So it's been about 4 1/2 months since my surgery. I'm down 112 lbs since November 2012. I haven't seen my surgeon since my 2 week follow up appointment. I say it's because he's all the way in Chicago (a 45m - 1 1/2h drive depending on the time of day) but I sure didn't have a problem making those pre-op appointments!!... in the winter... with the snow... So, I'll fess up here and say I haven't gone because I know I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing. I feel like for everything I do right, I'm going something wrong.

I'm getting in my Protein, but I'm also skipping my Vitamins A LOT. I just forget to take them. I don't know why this has started happening, I took so much stuff pre-op like clockwork and never had this problem. Post-op absent mindedness, perhaps? Anyway, while I haven't seen my surgeon, I have been getting my blood work with my more conveniently located PCP. I just had blood drawn yesterday, I'll see him on Tuesday and find out if I'm seriously deficient anywhere due to my lack of consistent Vitamin use...

Also, I'm getting exercise in the form of walking, but haven't been to my gym in at least 2 months. It might be more like 3 months... why? I have no idea. I'll go walk a trail for a couple miles, but I have no motivation to go lift weights. I've been seriously slacking on my workouts for a while. I'm not sure I ever got back on track after surgery, although I was getting it in when I was testing my limits while recovering. It just dropped off when summer really kicked in.

A big part of that is because I've been dating. A LOT. I've had more male affection in the past 2-3 months than I've had in my life for the past 5-6 years. It's been amazing, enlightening, exhausting, a little painful and overall lots of fun. I feel like I need to slow down and shift the focus back to myself. I like something about each of the few guys I'm seeing, but none of them is the full package or giving me that 'spark' that I want to feel with the person I'm with.

I know there are a lot of people who will want to criticize or judge me for dating, for slacking on my diet and exercise, for being a bit promiscuous. I know this because I find myself thinking harshly of my own actions and wonder why I'm doing it... right now I need to build my ego a little bit. These men are helping me feel like a woman again. I've been single for so long, I've forgotten how to date. I still find myself not knowing what to say to guys on dates. I feel like I have no good stories to tell because I've wasted my life feeling too fat to participate in anything. So now that I'm down to a size that lots of men find attractive - tho I still have over 100lbs to lose, there are plenty of very attractive men who like a plus size figure - it's been a lot of fun receiving all of this attention! Considering how long I went without, this barely covers what I've missed out on. My recovery from this surgery reinforced my will to live and be happy living, which has meant less time in the gym and more time with a man... but it's all exercise, right? I mean, if I'm so tired I can't walk right the next day, doesn't that count for something? AM I REVEALING TOO MUCH?? lol...

I share all of this because I want pre-op people to know how quickly life changes... it's something I honestly didn't consider much and really couldn't imagine how different it would be. I have never been confident when it comes to men, I've been single most of my adult life, so this is all such a 360 from where I was even 3-4 months ago. It's wonderful, it's exciting, it's DISTRACTING. I let myself get off track with all this excitement. I'm glad only a few months have passed and now that I'm checking myself, I'm going to get back on track. But just know how fragile the lifestyle changes are.. you have to stay present. Don't take your eye off the prize.. I'm sorry for the time I've lost to work on myself, but I also know I had a lot of fun and don't regret having those experiences, either. I can't beat myself up about it. I'm human. Just gonna change course and carry on!

I'm going to write a memoir of this time in my life. And I promise to start taking my vitamins.

Ah cut yourself some slack. There are a lot of changes going on and if the two worst things you've done are not gone to the gym and are skipping your Vitamins...it could be worse.

Are you eating junk? Are you grazing? Are you putting on weight? Are you getting your Protein and Water in?

If you have the correct answers to those questions (3 noes and 2 yesses lol) then it's not the end of the world if your exercise happens outside of a gym

Take the vitamins though. That's easy enough. I take gummies because I hate taking pills but I look forward to the gummies.

Glad you're having fun and be careful.

No one is interested in judging you.....But you cannot get enough food in to keep your Vitamin deficiency up. It is imperative that you take them.....Exercise is exercise I guess....

But you will feel even better about your new life if you do what you have set out to do..Become a stronger healthier you.

Plan ahead with eating at this busy time in your life and hit the Protein shakes more if you have to to get the amount of protein you need....And remember it can only get better and better ad you travel this journey!

Ah cut yourself some slack. There are a lot of changes going on and if the two worst things you've done are not gone to the gym and are skipping your Vitamins...it could be worse.

Are you eating junk? Are you grazing? Are you putting on weight? Are you getting your Protein and Water in?

If you have the correct answers to those questions (3 noes and 2 yesses lol) then it's not the end of the world if your exercise happens outside of a gym

Take the vitamins though. That's easy enough. I take gummies because I hate taking pills but I look forward to the gummies.

Glad you're having fun and be careful.

I'm being careful - getting in my protein, but strugging with the water (I try). I've been eating okay but I do have some junk here and there, obviously only a bite or two, but literally only once or twice a month. I really have no appetite, I have to remind myself to eat to get my protein in. I've been steadily losing - had a couple stalls here and there, but haven't regained.

Overall, I think I'm doing okay.

Could do better. I'm gonna work on it!

For the Vitamins, I put mine in a pill holder and keep it by my toothbrush. It helps me to remember to take them morning and evening. Find some easy to grab Protein and fluids such as bottled Water or low cal drinks, low fat lunch meat and cheese and beef Jerky. It's easier to get stuff in if its ready to eat. The Fage and Chobani Greek yogurt cups are good too.

Glad you are enjoying your new life!

Lynda

Please...Please...put yourself first! I kind of chuckle when you said you been dating a a lot. I did the same thing when I lost about 90lbs. I was loving all the attention.. And gain it all back and some. Don't lose focus. The men will be there after.. And you can continue to date but be more aware of YOUR goal.

Like Gamergirl said cut yourself some slack. Do the things you need to like getting your protein in and water( like isereno said find some portable protein to take with you), buy gummy vitamins to take you might enjoy them, and have the guys take you out dancing or roller skating or hiking...... just saying you can have fun and get in your exercise. Enjoy your weight loss and never forget that you are doing it for you, so can continue to enjoy life.

I think you shared your story just to make the rest of us green with envy, lol!!!! You go for it, there's something to be said for being happy and confident - feelings that are sadly underestimated but really important to our overall wellbeing. And that's a great context in which you are now making your journey. Better that than struggling because you are alone and miserable....

Of course you need to get your Vitamins in and keep focused so that you don't slide. But I bet you will after all this encouraging feedback. Life is there to be enjoyed and lived - good for you for grabbing it with both hands. If it's this good with 100lbs to go, please don't post when you get to your target, it will be adult rated content by then