Miss Mac

Every now and then I switch out my signature at the bottom of my posts. When I came across this quote by Thomas Edison, I immediately thought of our struggles with stalls. Here is my new signature for a while: Here is how I feel about all the different things we do to break stalls: "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." Thomas Edison

1. Why would you love someone who treats you that way? 2. Why are you still there? 3. Watch the movie "Mother May I sleep With Danger" (with Tori Spelling) 4. Watch the movie "sleeping with the Enemy" (with Julia Roberts) 5. Read "Controlling People" (by Patricia Evans) and anything else by Patricia Evans You can order used books from Amazon, most at crazy reduced prices that come from Goodwill or are discards from libraries. I recently bought a book for one cent plus the standard $3.99 postage. I left a psycho-s**t head who was so controlling that I could not even take a local university course because he felt that he would have to sit out in the car and wait on me. Sounds like your fella wants you exclusively, but he doesn't want to be exclusive. Consider what's in it for you, and what's in it for him. I betcha the data falls strongly in his favor. Also, read anything on the cycle of abuse. Even if he is not hitting you, emotional abuse is still abuse. He is using you to meet his needs, but he is not giving anything back. You have clearly described a one-sided relationship. Run away as fast as you can, and don't look back.

Follow whatever your bariatric team told you. For myself, I started out with 1/3 of my Protein item (about an ounce if solid, like chicken breast) and 2 tablespoons of steamed veggie, and if I had room, 1/2 serving of fruit. Now that I am eight months out, I can comfortably eat 1/2 cup (or 2 ounces solid protein) and a little bit of veggie, like a few green Beans or couple of sprigs of steamed broccoli. Maybe at bedtime I will have 1/2 cup of yogurt with some berries. In between all of that, I am sipping all day. If I haven't met my protein goals the previous day, I will start my day with a Protein shake

Here is one of those instances where we are obligated to suggest that you call your bariatric team and ask them. That being said, I had that off-taste which went away when I completed some of my post-op meds.

You take this nice nap and then they wake you up and keep you in recovery long enough to determine if you will be o k enough to be taken to your room. I did not have the gas pains either, but boy was I thirsty. Take Chapstick. You will need it until they let you start sipping Water. My pain was not bad at all until the morphine wore off, and then it was only my biggest incision for a couple of days. They will probably give you more fluids than you can drink, but make the best of it. I took books, puzzles, and music, but mostly just slept. When I got home, I think I was only using hydrocodone just to help me get through the night for a couple of nights. Get up and walk about as soon as you can. When you get home, it will help to sleep elevated in your bed or in a recliner for a few days, so that getting up on your feet won't pull on your tummy so much.

I will do a happy dance for you!

You mean I am not the only one? Yeah, not so hungry during the day - easy to get queasy, but at night when I ought to be sleeping, that's when I want to be awake and hungry...like I am on my old third shift schedule from when I was working. I even use a sleep mask to help darken the room, but even if I go to sleep at 10pm, I will wake up an hour later and be awake most of the night. I try not to eat to the point of damage, but like last night I had 1/2 cup of yogurt with 1/4 cup of blueberries. And I keep sugar-free Jello in the fridge. Also, I stay away from bananas anytime after lunch, and go for things like a boiled egg. I keep a few of those on hand for hunger attacks. Seems like at night I can eat the things that would make me queasy during the day. I don't get it. I track my calories and am still keeping it around 800, and am pushing myself for 100 ounces of Water and 100 grams of Protein, but still, I seem to be on an inverted schedule. It's crazy.

Is this the only bariatric surgeon in your area that your insurance will cover? If your insurance has other providers, you should probably check around on some others....Maybe at a teaching hospital. My surgeon developed the bariatric program at the Cleveland Clinic, and then came to the Loyola University Medical Center, where my primary had referred me. He developed the bariatric program at Loyola and teaches both bariatric and robotic surgery. By all means, look for someone with positive credentials and plenty of experience in bariatric medicine. Could your primary physician recommend someone else?

I had read on here about shoulder gas being caused by the residual CO2 rising up to the shoulder area. I asked my surgeon at my final pre-op visit how he manages the shoulder gas, and he said he will extract as much as possible. I was so glad I asked, because I did not have that problem at all. Your doctor may look at you with the side eye, but it's worth asking. I agree with the recliner suggestion. Because of spinal issues, I have one of those lifting recliners...oh so handy. The only postop pain I had was from the largest incision, and using the recliner helped to reduce opportunities to pull on it. Since I am retired, I did not have to worry about going back to work or having toddlers around the house. But I will tell you that for the first couple of weeks, I did tire very easily. I would be puttering along and then suddenly hit the wall. I was on full liquids the first week home, and then on purees the second week. I tried baby food, but it was easier and cheaper to just put a meal in the blender with some broth and make my own. The third week I was able to move on to soft foods, and by the end of the fourth week I was allowed to have solid food. So yeah, take a week minimum, but I would recommend two, just to get your bearings and see how your recovery is going to go. For sure, Water is just weird post-op. It needs to be infused with Crystal Lite, or Gatorade or Vitamin Water or something. Good luck with your surgery. let us know how it goes.

Is more...600, 800, 1000 calories.....?

My experience was similar, mid back around the left under my arm into my ribs, also covered part of my upper arm. This was not long after a knee replacement. It hurt like hell long after the rash was gone. I had some dark days where I just wanted to walk off a cliff on into a swamp to end the pain. I cannot imagine feeling like that and going into a bariatric surgery which requires such intense work post-op to keep up nutrition. I feel for you. You may indeed want to postpone for a bit until you feel better.

Before you spend any money, go to www.marksdailyapple.com (Mark's Daily Apple) and see if their approach to body weight work outs might be a suitable option for someone who would just as soon spare the cash for something else. Just a thought.....

I was cleared for whole foods at 4 1/2 weeks, but waited until two months to try some things. I could have chili from the start, and even salsa, but if I eat a fresh tomato, I have to peel the skin off. I can eat broccoli, but cauliflower left me in miserable discomfort for over four hours. I have not tried it since. I can pretty much eat any kind of meat I want, so long as it is moist. Fish is hard for me to get past the taste buds, and I used to be a tuna salad freak.....loved the stuff. Filets have to be very moist. I have not even tried corn yet (8 months out) just because of the carbs. Cherries and berries are no problem, but I really have to watch quantity. sugar free Jello has to be my fruit substitute most of the time. I love watermelon, but it does not love me so much...I get bloated. Just today I had a cucumber/tomato/onion salad with my lunch, but no lettuce. I have tried fresh spinach, endive, iceberg, no happiness there it will be a long time before I try them again.

You will like it here. Except for the two days that I was at the hospital for my sleeve, I have checked in on the forum every day. It kinda grows on you.

You look like you are doing well. By the way, my feet shrunk, too.

Tell them that not only do you feel healthy, you are probably healthier than they are!

None. Too many carbs for me. Breakfast is usually an egg with bacon or leftover steak.

The best thing you can do is to be yourself, that way you know he likes you for yourself and does not expect you to be anything to the contrary. I agree that the third date means that he is definitely interested. Don't worry so much about does he like you. Let HIM worry about whether or not you like him. Like Steve Harvey says, you also should not give up your "cookie" too soon, even if you come to like him a lot. Make him earn it! That said, I think you should not hone in on one man too soon, although if he is charming and likeable, and you feel safe around him, by all means, go for date #4. In the mean-time, until he puts a ring on it, date like a man - a pair and a spare!

I agree with fezik23. My sisters, cousins, and myself have all had / are having bariatric surgery in our 50's and 60's after decades of misery with orthopedic conditions and other serious medical conditions brought on by obesity. When we were your age, bariatric surgery wasn't even available to the public. We have lost several family members of our generation to heart attacks in their late 30's and 40's and morbid obesity (300-400 lbs +) runs rampant throughout our clan. Good for you to address this now. Hopefully, your family will be supportive. If you cannot find strength there, you can find it here. You will surely have questions as you go through the different stages of your weight loss journey. We may at times, steer you right back to your bariatric team, but as people who have "been there, done that, got the shirt" we would love to share how our experiences may provide encouragement and support for you. Welcome to the forum. Feel comfortable to come visit often.

Last week I came across a thread from bodybuilding .com dated 4//23/2007 that addressed this same issue. A poster on that thread, PeteB claims from a previous article on bodybuilding.com he read "that 10 minutes of moderate cardio will purge about 50% of the accumulated lactic acid, and another ten minutes will purge 25% more." This was apparently suggested with the expectation that light easy cardio for a cool down will be sufficient - nothing aggressive. So....I went back and did not see a link to articles, and the science may have changed in seven years.......but food for thought and further investigation.

Glad to hear that you are doing better. Anytime you feel a lapse coming on, go to YouTube and watch a few videos with surgeons performing a sleeve gastrectomy. If you are a visual learner like me, it will remind you of what actually happened to your stomach while you were taking a nap. Your new tummy needs to be your new boss. Eventually, your taste buds will respond to what real foods (not made in a factory) taste like. Your body systems will respond with happiness for good natural nutrition. Look at it this way......before you take a bite or sip of something, ask yourself if you can pick it or catch it. For example, you will not find bagels hanging on a tree like you would cherries. You won't find rivers of soda pop flowing through a canyon. You can't go out to the garden and pick some fresh macaroni and cheese for dinner. As the food industry developed during / after World War I, we were told that margerine, Pop Tarts, and Ramen Noodles were good food to be eaten. And the reason they spent so much effort and money marketing these flashy commercials every day into our brains is because they made the stuff and now they have to sell it to us before it rots in the warehouse. Those of us here who have had the surgery have a great responsibility in trying to find a delicate way to be direct when folks ask for advice. The best advice we can always give is that the sleeve is one tool, and your doctor or bariatric team is the next tool. Our responses are based on our personal experience. We surely do want you to be healthy and happy, so be kind to yourself. I call my new and improved stomach "Miss Tummy" and she is the boss of me. If I eat slowly, she will let me know when enough is enough. She throws me a resounding tupperware burp to warn me that if I take another bite or sip, she will see to it that I am miserable and repentant for the next four hours. I am not perfect. Miss Tummy has humbled me many times. So, give your new tummy a name, and let her run the joint (and tell the family that they need to be considerate and not bring junk into the house, eat it in front of you, or expect you to cook it for dinner). Some people get the hiccups or other gastric signal when it's time to put the leftovers away, give them to the dogs, or throw them out. The new you is trying to escape from it's old, tired, sick, achy shell. The fact that you spent the money, made the trip to Mexico, and (allegedly) had the proper surgery shows that somewhere inside you, you really want to have a successful recovery and weight loss. Please come back for encouragement and continue to make posts as concerns come up. Even if all responses are not gentle, look past that and see if you can take away any useful information to help you along. I wish you good luck and good health. Please come back and visit us often.

Back in the day, Dear Abbey offered a generic response to nosy questions: "Why would you want to know?"

So true. My boyfriend and I went to explore a Gordon's food Service store for the first time today. We left the cart and came out empty-handed. We are so used to eating clean fresh food and high quality Protein, that all of that factory-made, flash frozen, stored in a warehouse and then in a truck overpriced crap had no appeal.

The day I made the call, I was told to go to their website and do the on-line seminar. They called me the next day and set an appointment for about three weeks out.

Look at it this way: you are two weeks away from a new birthday. The pre-op is worse than the post-op, once you get past the first couple of weeks. As you get the hang of this, it gets easier and besides that, you become an expert on bariatric nutrition.