Thinjen

O.K. so she leaves us. This makes us bored. We have to buy more of her products to take up the time that we used to spend on here. The product short circuits from all of the excessive use (It really didn't, just sounds like part of her devious plan). Anyway, check in to see if she's back. Only see a couple of lines, but see her signature that says slumber parties...which reminds us to order more. Stay away from the site a little longer to enjoy our products. See, it's a vicious cycle. Muhahahahahaha. So, when my last product came in, my husband says, "You ordered a new toy and you didn't tell me about it?" I said " I was going to tell you about it, when the time was right." He said "No you weren't." (I really wasn't.. it's between me and me.) I said "Fine. I'll send it back. (I know I can't and I really wouldn't anyway). " I'll just go back to using your electric toothbrush." I'm a simple girl from Arkansas. That is what is meant by oral sex, right?

Taking a break from.... Well, I didn't sign up for the insurance, but I really need it. The last time we bought adult movies, they were on VHS. They have them on DVD now. (You can skip easily to your favorite scenes...this is a great time saver for a busy gal!!) Now, gotta go take out some insurance.

Ours can fall off?, gee I better slow it down. Thanks for the tip. Now, back to....

I'm sorry, Lisa, I didn't know you were gone. Not that I don't love you, I've just been, well, see, um, I got a package in the mail from you and um it keeps me busy 4-5 times a day and um, and um, well....I've not been on here as much. :clap2:

I love Taylor Hicks. He's so passionate about music. As for the chicks, I say the McPhee girl. First, I was for the Pickler girl, but I'm not buying her hard luck story. She was too animated about it in the first show. When she said, "Oh, I've got to write to my dad that is in prison"...and used her finger to motion writing and said and "call my grandad that I live with." We already heard her story, it was like she felt the need to reiterate it so that we wouldn't forget to vote for her because she was a pitiful underdog. Trust me, when you come from a really bad situation, you don't put it out there for 30 million people. Granted, some of you know how screwed up I am, but people that see me in person don't get to hear about it. Of course, if I wanted to use it for more votes on the show, I guess it's a good stunt. I use you guys as my shrinks. OK, back to therapy, now in 6th grade I....

I have heard all of this hubbub on other threads about how we should respect all of the docs that come on here. First, let me say... respect is earned- it does not come automatically with a title. I am still waiting to be banded, and I find the info from other bandsters is much more useful than info from a doctor that knows how to put one in and that's it. Now, if your doctor is banded, that's a different story. This is the reason I have a female gynecologist. You can read all day about the vagina, PMS, childbirth, menopause...but if you don't have the equipment yourself, you can't really understand. Men, don't talk to me about "mild" cramps....ye without a uterus should not speaketh to the issue. With you having a skinny doctor, it sounds like he doesn't have the "equipment". However, it does sound like he has a grasp on just how much of a mental element there is with the weight demon. Sign me up for a brain transplant, too.

I wonder if the OBGYN records that were submitted to insurance contain the notation "Morbidly obese female, gravida 2, para 2, FUPA." I asked my husband if he knew what FUPA was. He said, "You mean, the fat upper pussy area?" I didn't know what it was called, but he did. Why he didn't share with me, I don't know. I'm fully aware that my whole body is fat, I didn't think that area was granted immunity. I can't see it, but I'm sure it's fat. I can pinch a couple of inches.

I have FUPA. I was wondering what it was called. I'm still fighting insurance. Can I use that as a comorbidity?

Sorry just now getting back to you. He was 27 when I kicked him out. He had to sign a 10 page contract when he moved in, so there was no guessing as to what was allowed/not allowed in our house. (I'm in law school) We have kids here. I was raised around an alcoholic/crackhead, and my tolerance for the same is nonexistent. He is still a loser, and I suppose he is still doing the same stuff....just not in my house. I have NO functional drug addicts in my family. Everybody else had given my brother a chance to straighten out, he didn't want to be straight. It's very easy for a drug addict to manipulate others. They have a tendency to make others feel guilty about creating opposition for their lifestyle. They are pros at it. And as far as offering rehab...they have to want rehab. That is one thing that you cannot do for him. I agree that there a lots of people that are functional that smoke pot. I just don't know any of them. Like I said, all of the ones I know are either unemployed or steal stuff to get money to support their habit.

I've dealt with the same thing with my brother. He left that day. Of course, it would have been harder if he would have had a wife and kids. You have to do what is right for your family. Sounds like he needs a wake up call. He gave no regard to you, your husband, your kids...totally disrespectful. That's what I considered when I kicked my brother out.

Wacky. This isn's some dude...it's Richard Gere.

We have this guy in law school that surfs porn during class. He sits on the front row and all of us behind him can see his computer. Anyway, I think it excites him that all of us are watching him watching them. Anyway, us chicks have decided that if he can do that during class, then we should be able to wear fun panties to school. That would even make agency fun.

Kare, I'm taking that as a personal challenge. I, thinjen, promise to post at least one funny thing each month. And if I can't come up with anything, I'll just cut and paste the Jimmy Hoffa comment. I use humor to mask my sad, pathetic life....I've got a million of them.

Hey, I say, Good day to be a hamster.

Interesting poll topic.. I'd be interested in finding out just how many women have a vagina. I don't think that's been covered on another thread, but I'll do a search.

I should call my husband's unit, Jimmy Hoffa. Been a while since I've seen him.

Donali, How terrible!!! Did you ever get it out? Or, do you have a liver that quivers?

Well, this doesn't actually qualify for stuck but.... Everybody's been sick in my house. My 11 month old has an ear infection. They started him on antibiotics and it gives him diarrhea. So when he started with the runs yesterday, I wasn't sure if it was a stomach bug or a reaction to the antibiotics. Well, he started vomiting at 1:20 this am. Kept vomiting until 2:15am. Also had more diarrhea. Gave him some Water at 7:00am to see if he could keep it down....no. Took him to the doctor. Changed his diaper while we were there and guess what I find in his poop? A DIME!! I didn't tell the doc, because I was SO embarrased. Thankful, it could have lodged in his airway...Thank God it didn't. Thank God it didn't give him a bowel obstruction. They gave him a shot for nausea. Figured it wouldn't hurt since everybody else in this house if puking. So see, money is the root of all evil.

Update...Blue Cross/Blue Shield said no again. They are the DEVIL. I'm fighting them. They shouldn't mess with a depressed agoraphobic, what else do I have to do, but fight?

I don't trust anybody. I only trust God. And my money reminds me of that.

In my defense, I started the orifice thread out of a dare from Lisa. I know, I know, I should have been more mature than that...I should have waited on at least a double dare if not a triple dog dare you--but I gave in with only one dare. I tell everything I know on this site. I have no friends in the real world. I'm not looking for sympathy. Heck, I'm not even looking for friends. Right now, I'm just trying to find me. These are the only bunch of people that don't judge me based on my size...it's very liberating.

I don't have any fun stories to share. I've always told my husband that if certain things got stuck in certain places...I would just die with them in there, because when you go to the ER to have stuff removed...it's all over the hospital within the hour-screw confidentiality. Bob almost got stuck one time, but I was able to grab on to the cord and retrieve him. He didn't seem to mind. Me and DH stayed in this fancy hotel one time. After a session of playing, "So this is your first visit to the gynecologist." and me innocently saying Uh, huh. Well, we couldn't find the remote. It showed up the next day, but we joked that everytime I took a step, the channel would change. I've had a chicken bone stuck in my throat, and no I wasn't having sex with a chicken. I'm from Arkansas, but I have my limits. I've been constipated before....does that count?

Cynthia, You don't need a partner for that...you should contact Lisa (DeLarla). Bzzz Bzzz Bzzz. She can introduce you to Bob.

Thanks Kathy for the explanation of peanut butter. Lisa, I should have known better. The more I go up on my psych meds...the more I need them and me too. I think that people should do a search before they ask these questions that have been asked 10,000,000,000,000 times. New threads should only be started for new topics. Have we discussed what is the strangest thing that got stuck in any of your orifices? or is that worthy of a new thread?

Lisa, What? I don't get it. Jen