Mrs. Reid

@@kimpossible67 I know that your intentions are good trying to get people to as you put it "return to normal", but you have to understand that you're dealing with grown folks here and as much as you would like for the conversation to be different, you cannot control it. If I were you I would just move on to something else and let these people do whatever they want to do. You'll keep a lot more of your hair by not worrying about it.

@@LipstickLady PREACH!!!!

You're wrong.
Do you expect men who use Viagra to tell people they have a little help in the boudoir or are they lying?
Do you expect parents with fertility problems to let others know they used artificial insemination or is that also a lie?
Perhaps women who are complimented on their figure should let the world know they've had a boob job, or you know, they are lying.
Transgender people should give full disclosure instead of trying to live a normal life, because they really SHOULD be fighting that stigma. Or you know, they are lying, too.
Whatever. Judge me as a liar all you want for not telling everyone who asks about my weight loss surgery. It's actually people like you that prevent me from wanting to do so. So thanks. After all, you ARE the expert at this, right?

I think that the people on this board who insist that their way is the only true way...and make rude and shaming comments to others who do not share their point of view should be flagged. This forum is about SUPPORT! It's not about projecting your own attitudes on other people.

When I went to my Shrink's appointment I put the cards on the table before we even got started.
I told him, " I'm paying you for this session so that I can get my sleeve surgery. If you have any reservations or considerations that would cause you to not recommend me for the surgery.... tell me now and I will cancel the appointment and go elsewhere. - I AM GETTING THIS SURGERY!! So tell me what you need to approve this and let's wrap this up. Do we understand each other.? "
He said no problem and we continued with the session and all went well. Not that I suggest anyone else should do this.....just saying nothing was going to stop me, especially someone I am paying.

I think that the people on this board who insist that their way is the only true way...and make rude and shaming comments to others who do not share their point of view should be flagged. This forum is about SUPPORT! It's not about projecting your own attitudes on other people.

I guess I don't understand... if you want to save the world.. then why are you pointing out people and their flaws? Being bullied into other's way of thinking and depression is just as hard a struggle as people that are overweight. So live and let live. Honestly if you wanted to help others so much, why be so hard core on telling them they are in denial and that they are wrong? One would think you would be happy for the other person in taking steps toward a better life. Which is what you did say you wanted.
Hearing the things you have to say and being so critical is EXACTLY why many of us keep things to ourselves. Because there is always someone to criticize a decision, regardless what it is...I can just see you at my job saying" She is trying to lie and act like she didn't go under the knife" WHO NEEDS THAT? It's no ones business what I do with my body. Period. I prefer to just be happy. This is supposed to be a SUPPORT group, so can we support other's decisions to do as they choose? Tell or don't tell... everyone is allowed to choose for themselves and I don't slight anyone regardless how they go about it.

An alcoholic or drug addict who has not admitted they have a problem is in "denial."
An obese person who surrendered to the fact that they needed help and got help in the form of surgery is not in denial.
This (surgery) is as real as life gets.

@@Stevehud Who am I you ask? I am someone who knows how to mind my own damn business and let other grown folks deal with their own issues.
Obviously something you know nothing about Mr. Save The World… You have fun with that!
Oh wait… hold up a second..., it all came to me just now… Who are you Stevehud? You're that lonely miserable guy who has nothing better to do in life but say stupid things to get attention because you can't get it any other way.
Sorry dude… You can't have my power like that!

Well now. You told me, didn't you?

OK… Just as Stevhud just said, if I offend you TOUGH, you'll get over it….
On that note @@Stevehud WHO DIED AND MADE YOU GOD??? What in the hell makes you think that you can save the world? Quite frankly, I'm not about to start and do not feel it is my responsibility to "educate" people on weigh loss, or anything associated with it. And just for the record, I'm not hiding a damn thing, nor am I ashamed of my decision to have surgery. My life and my body are just that MINE! I don't owe you or anyone else for that matter any explanation or justification for ANYTHING that I do or decide. THIS IS ABOUT ME!!! Not anyone else!
I do have empathy for everyone in this world that is overweight and struggling with the co-morbidities that come along with obesity, but I have struggles of my own and I'm not about to take on the thoughts, worries, and concerns of everybody else that is suffering just like I am and allow them to suck all the life out of me. Been there, done that, definitely not going on that vacation again!
It seems to me that its very easy for you to sit behind your computer screen and judge whether or not someone is telling a lie or hiding something. SERIOUSLY??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? You are certainly entitled to your opinion, just like everyone else is, but DO NOT sit in judgement of those that do not think like you, feel like you, or talk like you do. Because I choose to not tell everyone my personal business whether they ask me about it or not, does not make me a liar.
You have a very warped and twisted thought process (in my opinion). You come across very strongly as believing that you know everything and you are better than others which is definitely not a good look on you.
Get over yourself! You're no better than anyone else on these boards, and just entertain this thought for a moment… YOU JUST MIGHT BE WRONG!!!
And that's MY OPINION! Deal with it however you see fit.
And to anyone reading this who says that I sound and talk like a very mean person, that's cool and your opinion. You don't know me or anything about me and your approval is not warranted or encouraged.

I think that the people on this board who insist that their way is the only true way...and make rude and shaming comments to others who do not share their point of view should be flagged. This forum is about SUPPORT! It's not about projecting your own attitudes on other people.

@@LipstickLady Oh sistagirl, let the ENTIRE church say AMEN!!!

Not everyone "cares" about it and not everyone feels that way, either.
I'm not "hiding" anything, nor do I "worry" that someone might "find out".
Yeesh! Here we go again. <eyeroll>
IF YOU DON'T DO IT **MY WAY**, YOU ARE DISHONEST!!
It's amusing to me that the only judgmental people in my life about this surgery are those who are also WLS patients on a support board.
HA!

I am respectful of all three approaches - (1) tell everyone; (2) tell only certain people or groups of people; or (3) tell no one. We all have different life stories and our approach will be the one that works best for our individual needs.
We should be careful about attempting to box in a definition for "truth" when coupling that with someone's experiences - truth is relative and not always cut and dried.
I'm totally open with this surgery with family but not co-workers because I just don't want my personal business broadcasted over and over again. I work with some very gossipy and bitchy females and I just don't have time to deal with the drama, which I can assure you would raise its ugly head.

@kimpossible67 Unless I missed something, you didn't say anything to offend me.
@thesuse2000 I was slightly offended by your comment, and your apology is accepted However, this is a situation that we will have to agree to disagree on, and that's ok too!

@@jenbaby75 I feel ya on the clothes. I feel like I look horrible and know that I am not healthy. I am also on a 'new-clothes strike' as well! No use in buying expensive clothes that I hopefully will never need again. I have an entire wardrobe from sizes 16-22 to work through and when I get to the point of size 16 being baggy, I will reward myself with a couple new outfits!
We will get through this. January is almost here (2 more months!) and all of us are already on the road to wellness and health
Back to work on my timemachine so I can speed things up a bit....

@thesuse2000 You are totally entitled to your opinion, I just happen to totally disagree with you. I don't understand why you feel that I am not being honest because I'm not divulging every piece of information about what I'm doing. Nothing I said was untrue, but it sounds to me like if I don't give someone all the details that I'm telling a lie which to me is totally ridiculous.
You may not agree with the way others think and view things, but I would caution you about the way the words that you use come out. I'm not hear to judge you, but I don't take to kindly to being called a liar, and that's exactly how you came across.
And that's MY opinion!

Stay positive and let us know how it goes!

Oh,what a wonderful attitude to have. I too am in the process of saying goodbye to my toxic relationship with food. I can totally relate to what you are saying. I don't have a date yet, but like you I am already focusing on the new life I will be leading. I too intend to ROCK my sleeve! Congratulations and best wishes for your surgery and recovery!

Oh,what a wonderful attitude to have. I too am in the process of saying goodbye to my toxic relationship with food. I can totally relate to what you are saying. I don't have a date yet, but like you I am already focusing on the new life I will be leading. I too intend to ROCK my sleeve! Congratulations and best wishes for your surgery and recovery!

this morning i start my pre-op liquid diet. my surgeon requires 4 days only.
last night i had a very emotional evening. it's finally here! it's the moment i've been thinking about for over a year now -- the moment when i end my toxic relationship with food.< /p>
the months leading up to this have prepared me in every way to make this break, and yet i had some somber, tear-filled times throughout the night. i realize that, in time, i will be able to eat anything i want to again, albeit in tiny quantities... but never again will i gorge mindlessly to give myself pleasure, to assuage negative emotions, to fill empty hours. no more will the most constant and dependable "friend" be able to numb me from feeling and dealing with life. i'm giving up the temporary good feelings that food gave me, because they were temporary, and masked the damage that overeating caused to my health and well being. goodbye, my life-long toxic friend! i happily kick you out the door and slam it behind you!
i had my food funerals in the last few weeks, and found them surprisingly very unsatisfying. none of my favorites gave me the same thrill or momentary sense of peace that i had always counted on before. i just wasn't that into what i was eating. and my new habits of eating slower and consciously made it difficult and even unpleasant to finish the food in front of me. i felt simultaneously pleased at the progress i've made, knowing that the gradual changes to my diet have caused my tastes to change, and saddened, as i would feel at the loss of a friend.
right now, all i feel is happiness. i'm so proud to have found the strength to go through this difficult process. i've got my eyes firmly fixed on the prize at the end of the journey -- getting off of blood pressure and cholesterol medications, regaining the ability to be physically active, enjoying getting dressed in the funky outfits i prefer, keeping up with the wonderfully supportive man in my life, frolicking with the grandchildren i expect my daughter will provide me, traveling freely and comfortably around the world, and finally gaining some semblance of control over the one area of my life that has always confounded me in the past.
i've followed so many of you closely through your own journeys, and it has helped me tremendously. i'm ready. i really am! thank you for sharing your experiences. i plan on doing the same.
i'm counting the hours until 7:45 am EST on 11/18/14. i am so going to rock my sleeve!

I had been thinking about buying a pair of pants in my goal size. I thought maybe that was not a good thing to do. Maybe I should do it

I had been thinking about buying a pair of pants in my goal size. I thought maybe that was not a good thing to do. Maybe I should do it

First and foremost, I am cold as a mothafookah! ALL THE TIME.

I am wearing jeans when most people are wearing shorts. I always have a tank top on under my sweater and am usually wearing fleece leggings under my pants. As a fatty, I never ever wore a coat unless I was skiing and now, not only do I wear one, but I carry a spare if I am going in to my kids' schools to use as a blanket.

I keep my house at 74 and I turn on the fireplace when I am downstairs. I set my car thermostat at 88 and can hardly bear to get out of my car and go into stores. The grocery, which is always colder than any other place including Antarctica, has me scurrying through as quickly as possible and shaking uncontrollably by the time I am out of there.
I sleep in wool socks, fleece leggings, a tank and a long sleeve tshirt. I wrap myself in a wool blanket and then get under the sheet, fleece blanket, down comforter and regular comforter. (Husband is pretty sure he's not getting any action until summer. He's probably right.)

I am cold cold cold cold cold and it's 45 degrees outside. I am probably not going to survive when it hits the teens.

Second is something I just figured out last night. I can no longer have a glass of milk with my brownie/muffin/cake. Yeah, yeah, I know. I am not supposed to be eating those things, but I had the sleeve so I could live a relatively normal life post op. I have a slight stricture so I am forced to follow the no drinking for an hour after eating rule or I will vomit. I don't like it, but I've leaned to live with it after 18 months.
Last night I ate half of the best chocolate chip muffin I've ever had. I wanted a glass of milk SO bad, I couldn't resist. I poured about two inches and it was so delicious, I chugged it. The milk and the muffin revisited. Quickly. I barely made it to the bathroom. Ugh.


SO YES. I found two things I hate about my sleeve. That said, there are so many HUGE things I love about it, I don't regret it for a minute. I can bundle up, I can wait on the milk. I can't imagine ever going back to where I was. I am thrilled about my decision despite these two stupid little things and I am so happy I had surgery. SO HAPPY.