking she'd gone to my flickr site (which is mom-safe). She says "You know, the one on your triathlon site." I almost threw up. She had showed her colleague my tummy-tuck pics, but amongst the tummy-tuck pics are the dirty, internet-voyeurish secrets, ones that MOMS shouldn't see! It's like walkin in on your parents. She DID say, "Yeah, all I showed her were your pictures. I can't handle reading the rest of it." Oh my. That means she freakin' read it. She handled it well. I am an adult and I make my own stupid decisions and she respects it. But I really wanted my mom to see me as the GOOD daughter. Oh hell, maybe she can relate to me now. After all, she's got a past, too. So I faced it head-on (after looking like a deer in headlights) and posted a "Hi Mom" on the site. Of course, I also went through the blog and deleted all references to sex (well... most. I figured I couldn't take out Canada). So no more references to boys, making out, Jacques, or sex. I'll save that for the PRIVATE blog, which shall always remain nameless and under password protection. Sure glad I won't see her for the next two weeks!

Girl you will GET THERE! You're a pusher (not a drug pusher), and I know you'll reach whatever goal you set. I can tell. You're a high achiever, for sure. And your boobs look good too LOL. I'm jealous. Mine are small. Like a small B. Good to know yours are a "c" because they look about how I want mine to look. Yes, the new guy is a good one, I think. Here's the thing, though: We're both religious people, but we can't seem to be good together. It's the same damn problem I had with my ex. It causes internal conflict. On one hand I don't believe in sex before marriage, on the other hand I can't seem to stop! He feels bad about it, too. He's gone until April for work so I'm trying to take this opportunity to move our relationship out of the sex realm and into reality reality. We were there once, we can get there again. Oh my, I'm honest with you people. It's because you're all anonymous LOL. But anyhow, he does have it all. I'm attracted to goal-oriented men, and money usually comes with that. I'm not attracted to money, but they seem to have it, only because they're all goal-driven. I'm somewhat independently wealthy and I don't really need a guy for his money, I'd rather have him for other qualities. He's DEFINITELY got looks! But what I love most about him is that he likes the same stuff I like: Road cycling, hiking, swimming, running, kayaking, traveling, culture, dirt biking, etc. He's got this hard body like you wouldn't believe. It's beyond a 6-pack. He's 6'1", looks like a greek statue. But in addition to that he's so sweet to me, very caring. He's also got a british accent. BRITISH ACCENT, people! He's some kind of trainer for the British Royal Army in Denmark, but he's here about half the time for the army. I have to admit, his preciseness bothers me a little. But he's a real gentleman. Okay, I'm going on and on. I'll stop now. FOR SURE let me know if you come to SLC in April. We can go shopping at the Gateway or go for a bike ride, if you like that and have time. It'd be a treat. We could even go to the Rocky Mountain chocolate Factory (shhhh, I didn't say that). I hope I can eat SOMETHING there. These braces are driving me crazy. I got them yesterday. I have to have them on for the next 4 months!

Brenda I just love you. You're so real. Luv the real. I think you already look fantastic and you're going to look even more fantastic in a few months. You'll get there with the cardio. It takes awhile to build up that muscle endurance again, too. I bet you're very surprised at how quickly you pick back up. It's like an exponential curve, truly. The belt lipectomy sort of tightened my legs, yes. They didn't specifically work on my legs, but by pulling up my butt and abs, it smoothed out my legs quite a bit. Plus I lost like 15 more pounds after I got the belt. Yeah, they don't touch any more - crazy! I fit (tight) into size 6's today. SIZE 6!!! Holy hell, I couldn't believe it. I haven't been that size since I was 2 years old. They were short shorts, though. Could never have done it with jeans as my legs are not a size 6, just my stomach/hips. My legs are more like 8's or 10's. I need to update my ticker. I'm like 150 pounds now. Just 10 more pounds, I swear it. No more after that. Promise. Brenda, hun, you don't have to fess up that you were once the fat girl. I don't mention it until like the 3rd date anyway. The new fella I'm dating has seen old fat pics of me, and guess what? He doesn't care! Shocked the hell out of me when he kissed me after saying, "you were still beautiful." Boy, I could fall for this guy. Anyhow, just live it up. You're hot, girl, and you can strut it once in awhile. Hey, do you just love your boobs? I'm thinking of having mine done. They're not saggy because I just never had any, but I'm thinking of getting implants. Smaller ones - like a C or something. Do you have any implants? Love the personal trainer, girl. He's going to get you looking even hotter. Just do what the man says with a smile on that beautiful face of yours.

Hey, maybe if you have gallstones when the doc goes in, you can write off part of your surgery to your insurance - that is, if you're self-pay. I was HOPING to get gall stones so I could get banded at the same time and save myself $6,000 for the anesthesia, operating room fees, etc.

LOL. Did you have a mental breakdown? Don't do it! I was a little upset that I super sucked with my workouts after the lower-body-lift. It took me a good 2 weeks to build up to where I was before. I think I was about 7 weeks out before totally being back to normal. Just pace yourself, girl. Everyone's different. I'm sure I overdid it when I first started jogging again. It probably set me back. What I want to know is when this damned swelling is going to go away. It's cramping my style. When i sit down I have a pooch on my upper-stomach. I know it's the swelling. I have heard it can take as much as 9 months to go away. PuhLEASE don't tell me that! I want it to be gone by next month when Jacques (new guy) comes back in town. He's got no body fat on him, I swear, the dirty bastard. Just rock-hard, beautiful abs. Beautiful, beautiful abs.. ahhhhhhh.. okay daydreaming over! We'll get there, Brenda. Just stick to that routine and you'll bounce back, I'm certain! Hey, when are ya coming to Utah?

Lisa, you're hot!