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What work best for me was constantly keeping the reason I was having Bariatric surgery right up front. It motivated the heck out of me. I spent my pre op time very focused on learning new habits. - stopped drinking any calories and changed to bottled Water only - no carbonated beverages what so ever - I used to watch tv while I ate. I started eating at the kitchen table and removing all distractions - I am the cook so I focused on removing starches from the menu for myself. Good Protein, veggies and fruit - I began using a smaller plate to serve my food on - I timed my eating to not go longer than 30 minutes and to last around 20 minutes. - I practiced chewing food like crazy (I found this to be the hardest and still do) - I began walking every day increasing the length of time and the distance I was walking My nutritionist was more focused on this than on actual weight loss. I lost weight but it literally was around 10lbs and I was on a 6 month required diet. My weight fluctuated constantly. The insurance company and surgeons want to ensure that you take this step very seriously, it is why they have these monitored programs before they will approve you for surgery. If you want this bad enough, you will do it. I promise it is worth all of the effort and everything you learn now, will help with long term success post surgery. Sometimes I cannot believe how different I approach food. I eat to live, I do not live to eat any longer.

Thanks guys for the feedback and tips. I found another plastic surgeon late this evening. Completed a request and got a call back at 7pm from her. She is providing a free consultation because I told her that I saw her and her reviews on real self. She of course wants to see me but even after spending 30 minutes on the phone, she gets what I am looking for and asked that I bring in some pictures of breast lifts that look a little too big and a little too small. She said believe it or not, it helps her assess exactly where I will want to be. She is pretty confident I will be able to get all 3 done at the same time and I am ecstatic about that. Of course she said she needs to spend time with me on my medical history and how much work she needs to do for each procedure but I might be looking at one long operation. I personally would prefer that over several small ones but whatever. She also provide a ballpark cost of about 21,000 for all 3 components to get done. That includes a night in the hospital. My head was somewhere much higher so I feel ok about that. Thanks for all the suggestions, they are helping to make my list. I want to make sure we discuss all my worries up front.

@@AvaFern That is a great point on the arm scars! It is honestly the one part of my body that I am most self conscious about because my bat wings are awful. I have lost a lot of weight there but I still have fat at the bottom of those wings. I really don't want to lose any more weight because i like the way I look now and I am at a healthy bmi. For the last 3 weeks I have lost nearly 10lbs which has not happened for me since I was probably 9 months post op. I wish I would lose it in my arms and tummy. LOL. I swear it just comes off my face and butt. I don't have a butt anymore to lose! I think I have been on real self no less than 20 hours over the last couple of weeks. I plan to take some tips from @elode. I read every step of her journey and she had a ton of learnings from her experience that I plan to steal. I will be bringing pictures of what i do want and what I don't want hoping we can get close. I am older and honestly never plan to wear a bikini or anything like that but I really didn't realize you could end up with a brown belly button if you are not careful. Who knew? I am looking forward to a flat tummy, normal arms (I am prepared for the scars) and boobs that don't have to be stuffed in a bra. LOL. I have always been a full C and have been trying on Bs lately. I would not be happy with just a lift knowing it would make me much smaller than I want to be and I think hubby would literally cry. So, a full D would be better which means a lift and augmentation is probably more likely. Thanks again for your feedback.

I am excited to say that I am finally at a place where I am considering plastic surgery. I know that I want to have it done here, near my home. I have found 3 board certified plastic surgeons with excellent patient reviews and have scheduled consultations with them. I am very excited about one of them and hope that she is as good as her reviews. I plan to focus on my upper body because it bothers me the most. I have lost 151lbs, nearly half my body weight. I am 53 years old so I don't have great elasticity in my skin. I feel fairly lucky that my weight was pretty much everywhere and I lost everywhere. My arms are the worst though. It is probably one of two spots where I still have some fat but large bat wings that make me crazy trying to cover them up, especially in the summer. As most of you know, when your arms are bigger it is harder to find clothing that fits right. I am in a size 8 pants but a 12 on top because of my arms. Of course the sleeves are always tight and everything else looks baggy. Ugh! I plan to have a brachioplasty, Abdominalplasty and breast lift with augmentation. The girls are lookin sad and empty and they are no longer where they belong. I am trying to gather a list of questions that I would discuss during the consultations. I got the basics down but am wondering if those of you who have had surgery might have some questions that I have not thought about. Did you wish you would have asked something that you didn't? If so, would you mind sharing them with me as I prep for my meetings. They begin on July 7th. Thanks so much for your help!

@@Renkoss I learned my lesson that day with the glucose tabs. My sugar was too low, I couldn't find them and I don't keep juice in my home. I literally tore the cabinet apart and found them and then even struggled to open the container because I was shaking so bad. Now, they sit right on my end table. They are opened and ready to use. I do not use Protein powder at all. Because I have kidney problems I have to be careful not to have more than 70 grams of protein per day. I get that between my one premier Protein shake that I have every morning religiously and my other meals. I have oatmeal or cream of wheat very rarely when I have a craving for it and have learned that I just need to make sure I get that protein snack between. I have found that if you let more carbs into your diet on a regular basis the chance of you developing reactive hypoglycemia is much higher. I try not to let that happen but there are days I simply want something besides protein and veggies. I eat a lot of fresh fruit, dehydrated apple chips and once per day I have a starch in one of my meals. My nut believes in a balanced approach vs. just protein and veggies and so far it has worked for me. Thankfully I only experience that reactive hypoglycemia on occasion. The bad part is when it happens you can actually cause it to go on all day. I have learned to stop it as soon as it happens.

@@1Day1Life4Now Just wanted to be sure as you are giving advice that you understand that it is just as easy to cheat with the bypass. Most people do not get dumping syndrome and even if they do you can eat around the surgery and gain your weight back. The only solution is to follow the food plan as close as you can, exercise and do not eat small meals all day long. 1 (800) calorie beer is almost as much as I eat in a day. My calorie intake is between 1000 and 1200. I am 22 months post op RNY today. Currently I do not drink anything but Water and maybe milk once per week. I will enjoy a glass of wine for the first time in August after I am finally finished with narcotics, I am weaning off fentanyl following 3 major surgeries in 9 months. I personally would never consider a drink with that many calories. I worked too hard to get to where I am.

I slowly weaned off the pressures at about 1 year post op. It got to a point where I was on the lowest possible settings and my mouth was constantly popping open because the minimum pressure was too much.

LOL. I know right?!!! My husband is very supportive. Unfortunately my good behaviors have not rubbed off on him. He goes to the store and brings way too much crap in. I am always looking at donuts, chips, bugles, Cheez its, among other things. Good think I have great will power!

I cannot speak regarding sleeve patients but from a bypass perspective it is critical that you do not eat and drink at the same time. The reason for this is because you can accidentally push larger amount of food through the stoma causing it to stretch over time. Once that stretches, you lose the value of the surgery because food makes its way through faster causing you to need to eat more often. If you happen to be someone like me who probably does NOT chew enough even now, that can be a big problem for you. Never eat and drink at the same time. I read an article about this and followed up by asking my doctor. She confirmed this is true. The article led me to believe that it is true for sleeve patients as well but I am not positive about that nor did I confirm that portion. Maybe someone else knows for sure. The stoma is the part of our surgeries that can get stretched by not following the no drink rule. There are many myths about the stomach stretching when it is in fact the stoma that opens to the small intestine.

I always told myself I was big boned and like you my bones are actually very petite. None of my old jewelry fits and my mother N law's jewelry does fit either. She was tiny!!!! When she passed away I got a lot of her jewelry and I need to get most of it resized. - I told myself after many diets that failed because of regain that I was happy fat. - I told myself I really didn't eat much so I simply had a crappy metabolism and I no longer needed to try. - I told myself many many times that I worked hard, had a ton of stress and deserved to eat crappy food. The list could go on an one.....

LOL. I had to look at this post just because of the title knowing full well beforehand what you were going to say.

I usually bring 2. A delicious fruit salad. Yum! Some type of high Protein dish like meatballs or sloppy joes (no bun for me), lunch meat & cheese rolls, chili dip with veggies for dipping and Fritos for those that don't have to watch it. Recently I made a fruit salsa with strawberries, mango, red onion, jalapeño and cilantro. Then for the chips I took won tons and cut them in quarters, sprinkled them with a very light dusting of cinnamon and sugar and baked them in the oven. Can I say yum!!!!

How did you do it? Honestly it is getting old trying to discern who I am comfortable telling and who I am not. If I do share that I had surgery it is always followed by people sharing the horror stories or them wondering if I get sick a lot. For someone like me who has yet to have dumping, always feels pretty good it can get old. It's almost like a canned response that has become mechanical. If it is someone who really is interested because they themselves have been considering surgery I don't mind talking all day about it. That is rarely the case though.

It really is important to know what you are consuming to try to help you through this. I know that I had some long stalls along the way as well and thought I was done losing. The reality is you likely need to make an adjustment because your body has gotten too used to what you are doing and has stalled. For me, I had to raise my calories but also adjust my carbs/protein. For me I started eating almost the same things for Breakfast and lunch every single day along with even the same Snacks. For dinner I would change up my Proteins and veggies but it always amounted to the same calorie/carb/protein count daily. That would get me stuck after a while. I began to change up what I was eating and even changed what exercises I do to help my body get out of a rut. I think the longest stall I had was about 4 months. I reached goal in March and things settled down. Now in the last month I dropped another 8lbs and that is because I really did change those routines. If you provide us with more info, we might be able to help you get past this stall. I do not believe you are done.....you just need to adjust. If I can get to goal even after not being able to exercise for the last year due to 3 major surgeries....anyone can. I had no choice but to control my diet because I could only do PT type exercises. Nothing that really burns calories. Hopefully this makes some sense?

@@Tiffany2015 HUGS x 10! I am so very sorry that you are going through such a tough time. I hope that you take the time to speak with a therapist who can help you with the grief that you feel. You seem like a very positive person and positivity always helps me through tough situations so leverage it as much as you can. As others have said, menopause sucks but it does differ for each individual. I had a hysterectomy in 2003 but they left my ovaries. Now I am going through menopause and I have some pretty severe symptoms. I have chosen not to take anything for them. One thing I will tell you is gaining weight is not one of them. Leverage what you learned to help manage your weight. I actually am struggling to stop losing at this point having reached my goal in the spring. There are tricks that you learn to deal with the hot flashes which for me truly are the worst. They leave me soaked to the bone and then of course I get very cold. So I try to ensure that I do things to not trigger as many of them. I have a fan next to me in the living room and I sleep with a fan on in the bedroom. I try not to wear clothing that I know will make me warmer because just being overly warm will trigger one for me. I always have a light jacket with me because if I am not flashing I am freezing cold to the bone. Hopefully you will have little to no symptoms, you have certainly had enough stuff to deal with and you deserve a break. I will say prayers to help you through this. We will be thinking about you. Please keep us posted and reach out if you need anything.

@ You are doing fantastic but clearly you already know that. Obese family or friends are usually the ones that seem to be the most jealous a$$holes of all. It is because they are still in a place where they are ok living the way they are. Many are younger and have yet to have serious comorbitities but don't worry, their time will come. If I were you, I would use this as motivation to get to a healthy weight and stay there. This would be a good way to stick it right up their you know what. Do not let them take your power away in the future! They are not worth your time. Good luck on continuing success!

I love the idea of a vets only restricted. Time post op makes a lot of sense. Nice work!

How very scary! I hope that everything gets better quickly and they figure out what the heck is going on. I have not heard of this happening before.

I can honestly say I thought the drinking and eating thing would be the hardest to deal with but the truth is, it is the easiest for me. I drink tons and tons of Water all day long so I am well hydrated. When I eat it does not bother me at all. I can say for me maintenance has been the hardest for me. I simply cannot find a place where I am neither gaining or losing. This is complicated by the fact that I have been on a lot of medications that caused me to gain some weight. I have been weaning off of them now and the weight is flying off and I seriously don't want it to at this point. I am comfortable where I am and like the way I look and I definately do not want to have to purge my clothing yet again. I have finally built up enough of a wardrobe to feel decent about it. Lately I have been losing weight rapidly again for me having lost nearly 10lbs in the last 3 weeks. That was following a gain of 4lbs about 8 weeks ago. I have even added some good carbs back in and my carb count is now higher than my Protein count and yet I am losing weight. Yesterday I ate more than I ever have and I hopped on the scale and lost 1/2 pound again yesterday. I had about 1700 calories which is really hard for me to do. For me, this has been the hardest part.

I will say I started out telling anyone who asked and that worked just fine for me. Especially if the person asking was overweight or obese themselves. I did this mostly because I really wanted others to realize that having WLS is not as scary as it sounds. I will say over time (I am 21 months post op), I have changed that approach a little. I assess the person asking me. If I get the feeling they are just being nosy I share that I follow a high Protein low carb diet, I exercise as much as possible and I track everything I eat. This is the truth, sometimes I simply choose not to add that I have add some surgery to help me be successful. The reason I have changed this approach is because I have learned that this really is more about my behaviors at this point than it is about the surgery. Having had to work my behind off to get this far, i feel like the bypass is just there in the background helping me along and it is none of any bodies business. Before I knew better I believed it really was the surgery that was creating my success. Now, I know that is 90% me and 10% the tool. That is because I can eat anything I want, I can eat around my surgery if I choose to, I can decide not to exercise and I will gain my weight back. So nearly 2 years post op, I have to work at this every single day. Not sure if that makes sense to others but it does to me.

@@mreckner I had RNY 21 months ago. I was a mess! High blood pressure, high cholesterol, severe gerd, sleep apnea, anemia, diabetes and stage 3 kidney disease. I also had arthritis of the knees, ankles, spine, shoulders. As soon as the weight started coming off the pain in my feet and knees disappeared! So did all of those nasty comorbitities! I am still struggling with the damage to my spine and shoulders which is permanent and won't get better with time. I tell you this because you have young children which likely means you are young. If I regret anything it is waiting until I was 51 to bite the bullet and have this surgery. I missed out on so much but worse yet, the damage to my spine continued to get worse. I literally weigh a little more than half what I used to at 159. My highest weight was 315. It is the best thing I ever did for myself! Everything will be fine if you do what they tell you to. You have a whole support team here behind you.

Yes......I defiantly have problems with this. Last week I had an episode and because I am coming off some medications thought it was from that. Before I realized that my sugar was too low, I was in a very confused state, home alone, shaking like a leaf. For one second my brain thought maybe this is actually your sugar. I took it and it was 47! That was the lowest it ever has been. Why it happened that day I don't understand. For me it happens when I choose to have oatmeal or cream of wheat for Breakfast. I know that I need to make sure I have a mid morning snack heavy on the Protein followed by a heavy protein lunch. If I do that, I don't get it. This particular day I was very focused on high protein low carb. I simply do not know why it happened that day but when it does it is scary how fast you crash and how confused I become. I have been told by my Bariatrician that it is best to really stay away from carbs in general. The problem for me with that is I am in maintenance and having a difficult time to stabilize. I am supposed to be maintaining and have lost 8lbs in the last 3 weeks. I also contribute that to some of the medications I was taking that I am no longer taking. I think this could be a vicious circle for me. I am now 159, strarting to move toward the lower end of the BMI scale and honestly feeling too thin at this point. If I lose below 155 I am going to get really nervous......

There was a post earlier this week using these exact stats. At least we know where it is coming from now. It makes sense that in the super morbidly obese category. Not sure where you currently sit in terms of size but this would certainly be a great starter question when you meet your surgeon. I would follow up with asking him/her what his/her mortality rate is. When you ask the surgeon they are usually pretty good about sharing the details of any death they might have had as well. I would also venture to guess that staying over 600lbs and not having surgery has a higher death rate even yet. This is just a guess....given everything we know and have learned. If anyone has that mortality rate it might put things into perspective for people considering but struggling because they are afraid of the surgical death rate. I was morbidly obese weighing 310lbs and sick as a dog. I honestly would have made this decision even if the mortality rate was 1 in 50 but again that is me. I wanted to be here long term for my children and grandchildren. Best of luck to you!

Really, you are frustrated already? LOL... Your body has lost 16lbs already! That is really great! You have to be patient with this process. You did not gain it overnight and you won't lose it that way either. There will be many many stalls over the period you lose. As you get closer to your goal it will really slow down so you have to be patient and stay off the scale if it is going to freak you out so quickly. Your body has to take breaks in between losing, just stick to the plan and your weight will come off. The first stall happens around week 3. You are right on track. Best of luck!

My father N Law is the worst food pusher of them all. It's weird because I see him every Sunday and sometimes in between. He is always looking at me weird and telling me how pretty I look now that I am thin. Then comes the, do you want a piece of cake or he is always pushing butter pecan ice cream on me. Of course I never take it and no matter how many times my hubby and I tell him that ice cream gives me a tummy ache, he still does it. Many times badly enough to put it in a bowl and hand it to me. I just don't understand why someone does that? Then he will say things like, I am so sad that you can't have ice cream. "That's just terrible, it's a shame....." I always respond by saying I honestly dont even care about ice cream. I would rather eat some fresh strawberries or cherries or steak! LOL. He just doesn't understand and I am certain it has to do with his age. He thinks that I completely screwed up the rest of my life. It's too funny because I am thrilled with how I look, how I feel and that food no longer has a hold on me. I simply eat to live, not live to eat like before.