Indigo1991

If you think this is bad, weight til you lose weight! I am now at the "OMG, how much have you lost?" stage and when I tell them the number and how I did it, the number of people who go all goggle eyed and do the "you can't have lost all that/ you couldn't possibly have needed to lose all that/ where did you hide it/ eek surgery!!!" So not telling them now gives you breathing space but the opinionated will catch up with you in the end. By then you will be so healthy and fabulous, you won't care :-)))) For now, just smile and say thanks for their input - then ignore every last one of them This is your life and your business - and you know what's best for you...

So, so sorry to hear this :-(((((( I recognise all the emotions and yes, you need to get over it and move on - but, as you tell others, cut yourself some slack today. You have every right to rage at the unfairness of it all. I could never explain to others my anger at my body constantly letting me down when it was in pain and for making me suffer, when I felt perfectly well otherwise. But you and your body need to make up and hang together - it's the RA that's the villain, your body doesn't want it any more than you do. Be kind to yourself, this isn't your fault. Then tomorrow, get back on the horse and focus on how well you are doing post sleeve in terms of your weight becuase long term, that will help the arthritis. I will keep everything crossed that it is a flare rather than anything more xxx

Do what's best for you. True friends will understand why this matters to you, they will see the struggle you have had and will want to help you find a way forward. "Friends" who are full of great ideas - eat less, eat healthy and take your drugs" - have probably never been in your shoes. At the end of the day, it's you who wakes up in the morning to deal with your weight and related issues and you who goes to sleep at night still thinking about them. So whilst everyone can have an opinion, there's only one that truly matters - yours. Everyone on here has had a problem with food, we all got here in different ways and although we have the same surgery, we all deal with it our way (or at least the way our doc tells us to!!). If you feel your addiction can best be dealt with through therapy, go for it. The important thing is that you want to change your your mindset post-op and that's important too in how successful you will be. Good luck, if I had dealt with my weight at 25, I could have saved myself years of problems. You are not pathetic, you are brave to face up to things so decisively at a relatively young age. Remember that :-)))))

Then say yes to yourself - after all, yours is the most important opinion :-))))

Are you conflicted? If everyone round you had said yes, would you be firing ahead and donating your eggs? If so, then there is no conflict, you want to do this. However, you also want the approval of those who are around you. That's where the conflict lies. I understand that, it's comforting when people agree with our decisions. But this is your decision. The money raised is for you to finish a process you started. As you said, you worked hard to get healthy - so why hesitate now? How will you feel if you let others views stop you? I think you already know the answer and just want someone to tell you to go for it. But you have to be brave and make this decision for yourself. We can only live our life - no one else can do it for us, not even our friends who, no matter how close, have never walked a mile in our shoes... Good luck!

Thanks! I love my new look but I love my much improved health even more :-))) Miss Mac, the 24th will be here before you know it - and then the adventure begins.... Sounds as if you are from a bunch of intrepid explorers - your surgery is the modern day equivalent lol!

MissMac, my family also have connections with Co Antrim - half of them come from there! It's a small world! Hope all is well with you :-)

You may find that your surgeon will give you a lot of info that answers your questions - but unlikely he will offer anything around q4 you will need to ask! I wanted to know about pain relief post op, how long stitches took to dissolve, how long before exercise, driving etc, risk of leak or any other potential problems/complications, how much weight he believed I would lose, what would the impact be on existing conditions/meds.. I could go on - and there were other questions that arose as a result of stuff he said on the day. You are right to prepare - good luck with the consultation.

I was 60/30 and now it's 30/30. My nut says eventually I may be able to eat and drink but I have got into the habit of not drinking around mealtimes, so might stick with it. Used to drink with my food and am convinced that's why I ate more than I needed.

Aggie1234, he was my surgeon too. He's excellent, you are in good hands :-)

Arts137, just burst out laughing and scared the people round me - great description!!,

Woo hoo, almost there! You must be so pleased - and if it has been tough of late, this must feel even sweeter. Enjoy it, you deserve it after losing a serious amount of weight in only 9 months....

It's a good sign - you are burning fat! It does settle down and get better....

It really is up to you who you tell and what you say. I told very few people in advance because I didn't want their opinions.likewise, I didn't want to have to keep reassuring them it would be ok when I was pretty apprehensive myself, lol! However, once I started losing weight and people started asking why, I shocked myself by telling them the whole story!!! I certainly wasn't ashamed at any stage, that's not why I didn't speak up sooner. But you know the people in your life and how they will react - my attitude was that I didn't want to invite opinions I knew wouldn't be positive. Do what you want, this is your journey and theres no right or wrong thing to do. But keep an open mind - you may want to tell others as time goes by. Good luck :-)

Like many things, it's each to their own. I told few people in advance cos I didn't want their opinions or to have to allay their fears when I was dealing with my own. Post op, it was only when I had lost a fair chunk of weight that people starting commenting. At that point I started to tell everyone and anyone who'd listen, lol!!! I have shocked myself at how open I have been but I am very happy explaining it. The majority get why I had the surgery; most are blown away by me being "brave" doing it and at the results. No judgement. But as I say, there's no right or wrong way. I wasn't ashamed when I didn't tell, it was right for me then, in the way that it is right for me now to tell all.... Good luck, bet you look fab in the photo shoot with the new look :-)))))

You have a significant illness and comorbidites - your BMI is only one indication of whether you need the surgery, you also need it to treat that illness. I hope you get the approval ... will have everything crossed for you. Perhaps after that life will take a step change for the better for you

Aggie1234, you will be in very good hands - who's your surgeon? I am now almost 5 months out and reading my early posts reminds how it new it all was then! I started at 101 kilos, then pre-surgery I lost weight with the diet which took me to 93k. Since the end of April, I have lost just over 24 kilos and now weigh 69 kilos. I have 5 kilos to go - as I am having a breast reduction, the surgeon wants me to leave him 2-3 kilos to play with, so I really only have 2-3 kilos to go. You won't believe how life changing this surgery is.... not necessarily the easy option but great results if you work with it. Hope your tests today have gone well, am sure you will be fine. Great team there, Lorna is lovely :-)

I think you shared your story just to make the rest of us green with envy, lol!!!! You go for it, there's something to be said for being happy and confident - feelings that are sadly underestimated but really important to our overall wellbeing. And that's a great context in which you are now making your journey. Better that than struggling because you are alone and miserable.... Of course you need to get your Vitamins in and keep focused so that you don't slide. But I bet you will after all this encouraging feedback. Life is there to be enjoyed and lived - good for you for grabbing it with both hands. If it's this good with 100lbs to go, please don't post when you get to your target, it will be adult rated content by then

Thanks :-)))))))

I am with Gamergirl - keep it simple, you are only two months out and if you go with that, you won't go far wrong. Nothing much makes me feel ill either but strangely that still makes me cautious about my food choices. So Protein first, turkey, chicken, tuna, fish, eggs, cheese are all good as the heart of a meal. I made omelettes with cheese, bought smoked fish and turned my ground beef into mild chilli. I am no cook so am with you on the recipes thing - but I recognised that I had to try to make my food a bit interesting or I would slip back into eating whatever was to hand and easy. Good luck, you made a good choice being sleeved, keep breathing and relax, won't be long til you are more used to the new normal and you might look back and wonder why you were concerned :-)

Katierebecca83, you are a star - you were right. Now the right way up, lol

Thanks! I have done it from my iPad... Will try from PC :-)

I don't know how I did it but my new profile pic is sideways... Can't see how to rotate it - any advice??? Thanks :-)

Agree with Ima Loser, have a general target to aim for then refine as u get closer. BMI charts are helpful tools but don't really tell the whe story of what u will look like at a particular weight. So keep an open mind. At 5'2, my top end BMI weight is 140 (I started Pre op diet at 223) but my cosmetic surgeon says I have to "give" him 7lbs which will come off when he does my boobs. So my next target is 147. I am currently 154, which leaves me 11lbs to go but my nut and doc are recommending only another 5-6lbs because, at my age of 52, I may end up looking scrawny around my face and neck. I am now a size 8 and small (was a good 18 and 2XL) despite being overweight on the BMI chart!!!! So I am aiming for roughly 7 more lbs but will take it lb by lb until I feel that's enough. Good luck to you, I hope u are as happy with ur sleeve and the results as I am with mine :-)

In Scotland we'd say "lucky white heather" which means u need some! Sorry to hear u are having such a cr@p time of it. Totally get the work thing- clients, don't u just love them- not! :-))))))) Hope back pain is subsiding and that u are a bit more mobile. Then maybe u can do something to take ur mind off ur youngest's absence... As ever, this too shall pass, hang in there, Friday 13th is behind u!!!!!