1Cor2:9

The first time that I can remember wanting to have WLS was when I was a teenager. I believe that was when I first saw a commercial for WLS. During my twenties I did not have the financial means to have the surgery. In the spring of 2013 I made the decision to have WLS. 2013 was the first year that certain factors came together that would allow me to have the surgery. At the time I wanted lap band because it was the only bariatric surgery I knew about. With that in mind I went to my new PCP and told her that I wanted to have lap band surgery and asked for a referral. Since I was fairly ignorant of how insurance worked at the time I just found a surgeon online and asked for a referral for him. Well this individual was not part of the medical group, so the referral was denied. One would have thought my PCP would have known that, but no matter. After that she gave me a referral for a surgeon. With my new referral in hand I set up my initial appointment with Dr. Lufti.
During my first appointment with Dr. Lufti he explained why he thought VSG would be a better option for me. At the time I was nervous about the permanent removal of part of my stomach. However, after some research and reflection I decided that perhaps he was right and decided to have VGS instead of lap band. While I was completing the requirements for surgery my PCP moved her office to the suburbs and as a carless human being I realized it would be hard for me to travel to her new location, so I selected another PCP. What I did not know is that I had to select a PCP that was in the same medical group as Dr. Lufti. Anyways, December 2013 rolls around and I am preparing for surgery. I wanted to have surgery the week leading up to winter break to conserve sick days. The day before I am scheduled to have surgery I am told that the surgery was denied because Dr. Lufti was not in the same medical group I was a part of. I cannot fully describe the disappointment I felt. I did everything I was told to do, but still I could not have the surgery.
In January of 2014 I decided to continue the good fight. I switch my PCP again. Not just because she was not in the same medical group as my surgeon, but I did not like the care I received from her. Made an appointment with my new PCP. She was really in support of me having surgery. However, she was also not in the same medical group with my surgeon. The reason I wanted to stay with Dr. Lufti was that I really liked the team in his office and I firmly believed I would receive the care I needed. Now I will say, if I remember correctly I thought I look online to see if PCP number 3 was in the same medical group as my surgeon, but for some reason BCBS said differently than what I found online. At this point, I'm mad as a big dog about things. I called everybody and they mama to get to the bottom of things. I after many attempts I was finally in the right medical group, but BCBSIL at the time had a requirement that anyone wanting WLS had to wait twelve months...
I continued to press on because I sincerely thought that the Lord wanted me to have this surgery and all I need to do was persevere. Twelve months pass. During that time I switch from BCBS HMO to BCBS PPO because I thought it would make things easier for me to have surgery. So I made an appointment with PCP number 4 and got a referral. I went to my appointment at my surgeon's office and learned that my school district, I am a teacher, did not want to cover any bariatric surgery with PPO policies. I left his office thinking, "That is okay you are going to have this surgery." I did make an attempt to change my insurance back, but that was taking a really long time. While waiting for this amendment to be made I seriously contemplated buy my own insurance as a means to have the surgery.
I left my previous school district during the summer of 2015. When I got hired for my new position with a different school district I knew that I selected my new insurance I was going to have BCBSIL HMO and select the same PCP so that I could be in the medical group as my surgeon. Less than a week after my insurance became active I scheduled an appointment with my PCP and Lufti. Shortly there after I started completing the requirements for surgery. On Dec. 16th I two year fight, if not lifelong, had come to an end. I got sleeved. Because what I went through it took sometime for me to believe it was going to happen. Even when I was told I was approved I still had some doubt. Even after I woke up from anesthesia I did not fully believe. In fact, one of the first questions I asked when I woke up was, "Did I have surgery?" When I came home from the hospital the next day it was still hard to believe. It actually took me see my incisions for me to accept that I had surgery.
I am sharing this story with you because I want you to know that if the Lord wants you to have surgery it will come to past. The fight to a better you is going to be a hard and long one, but it is worth fight. This fight is one only you can contend with. No one else can fight it for you. I am three weeks out roughly 40 lbs down and I am fight too. Someone even told me that maybe God did not want me to have the surgery because of the obstacles, but I knew otherwise. To all that read this no matter if you are an expect, recently got sleeved, or thinking about it keep fighting.

Presently a lovely 236! A lose of nine pounds.

On Dec. 16, 2016 I was sleeved after fighting for it for more than two years. When time came my insurance covered all the cost. I had support and so on.
Presently I am close to being 70lbs down. I feel much stronger. Through exercise I am having more energy to tackle my day.
I am saying all this because I realize one truth-- God alone enabled me to even begin this journey. There are many in our country and elsewhere whom could even dare to dream to have such an opportunity. I am very thankful for His mercy and grace in this situation. He could have seen my situation and left me in it, but He deemed otherwise was best for me.
There is this old Winan song "Millions". The chorus goes, "millions didn't make it, but I am one of the ones who did." Now this song is not talking about salvation and not WLS, but think the truth still applies. God doing a work that only He can do. If you are interested the link to the video is below.
https://youtu.be/lAYlzprgzJQ

On Dec. 16, 2016 I was sleeved after fighting for it for more than two years. When time came my insurance covered all the cost. I had support and so on.
Presently I am close to being 70lbs down. I feel much stronger. Through exercise I am having more energy to tackle my day.
I am saying all this because I realize one truth-- God alone enabled me to even begin this journey. There are many in our country and elsewhere whom could even dare to dream to have such an opportunity. I am very thankful for His mercy and grace in this situation. He could have seen my situation and left me in it, but He deemed otherwise was best for me.
There is this old Winan song "Millions". The chorus goes, "millions didn't make it, but I am one of the ones who did." Now this song is not talking about salvation and not WLS, but think the truth still applies. God doing a work that only He can do. If you are interested the link to the video is below.
https://youtu.be/lAYlzprgzJQ

Do you have a counselor or therapist?
This is a big change physically, mentally, and emotionally.
If you have been used to managing your feelings and moods, depression and anxiety with food you have got to learn some new, healthy ways to cope.
Please find a counselor or therapist to talk to.
See if you can find a bariatric support group and/or 12-step recovery group like OA (OA.org).
Follow your program.
In the meantime, try taking a walk and getting some sunshine.
I also recommend that you read a book like Eat it Up! by Connie Stapleton or When food is Love by Geneen Roth.
You will get through this, and it is ok to cry.
Please keep us posted on how you are doing.

Presently a lovely 236! A lose of nine pounds.

I was never part of that movement or culture. I don't believe it is possible to be obese and healthy for an extended period of time. It will catch up with you eventually.
That said, I don't believe in treating people badly, shaming them, stereotyping them, or discriminating against them based on body size or composition. I think that is terrible behavior.
I also don't think that a health care professional telling an obese person that they need to lose weight is "shaming" -- but everyone else needs to STFU.

I am wondering what some of you may think about the Fat Acceptance movement along with the FA, fat admirer, subculture. Were once a part of the the movement? If so what made you decide to get sleeved? Were you ever in a FA type relationship? For myself, I have not participated in either. I suppose the one aspect of the Fat Acceptance movement that I would agree with that is that people should not be mistreated or discriminated against because of their size. I am not sure about the rest. Although I have been sleeved I still affirm that beauty comes in all sizes and shapes. If you share your thoughts I will read them.

243. I need to see what I can to increase my weight loss. A loss is better than a gain, but still. Thanks!

I hope at least one person got a laugh out of the title. This post mentions God. Please do not read if you do not want to read about God.
Someone today informed me that they wished I would stop mentioning God in all my post. This post is to explain why I often mention God in my post. Before I begin all humans that have grace this earth or will are in some way shape or form a hypocrite. Sadly it is part of the human condition. So I will admit that in some areas of my life that word would be fitting.
My BP name is 1 Cor. 2:9. First Corinthians 2:9 states
“Eye has not seen, nor ear heard,
Nor have entered into the heart of man
The things which God has prepared for those who love Him"
Through the gift of my surgery God is going to bring about something new and He is has already started that work. I am not going to lose weight because of surgery, exercise, or even diet but through the work He is going to do in my life. I have been heavy since a child. My fat is so old it expired! ha So when God does the necessary work to do away with all that weight it is certainly going to be a new thing. My mentioning the Lord in my post is not an attempt to be perfect or to sound perfect, but to be honest about who I am and and the work that is taking place in my life. I am very much thankful for this opportunity. I got my rough Patches and spot, but I am still very grateful. He did not have to make a way for me to have surgery, but He did. I so I am going to smear Him on many of my post.
God not only is a part of this journey, but He is the one has made it possible to start and will bring it to its conclusion.

I like your viewpoint of how God has provided this opportunity and that he has plans to use it for his glory. Amen!
I also have a deep Christian worldview and I definitely express that in all types of interactions. I am not ashamed of that. I'm also not trying to make anyone else believe or do anything. The choice to be a follower ofJesus or not is up to each individual.
I hope we get some more people on this forum because I know that it is only through Jesus that I will be able to make this journey, no matter the outcome. And I would personally like to be able to give and receive all the spiritual support possible.
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Presently, I am ten weeks post op. During this whole process I have lost sixty pounds. This seems like a lot and yet not at the same time. I did not have any major complication in the hospital or since. I did have one incision that took several weeks to close. I would love to have lost 100 lbs in the first six months, but if not I know any loss is a gain. I, like many others, have started to have Hair loss as a result of my surgery. I have mixed feelings about that. On one hand, it could be worse and I have not lost any locs. However, I do not like how things look. I hope the hair returns quickly rather than slowly. But one does not have control over that. I have not experienced any regret over having surgery. I still wonder from time to time if I am going to make it. Having said that I have not given up. Anytime a person has a long term goal there will be concerns about if success will happen in the end. The things I have noticed that have improved are I have less pain in my right knee (I had surgery on my left knee twice as a child, so it is by default weaker), I use my asthma medication less, I do not feel like I am going to die when I walk up stairs, I feel I can move my body much faster than before, I save money on grocery shopping, and so on. People ask me about food temptations and to be honest they are not that bad. I can bake a cake for someone's birthday and not be tempted. I can be around people eating all kinds of unhealthy things and not be concerned. Most of my head hunger does not linger and I quickly disregard it. I think it was helpful that I took the time to learn about head hunger and emotional eating before surgery. I also gave up sweets and junk food before my liquid diet and I think the practice has been helpful. Besides eating now is no longer fun, so the lost of the fun factor has helped as well. I have 45 more pounds to go before I hit 200. I am interested to see how my body will be at that time. How will I look? How will I feel? Well, I have to get ready to meet up with a friend, but I wanted to share, if even a little, about how things are going for me.

Hello, I am in! My starting weight is 245. My goal is 230. Thanks!!!

I have read that in order for an obese individual to lose weight they must exercise at 250 minutes per week. So if you are exercising less than 50 minutes a day it may not be enough. Unless you have recently switched to a new exercise routine then you may need to ease into at first. You may want to increase you exercise time and see if that helps. Hang in there you are going to make it! It may not seem like it, but in time it will.

I personally think it is horrible for people to judge others when they have been in the same situation previously. There is a term for that and it is called HYPOCRITE.
I don't like someone judging me based on what I look like and I would not do it to someone else. Even watching "My 600 lb Life" I never wonder how someone could get that big because the fact is I could have been that very person.
Does that mean these people don't need some help? No, it doesn't but you help these people if they ask for help. I would never assume they want to change and impose myself upon them when they are not at the point of wanting to make a change. Also, I don't think one should assume when they see a obese/morbidly obese person they don't want to make a change. Maybe they really want to have surgery and their insurance doesn't cover it and they have no resources to self pay. Maybe they are a single parent who has no support/family to watch their kids while they do all the preop work and have the surgery. I could go on and on.....

I agree, but I can also say for myself that the things that tend to disgust me about people usually not their physical appearance. I imagine that will continue. I am not judging my surgery buddy I just do not agree. I live in Chicago and take public transit. I see all kinds of people on a regular basis and usually when I see people that leave me wanting it is because of how they treat others. I do not see people judging others. Besides I am in the 240s I still got plenty of fat, so what right would I have to look on another with disdain? Again I am not looking down on those who are passing judgment or on those that society would deem worthy of judging. I'm just saying I do not feel that way and I hope that I do not.

I had a conversation with my surgery buddy in which she said that when she now sees larger people, larger meaning bigger than herself, she feels disgusted. She asked me if I feel the same and I replied no. When I see people who are bigger than me I feel sorry for them and at the same time thankful that the Lord gave me the opportunity for change.
The formally fat, losing the fat, fat shaming other fat people? It seems a sad lot to me.When I am get to 150 lbs I am still going to be a fat person. One of my goals as I am on this journey is to not judge others along the way.
What are you thoughts about this? Is it fitting to treat people who are big with disdain as we lose ours?

No problem. I apologize for my poor word choice. I am good. I am somebody regardless of what my body may or may not look like. I thank you for the concern. Hey, my period was on its way I was feeling a little tender emotionally. lol!

Perhaps disappointed would have been a better word. I did not feel unworthy of love or any of the rest that you posted. I like to exercise a certain number of days a week and when I had not done that I was not happy about it.

Thank you. It is hard to envision something that one has never seen. I have been have since the age of 6. That means I have been heavy for almost 30 years and way more than half my life. So I am with you I think it is a natural insecurity. However, I press on because I have not finished this race. We are going to make. Even when I have that thought I do not give up.

1Cor2:9,
Thank you for being brave enough to share your struggles. I have the same secret fear. I am having my surgery next month, and my worst fear is that I will not change and it will not work, like all the other times I've tried to lose weight. Even though people tell me it is life changing, there is still that tiny part of me inside that doesn't believe.
As a fellow teacher, I know how demanding work can be. Let me tell you, if you are exhausted after running around on field trips and assemblies, I'd say you got your exercise in.
I understand how easy it is to focus on the things I DON'T do, instead of remembering the blessings and triumphs. I read 1 Corinthians 2:9, and it gives me hope. I hope it does for you as well. Good things are coming, so good that we cannot fathom! In the meantime, rejoice in His blessings, that your food was on point, and that you made it through the week!

Shame is a painful, social emotion that can be seen as resulting "...from comparison of the self's action with the self's standards.
This is an edit of the original post. Based on the above definition shame is a fitting word to use for this post. Other associations that one may have with the word shame is not my doing.
May I also add I did in fact end this post with a sense of hope for future progress that I think people seemed to over look. Admitting that I had a feeling of shame for a few days does not mean that I am suffering from low self esteem. Nor does it mean that I am always feel shame. People whom attempted to advise, well fine people I was not looking for tips or steps or guidance on how to change my emotional state because I knew that was going to change. Sometimes we do not give others the right to feel as they do. If one feels some sort of negative emotion we have to find ways to eradicate it right away in stead of wrestling with the emotion to have a better understanding of self. Also, the idea that I or anyone else should not have goals as it relates to weight loss is nonsense. Did not embark on this WLS journey with a goal in mind? Huh, am I wrong? We all have goals here. They may not be the exact goal, but still. No one had WLS with the goal of, "Well I would like to have major surgery to keep my body exactly the same." Come on now! With all that said, read on. Leave advise if you want. Please know it is not needed or wanted, but hey you do you.
This past work week has been overly exhausted. This week I had two assemblies and a field trip. One of these events alone is stressful, but both did me in. I only exercised once this week. I feel really bad about that. I suppose a better word for it is ashamed. I have this secret fear that I will never make my goal weight. That my work will just be in vain. My eating has been as it should.
I have to evaluate what happened to me this week. Two things happened this week and both are not encouraging. I realized last weekend I was not going to successful at my challenge I set for the Valentine's Day challenge. I also have this fear of not being successful. I have lost more than fifty lbs, but I keep thinking what if this is it. As a person who has "old fat", I have been over weight/obese since my youth, perhaps this is all my body will know. So I guess I gave up this week in some ways.
However, when one fails at one goal then one just needs to make another goal. Next week I will do better. I have to think of a game plan. Next week we not be a week of shame.

I weighed myself this morning and I was 247. Not exactly my goal, but any loss is a gain. Maybe I will be somewhere in the 230's by the end of the month. To everyone that worked hard over the last few weeks keep it up. We are going to make it.

I don't think you are alone in finding it hard to believe that "it" will really happen. I have been overweight since high school and although the math alone proves we will drop the weight, it still seemed hard to believe in the beginning.
I am 4 months out now and somewhere around the 2 month time frame I decided that this was my new life and started treating myself like the person I wanted to be. I know that sounds weird, but I realized that at times I didn't treat myself to well in the past. Manicures, pedicures, fresh haircut and of course that is about the time clothes started to get fun again. My point is that when I started doing that it really took some of the focus off of what had become an obsession for me .... what did I lose today?
It is just so much more than that. I know you will find that moment too. Good luck on your journey!

I thank you for this. I think it is normal to ponder and wonder if some can be achieved that has never been achieved. I agree with you that the way in which to contend with the doubt is to press on. The more we fight for a better body and so on I can and will diminish the voice that is saying, but "what if you do not make it?" I am glad you do not see me as a martyr I was not trying to even suggest I was. I think in our society women are groomed to not express or even have negative feelings. We are supposed to be upbeat and what not. If one of us opens ups and says something otherwise we bash her. I guess she has low self esteem or she trying to hold on to the shame. Last week was rough, but it was not the roughest I have faced or will face. I was ashamed, or rather disappointed, that I did not do as well as I wanted that's okay if God gives me another week to live then I can turn that boat around. Sometimes in life one is struck down, but that does not mean they are destroyed. I applaud you for not giving up! We are going to make it.